kids stopped from attending mothers f...

kids stopped from attending mothers funeral

Posted in the McKee Forum

FUNERAL DISASTER

Langley, KY

#1 May 14, 2007
We are looking for help! Our mother passed away Friday.My sister called me that morning to let me know my mother had passed away.She told me that my moms current husband (which is in question)stated that myself and one other sister was not to attend the funeral.I called the funeral director at LAKES FUNERAL HOME and he told me that NO WAY would they try to stop or encourage a family member from attending.Well I called my sister back and told her I was planning on attending and she told me arrangements were being made at 11a.m. on Saturday....When I arrived...they had already shown up and made arrangements without me.I then called another sister and asked her and told her we should go to the funeral home before the showing time that the director told me they had set.On the funeral directors deceased phone recordings it stated the times of viewing and the funeral...but after talking to my second sister..who musta called them...they changed the recording to no viewing would take place..also they said the casket would be closed...but after we were turned away by the state police from attending...they opened it for viewing.Who gets to decide who is able to attend a funeral and who doesn`t?..there are 8 kids and 2 step kids...I myself am 3rd oldest...the reason I question is First....The director told us he couldn`t or wouldn`t try to keep us away...Second...why does my other brothers and sisters get to decide who can or cannot come...Third...it`s still in question if my mother was even married to this man as I have been unable to or has anyone shown me a marriage liscense....Fourth..they stated that it was my mothers wish that me and my sister not attend but yet could not provide any type of paper stating such...Fifth ...they decided who viewed her...From the funeral homes standpoint I feel like I was lied to from the beginning...I arrived and the director told me I could not view my mother because her husband/man said that was per her request...but told us we could attend...then after he told us the times... they found out I was coming..they changed them...then after we were turned away...then they changed them again so the rest of them could view her.... The director said he wouldn`t turn anyone away and instead of explaining that to those family members...he sided with them and sent us away.When you take your loved ones to a funeral home...I feel they should be more professional....this man made a decision...and the last time that I could ever see my mother was takin away...why...because HE decided that only certain members of my family could attend....lets flip it around....I come in there and demand that they get turned away and only myself and one sister get ..to see her...I NEED ANYONES HELP....ALL I WANTED TO SAY WAS ...I LOVE YOU MOM
Dip from Drip Rock

Goose Creek, SC

#2 Jan 4, 2010
Hey did you talk to an atterny? You may need to. And you can actually go to the court house and get a copy of any ones marriage licence. With a littl foot work you can find out any thing on any one. I believe in my heart kids should be able to come to a funeral for any of there parents. I was wandering if there was something I could do to help with advice!
like to no

Windfall, IN

#3 Jan 4, 2010
wow that sad i no how you feel tho cause when my dad died we was told not to come by my older sister cause my mom an dad divorced when i was a child my mom remarried an my step dad raised me an when my real dad died me an my other sisters was not allowed to attend the furneal....not right the sister that told us we couldnt attend was raised by my dad......
Dip from Drip Rock

Goose Creek, SC

#4 Jan 4, 2010
I know how it is too! But the word needs to get out there that it just isn't right to keep people from funerals...now if it was a life and death thing that would be so different!
you think

Pikeville, KY

#5 Jan 4, 2010
The only reason, in my opinion, a child should be turned away is if that child treated the parent bad. I feel that if my child never had anything to do with me in life, why come to my funeral....I think they would only be coming to ease their guilt.
As far a having the legal right, a husband does have the right to decide everything for the one who has passed, unless there is a will.
truth

Pikeville, KY

#6 Jan 4, 2010
Did you have a good relationship with your mom if not why do you want to go. When was the last time you saw her. Apparently she like her hubby or the guy she live with. There always 2 side to a story I'm sure it not as innocent as it sounds.
Dip from Drip Rock

Goose Creek, SC

#8 Jan 5, 2010
And may be the guilt! But still it could be worse with because the guilt will build because they can't say that they was sorry and get forgivness.
a daughter of the mother

Mckee, KY

#9 Jan 10, 2010
yes i had a good relationship with my mom'''''reason i didnt get to go was because i said my mommy was to nosey''''but i loved her and she loved me we talked everyday on the phone till i said that to my brother and he went and told her she got upset'''''so when my mom died my brothers and sisters died but there day is coming and her man died a few months later so i know my mom is at rest now and mom said she wanted all her kids together under one roof but she didnt get her wish cause some acted like babies and still are babies''''signed by a daughter'''i love ya mom and always will.
truth

Pikeville, KY

#10 Jan 10, 2010
First of all you should forgive your family , most time people falls out over pity thing that amount to nothing If you can't forgive them the only person you hurting is yourself.
this is sad

Harold, KY

#11 Jan 11, 2010
verry verry sad
Minnie Mouse Banger

Mckee, KY

#12 Jan 11, 2010
FUNERAL DISASTER wrote:
We are looking for help! Our mother passed away Friday.My sister called me that morning to let me know my mother had passed away.She told me that my moms current husband (which is in question)stated that myself and one other sister was not to attend the funeral.I called the funeral director at LAKES FUNERAL HOME and he told me that NO WAY would they try to stop or encourage a family member from attending.Well I called my sister back and told her I was planning on attending and she told me arrangements were being made at 11a.m. on Saturday....When I arrived...they had already shown up and made arrangements without me.I then called another sister and asked her and told her we should go to the funeral home before the showing time that the director told me they had set.On the funeral directors deceased phone recordings it stated the times of viewing and the funeral...but after talking to my second sister..who musta called them...they changed the recording to no viewing would take place..also they said the casket would be closed...but after we were turned away by the state police from attending...they opened it for viewing.Who gets to decide who is able to attend a funeral and who doesn`t?..there are 8 kids and 2 step kids...I myself am 3rd oldest...the reason I question is First....The director told us he couldn`t or wouldn`t try to keep us away...Second...why does my other brothers and sisters get to decide who can or cannot come...Third...it`s still in question if my mother was even married to this man as I have been unable to or has anyone shown me a marriage liscense....Fourth..they stated that it was my mothers wish that me and my sister not attend but yet could not provide any type of paper stating such...Fifth ...they decided who viewed her...From the funeral homes standpoint I feel like I was lied to from the beginning...I arrived and the director told me I could not view my mother because her husband/man said that was per her request...but told us we could attend...then after he told us the times... they found out I was coming..they changed them...then after we were turned away...then they changed them again so the rest of them could view her.... The director said he wouldn`t turn anyone away and instead of explaining that to those family members...he sided with them and sent us away.When you take your loved ones to a funeral home...I feel they should be more professional....this man made a decision...and the last time that I could ever see my mother was takin away...why...because HE decided that only certain members of my family could attend....lets flip it around....I come in there and demand that they get turned away and only myself and one sister get ..to see her...I NEED ANYONES HELP....ALL I WANTED TO SAY WAS ...I LOVE YOU MOM
Big foot for coroner

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