Woman won't take paternity test

Woman won't take paternity test

Posted in the Jonesborough Forum

Sam

Kingsport, TN

#1 Dec 31, 2011
Says boy is mine, he don't look like me or my other sons. I offered to pay for it but no she just expects me to believe her. Even the young man don't know. It sad for me and him.
A mom

United States

#2 Jan 2, 2012
Why does she need to take a paternity test? Wouldn't you & the kid take it? You can go to juv court & ask for one to be ordered I think. Or just call child support enforcement; they establish paternity all the time, they can refer you to what steps you need to take first.
Also, genetics is way too complicated to be judged by eye site. None of my kids really look like each other, or like their dad, but one of them is the spitting image of a great uncle of mine--there are too many factors that go into our appearance to judge paternity conclusively by eye site.
I would not be giving any support without my rights established if it was me, but I would also be proactive about finding out if this child was my responsibility or not, & in the meantime maybe make support payments to a savings account so you can build up some funds. I wouldn't give her any money ( I mean, other than if human decency dictated it- like it shouldn't matter if it's your kid or not if it's an emergency) without it being tracked by a court.
Highlights

Morristown, TN

#3 Jan 2, 2012
Hhmmm... I'm sorry to hear there are other people out there who are bein' told of a baby / child they have by someone they aren't with. My boyfriend's x w**e claims her kid's his. She WON'T leave us alone. She has another kid by another guy who's almost eleven and she doesn't bother her other daughter's dad. Doesn't harass or terrorize him. I've brought up paternity testing to my boyfriend and HE refuses.... whatever ... As far as I know he's seen this baby TWICE, MAYBE THREE TIMES since it was born last year. She wants my boyfriend anyWAY she can get him and anyWHERE. This has strained J's and my relationship since February. He can't / doesn't see this baby because the mom's dad hates him and she lives with 'er dad. And J's family supposedly hates the skank. He has four other daughters by two ex wives whom I've met and LOVE. She and her dad live in Fall Branch and J and his parents live in Gray. He can have this chick anytime he wants. He just has to go to the Fort Henry Walmart in Kingsport at eight. Then, she'd (or WILL) blow him in his mom's Suzuki in the parkin' lot on 'er lunch break. BUT HE HASN'T SEEN this BABY... He's told me he hates the thing, but he's never told the THING. And, he's told ME HE HATES ME. He claims he'll never be in a relationship with 'er again and supposedly told the thing. But if and when he's single, he'll go see this thing for h**d.

And, I'd like to find out personally about paternity testing. How much and what it includes. If the baby needs to be present also, not sure if it'd be done. But, I'd like to find out.
FriendofDog

United States

#4 Jan 2, 2012
If you want a paternity test to hold up in Court, it costs around $300.00.(to get the paperwork needed to file it in court) If you just want to know "to know" you can get it done for about half of that.
A mom

United States

#5 Jan 2, 2012
Like friend of dog says, you do have to pay more for one that the courts will honor, but you can get the kits off the Internet cheaply. Usually you swab the parent's mouth & the child's, & send the swabs in for testing. The kid doesn't have to know what it is for.

Highlights-- Girl, it sounds like you could find a better boyfriend! Anyone whose gonna let something little like people not liking him from seeing his kid, is not a healthy person capable of an adult relationship. My ex hated me, his fam hated me, I hated him & them, lol, but that didn't stop him from going to court & getting visitation established. We did it with no direct contact, my sis would do the drop off for me & we communicated by notebook. Sorry, but an ex being a whore is no excuse to be a deadbeat.
I've read other posts by you about him, & they make me sad bc they are so familiar. No one is going to give you the love you need unless you give it to yourself first, & unless you hang out with people who are capable of loving. I think you know that someone with as many exes and kids and drama as the man you are fighting over has not acquired the skills he needs to be a partner. I am someone who believes anyone can change, but also, you need a reason to change. Doesn't sound like he has his reason yet. I'm not going to tell a complete stranger to dump her boyfriend over the Internet or anything, but I do want you to know that things get better, there are plenty of people out there who will love you if you make the choices to be around the right people & to spend your energy growing as a person instead of trying to find your worth in a guy that repeatedly jerks you around & treats you like absolute shit, from what you say.

Since: Aug 08

Kingsport, TN

#6 Jan 2, 2012
Guess you didn't go around making fun of her and telling everybody how you are going to make her take a blood test like my son's sperm donor type person did, that sure got him a paternity test and the child support that went with it. If you have asked her nicely and now they have home test were you guys might be able to do it without the kid knowing, and she still won't take it, it sounds to me like she has doubts.

“You can't fix stupid”

Since: Sep 11

Neither here nor there

#7 Jan 26, 2012
Why would a woman need to take a paternity test? You'd think she'd remember a little thing that drags on for 9 months like giving birth to a child or not.

Since: Aug 08

United States

#8 Jan 26, 2012
RU Nuckin Futz wrote:
Why would a woman need to take a paternity test? You'd think she'd remember a little thing that drags on for 9 months like giving birth to a child or not.
HA HA paternity determines fatherhood , maternity determines motherhood. Used to be the mom,child and alleged father had to all be present and give samples
Maury

United States

#9 Jan 27, 2012
You are not the daddy!
Grim Reaper

Richmond, VA

#10 Jan 29, 2012
You need to get the court to force her to take it. They will screw you over with back child support if you don't. You will already be hit with back to the day of the birth but the longer you go the high that builds. Sounds to me she is just running up the tab and waiting to cash in. That is what happen to me. And just to let you know they charge 12% interest about 1% monthly on the total of back support you get hit with. So waiting can be very profitable for her. Do you know of any other invest that has such a good return? Plus they will take your tax refund until it paid off as well. You are better off getting it done early. I was told that baby was not mine and 6 years later she showed up saying now she did not know I still had to have 2 judges and and 3 lawyers make her do it and one of the lawyers was hers. But it did not matter that she told me the baby was not mine they hit me with it anyways. The system stacked against fathers so just keep that in mind. The longer you wait the worse it will be for you.

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