child support court
help

Salem, VA

#1 Aug 16, 2012
Can anyone that has had experience in dealing with child support enforcement please tell me your experience.
Here is my situation. I am trying to help a friend. He is currently incarcerated in Sullivan Co for not paying.(yes I know he should have paid). He has been in jail since early June and the judge told him to bond out. When he tried to go through a bondsman they can't help because of 2 other holds in neighboring counties. When he goes back to court he will have been in jail for more than 90 days. He has not been given a sentence or a release date.
He has told me that some other people in jail with him have had people calling the child support people and all of a sudden, like magic, they get released. One was even released before his sentence was up.
I don't understand. He can't pay if he is in jail and even his kid's mom wants him out because he was babysitting for her and saving her money.
If any of you have dealt with a situation like this, PLEASE, give me some ideas on what to do to help.
If you are going to be a troll and tell me he's a deadbeat dad and whatnot, just save your energy. He knows what he has done wrong and wants a chance to fix it. But how do you do that if you can't see the light of day?
Just saying

Nickelsville, VA

#2 Aug 18, 2012
Lesson learned hope he doesn't go back to jail when he get out!

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#3 Aug 21, 2012
He hasn't had his court date yet. He can't get out unless he bonds out. It has nothing to do with child support right now. He will get a sentence once his court date comes.
joke

United States

#4 Aug 22, 2012
The whole system is a joke and the best thing to do is stay out of it if at all possible!! I received child care assistance through the state while I went to college and worked so I had to agree to "cooperate with child support" in return. I didn't have a choice, but if I did then I would've picked option B!

I have two children - one with an ex and one with my current boyfriend of over 8 years. The ex owed thousands in child support and they never did anything to him. My current boyfriend and I had to go for the child we have together (even though we lived together and he paid for everything) and the judge threw him in jail because she said he had been served and hadn't shown up for court in the past. He didn't owe one single red cent in child support. The officer had taken the papers to his old address and left them with a relative which is what they considered served...

I'm not a lawyer or a judge...I only have a bachelors degree...so maybe that's why I think its stupid to let a deadbeat who owes thousands go free, but put a guy who doesn't owe a dime and has the family living with him in jail...

It took awhile, but I finally spoke to someone with some sense and got them to see how dumb it was that I was taking my own child support payments to the post office! He would literally give me the money and I would go get a money order and send it to nashville so they could process it and send it back as "child support." I also paid the 100 dollars to get him out of jail so I don't know how they thought that would benefit me or our child..

The lawyer who "represents" the custodial parents is hateful as all hell too. She gets onto the deadbeats which is good, but she's in no way nice to the mothers. I just thank god I don't have to deal with that mess anymore. It was something I had to do to get the help I needed to get through school, but they don't consider individual cases when applying the rules. I guess it would be hard to though since there are SO MANY deadbeat losers piled up on their desks.

Anyway, your friend might see people getting released because they get someone to make a large payment on what they owe. I know of a guy who got put in jail and they told him he could get out if he paid like 1500 dollars. Its amazing how many guys can't come up with the money to make a 300 dollar child support payment, but can come up with 2 grand overnight when they get put in jail!
Blank

Big Stone Gap, VA

#5 Aug 23, 2012
joke wrote:
The whole system is a joke and the best thing to do is stay out of it if at all possible!! I received child care assistance through the state while I went to college and worked so I had to agree to "cooperate with child support" in return. I didn't have a choice, but if I did then I would've picked option B!
I have two children - one with an ex and one with my current boyfriend of over 8 years. The ex owed thousands in child support and they never did anything to him. My current boyfriend and I had to go for the child we have together (even though we lived together and he paid for everything) and the judge threw him in jail because she said he had been served and hadn't shown up for court in the past. He didn't owe one single red cent in child support. The officer had taken the papers to his old address and left them with a relative which is what they considered served...
I'm not a lawyer or a judge...I only have a bachelors degree...so maybe that's why I think its stupid to let a deadbeat who owes thousands go free, but put a guy who doesn't owe a dime and has the family living with him in jail...
It took awhile, but I finally spoke to someone with some sense and got them to see how dumb it was that I was taking my own child support payments to the post office! He would literally give me the money and I would go get a money order and send it to nashville so they could process it and send it back as "child support." I also paid the 100 dollars to get him out of jail so I don't know how they thought that would benefit me or our child..
The lawyer who "represents" the custodial parents is hateful as all hell too. She gets onto the deadbeats which is good, but she's in no way nice to the mothers. I just thank god I don't have to deal with that mess anymore. It was something I had to do to get the help I needed to get through school, but they don't consider individual cases when applying the rules. I guess it would be hard to though since there are SO MANY deadbeat losers piled up on their desks.
Anyway, your friend might see people getting released because they get someone to make a large payment on what they owe. I know of a guy who got put in jail and they told him he could get out if he paid like 1500 dollars. Its amazing how many guys can't come up with the money to make a 300 dollar child support payment, but can come up with 2 grand overnight when they get put in jail!
No, what is really "dumb" is that you CHOSE a loser to marry and make a baby with, and then shack up with a boyfriend (no marriage?) and make another one.
marriage

United States

#6 Aug 23, 2012
Not everyone thinks you need to stand before "god" and tell LIES or obtain a marriage certificate in order to live with someone or be a family.

