Cheaters take 2
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Why

Richmond, IN

#1 Apr 19, 2012
How are people able to hold their heads up and feel justified in openly cheating on their spouses no matter the situation?? This world has gotten so tolerant of cheater's. We see on this site all the stories and some of these families go to church and then live these type of lives. I started this not to get smart answers but to seriously try to understand this.I think any relationship based on cheating will never I say never work!!!! I read something about a couple who made it 65 years and they were asked how they made it this long and they said because marriage takes work and there are problems in a marriage you fix it and dont walk away from it..God gave you that person for a reason and there should be no reason(money, women,men) to break you apart..They also said today's society are the kind who give up and think its easier to find someone else than to work on the relationship their in.. So I guess I just wonder if there are any serious people out there with thoughts not smart comments? How do we as a society get people to see that they should not be looking in another persons yard and stay in our own backyards and keep feeding it with love.. just maybe the divorce rate will drop and our kids will be happier with their parents together and lead more stable lives and have better relationships theirselves..any thoughts???
Goddess

Plainfield, IL

#2 Apr 19, 2012
There are three big no-no's in a marriage. Drinking and drugs, abuse, and cheating. The other stuff does take work, but you can make it work. With our disposable society, many believe it is easier to just toss one marriage aside, and start another. Nevermind, the children or extended family that's involved. I feel that when the chips are down, that's when you come together as a team and fight to win!
heavenly

Richmond, IN

#3 Apr 19, 2012
Any relationship is like a job you have to work at it daily to get the riches it brings. If you dont do your job you lose it.that is what people do with their relationships, especially marriage when they dont wont to do the work they give up..they move on to the next relationship and it fails too,,,I agree with Goddess the cheaters dont care about the people they are hurting and its all about what they want.. They make it way to easy to get divorced today and way to easy to get married as far as that is concerned.. I cant understand why you pledge to love someone in marriage and decide not to fight for that marriage at all costs..these cheaters go to the next family and leave their one and only true family behind.. We as a society should be finding ways to keep families together and the extended family should be a big part of that,,helping to preserve what these couples promised to do...love,honor and cherish one another til death do you part.. so anybody that is cheating that is reading this should think about what they are losing and the hurt and pain they have put on the people they were suppose to love and be there for..no affair or relationship is worth throwing away the person you married just to avoid working on what you joined together before GOD!!!
truth be told

Richmond, IN

#4 Apr 19, 2012
I absolutely agree with all you in this post so far. I think that we as a society just turn a blind eye because its easier. But when this happens to us we wonder why its this way. The churches should be standing up and helping these couples in trouble..Marriages are meant to be forever and they are in the eyes of god!! The one thing the "cheaters" will have to do is answer for it on their judgment day but it dont help the poor kids and other partner living with the hurt. The other thing too is the other man or woman thinks they can replace the other parent and that is sad because they feel the need to take everything even after they got the spouse.I read the topix on the pikes, pitchers, and now that lackey woman aAnd it just is disgusting that people can be so cruel.. I feel for the children and the woman who have been hurt by another woman like that.. But at least the ones hurt can know that if he did it to her he will do it to the other woman at some point.no relationship can be built on an affair and last i dont care what they say..When the new wears off it will hit the adulters in the face and then they will wish they hadn't hurt the spouses they left. and the children will have had all the other people put in their lives and when that dont work they move on to another and another..If they would of put the effort in the relationship they had that they put in the affair and other person the relationships would last that they had in the first place..I have been lucky to have had a man who would never betray me and we had our troubles but we knew life without each other would be worse and to have an affair thrown in i couldnt imagine that and how i would feel. I pray for the hurting and I pray harder for the cheaters to get to church and pray to be forgiven and try and work out your relationships you gave up on and get rid of the cheating and affairs and get back to the one you fell in love with and put that work into your marriages and you will see how much better it is at home again
Fred

Goshen, IN

#5 Apr 19, 2012
Marriage is a 2 way street & most problems are 6 of 1 & 1/2 a dozen of the other. If BOTH spouses are not willing to make it work, the marriage is doomed to failure. I agree, it's too easy to get a divorce today, too easy to 'walk away'(and more importantly, too easy to get married). In some cases, buttinsky family members & outside influences can doom success. Face it folks, some people should never marry each other & some folks should never have children together. Unfortunately it is these children who suffer the consequences of their parent's actions. My only advice is: Before you marry, make sure you can accept your partner AS THEY ARE NOW IN EVERY WAY - because you will never change them & you will be very disappointed with your married life with that person.
Steve

Glenview Nas, IL

#6 Apr 20, 2012
Who cares.....? Why is this an issue....? If someone's cheating has nothing to do with you then let it go.
Wow

