Child Support Fraud
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Father

Marion, NC

#1 Oct 20, 2013
Can someone point me in the right direction of inappropriate use of child support payments, if there is such a thing?
hahaha

Thomasville, NC

#2 Oct 20, 2013
Yeah if you can prove what they actually buying . Drugs alcohol ect ....lots of that going on ...
really

Valley, AL

#3 Oct 21, 2013
Sorry hun without hard core proof that money is hers she can spend it however she pleases. It either is direct deposited into her bank account or she has a child support debit card. They could prob. Track what she buys on the card but she can also go to an ATM and get the cash.
Truth Hurts

Marion, NC

#4 Oct 21, 2013
Well if you lie you can get in major trouble. It's called fraud and if you have a history of this behavior it's just going to snowball on you. Honesty is the best policy. Women do tend to use the money for selfish reasons and not on their child. If the child's father is a good guy why wouldn't you do joint custody? No child support and work together? It's just a control mechanism some women like to hang over a mans head to get whatever they want. It will comeback on you. Material things aren't love anyway. Spending time is.
Father

United States

#5 Oct 21, 2013
This was what I thought. I am certain an atm is being used, and not for things for my son. I am certain that my ex-wife is using part of the money to buy beer and stuff like that with it. Material things are not part of the equation, just money that is supposed to be for my son being used for her personal gain.

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#6 Oct 21, 2013
Why not contact the Child Support personnel in charge of your case? You should definitely have assurances that the money is being spent on your child, for food/clothes/scholastic activities/MD & DDS visits/medications/gas to drive the child to and fro. I agree with the post above, mutual agreements, if possible, where Child Support services are not needed to be rendered, is the best course of action. I have personal experience doing that with my daughter an ex, and it works much, much better that way. If your ex will use a dose of pragmatism, she will understand that it works for the best. Best of luck to you!
Truth Hurts

Marion, NC

#7 Oct 22, 2013
Father wrote:
This was what I thought. I am certain an atm is being used, and not for things for my son. I am certain that my ex-wife is using part of the money to buy beer and stuff like that with it. Material things are not part of the equation, just money that is supposed to be for my son being used for her personal gain.
I'm sorry you are going through this. Some women are only concerned with money and its a shame. The children involved will notice this the older they get and resent her for it. When you make the decision to become a parent at that point you have to do what's best for them not you. Best respectful of the child's father and try to work together for the good of your child. I see this situation a lot and its sad. It's the "Do what I say but not what I do attitude". The woman will hold the child's father over a bucket trying to get every dime she can out of him. She will raise hell about who he dates/who he might have around their child(I say might because she may not really know but it won't matter she still raises hell) Meanwhile she will do whatever she wants . Date whoever have whoever she wants around their child and he can't say anything because she has all the power and she knows it. Shouldn't be that way. Is this you?? Lol. I'm so sorry if it is. Happens a lot to men.
eightball

Asheville, NC

#8 Oct 22, 2013
It would seem like you would have some control over how she spends the money, but unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. First hand experience, right here. It would be nice to have a public service announcement for young men as a reminder to wear a condom simply to prevent these young, unmarried men falling into the trap of a girl who wants the man, the baby and the money at any cost. However, if you are married to someone and the decision is to have a child, you are responsible to that child.
You continue to do the right thing and she will eventually have to answer for her wrong doings through God, Karma, Buddha or whatever. You can't do wrong without it coming back to bite you.
Truth Hurts

Marion, NC

#9 Oct 22, 2013
eightball wrote:
It would seem like you would have some control over how she spends the money, but unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. First hand experience, right here. It would be nice to have a public service announcement for young men as a reminder to wear a condom simply to prevent these young, unmarried men falling into the trap of a girl who wants the man, the baby and the money at any cost. However, if you are married to someone and the decision is to have a child, you are responsible to that child.
You continue to do the right thing and she will eventually have to answer for her wrong doings through God, Karma, Buddha or whatever. You can't do wrong without it coming back to bite you.
True it will come back on you. I see women that the children would be better off with their fathers but for whatever reason the mother has all the rights. Just because you pop out a baby doesn't make you a mother. It makes you a breeder and your reasons for having a child should be for the right reasons. Men do need to wrap it up if they don't want kids because you can't trust women to always do the right thing. A lot of them are plotting females and I can tell you this(I am a mom) I wish they wouldn't drag children into their schemes it's just not right. If my relationship didn't work out I sure wouldn't make my kids suffer. They love their Dad and I teach them to respect him because he works hard for his family and it will always be that way no matter what. Respect is something people forget about don't talk crazy about the father of your child in front of your kids and vice versa. Dads are important too don't forget that.
broke

Burnsville, NC

#10 Oct 23, 2013
dont have babies with hoodrats .
Aliens did it

Marion, NC

#11 Oct 23, 2013
Or with a female that her and the truth don't know each other lol. Regardless of whatever lying is messed up and trying to rake a man over the coals because you see $$$ isn't right. It's going to catch up with you and I don't have to be able to see the future to tell you that. Honest is always the way to go. I can't stand hypocrites. Sometimes people never see the people they become when they are too busy trying to point out other people's flaws. Do some serious soul searching before it's too late we aren't promised tomorrow. Money is the root of ALL evil.
Truth

United States

#12 Oct 23, 2013
Aliens did it wrote:
Or with a female that her and the truth don't know each other lol. Regardless of whatever lying is messed up and trying to rake a man over the coals because you see $$$ isn't right. It's going to catch up with you and I don't have to be able to see the future to tell you that. Honest is always the way to go. I can't stand hypocrites. Sometimes people never see the people they become when they are too busy trying to point out other people's flaws. Do some serious soul searching before it's too late we aren't promised tomorrow. Money is the root of ALL evil.
that's what broke people say and that's not true
Aliens did it

