Any parents of children in jail forum

Created by Twiggy on Jul 2, 2009

283 votes

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How do you cope

When does it get easier

How to help others

Is there help

Yes its real

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Since: Jan 09

Hersey, Michigan

#42 Oct 15, 2011
Twiggy wrote:
<quoted text>
Can you please explain to me why you think that. There are many parents out there who have children in prison and some of these people need someone where to turn to discuss what there feelings are about what has happened to there family. You dont really need to comment on this thread if you dont agree with it, unless you also have a loved on that has been incarcerated and are having a difficult time dealing with it. I hey think this thread is a very healthy way for parents to get some things off there chests that they cant talk about on other threads. My Mom has told me several times that if there is nothing to be found to say about someone else, then dont say anything at all. Good advice for you bunnee.
I don't think you've come to terms with reality and are just looking for others to join your big pity party.
Jail Nation

Cairo, Egypt

#44 Jan 16, 2012
Many people are sentenced to jail - however, a great number of these people never step one foot into a jail cell. There are laws that allow for defendants to complete their jail time in alternative programs. Criminal defense attorneys, by necessity, have to become experts in finding alternatives to incarceration
__________
[url=http://www.jailnation.com ]Jail Nation - USA Jails Addresses and Phone Numbers Database[/url]
Jail Nation

Cairo, Egypt

#45 Jan 16, 2012
url=http://www.jailnation.com
devistated mum

Perth, Australia

#46 Feb 10, 2012
Twiggy wrote:
Are there any parents or loved ones out there who have children in jail. Mine is in for life and I am wondering is there is a support group out there to help with the healing process.. Please join this thread and we will try to help each other. We can share our stories.
I realize 3 years has past and i hope you are coping with you grief, i also have a child in prison on life. i decided just the other week i'm going to start a support group myself it needs to be a secret society, so there are no revenge attacks etc. I'm working over how to best go about it as i din't like these on line forums as you really don't know who you are talking to. Please let me know how you a coping and if you get this.
All the best from devistated mum.
PS i will save this link and check from time to time.
Chases Mom

Muskegon, MI

#47 May 8, 2012
I was looking for a support group, as I have a child In prison. Coming here I thought Ide find people who relate to my pain, Im horrified by what Ive read. All I want to say to you few chosen people, Is that Jesus died for your sins also, and untill your the parent of a child In prison, don't judge others and definitely don't pretend to know what It's like.
I'll look elsewhere...
Ell

Australia

#48 Jul 22, 2012
Twiggy, I currently have a son in prison. I understand the pain,blame,guilt,and all the other emotions associated with you. Firstly you need to stay well and strong as he needs MONEY for buy up. Even if you can only manage something small it's better than nothing. I'd like to say to you I'm sorry this has happened to us . I choose not to tell people as they are unsupportive and judgmental. My sister told me to go kill myself as it is all my fault. You'll learn very quickly they are the ones to stay away from. We all make mistakes in this life, sadly drugs,alcohol,mental illness, disadvantage situations,predators, can all contribute to why and how our children walk down these dark roads. Please don't blame. I would like to send you & your son my love.
Sharon

Saint-charles, Canada

#49 Aug 20, 2012
I am also looking for a friend if you have found any please let me know!
Kabo

Saint Louis, MO

#50 Jan 4, 2013
Twiggy wrote:
Are there any parents or loved ones out there who have children in jail. Mine is in for life and I am wondering is there is a support group out there to help with the healing process.. Please join this thread and we will try to help each other. We can share our stories.
I started nor reply to this post but after reading all of the negative comments I had too.
First if you haven't experience this type of situation " mother of an inmate" it may be difficult
To have empathy . Hopefully, you can find a support group to help you deal with the very
Fact of aknowlegding you child is a criminal, the fact thatt you have actually lost a son , the fact that
He is murder etc, that close friends may unfriendly you and you maybe to embrassed to share
Your sons unfortunate troubled and disturbed live with others.
Then on the other hand you must remember he is still alive and and you can visit him,
When my son was convicted for 2nd degree murder it almost literally killed me. But by the Grace of God I begin to pray and focus on the victims's family. they will never see their loved ones again. no moe holiday, birthdays and know laughter for them. In time this too shall past. I am praying for hate and crime to decrease,

Get involve some type voluneer work and give back to the community or join a church forr spiritual support,
Billy

Jackson, MS

#51 Apr 4, 2013
I have a 19 yr old that was involved in a fight he didn't come home one night the next morning he called said he was in jail and said he didn't do what he was accused of . This was his first time in jail we had a hearing he was charged with agravated assault we put 6thoudands dollars up for bail he didn't have any money so a public defender was appointed . We were told that if he plea guilty the judge would be easy on the sentance he was first time offender no weapons were involved he was saving the expense of trial . He received 20 yrs with 5 suspended . My advice go to trial you have more options avalible to you you give up to much with plea.
Billy

