How to cope with boyfriends kids

How to cope with boyfriends kids

Posted in the Kingsport Forum

Citizen soldier

York, SC

#1 Dec 17, 2012
I started dating a guy and yes I knew he had 3 kids. But I never met them for a few months. Now that I have and he's i developed feelings for the bf but OMG those kids Are wild. My children are older and his are young way young elementary young. I can't take it what can I do? Please someone help me with some good advise. I don't want to hurt no one :(
AvgJo

Lenoir City, TN

#2 Dec 18, 2012
talk to bf not ask a hostile "community"

“The blessings of liberty”

Since: Oct 09

Location hidden

#3 Dec 18, 2012
Citizen soldier wrote:
I started dating a guy and yes I knew he had 3 kids. But I never met them for a few months. Now that I have and he's i developed feelings for the bf but OMG those kids Are wild. My children are older and his are young way young elementary young. I can't take it what can I do? Please someone help me with some good advise. I don't want to hurt no one :(
Move on. He's not going to let you straighten them out, or even if he let's you try there will be trouble and you will come out the loser. My advice is to simply tell him the truth. Just say, "you can't handle his kids. No hard feelings but I know they need you, and I don't want to come between you and them" And then move on. Do delay or be wishy washy. Make a clean break.

For what it's worth.
Been There

Concord, NC

#4 Dec 18, 2012
So true, You Will always be the outsider, When they get older they Will disrespect you and when you say something YOU Will be the bad guy, coming from someone who has dealt with it for the last several years. Any baby momma drama? Run like Hell. Also your wants and needs Will be 4 th on the list of important things.
Citizen soldier

Sharon, SC

#5 Dec 18, 2012
Thanks to all for the information. I found it helpful.
Parent of the year

Gate City, VA

#6 Dec 18, 2012
You can do what the other guys say or you can get you a leather belt and whoop some azz, you and the dad both. Sometimes the children just become azzholes about these things because they CAN. In my day a child was just that, a child. And the adults ran the show while the children STFU.
Been There

Asheboro, NC

#7 Dec 19, 2012
She could whoop some azz but I tried that and all I heard was there just kids, they want to know why YOU act like YOU do, there going through a hard time...blah blah blah.well I didn't do it too them bit still get the blame and all the disrespect, Like I said before for your sake and sanity RUN LIKE HELL. Or you Will be #4 ALWAYS. You Will be good enough to put a roof over there heads, pick them up, take places, feed them, buy them clothes, presents and all that and when you add your two cents you' ll be told it doesn't matter because YOUR not there parent.

“The blessings of liberty”

Since: Oct 09

Location hidden

#8 Dec 19, 2012
Parent of the year wrote:
You can do what the other guys say or you can get you a leather belt and whoop some azz, you and the dad both. Sometimes the children just become azzholes about these things because they CAN. In my day a child was just that, a child. And the adults ran the show while the children STFU.
I sure this was overstated a little for effect... But still I think you miss the point. From what we can gather from the original post you are correct these kids need a firm hand, however, it is a lose lose situation for a girlfriend or boyfriend to attempt the straighten out these kids. Even if she makes the mistake of marrying this guy she will still be the outsider when it comes to these kids. The question isn't, "do these kids need disipline?" That goes without saying. The question is, "should she put up with their bad behavior?" And, "should she stay and try to help?" And the answer, sad to say, is "NO."
oh by the way

Charleston, TN

#9 Dec 19, 2012
Run as fast as you can step kids are the devils spawn.
Citizen soldier

United States

#10 Dec 19, 2012
Lol I am beginning to believe that I should run. I just hate so bad that we as a couple are good but is as a whole is bad. He has done pointed out some faults on my child mainly because he is shy. He is a teenager and yes he is shy but he doesn't go around tearing up people's furniture and jumping on couches the first time they ever been there like his did. None of his kids are teenagers so I don't expect them to sit still but a little respect for my home would be nice. I just don't know how to tell him because he is a nice guy but Just because their mother don't want them it's like he is pushing me into her place and I just don't want to go there. I hate to hurt anyone and thanks for all the advice
Painted and PROUD

United States

#11 Dec 19, 2012
Yes honey Run. He is probably looking to find someone who will raise his kids so he won't have them all the time if their mother don't want them. Don't let him you use you life is to short.
Parent of the year

Gate City, VA

#12 Dec 19, 2012
What is wrong with kids these days anyhow? With all this hyper-crap dissorders for an excuse they can just wreak havoc on a parent ,step parent or humanity in general, seems most have it these days. As I said in my day when I became hyper, it wasnt anything that a willow switch diddnt fix. It calmed me down right quick. But now a days if a child tells someone at school they got a spanking, you might be jailed or even lose your kids thanks to DSS and the school. Now im not talking about beating or trashing a child, but a good spanking every now or then teaches a child whos boss. With parents being unable to spank our kids these days, is it any wonder that some go nuts like the one in conn did? Im not implying this is your case cause I dont know you, just explains my first post a little better.
Been there

Nebo, NC

#13 Dec 22, 2012
Kids are more wild these days. I'm a single mother and its hard to cope with just my son and making it on our own much less try and take on someone else's Children. You will most of the time anyway have any sort of respect from them. Well that's just my opinion anyway. A good switch never killed anyone it didn't me nor did it my parents and yes they were good parents thy just kept the house in order.
No Name

Kingsport, TN

#14 May 12, 2013
Leave skid marks!! Get the HELL out!!
otis boogertoe

Taylor, MI

#15 May 13, 2013
leave him im like milk ill do your body good ;)
Been there

Kingsport, TN

#16 May 18, 2013
oh by the way wrote:
Run as fast as you can step kids are the devils spawn.
Actually, I loved my step-mother with all my heart. She was the evil one. 20 years later, she conveniently doesn't remember any of it.

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