Letting adult children make misstakes
Tommy Toolman

Hindman, KY

#21 Aug 22, 2013
Reality wrote:
<quoted text>
Just a woman that is dissatisfied with her life, she has to push it off on to others. Misery loves company.
Bet I could put the twinkle back in her eyes. It may take a few hours but I'd get the job done.
Seriously

Lexington, KY

#22 Aug 22, 2013
I would take a gun to my head before I took advice from any of the trash on this board. Just take a look at the subjects on the main page will tell you about the degenerates that post here. If your daughter needs an attorney, detox, or drugs you have come to the right place.
Tommy Toolman wrote:
<quoted text>
This is free advice and as good as you'll get anywhere. Do you have any problems we can help out with?
Reality

Lexington, KY

#23 Aug 22, 2013
Seriously wrote:
<quoted text> It happens - people get swept off their feet. They may not stay swept off their feet, but at least they felt that way for awhile.
Yes, the illusion of happiness.

Since: Jan 13

Lexington, KY

#24 Aug 22, 2013
Concerned mother wrote:
<quoted text> You are making my point for me. There are plenty of attractive guys out there with good jobs that are "nice". Why settle for someone who is unattractive and has nothing to offer because he's nice. I guess she's afraid to give him up because she's afraid she won't find someone else who is more attractive and a little "nicer"?
I've spent 25 years with a man because he was "nice" and good to my children. He was more like a friend than anything. I regret I let those years go by and settle for someone because they were "nice" and good to my kids. I'm still with him, but he is more like a friend and roommate to me than anything. I wish I would have waited to find my "soul mate" (if soul mates really exist). I settled for nothing special when I wanted something wonderful. "I don't know what I wanted but I knew I wanted more - someone smooth, presentable to blend with my décor" (Lyrics to a Carly Simon song on her "No Secrets" album from around 1972.)
You are her mother of course you are going to want her to have something more but also on that note you need to respect her choices and allow her to make mistakes, that's how we grow and learn. You can talk to your daughter about her choices ask her if she is happy and if she is you will need to respect that you don't have to agree or be happy about it. Truth of the matter is that just because you don't feel he is offering her anything she cant get on her own maybe she feels differently. Just because you feel like you settled doesn't mean you should project your feelings onto her relationship.
Concerned mother

Ashland, KY

#25 Aug 22, 2013
Tommy Toolman wrote:
He may not be a handyman around the house, maybe the bedroom is where all his work is done, and I bet he's got the tool that takes care of your daughter. Why do you think she hasn't ran him off? Are you jealous he's not using that tool on you? Now tell us the truth, you know you're needing a good roll in the hay.
As for the vasectomy, did you ever think that maybe it can be reversed?
I knew the people that like to use "off color" or vulgar comments would be showing up on here. There are a bunch of those that like to use "off color" or vulgar comments. That's why many people won't get on Topix. However, I have found that there are some really nice, concerned, empathic, intelligent people on Topix as well that enlighten me with their comments. You are obviously not one of these people. I shouldn't even respond to you - but I will.

My daughter is obviously not very physically attracted to this guy and that is where sexual desire begins. I may be an old woman, but I still know a handsome, desirable man when I see them whether they are in their 30's or in their 60's. One thing I know for sure - this guy is not attractive. I've had relations before with men that I liked but didn't find attractive. It's settling for less when you do this. Having "a tool" is no incentive - most all men have them. I may seem desperate at my age, but I wouldn't touch this guy with a 9 foot pole even if he's well endowed with "his tool". He probably has to roll back the layers of fat on his belly "to even find his tool".

As for the vasectomy being reversed - that costs thousands of dollars that this guy doesn't have. He didn't want more children back when he had it and probably doesn't want more today. Also, there is no guarantee that a vasectomy can be reversed successfully - I think the odds of a vasectomy being reversed are small.
Concerned mother

Ashland, KY

#26 Aug 22, 2013
Reality wrote:
<quoted text>
Just a woman that is dissatisfied with her life, she has to push it off on to others. Misery loves company.
Yes, I am dissatisfied with my life. I am not trying to seek company in my misery. I just don't want my daughter to look back when she is 60 and have all the regrets I have. Not meeting the right person for me is one of my biggest regrets.
Reality

Lexington, KY

#27 Aug 22, 2013
Concerned mother wrote:
<quoted text> Yes, I am dissatisfied with my life. I am not trying to seek company in my misery. I just don't want my daughter to look back when she is 60 and have all the regrets I have. Not meeting the right person for me is one of my biggest regrets.
That's life. We all have regrets of some sort. Cut the apron strings and let your daughter live her life the ways she wants. Life would not be life without a few disappointments.
Tommy Toolman