Marion, NC

#13 Oct 23, 2013
Truth wrote:
<quoted text> that's what broke people say and that's not true
What fake people say and they aren't fooling anyone. Who claim to be " famous" or " queens" and their whole life is a lie. You don't have to get it. You have to answer for what you do not me. Have a good day puppets.
Aliens did it

Marion, NC

#14 Oct 23, 2013
You know we wonder what's wrong with kids in the United States ? Parents that act like they are without fault blame everyone but yourself mentality. Parents that are bullies that say things in public acting like big shots with no respect so consumed with materialistic things. Parents that set really bad examples for their kids then when it hits the fan they want to blame someone. His grades are bad =blame the teacher , he gets in trouble for being a bully = parent bullies the school officials . That's why some kids have no conscience. Why nowadays we have to worry about school safety. So remember your children will be carbon copies of you and it's all on you to answer for. Luckily some children are pretty much raised by grandparents so the mothers can be out all night that's probably a very good thing for them. There is a lot of that these days. God bless the good parents that are in it for the right reasons not to keep a man from leaving/monetary gain or to be on welfare. Take a hard look at yourself. I know who I am and I'm good with me.
bob

Marion, NC

#15 Oct 24, 2013
U cant do s h i t. she probably has used her own money at times for yalls child , so its the equivalent of her just saying she used your money for the child and her money for beer. cant do a whole lot if she has other sources of income. but if she dont work and is just living off your money to get hammered then maybe get off your a s s and use your money for a lawyer and fight for custody. you picked to sleep wit this gal so don't try to put her down now. god forbid I'm sure u use your own money for a 6 pack when it could be used for your kid. its 2013 people will do whatever and the law won't do s h i t. They can't really buckle down on people trading food stamps for money.
Not scared

Marion, NC

#16 Oct 24, 2013
Wow .....somebody's angry but fraud is still fraud and if you continually lie they pile up on you. The Republicans are cracking down on it across the board McCrory has started all kinds of new penalties. Look it up. Unemployment fraud, child support fraud, etc. You lie one time and they catch you and you will NEVER be able to get any kind of help again. It's not a game. Tell the truth you don't have anything to worry about.

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#17 Oct 24, 2013
"bob", she SHOULD use some of her on money forbthe child/children. She would be EXTREMELY negligent and remiss of her parental duties if she doesn't share the fiscal burden of said child/children. A legitimately caring mother would spend her on funds on the child, regardless of the situation. Imho, child support funds should only be used durectly on and for the children; i.e.: food, clothing, medical needs, hygiene, and gas to and from activities for the child (PERIOD!, not for the mom to run her errands, go to work, etc) and other child specific duties. It seems that in this day and time of ever increasing equality amongst races, gender and sexual orientation that men would be on par when it comes to equal custody of their children as it appliez to their estranged spouse. Unfortunately, the legal system ia skewed towards women having more parental rigbts. Those inequalities help feed the fire of vile and vitriolic speech espoused by mothers that could work iut split custody arrangements amicably with their ex-partners. I think that a large percentage of these mothers do not do this because they can make their ex-partners suffer, be subservient and in a way force them into servitude financially and mentally - all to force undue suffering from their on vendettas and insecurities.

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#18 Oct 24, 2013
And I see a spelling error or two above, so the grammar and spelling Nazis needn't point it out.
Well said

Marion, NC

#19 Oct 24, 2013
pain_in_the_world wrote:
And I see a spelling error or two above, so the grammar and spelling Nazis needn't point it out.
Excellent post very well said.
bob

Marion, NC

#20 Oct 24, 2013
pain_in_the_world wrote:
"bob", she SHOULD use some of her on money forbthe child/children. She would be EXTREMELY negligent and remiss of her parental duties if she doesn't share the fiscal burden of said child/children. A legitimately caring mother would spend her on funds on the child, regardless of the situation. Imho, child support funds should only be used durectly on and for the children; i.e.: food, clothing, medical needs, hygiene, and gas to and from activities for the child (PERIOD!, not for the mom to run her errands, go to work, etc) and other child specific duties. It seems that in this day and time of ever increasing equality amongst races, gender and sexual orientation that men would be on par when it comes to equal custody of their children as it appliez to their estranged spouse. Unfortunately, the legal system ia skewed towards women having more parental rigbts. Those inequalities help feed the fire of vile and vitriolic speech espoused by mothers that could work iut split custody arrangements amicably with their ex-partners. I think that a large percentage of these mothers do not do this because they can make their ex-partners suffer, be subservient and in a way force them into servitude financially and mentally - all to force undue suffering from their on vendettas and insecurities.
Uh applause to you however I not once ever said it was okay what she was doing or said she should spend it on herself.. I am saying once that money is direct deposited, if she already has money of her own then who's to judge that the 20 she used for beer and cigs was money from the father, when it could easily be her 20 from her own money in her account. There's no one that is going to sit down and watch her every transaction.. so can he do anything about it now? No... can he if she was to get a dui or a posession charge then yes.. I take care of my 2 children so I could care less. Legally yes what she is doing is wrong. But there is more important things they would focus on besides this. Just as people continue to abuse food stamps in exchange for drug money.. they can't really do anything until the receiver of either child support or food stamps does something to require well checks

- "bob" (thanks for the new nickname. Quotes really add to it. I'll start signing off on my routes with "Robert"

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