my wife hates my kids from my previou...
wow really

United States

#21 Aug 12, 2011
Lubbock Man wrote:
"Quit Multiplying" How can you tell someone that having babies is the problem. How is he to know that his first marriage wasn't going to work out, no one can tell the future he is just living his life. All he is asking for his help with his 2nd wife because he thinks she doesn't like its kids from his first marriage. When it comes right down to it the problem is not with the kids but his 2nd wife she needs to get over whatever her deal is and respect his kids, he cannot do anything to help her change her mind it is all up to her she needs to be the bigger person and help take care of his kids, now I'm not saying that's her job or anything like that with a marriage and if their is kids involved from past relationships or marriage you have to know what you're getting into. I'm planning to get married in Dec and my future wife has a kid from the past and I have a kid from my first marriage but she loves my kid as much as I love hers. The only thing you can do right now is talk to your wife and try to get the bottom of what her real problem is because no matter what she says there is a problem, its not with you or your kids its with her. Best of Luck.
100% agree with you uu said itt all

Since: May 11

Dallas, TX

#22 Aug 16, 2011
Get rid of that Bitch your kids will always be yours & she only for a while
ok Lamesa

Broken Bow, OK

#23 Oct 23, 2011
one question??? does her ex see her kid??? if not there is ur answer,she hates that his is not part of her kid life. and she sees u area great father to urs. still u had ur kids first. now u can get remarried but u cant never ever replace ur kids...u can never have anothe lets say jamie,joanna, theres never another blue print that u can make the same kid. if u dont put a stop to it now , one day ur kids are gonna throw it in ur face and might even hate u...my husband hates his mother for that one reason..
some girl

Fate, TX

#24 Dec 21, 2011
I can relate to this I'm 25 yrs old& my dad remarried when I was 11. His wife hated us cuz she thought my dad still loved my mom. Even though my mom was remarried. She formed a wedge between us& made him make a choice.@ 11 my dad made his choice. They r still married& have had other kids. We don't exist in his life& he hasn't talked to me& my siblings since. It's sad but don't let it happen to u. Ur kids should always b first& if she knew u had kids already she should respect that. That's ur past& if she respects u. She will keep if that way. Never turn ur back on ur kids 4 anyone. I hate my dad & he doesn't even kno his grandchildren. I hope u make the right choice!
i knw

United States

#25 Dec 21, 2011
I understand 100% how ur wife feels I have 2 step kids I dnt hate them but I do hate how they act there very disrespectful.and when there w us they r constantly calling there mom and giving her a play by play of everything me and my husband say 2 each other then there mother.tries 2 talk 2 my husband every chance she can and no has nothing 2 do w t kids me and my husband have 3 children together and when we first got together my husband would push our kids 2 t side for them I spoke 2 him bout this and told him if my kids weren't gonna matter when they were around that I would leave well he started being there for our kids when they were there well all hell broke loose his ex started telling every1 how horrible a father he was and that her children should come first well he decided 2 avoid t drama by staying away and she blames me for it oh well I dnt really care I jst wish she didn't think her kids should b t only 1s who matter so they can start seeing there father
Gavryl

Vermont, Australia

#26 Apr 17, 2012
if you love your wife then you should talk to her calmly and explain to her in a nice way that they're your kids you have responsibility to them but I don't agree when someone said that kids should come first if your happy with your wife now then she should come first your kids is always gonna be there it's not bieng shellfish but you don't want to be meserable for the rest of your life... you also need to enjoy life while were still alive, kids doesn't bring happiness all the time they bring trouble sometimes but you need someone who cares about you take care of you to share life and adventure if you choose your kids you cannot experience real life when they grow up they're gonna be living with they're and you stock alone in life and do you think that theyre gonna say dad his gonna die alone kids are un great full most of them
whaaa