She said she has or had been at the time with the bf for 8 years? And has an education? That's longer than the average marriage lasts and sounds like she is doing well and speaking from a past experience.

I'm sure it is your christian duty to judge though. You just can't help it! Carry on.

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#7 Aug 23, 2012
marriage wrote:
Not everyone thinks you need to stand before "god" and tell LIES or obtain a marriage certificate in order to live with someone or be a family.
She said she has or had been at the time with the bf for 8 years? And has an education? That's longer than the average marriage lasts and sounds like she is doing well and speaking from a past experience.
I'm sure it is your christian duty to judge though. You just can't help it! Carry on.
So obviously religion is your main priority or you wouldn't have been the first person in this entire conversation to bring it up. WTH??? What left field did you fall out of? So you think that every jerk that has an opinion must be a christian? So by default wouldn't that make you a christian...... Stop trolling for religious debates and trying writing something helpful to someone.
MATTER OF FACT

Summerville, GA

#8 Aug 23, 2012
well i have to agree it is usually religious ppl who think u just hafta be married to live together. it is a religious ceremony ya know? it is obvious the poster was implying there is something wrong with "shacking up (no marriage?)and making another one (baby)" not everybody thinks you have 2 get married and especially if you don't have any religious beliefs saying ya need to then why? look how many marriages fail anyway. quit blaming deadbeat fathers on everybody else and make them be accountable! i know plenty of women who have a child or more then 1 child from a previous failed relationship and they have moved on and got remarried or just have another bf. would it be better if they just didnt even try to get child support? should they just never move on with their life? gee i sure do wish i could be perfect like the ppl here on topix and marry my high school sweetheart and stay married forever with my 2.5 kids and a dog with a picket fence! join the real world kid!

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#9 Aug 24, 2012
MATTER OF FACT wrote:
well i have to agree it is usually religious ppl who think u just hafta be married to live together. it is a religious ceremony ya know? it is obvious the poster was implying there is something wrong with "shacking up (no marriage?)and making another one (baby)" not everybody thinks you have 2 get married and especially if you don't have any religious beliefs saying ya need to then why? look how many marriages fail anyway. quit blaming deadbeat fathers on everybody else and make them be accountable! i know plenty of women who have a child or more then 1 child from a previous failed relationship and they have moved on and got remarried or just have another bf. would it be better if they just didnt even try to get child support? should they just never move on with their life? gee i sure do wish i could be perfect like the ppl here on topix and marry my high school sweetheart and stay married forever with my 2.5 kids and a dog with a picket fence! join the real world kid!
I agree that what the first guy said was pretty ignorant but what ticks me off is when people troll for religious debates on here. And also, a marriage is not always a religious ceremony. It is also a social and governmental union that can have nothing to do with religion.
Although I don't believe in alimony, I think child support is extremely important.
trollthis

Roanoke, VA

#10 Aug 26, 2012
smartybritches23 wrote:
He hasn't had his court date yet. He can't get out unless he bonds out. It has nothing to do with child support right now. He will get a sentence once his court date comes.
He actually did have one court date. The judge said "bond out." He has another day in court in September
help

Roanoke, VA

#11 Aug 26, 2012
Blank wrote:
<quoted text>No, what is really "dumb" is that you CHOSE a loser to marry and make a baby with, and then shack up with a boyfriend (no marriage?) and make another one.
Yea, see...this is the stupid crap I didn't want. You're rude, go to hell.
Clearly

Summerville, GA

#12 Aug 27, 2012
smartybritches23 wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree that what the first guy said was pretty ignorant but what ticks me off is when people troll for religious debates on here. And also, a marriage is not always a religious ceremony. It is also a social and governmental union that can have nothing to do with religion.
Although I don't believe in alimony, I think child support is extremely important.
It's true that marriage can be a "social and governmental union that can have nothing to do with religion." However, how often do you see someone judging a couple that isn't married because they don't file a joint tax return, etc.? Usually when someone tries to degrade someone for not being married..the motivation is a religious one. That's just reality. They think it's wrong that someone doesn't share the same moral values as they do. Why else would anyone have an issue with an unmarried couple living together, having kids, being homosexual, etc, etc...

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#13 Aug 28, 2012
Clearly wrote:
<quoted text>
It's true that marriage can be a "social and governmental union that can have nothing to do with religion." However, how often do you see someone judging a couple that isn't married because they don't file a joint tax return, etc.? Usually when someone tries to degrade someone for not being married..the motivation is a religious one. That's just reality. They think it's wrong that someone doesn't share the same moral values as they do. Why else would anyone have an issue with an unmarried couple living together, having kids, being homosexual, etc, etc...
Just because someone has morals, doesn't mean that itÂ’s their religious belief. I'm pretty sure there are lots of atheists that are married.
Clearly

Summerville, GA

#14 Aug 28, 2012
I'm sure there are plenty of atheists that are married, but that still didn't answer the question. How many atheists would condemn someone for not being married? How many 'christians' would? It's just reality.

