I'm afraid of my bf
In trouble

United States

#1 Apr 27, 2013
He is so abusive and I have a small child and am dependent on him so I feel like I have no way out. I have no real family to turn to help me. He says he loves us but he never shows any affection or any signs that he really love me. In fact just the opposite. He is very cruel to me and blames me for things that atr his fault. I try to be nice to him but he's be unfaithful with my friends & women i thought i could trust and now having sex just make me want to cry and i have no desire to have sex. All i can think about is the other women he's betrayed me with and all the horrible things he's said about me to his friends & ho's. he doesnt respect me or care how i feel. He wont hear about anything i have to talk about. He makes look stupid and inadequate no matter what i try to do. He's uncaring and never offers any gifts or romanic gestures and its been several years now. I've given cards, bday parties and tried to involve him in my life but he has no interest in it. I use to love him but and thought he would change for me & the baby but he get worse. I know he would hurt me without even thinking if i said anything to provoke him so i say nothing. I'm so afraid of him hurting me or saying or doing something that would cause my baby scare or scare it more i just let the lies, the insults, the verbal abuse & unkindness go without defending myself 99% of the time. I cant win a argument anyways or make him sorry. He's not going to give a chance or show any compassion towards us. Its about him, his needs and we should expect nothing from him that requires him to put any of himself into or time into or honesty and effort to make things right. I dont feel the same now, he's destroyed my love, trust ' joy of being with him. Any advice? And pls no hurtful, smart remarks. I dont want to hurt him just get away from from his coldness & neglect and abuse.
noso

North Vernon, IN

#2 Apr 27, 2013
You need a lawyer ask them for help put the money part on him all guys are not that way get out of it while you can
Wondering

Murray, KY

#3 Apr 27, 2013
How old are you?
Foolish Love

Dyer, TN

#4 Apr 27, 2013
In trouble wrote:
He is so abusive...... I dont want to hurt him just get away from from his coldness & neglect and abuse.
You just answered your own question.
Lock

London, KY

#5 Apr 27, 2013
In trouble wrote:
He is so abusive and I have a small child and am dependent on him so I feel like I have no way out. I have no real family to turn to help me. He says he loves us but he never shows any affection or any signs that he really love me. In fact just the opposite. He is very cruel to me and blames me for things that atr his fault. I try to be nice to him but he's be unfaithful with my friends & women i thought i could trust and now having sex just make me want to cry and i have no desire to have sex. All i can think about is the other women he's betrayed me with and all the horrible things he's said about me to his friends & ho's. he doesnt respect me or care how i feel. He wont hear about anything i have to talk about. He makes look stupid and inadequate no matter what i try to do. He's uncaring and never offers any gifts or romanic gestures and its been several years now. I've given cards, bday parties and tried to involve him in my life but he has no interest in it. I use to love him but and thought he would change for me & the baby but he get worse. I know he would hurt me without even thinking if i said anything to provoke him so i say nothing. I'm so afraid of him hurting me or saying or doing something that would cause my baby scare or scare it more i just let the lies, the insults, the verbal abuse & unkindness go without defending myself 99% of the time. I cant win a argument anyways or make him sorry. He's not going to give a chance or show any compassion towards us. Its about him, his needs and we should expect nothing from him that requires him to put any of himself into or time into or honesty and effort to make things right. I dont feel the same now, he's destroyed my love, trust ' joy of being with him. Any advice? And pls no hurtful, smart remarks. I dont want to hurt him just get away from from his coldness & neglect and abuse.
I believe there is a womans shelter in london.Call social service and tell them you need help.They will find you a place to live and help you get training to get on your feet.He will have to pay child support,but you can't live off of the tiny amount you will probably getDon't hang around til you get more kids,that will only give you more excuses to not do what you know you have to do.
Escape

Somerset, KY

#6 Apr 28, 2013
There are shelters in London, Barbourville, Williamsburg, and Mt Vernon that will help you. There is no excuse to stay with a man that abuses you. NONE. There are too many programs to help these days that were not available years ago and now the police WILL get involved in domestic matters. If you are staying, it's because you feel you deserve it due to low self esteem. I know, I was there for years but I made my way out and I'm free and happy now. Get out NOW while you can, before he hurts or kills you or hurts your child, and you know it's coming, they always escalate the abuse. Do this for your child if not for yourself.
could happen

Dexter, MO

#7 Apr 28, 2013
dont know your situation but I finally told my dad and he beat the hell out of him and now he never looks my way,also hes like a scared little kitten,he was just not a man,really bad to kids and women,I always heard this about women beaters but a 60 year old man beat him at his own game,thanks dad
nope

United States

#8 Apr 28, 2013
If you stay, it is no longer his fault. From t
his point on, every mean thing he does, every awful thing your baby goes through, every other woman he Sleeps with....... It is all your fault, and you are simply living the life you have chosen.
Lock

London, KY

#9 Apr 28, 2013
could happen wrote:
dont know your situation but I finally told my dad and he beat the hell out of him and now he never looks my way,also hes like a scared little kitten,he was just not a man,really bad to kids and women,I always heard this about women beaters but a 60 year old man beat him at his own game,thanks dad
And this tickles the chit out of you?You are the baby who had to have her daddy to get her out [but you'll go back] they always do.til one of them are killed.Yes wife and girlfriend beaters usually have had the crap beaten out of them ,so they are still scared so they do to others what was done to them,that's why the 1 st. time will be the last time,if the woman isn't a baby who wants to be taken care of herself,and lets him beat her in exchange for security [money]
Lock

London, KY

#10 Apr 28, 2013
Foolish Love wrote:
<quoted text> You just answered your own question.
You'd be right,except for,she wants his actions and reactions stopped.I'm afraid she is wanting help on how to change him;Ain't gonna happen.
could happen

Dexter, MO

#11 Apr 28, 2013
sorry to disappoint you but I have remarried to a great man,sounds like you may be a beater and deserve the same,have a good day
Lock

London, KY

#12 Apr 28, 2013
could happen wrote:
sorry to disappoint you but I have remarried to a great man,sounds like you may be a beater and deserve the same,have a good day
I am not disapointed .I wish you well.fact is i am a woman who has just seen it happen one time too many.We once helped a relative out of a abusive relationship,by packing her apt.up for her and moving her out ,that same day by midnight,she was back with him.
Email of person to help u

Williamsburg, KY

#13 Apr 28, 2013
I copied this from another post on here about abuse... Please contact this person and know there is help out there to break free of your circumstances. "I can relate to what you are going through. If you or anyone else dealing with past/present abuse, it is safe to email me:-)
[email protected] Sometimes it helps just to talk and have support" Good luck and God Bless.
could happen

Dexter, MO

#14 Apr 28, 2013
I am sorry,I just got mad with your post ,please accept ,I shouldnt of replied.
Lock

London, KY

#15 Apr 28, 2013
could happen wrote:
I am sorry,I just got mad with your post ,please accept ,I shouldnt of replied.
You are fine,it's ok.I really am happy you got out and stayed out.

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