Jackson, MS

#52 Apr 4, 2013
I as a parent I did nothing to cause the pain I have to go through with my son locked up. You see I live in a city that is next door to jackson ms everyday there are people that kill someone and there back on the street so if all my son did was be inolved in a fight its not that big a deal. Judge Emfinger is cold hearted judge Jesus will judge him by the standard he used to judge others and saying it was my job isn't going to do any good.He's been there a year seems like forever .
Billy

Jackson, MS

#53 Apr 4, 2013
We are allowed to visit him every first and 3rd Saturday for 4 hrs . What is he learning in there you ask he cusses like a sailor he has tattoos you can buy anything you want the guards are more corrupt than the kids in there you can't trust anybody the people that run the place only care about making a profit off the person that is in there and there loved ones . Most people say they deserve what they get the parent is serving the same sentence as the child only thing is child gets 3 meals a day where parent has to work for everything they get . The appeal process starts around 20 thousand with no guarantee everything in prison is twice what it cost in the real world a 15 minute phone call will cost 15 dollars that's a dollar a minute if you wAnt to wear deodorant in there you will have to purchase that from the canteen need paper and pencil you have to purchase that to .
Billy

Jackson, MS

#54 Apr 4, 2013
Don't judge others until you walk in their shoes don't say what you are not going to do until you are faced with the question
loveyoubub

Sturgeon Falls, Canada

#55 Jun 15, 2013
I have a son currently incarcerated for a "home invasion" which involved a well known drug dealer....he got knocked down and apparently all hell broke loose..........twiggy ...I have done the whole run of why..how...when....what did i do wrong...all of it....you have to find peace within yourself and let your child know that he did the crime and now does the time and thats it......you have to carry on with stuff and ensure you dont do all your living for him. the heart hurts and yes there are alot of situations where i just want to break down in tears...but it is what it is.....
Dave316

Seattle, WA

#56 Jul 19, 2013
The first part of this thread was all about support resources. For anyone in this situation, a lot of them are broken down by the type of help needed, such as whether the inmate is male or female, type of conviction, whether the person is a lifer or not, what State he or she is in, and sometimes even by what facility there. Personally I think Prison Talk has among the deepest and most specific help for a person's or relative's / friend's situation, but there are others. Write-a-Prisoner can be an important service for those who just need contact, or more contact, with the outside world. Then there's the commercial services that help with assets and finances. These can be huge in relieving family burdens, dealing with all the needs and requests, and helping someone be much more ready financially for release (or even to just have basic financial resources for the time in prison). The best of these are Outside Logistics Services for inmates who meet educational and behavioral goals (and also for people with big resources or business issues to manage), and Prisoner Assistant. These both provide all sorts of services customized to the inmate's or family's situation. Hope this helps.
konia

Larkspur, CA

#57 Dec 28, 2013
Twiggy wrote:
Are there any parents or loved ones out there who have children in jail. Mine is in for life and I am wondering is there is a support group out there to help with the healing process.. Please join this thread and we will try to help each other. We can share our stories.
Hi Twiggy
I feel your desire to reach out. I can relate I have a child that is in for life as well and another looking at some real time just recently. You must be in real pain and looking for some kind of recognition for the kind of pain you are experiencing. I am so sorry that so many people have responded with such visceral and heartless remarks to you as a mother. But no one can understand how you can love your child no matter what but that's a mothers love. When we look at our children we don't see what others see we see that same precious face smiling back at us when they were babies. True they are full grown adults now needing to be accountable for their own actions but that does not stop your heart from breaking as a mother. What hurts is watching what they have to go through even if it is at their own hands. We all want the best for our children. No body at least i hope no one hopes that's when their child is born they grow up to be anything but a productive human being in society. When that dream is not fulfilled and the worst happens the pain you feel is unbearable. When my daughter first went to prison i thought i wish she had died that way she would not have to be in a horrible place hell on earth. But I have since changed my way of thinking. because I am glad she is still here as long as she is still here she has a chance. I know that God hears my prayers about my children. I believe that one day she will be free. In the meantime I have to hold on to Gods unchanging hand. Be encouraged. if you ever want to talk some more I am here.
Christian Stocker

Loma Linda, CA

#58 Feb 3, 2014
Twiggy wrote:
Are there any parents or loved ones out there who have children in jail. Mine is in for life and I am wondering is there is a support group out there to help with the healing process.. Please join this thread and we will try to help each other. We can share our stories.
I have a 41 year old son who almost killed his brother. He is in Fulsom Prison for 3 more years. He will not answer my letters or will he make things right and put his life together. I am on both ends of the hurt. One son who almost died and another that almost killed him.
There is only one way to cope and that is with God in your heart. We do not like the sin but we love the sinner. We can not heal unless we forgive those who have done wrong and hurts us. When we truly forgive you will find piece in your heart that you never knew existed.
Forgiveness is one of keys to salvation. All crimes are a sin and all sins are equal in God's eyes. There is no different levels of sin. God forgives all sin's if we ask him to and believe in Him. God hates the sin and loves the sinner. Forgiveness is divine and all things are possible if you put your burdens and cares in God's hands. It works every time it is tried.
God never gives us more than we can handle. It builds character, trust and gives up a foundation to build on.
I hope you find piece in your heart and forgiveness.

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