Why do men in relationships look at p...

Why do men in relationships look at porn?

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Curious

Little Rock, AR

#1 Sep 11, 2009
Why is it that a man in a relationship would want to look at porn on the internet? Especially if he can have sex with his girlfriend/wife whenever he wants? I would understand if a man was refused sex often, or if he was single, but it doesn't make sense to me under any other circumstance. Any thoughts?
Julie

Little Rock, AR

#2 Sep 11, 2009
um, because men are mindless pigs?

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“I'm mean because you're dumb.”

Since: Mar 09

Jonesboro, AR

#4 Sep 12, 2009
Curious wrote:
Why is it that a man in a relationship would want to look at porn on the internet? Especially if he can have sex with his girlfriend/wife whenever he wants? I would understand if a man was refused sex often, or if he was single, but it doesn't make sense to me under any other circumstance. Any thoughts?
Maybe, just maybe, they want a bit of fantasy. I mean, really, how many celebs do you fantasize about as a woman? How many times have you pleasured yourself while thinking of another? Looking at the porn is a self-gratification issue, much like eating a piece of cake or drinking a glass of wine.. just a little messier and not overly enjoyable for other people to watch.

“I'm mean because you're dumb.”

Since: Mar 09

Jonesboro, AR

#5 Sep 12, 2009
Oh, also, if you were looking for advice on how to stop it, (after all, I'm assuming you're female and females are obnoxiously good at that whole nagging thing) I would advise not to worry about it. Don't ask him about it, don't think about it, don't be alarmed. However, he would likely be pleased if you watched it with him.
guest

Leesville, LA

#6 Sep 12, 2009
I love my boyfriend to watch porn while i go down on him, he doesn't last but about 30 seconds! lol Then we get to watch whatever i want to!
Brand X

Olive Branch, MS

#7 Sep 12, 2009
Men are visually oriented and heterosexual men are aroused by the sight of any attractive naked female.
Greeting

United States

#8 Sep 12, 2009
WE AS MEn love Sex and trying to get our women preg.its what we do and who we are even though we may say we dont but trust me we do want sex and lots and lots of babies! This is mens dark secret that we dont tell yall ladies.
inside out

United States

#9 Sep 12, 2009
for some guys it is a sickness..guys use all kinds of excuses as to why they look at it and alot of them hides the fact they look at it.........any which way to me its a turn off and put down for a woman or at least most of us
Larry Fleeynt

Deridder, LA

#10 Sep 12, 2009
Porn is MORALLY WRONG!
People should actually do what they're doing in the flicks instead of just safely watching ;)
Curious

Little Rock, AR

#11 Sep 12, 2009
Well thank you for the feedback. I wish there was a way to make him stop, and no I do not nag him about it. It does severely hurt our relationship though, and it makes me very unhappy. If I did something that was disgusting to him, that repulsed him, don't you think he would want me to stop doing it? And I would. I just wonder if all guys do it, or if there are men out there who would be satisfied with looking at his own naked lady..... I am not aroused by other people, even celebrities, so I guess I cannot relate. I only want my man, so it doesn't make sense to me.

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guest

Bossier City, LA

#12 Sep 12, 2009
If you are in a relationship and your man watches porn..then they have a serious problem. Not only is it disrespectful towards you, but he obviously isn't satisfied with you! If he has to watch porn to get off or be excited, then there is no reason for you to be with him. It will always be that way and you will never be able to please him the way he wants. some guys are just that way!

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Curious

Little Rock, AR

#13 Sep 12, 2009
Thank you guest. I am leaning towards the same way of thinking that you have. He must not be sexually satisfied by me. I am in my early twenties, and (not trying to be conceited at all) I am not an unattractive person. He used to be attracted to me, but I think it has changed. My fear is that this will lead to more serious offenses (such as online chatting or physical cheating). If you were me, would you end the relationship? It is good in all other aspects, I just cannot get past this one.
guest

Jacksonville, AR

#14 Sep 12, 2009
It is inappropriate, and it is an addiction. It should be treated as such.

If he was a drunk (or junkie, or compulsive gambler), but everything else about him is great, what would you do?

It's not a small problem, and is as serious as those other issues mentioned. Seek out a local support group for serious advice.
Curious

United States

#15 Sep 12, 2009
I can't say for sure if you should end your relationship. I will however tell you what happened with my exhusband. He began watching porn on tv, then bought DVDs, it progressed to looking at porn on his phone. Eventually he started texting "sexting" and IMing other females. I found out and we tried to make it work. Although he says he never physically touched any of them our marriage was never the same. We eventually divorced and honestly I miss his friendship but I'm happier than I ever was with him.
guest

AOL

#16 Sep 12, 2009
After perusing "mature" women sites, my husband had affair with much older (8 yrs) woman. After that his attitude changed and he refused to work on marriage and ignores family. He would not stop his involvement. Now I have to file for divorce due to his attitude and emotional abuse.

“I'm mean because you're dumb.”

Since: Mar 09

Jonesboro, AR

#17 Sep 12, 2009
Did you women ever sit down and have a rational discussion with him WITHOUT nagging or placing blame before the relationship problems?
Curious

Little Rock, AR

#18 Sep 12, 2009
Yes I have sat down and had discussions with him about the problem. I have done so in a non-threatening way, and tried to make him understand why it bothered me. I have tried every approach known to man and no matter what I do, he still does it. He promises me he won't look at that stuff anymore, and I inevitably find it. He looks at it online, on his phone, etc. I have tried every approach I can think of. I have even written him letters. I would hate to end this relationship, but if he won't stop I don't think I have any other choice. Maladi, I am assuming you are a male. So why don't you give "us women" some serious insight. What gets through to a guy?
Allen

Alexander, AR

#19 Sep 12, 2009
guest says "If you are in a relationship and your man watches porn..then they have a serious problem. Not only is it disrespectful towards you, but he obviously isn't satisfied with you!"

This is way off. The two things have almost nothing in common. A man can be completely committed to his wife and still like a little fantasy life too. Just because you view some porn doesn't mean that you really want to have sex with those women. It is just a harmless fantasy that women should not be threatened by. And, by the way, EVERY man that knows about the internet looks at naked women on the internet at least occasionally. Yes, your man too.
Curious

Little Rock, AR

#20 Sep 12, 2009
Allen, I appreciate your input. I would really like to believe that he is committed/satisfied with me. I just wish that men could act out their fantasy lives with the person they are with, instead of looking elsewhere. And when it comes to the point that it is really bothering me, I don't understand why he wouldn't stop. I have heard before that most men do this, and I get that men are visual creatures. I have also heard that it has something to do with age (we are in our early twenties) and that he would grow out of it. I just know that this leads to other things... Maybe I just cannot get past it and need to be single for the rest of my life!
BSMF

Montgomery, TX

#21 Sep 12, 2009
My wife likes to watch porn WITH me, and occasionally make our own. So, there is not a problem there with us. WE are just sexually adventureous.

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