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1 - 12 of 12 Comments Last updated Jun 13, 2014
concerned netcong mom

Lake Hopatcong, NJ

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#1
Jun 9, 2014
 
So since the weather has been nice and the kids have been able to play on the playground after school I have noticed some things that concern me and figured I would put it out there and see how other people feel.
First I have observed that kids are allowed to play on the playground unsupervised (without a parent present) after school at the ages of 4th grade and up .. I personally don't think this is safe. I have witnessed and talked to the principal about the fighting, choking, bullying etc .. I was told that if the kids did anything wrong they would be asked to leave and told they could not hang out there after school, however I have brought it to his attention twice after having to break up numerous fights, stopping a kid ( who was turning blue) from being cchoked , another child from having his head slammed into the ground and other kids getting punched. I have looked around for the parents only to realize they were there alone . I feel this is unexceptional and very dangerous.. Fourth grade kids are way too young to be left unsupervised for hours at a time especially if they are going to be hurting and bullying other kids ( younger children as well ( any thoughts ???
concerned netcong mom

Lake Hopatcong, NJ

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#2
Jun 9, 2014
 
*unexceptable*
Understand your concern

Morristown, NJ

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#4
Jun 10, 2014
 
I understand your concern and have heard similar stories. The reality of the situation, is that school playgrounds are public property paid for and maintained by the money of the tax payers therefore, the children have the right to be there. The school can impose a no trespassing after dark or after the hours of......, etc. However, if the parents are not willing to watch their children after school and you feel they are harming other children due to the lack of supervision, the next time you observe this behavior you should call the police. I don't think there is any responsibility on the school. I could be wrong and please do not hold me to it, but I am pretty sure this is correct.

Since: Jun 14

Newark, NJ

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#5
Jun 10, 2014
 
I hear what you're saying , but I can't help but think something bad is going to happen and there isn't going to be a parent there to help.. when it comes down to it if all ppl are thinking/saying is " it's allowed, not against any law" how much is that going to matter when a child is seriously hurt. Are the parents of that child really going to care that it was "allowed".. just today I saw about 5 or 6 kids piled on too of one child, another child punched in the face and left with a brused eye, one of the parents was there other wise that could have been much worse .. the principal said to me twice , if a kid/kids are complained about or not behaving they will be told they can't come back but I personally have told him of two incidents and nothing going has been done.. I'm just looking at this as a concerned parent, my child and other children can't have fun and play like they should be able to bc of other kids being aggressive bullies .. it just doesn't seem right or fair to me..
Maybe you're right , maybe I should call the police , I just feel like it's a parent/school issue, but that's just my opinion
]
Come on parents

Flanders, NJ

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#6
Jun 10, 2014
 

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Parents need to be accountable for their own children. If I were there with a child and I saw this I would seek out those parents not supervising their kids (with the help of other concerned parents) and explain how inappropriate it is for their kids to behave that way. The school shouldn't be responsible. Parents are responsible.

Since: Jun 14

Lake Hopatcong, NJ

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#7
Jun 10, 2014
 
Come on parents wrote:
Parents need to be accountable for their own children. If I were there with a child and I saw this I would seek out those parents not supervising their kids (with the help of other concerned parents) and explain how inappropriate it is for their kids to behave that way. The school shouldn't be responsible. Parents are responsible.
I definitely agree with you !! I guess the issue is the parents are no where to be found .. I am going to call the police department because I want to know what the actual laws are .. knowing what I see I could NEVER let my child ever be there alone EVER!
concerned netcong mom 2

Randolph, NJ

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#8
Jun 11, 2014
 
I have also witnessed the chaos that takes place after school hours, and I've brought this to mr Carroll's attention several times and he has said: "if a child is 11 years of age or older, they are technically allowed to be home alone". In my opinion, That was a terrible comparison, because when a child is left home alone, that child's parent has rules in place and the responsibility of that child solely falls onto that parent and no one else.

Being a mom who at times has to wait after school for some of my older kids to be done with their after school activities, i'm always at the playground with my younger kids; who enjoy and look forward to playing their friends on the play ground.

Lately It's become real hard for me to allow my kids to play on certain sides of the playground due to all the rough aggressive behavior and at times I don't even want to be there, because of how exhausting it gets to always monitor what's going. I feel it's my job and responsibility as a parent to stop a child from hurting or assaulted another child, especially if that parent isn't there. It's hard not to get involved, but these are kids (our kids) I feel it's a duty to be one another's eyes and ears when one of us isn't there. I've been told not to even go on the playground and I should wait in my car so I don't have to see what's going on and This way I won't feel responsible. In my opinion, that would make me no different then the school, and I would also be showing negligence.

I will say Once in a while mr Carroll has come out from his office to tell the kids to "get out of the tree" or to address other issues, but it's not consistent reinforcement.

It is public property to everyone until they do something horrible that can get them-self banned. As a parent I think that's ridiculous, something should be done now. Why does something bad always need to happen before rules and laws get put into place??? I feel A simple rule can be put in place, for example: after 3:30 all children under the age of 13 must be accompanied by an adult. If we can enforce such rules like "no trespassing after dark" or "no animals allowed"; rules that are implemented for safety reasons, why can't it be said that parental supervision is a must if a child is under a certain age?

Make no mistake about it,(as parent the parent of a child who has been bullied in this school) I do know that the school is still responsible even if it is after school hours, that if two students are involved in any incident. It's the schools responsibility to take some action and or report it to the proper authorities to see that they enforce the proper action.

