Santa visits Port Huron
Santa Claus is amazing. He works around the clock to research who's nice and who isn't. Then he organizes all those deliveries worldwide.
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#1 Dec 3, 2010
See, Santa's real!
#2 Jan 10, 2011
Santa has aids and his elves gave it to him, he is dying and there will be no more xmas's ever just a holy day to remeber santa and his elf porn movies
#3 Jan 12, 2011
I need you to help me with my Divorce -- a major sin!
And while you're at it help me with my false prophecies that would have gotten me killed the instant they failed to come true back in old testament days.
Oh, and help me from having the ability to be seen as a vessel to heal people with God's power. In reality my ministry was caught on film by NBC when we did not allow sick people in wheelchairs onto the camera because we knew they were a guarantee of making our ministry look bad since there were no real healings through me. We all know God would never use a Divorced man to do such things, because a Divorced man sets too poor of an example that does not agree with the will of God.
And for God's sake, tell those idiots to stop sacrificing their bodies by HOPPING backwards and falling over saying they are "slain in the spirit" when in reality they are doing it voluntarily under their own power when I scream words like "FIRE" and "TOUCH."
I sure hope God helps my penis shoot semen through nocturnal emission because without my wife I'm going to need it...unless I follow the lead of my friend Paul Crouch at TBN and try to get a secretary to perform oral sex on me...I could always settle out of court to avoid the publicity though...that is IF I have money left after the divorce.
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