Dallas, TX

#27 Apr 17, 2012
Wow. You must have horrible kids. If your kids are ungrateful then talk to your wife. But it seems like your wife already made up her mind so you make up yours. I can tell you this, you treat your kids like cra p and you allow your new wife to do the same then don't expect your kids to be there for you when you need them. They will grow up and live there lives just like you are living yours and if they exclude you from their life you only have yourself to blame. Js
I knw

United States

#28 Apr 17, 2012
I kinda agree w gavryl if ur happy dnt let ur kids ruin ur happiness cuz when ur kids grow up do u think there gonna care if u like who they date or not NO there not there gonna do there own thing live there own lives dont neglect ur kids but dnt let them b the only thing that matters every1 of ur kids should b treated equal and ur new wife should feel like she is a priority in ur life not like shes second u have a new fam dnt push them away cuz of ur other children jst sayin
benthere

Dallas, TX

#29 Apr 17, 2012
My dad is ill. Do i gaf? No, we were little when he remarried and she hated us. Everything revolved around her new family and her kids from her previous marriage. You are right we did move on. We had young pregnancy. My brother was always in trouble but no one but my poor mom cared becuz SHE didn't like us. She left my dad later on, we didnt see him by this point becuz she would make false accusations and in all honesty we just didnt care about him anymore. My mother is my world, i see every other weekend buy call her everyday. My dad reached out to us for moral support becuz he is sick. God forgives and i am not God. I wish him well on his recovery but you are right. I could care less if he died tomorrow. I would never do that to my son. I love him and want to be a part of his life. Good luck in whatever you do. Its not an easy choice, but i find that most men find it easy to walk away and start over instead of working on the problem. Find out what the problem is.
I knw

United States

#30 Apr 17, 2012
My goodness dnt blame ur choices on ur dad not being there yall did that on yalls own my dad was never there either but damn i dnt blame t bad choices i made in life on him and niether does my sis grow up ur obviously not over it cuz ur still complaining
benthere

Dallas, TX

#31 Apr 17, 2012
I am not complaining you dummy. I dont blame him for our bad choices, those were our choices. Im just saying that he shouldn't be trying to reach out to us like a lil b.tch now that we are all grown up. My siblings made bad choices, i never said i did. I think if my dad would have been around to guide them it might have been different. But he made his choice now quit your crying cuz we dont wanna hear it. This man wants to choose his wife thats fine. It is his choice. But dont forget that
You made those kids too and you do have a responsability to them until they reach there age.
Sure

United States

#32 Apr 19, 2012
You ppl make me sick!!! This man said his WIFE hates his kids! Not his kids hate his wife. I'm sorry but in your kids eyes..you are the world to them. They should ALWAYS come first in yours!!! Any real parent knows that. If you're not one...step back. Your Kids will NOT ruin your happiness, if she loves you she needs to love them too!! You ppl think kids are forever. There not! They leave too if you hurt them, they're only human! They're minds don't function like adults. It's her you need to have a talk with...not them!! Kids are kids. Don't hurt their little hearts just so you can make a grown woman feel better...!!
Sure

United States

#33 Apr 19, 2012
Oh && all that crap about kids not bringing happiness!! Sweety what world are you living in?! Babies are miracles! && WE are the ones who make them they didn't ask to come here && live in a place full of ppl like you, even worse. A grown woman should never compare herself to a child because being without them always.. i'm sorry if i were this guy i'd be hella happy to see them too!! She lives with him && sees him EVERYDAY!!!! He loves her. But what about his other babies?! They probably resent her && the other kids too because they get to see their daddy everyday!! If he wants to treat them like they are his world when they are around? Let him, because the other kids get that same treatment except every single day! Give them a break ppl.
Pink