We all live in a very small close-knit town; this "our" playground. none of us want to see any child get hurt or be a victim to bullying or any kind of assault. I think it should be up to us, to see that a new rule gets put in place for all of our kids safety.
Come on parents

Brooklyn, NY

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#10
Jun 11, 2014
 

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Mom2

I don't disagree with everything you said. Parents need to be responsible for their OWN kids. Fact is, a parent that doesn't care enough to monitor their own child is simply a parent that will blame you if you address their kid. Mr. Carroll has much better things to do than monitor the kids who have parents that don't monitor them. I for one disagree with this law say I g the school has to handle bullying issues that occur even outside school hours and off school property. That's just another way for this useless government to take responsibility away from the parents. There is no reason for that to be part of the law. If your kid is bullied outside of school, handle your own issues. Granted, it would be nice if we lived in a time again like when we were younger and parents had each others backs and helped out. But, have you seen or heard some of these parents?
eggplant parm

Landing, NJ

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#11
Jun 11, 2014
 
Close the playground down! Let the kids sit in front of the TV, computers, cell phones, ipads, etc,etc~

Since: Jun 14

Lake Hopatcong, NJ

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#12
Jun 11, 2014
 
Bottom line most of these kids are too young to be unsupervised and their parents need to step up and be responsible .. they are not old enough to monitor themselves .. I would never let my child be there alone with out me , he's too young and there are too many bad things, accidents, bullying that happen .. Ifor I'm being honest idk what age I think it would be appropriate for a child to be on the playground alone, maybe it depends on the child but the kids I have witnessed are way to young and someone is going to get hurt. Most likely it's going to be a kid that is there not supervised on a day where either there is no adults/parents there or adults /parents that don't or won't get involved .. it's sad to me that nothing is being done to stop this situation .. but as a mom I just couldn't sleep at night if I sat idoly *sp* by and did nothing when a child was being hurt .. I spoke to a friend of mine who happens to be an attorney and she said something to the fact that what is going on is assault and it's negligence on the schools part ( those were not her exact words verbatim but that was the jist .. I just hope no child has to get seriously hurt b4 something is done whe there it's a parent or the school
Concerned Netcong mom 2

Randolph, NJ

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#13
Jun 12, 2014
 
Oh my goodness, don't get me started with the parents!! A few weeks I confronted a parent to let them know I witnessed their child riding their bike without a helmet. I honestly thought the kid was taking off his helmet when his mom was out of site. You wouldn't believe the response I got,( I hope your sitting) "I told my son to at least let me see him wear it when he leaves the house, what he does when he's out, is on him". " he'll have to learn the hard way" I just walked away, because I couldn't believe that was her response. Sadly, she'll be the one learning the hard way when her kid gets hurt. Ugh!!!!

I don't know that it's necessarily a law, rather than the school is just obligated to know. My son had several issues with his bully off school property and school hours and the police would always say "did you contact the school" at one point I felt I wasn't getting anywhere with my sons bully situation, so I called DYFS and they too said that the school regardless needs to be notified. I guess it's more so that they are aware or on top of situations especially of it's between the same two students.

Yes, parents need to be responsible for their own child, I completely agree! But it's very hard for me to turn a blind eye to what's been going on. My son told me that his classmate ( who punched my son in the face) was going to tell his mom on ME! Just Because I yelled at this kid to take his hands off my son. I told him that he should tell his mom on me and to also let her know that this altercation between me and a third grader could've been avoided if her son was supervised.

I think more can be done, I agree mr Carroll does have more important things to worry about. But I too feel he should be more concerned, after numerous complaints from parents, his "there's nothing i can do" responses aren't very helpful. At the very least tell me what more I can do or who else should be complaining too.
Support Our Students

Bayonne, NJ

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#14
Jun 13, 2014
 
Concerned Netcong mom 2 wrote:
Oh my goodness, don't get me started with the parents!! A few weeks I confronted a parent to let them know I witnessed their child riding their bike without a helmet. I honestly thought the kid was taking off his helmet when his mom was out of site. You wouldn't believe the response I got,( I hope your sitting) "I told my son to at least let me see him wear it when he leaves the house, what he does when he's out, is on him". " he'll have to learn the hard way" I just walked away, because I couldn't believe that was her response. Sadly, she'll be the one learning the hard way when her kid gets hurt. Ugh!!!!
I don't know that it's necessarily a law, rather than the school is just obligated to know. My son had several issues with his bully off school property and school hours and the police would always say "did you contact the school" at one point I felt I wasn't getting anywhere with my sons bully situation, so I called DYFS and they too said that the school regardless needs to be notified. I guess it's more so that they are aware or on top of situations especially of it's between the same two students.
Yes, parents need to be responsible for their own child, I completely agree! But it's very hard for me to turn a blind eye to what's been going on. My son told me that his classmate ( who punched my son in the face) was going to tell his mom on ME! Just Because I yelled at this kid to take his hands off my son. I told him that he should tell his mom on me and to also let her know that this altercation between me and a third grader could've been avoided if her son was supervised.
I think more can be done, I agree mr Carroll does have more important things to worry about. But I too feel he should be more concerned, after numerous complaints from parents, his "there's nothing i can do" responses aren't very helpful. At the very least tell me what more I can do or who else should be complaining too.
It will be a problem for Mr. Carroll and the school when someone gets hurt or sues for harassment, intimidation, and bullying. They need supervision before and after school.

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