Hindman, KY

#28 Aug 22, 2013
Concerned mother wrote:
<quoted text> I knew the people that like to use "off color" or vulgar comments would be showing up on here. There are a bunch of those that like to use "off color" or vulgar comments. That's why many people won't get on Topix. However, I have found that there are some really nice, concerned, empathic, intelligent people on Topix as well that enlighten me with their comments. You are obviously not one of these people. I shouldn't even respond to you - but I will.
My daughter is obviously not very physically attracted to this guy and that is where sexual desire begins. I may be an old woman, but I still know a handsome, desirable man when I see them whether they are in their 30's or in their 60's. One thing I know for sure - this guy is not attractive. I've had relations before with men that I liked but didn't find attractive. It's settling for less when you do this. Having "a tool" is no incentive - most all men have them. I may seem desperate at my age, but I wouldn't touch this guy with a 9 foot pole even if he's well endowed with "his tool". He probably has to roll back the layers of fat on his belly "to even find his tool".
As for the vasectomy being reversed - that costs thousands of dollars that this guy doesn't have. He didn't want more children back when he had it and probably doesn't want more today. Also, there is no guarantee that a vasectomy can be reversed successfully - I think the odds of a vasectomy being reversed are small.
Now tell us the truth, you know you started this thread so someone would come along and feed you your fill of "off color" comments. You like it and you know it, and I also know it.

When was the last time you had that twinkle in your eyes? I'd bet it has been tooo long.
Concerned mother

Ashland, KY

#29 Aug 22, 2013
Tommy Toolman wrote:
<quoted text>
Now tell us the truth, you know you started this thread so someone would come along and feed you your fill of "off color" comments. You like it and you know it, and I also know it.
When was the last time you had that twinkle in your eyes? I'd bet it has been tooo long.
I really didn't want "off color" comments, but I knew I would get them. "Off Color" comments don't bother me that much, I've been around people in my life from all walks of life and have heard many "off color" or vulgar remarks. I'm old, but I'm no prude. As a matter of fact, you are right - I haven't had any twinkle in my eyes for a very long time.
Tony

Lexington, KY

#30 Aug 22, 2013
The fact that you come to this site and ask advice about important family issues leads me to believe that you are too stupid to ever raise children. The average IQ on this board is way less than a 100 and the rest are druggies and perverts, so good luck with any advice from topix users.
Concerned mother wrote:
<quoted text> I really didn't want "off color" comments, but I knew I would get them. "Off Color" comments don't bother me that much, I've been around people in my life from all walks of life and have heard many "off color" or vulgar remarks. I'm old, but I'm no prude. As a matter of fact, you are right - I haven't had any twinkle in my eyes for a very long time.
Honesty

Jasper, IN

#31 Aug 22, 2013
did it ever occur to you that they may love one another?both partners are not always good looking. if your little granddaughter gets fat, are you going to stop loving her too? I think your problem is with your own weight, I think you need to work on that because as far as I see it, your daughter don't have a problem. You do!
They Sure Do

Henderson, KY

#32 Aug 22, 2013
Tony wrote:
The fact that you come to this site and ask advice about important family issues leads me to believe that you are too stupid to ever raise children. The average IQ on this board is way less than a 100 and the rest are druggies and perverts, so good luck with any advice from topix users.
<quoted text>
I may be part of the low IQ because I find myself pretty uneducated at a lot of things sometimes as we all do but just what catagorie would you be part of?Damn topic users!!
marci

Richmond, KY

#33 Aug 22, 2013
She hasn't MARRIED him, has she? If not, maybe he's
just "Mr. Right Now" instead of "Mr. Right". I think you have some valid concerns, but in my experience, the more a parent preaches against something , the more a child, even an adult child, will go after that thing. Just bide your time and chances are good that the relationship will run its course and she will start to date someone more to your liking.
Tony

Lexington, KY

#34 Aug 22, 2013
catagorie--REALLY?
They Sure Do wrote:
<quoted text>I may be part of the low IQ because I find myself pretty uneducated at a lot of things sometimes as we all do but just what catagorie would you be part of?Damn topic users!!
They Sure Do

Henderson, KY

#35 Aug 22, 2013
Done just to see if your IQ is in check.Jokes on you and you fell for.What catagory would that put you in again????
What

Henderson, KY

#36 Aug 22, 2013
Wow, sounds like this fat guy should run away now. Who wants to inherit this monster in law. The daughter wants another kid but keeps banging a guy with no seed? Makes no sense.

You people are all insane and should head to Springer soon. I'm guessing mom is really wanting to make a kid with this guy.
They Sure Do

Henderson, KY

#37 Aug 22, 2013
Agrea I mean agrii I mean agree with you there What.Make you double dose on your blood pressure meds!
Tony

Lexington, KY

#38 Aug 22, 2013
I won't even mention your third grade grammar.
They Sure Do wrote:
<quoted text>I may be part of the low IQ because I find myself pretty uneducated at a lot of things sometimes as we all do but just what catagorie would you be part of?Damn topic users!!
SRAH

Huntington, IN

#39 Aug 22, 2013
Tony wrote:
The fact that you come to this site and ask advice about important family issues leads me to believe that you are too stupid to ever raise children. The average IQ on this board is way less than a 100 and the rest are druggies and perverts, so good luck with any advice from topix users.
<quoted text>
So Tony, I guess that is why YOU are on Topix.
HILLBILLY LUNATIC

Huntington, IN

#40 Aug 22, 2013
It sounds like neither one of these people should even be considering bringing more children into an already screwed up mess. Most 20 and 30 somethings don't have a clue about raising kids anyway. Just take a look around. Most children and teens today are rude, disrespectful, and so mother-smothered that it is sickening. I say thank GOD for vasectomies! Why add to the problem?

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