Levelland, TX

#34 Apr 19, 2012
To needing help: I think what your wife wants is for you to get rid of your kids from the previous marriage and make her kids and the ones she has with you and her first priority. Don't change for anybody. Women men there everywhere ha. They can be replaced your kids can't . You shouldn't even give it a second thought. She is the one that needs to go. She loves you she's goin to love you and all your packaged deal which are those kids that were there before she came along if not she's not worth it. You say you are scared to lose your other kids if y'all divorce but they will always be your kids and there is always custody and visitation its not the end of the world for you. But you putting there stepmom first feels like the end of the world to those kids. You need to move on with your kids and if the right woman comes along in time so be it. Take care of your kids and don't worry in rushing in trying to find them a stepmom. No one should put their kids aside for a new romance screw that. I no I wouldn't . I care about what my kids think . Someone mentioned don't let your kids from keeping you to be happy. Well theres a difference from your new spouse treating them like crap and your kids treating her like crap. Your kids should make you happy they should be all you need right now especially if there young. If a woman comes along that absolutely adores your kids and accepts you as is then you'll know she's the right one. But no need to go out searching if was meant to be it will happen when you least expect it . Hope all ends well with your situation you sound like a good dad.
On you

United States

#35 Apr 19, 2012
Basically wht every1 is telling u is drop ur wife drop t kids u have w her cuz if u split ur gonna see them less or not at all but ur focus should b on ur first kids cuz there t only 1s that matter. Look t choice is up 2 u cuz no1 one here is gonna help u pay ur child support or help u see ur kids so its on u 2 make this wrk or not cuz if u split ur showing who matters more its not bout ur wife but about t precious children u have w her think of them 2 every1 seems more focused on ur other children but thats jst my advice best wishes!
wth

United States

#36 Apr 19, 2012
I guess you only read part of it. I read that ppl are saying "if she really loves you then she should accept you and your kids". I never read anything about discarding the second set, but you know what.... I bet the wife would hate it if you did the same to her kids. I hope he doesn't take the easy way out and forget about his first kids. I hope he gets to keep his wife too, but someone that honestly loves you wouldn't make you choose. Put your foot down and man up. Fulfill your obligations as a father to both sets of kids.
ripped in 2

Providence, RI

#37 Jul 31, 2012
my wife has 2 boys from diff men and 1 with me we have been together for 8 yrs 1 have 2 from a pre marriage she never liked my kids and i had to play ref when they came over to visit she was very mean to them emotionly my kids were always nice to her no matter what she would never give them the time of day i told them it didnt matter because im there dad and i love them her 2 boys stole lots of money and other things from me and she would get mad at me if i said anything to them and she would do nothing about it after years of this i finally told her to go now im the biggest ass in the world and everything is my fault so tiried i feel really bad i love my wife but i love my kids more how do i know im making the right decission?
On you

United States

#38 Jul 31, 2012
If there really as bad as u say then u made t right choice i personally have 2 step kids and 1 from a previous relationship and 3 w my husband but i have taught my kids 2 respect every1 my step kids on t other hand i cant stand how they act they think there t center of t universe and when they come round my husband ignores our children for fear of hurting there mother and them but it hurts me cuz me or my childrens feeling dnt matter when there round and my husbands ex acts like shes still married 2 him even though shes married 2 some1 else and my husband allows this i use 2 argue about it but now have given up i figure nothing will change so t best thing 2 do is leave i feel if u tried ur best and knw in ur heart u gave it all u had then its not ur fault but its t other persons and they ethier need 2 help make it wrk or it jst wont when its only 1 sided so i feel u did t right thing and gd luck
seen

United States

#39 Jul 31, 2012
She needs help, you did make the right choice. If your kids did nothing wrong and although she was mean to them, your kids still respected her?? She will never accept your kids. No matter how hard you try, your kids are a reminder that you were with someone else first. Her kids, hmmm, well poor babies... They have no one but her. To love someone is to love all of them, not just part of them. Your kids are part of you, stand your ground and good luck.
DMSR

United States

#40 Jul 31, 2012
Kids are a great part of your life but if your so called wife doesnt accept them then move on. There is a massive or should I say a world full of women who do care. Life is too short to be stuck on one woman who doesnt care for your kids just ask yourself this simple and honest question was I happy before she came in thw picture? I bet you might have been I know I was so just move on lifes too short I do LOVE my girlfriend but there is more women out there bro so move on and keep your head up high.

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