Oxford, OH

#7 Apr 20, 2012
There are a few people that get it in Liberty. Never thought I'd see the day. Congrats on a so far good post.
agreed

Richmond, IN

#8 Apr 20, 2012
Steve nobody is making an issue someone is just asking a question an wanting to know why people in society are this way..This is a good post and not bashing people..We should be preserving families and not allowing this type of thing to destroy lives..Cheating, money and alcohol will destroy any marriage and money is the first on the list..When people love their money more than their spouse no marriage will survive..you can always make more money but you cant replace your first wife or children with another family..Men and women both need to think about that because we do this everyday..There is no forgiveness in marriages today and people give up and the one who gives up runs to another or files for divorce because they cant cope with what it takes to make a marriage work and it is cowardly of them..and then you have a man or woman who has started another family thinking it will be better but in reality the divorce rate is higher in second marriages than in first one.so then the ex has to families to support. Any marriage can make it if the couples would just work on them..God will judge us all for our sins and these people can answer to him. we are not to judge on he is. and this point is just a discussion not to hurt anyone from the way it reads.
I agree

Richmond, IN

#9 Apr 29, 2012
I couldnt agree more. Everyone just acts like its not big deal today or its expected or 'it happens'. 65 years ago it wasnt so easy to cheat. With facebook and texting and everything else we have, it almost invites it. It just comes down to those who can resist it and those who dont care.
Goddess

Plainfield, IL

#10 Apr 29, 2012
It seems most of us agree about marriage, but what can society as a whole do about "throw-away" or "starter" marriages?
Average Family Defender

Cincinnati, OH

#11 Apr 29, 2012
To Agreed....Fred was bashing the Buttinsky family. Fred, they re my cousins, you don't know them, so leave them alone or else I'll whip you.
Fred

Delphi, IN

#12 Apr 30, 2012
Average Family Defender wrote:
To Agreed....Fred was bashing the Buttinsky family. Fred, they re my cousins, you don't know them, so leave them alone or else I'll whip you.
I also am distantly related to the Buttinsky's, so we must be family. U know the old saying,'U can pick your friends but not your family'. This being the case, a person might want to take a look @ their intended's family before taking the plunge. Might save alot grief down the road.
huh

Fort Wayne, IN

#13 May 2, 2012
Goddess wrote:
It seems most of us agree about marriage, but what can society as a whole do about "throw-away" or "starter" marriages?
Let's all hook up and have a group hug.
knowing

Richmond, IN

#14 May 2, 2012
Life is hard enough as it is with our economy and throwing in the cheating and etc. only ads problems on top of problems. Being together is a CHOICE it takes TWO to make it work and ONE to ruin it for BOTH.
ROFL

Elkhart, IN

#15 May 3, 2012
Goddess wrote:
There are three big no-no's in a marriage. Drinking and drugs, abuse, and cheating. The other stuff does take work, but you can make it work. With our disposable society, many believe it is easier to just toss one marriage aside, and start another. Nevermind, the children or extended family that's involved. I feel that when the chips are down, that's when you come together as a team and fight to win!
Ummm...that's four things.

1...2....3....4.

XD
YOU stand CORRECTED

Franklin, OH

#16 May 3, 2012
ROFL wrote:
<quoted text>
Ummm...that's four things.
1...2....3....4.
XD
Based on the usage of commas in the orignial post, it's indeed THREE things. Drinking and drugs were being referred as one thing.
2True

Elkhart, IN

#17 May 9, 2012
YOU stand CORRECTED wrote:
<quoted text>
Based on the usage of commas in the orignial post, it's indeed THREE things. Drinking and drugs were being referred as one thing.
Actually, despite the use of commas, it is still 4 things given that the word "and" was used. Drinking "and" drugs = 2. Just like if I said "You and I", that doesn't mean that we are collectively one thing. We're still two separate entities entirely.

:)
Lalalaaa

Cleveland, OH

#18 May 9, 2012
Goddess wrote:
There are three big no-no's in a marriage. Drinking and drugs, abuse, and cheating.
You didn't even make a complete sentence! It should be: "There are four big no-nos in a marriage: cheating, abuse, drinking and drugs."

Pleeeeeeease for the love of all that is Holy in this world, PLEASE go back to high school and have Mr. Starr whip some damn sense into you.
fyi

Richmond, IN

#19 May 10, 2012
Lalalaaa wrote:
<quoted text>
You didn't even make a complete sentence! It should be: "There are four big no-nos in a marriage: cheating, abuse, drinking and drugs."
Pleeeeeeease for the love of all that is Holy in this world, PLEASE go back to high school and have Mr. Starr whip some damn sense into you.
This is not english class.
FYI

Tennyson, TX

#20 May 11, 2012
Mr. Starr no longer teaches at UCHS.

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