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#15 Aug 28, 2012
Clearly wrote:
I'm sure there are plenty of atheists that are married, but that still didn't answer the question. How many atheists would condemn someone for not being married? How many 'christians' would? It's just reality.
There is no answer to your question, unless you plan on taking a poll. I would say most Christians would, I would say most Jews would, and most Muslims would......Because their regions have set morals they are expected to follow. But just because you have personal morals doesn't mean you have religion.
nope

Bristol, TN

#16 Sep 28, 2012
he isnt getting out because of the hold from the other 2 counties, child support has nothing to do with it if there is a hold from another county

“Unknown”

Since: Sep 12

Kingsport

#17 Sep 28, 2012
I would try to see what his holds are and what counties they are issued from, and then take up the matter from their reports.

You cannot be put on hold without a conviction of the area your in though, you would just be sent to the origin of the hold or warrant. So either your not getting the full story of why he is in jail at the moment or he has been convicted and cannot get out based upon that.

Basically if your waiting on your sentencing, YOU can post bail regardless, unless you failed probation or parole guidelines, or your "locked up" for another conviction, which are the only two options possible. Which leads up to, being impossible for being on hold, with other counties. You would be transferred immediately, to serve your time there and when sentencing arrives for the other county, then they would provide your transportation.

If he is truly innocent in these cases, that means no convictions and no warrants, and that he could post bail and wait for the following court appearances.

Only way bail cannot be set is for the different murder charges (unless involuntary). OR you pose a possible "flight risk".

Since: Mar 12

United States

#18 Oct 11, 2012
joke wrote:
The whole system is a joke and the best thing to do is stay out of it if at all possible!! I received child care assistance through the state while I went to college and worked so I had to agree to "cooperate with child support" in return. I didn't have a choice, but if I did then I would've picked option B!
I have two children - one with an ex and one with my current boyfriend of over 8 years. The ex owed thousands in child support and they never did anything to him. My current boyfriend and I had to go for the child we have together (even though we lived together and he paid for everything) and the judge threw him in jail because she said he had been served and hadn't shown up for court in the past. He didn't owe one single red cent in child support. The officer had taken the papers to his old address and left them with a relative which is what they considered served...
I'm not a lawyer or a judge...I only have a bachelors degree...so maybe that's why I think its stupid to let a deadbeat who owes thousands go free, but put a guy who doesn't owe a dime and has the family living with him in jail...
It took awhile, but I finally spoke to someone with some sense and got them to see how dumb it was that I was taking my own child support payments to the post office! He would literally give me the money and I would go get a money order and send it to nashville so they could process it and send it back as "child support." I also paid the 100 dollars to get him out of jail so I don't know how they thought that would benefit me or our child..
The lawyer who "represents" the custodial parents is hateful as all hell too. She gets onto the deadbeats which is good, but she's in no way nice to the mothers. I just thank god I don't have to deal with that mess anymore. It was something I had to do to get the help I needed to get through school, but they don't consider individual cases when applying the rules. I guess it would be hard to though since there are SO MANY deadbeat losers piled up on their desks.
Anyway, your friend might see people getting released because they get someone to make a large payment on what they owe. I know of a guy who got put in jail and they told him he could get out if he paid like 1500 dollars. Its amazing how many guys can't come up with the money to make a 300 dollar child support payment, but can come up with 2 grand overnight when they get put in jail!
AND THAT IS WHAT MY TOPIC WAS ABOUT SPIVEY..SHE IS THE CHILD SUPPORT ATTORNEY THAT TREATS EVERYONE EVEN HER OWN CLIENTS LIKE CRAP...GO READ HOW MY SIMPLE QUESTION GOT TURNED INTO A BUNCH OF BASHING OF MY MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE. PEOPLE CAN'T STAY ON TOPIC HERE.
DOUBT THAT

Abingdon, VA

#19 Oct 11, 2012
eyeswideshut1975 wrote:
<quoted text>
AND THAT IS WHAT MY TOPIC WAS ABOUT SPIVEY..SHE IS THE CHILD SUPPORT ATTORNEY THAT TREATS EVERYONE EVEN HER OWN CLIENTS LIKE CRAP...GO READ HOW MY SIMPLE QUESTION GOT TURNED INTO A BUNCH OF BASHING OF MY MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE. PEOPLE CAN'T STAY ON TOPIC HERE.
and yet again nag nag nag blah blh
Understanding

Johnson City, TN

#20 Oct 16, 2012
he needs to get an attorney and get all the mess cleaned up. Then get the attorney to somehow get it out of child support enforcement's hands. That would require the mother to not ask for anymore government assistance first, then agree to a good plan for visitation and child support. As long as the gets government assistance, he will always have to deal with child support enforcement.

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