Cruising in the city park

Cruising in the city park

There are 58 comments on the Jacksonville Daily News story from Jul 10, 2006, titled Cruising in the city park. In it, Jacksonville Daily News reports that:

A Web site that provides more than 15,000 locations where gay and bisexual men meet for sex lists several locations in Jacksonville, including Northeast Creek Park.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Jacksonville Daily News.

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god

London, UK

#1 Jul 11, 2006
why d' you think i gave men dicks n stuff ?!:-)
Dave Seattle Wa

Seattle, WA

#2 Jul 11, 2006
god wrote:
why d' you think i gave men dicks n stuff ?!:-)
Man, I love your sense of humor. I fondly remember my crusin' days in the parks. What a hoot!!!!!
god

London, UK

#3 Jul 11, 2006
Gr8 ! Hope ur still gettin plenty ... one way and another.
If not have a word with Me tonight :-)
Dave Seattle Wa

Seattle, WA

#4 Jul 16, 2006
god wrote:
Gr8 ! Hope ur still gettin plenty ... one way and another.
If not have a word with Me tonight :-)
I'll look forward to that. My first Job with God. You must be an expert by now. LOL
Rob in NY

Shoreham, NY

#5 Jul 16, 2006
Hey wait a minute! I want in on this...
god

Stowmarket, UK

#6 Jul 16, 2006
Dave Seattle WA --hope going well for you....wink !:-)
Rob in you too !:-)

ENJOY Boi !
jason

Morehead City, NC

#8 Aug 12, 2006
Dave Seattle Wa wrote:
<quoted text>
Man, I love your sense of humor. I fondly remember my crusin' days in the parks. What a hoot!!!!!
whats the website????
Inquisitarian

Philadelphia, PA

#9 Aug 12, 2006
Small wonder we have the reputation we do.

I've never gone cruising for sex anywhere - I just don't see the attraction.

:sigh: To each their own I guess, but I don't want to hear any of you whining the next time someone accuses our community of being promiscuous and hedonistic.
Dave Seattle Wa

Seattle, WA

#10 Aug 13, 2006
There's nothing wrong with cruising. And with due consideration for STD's, there is nothing wrong with being promiscuous and hedonistic. After all not all Americans want to live by puritanical standards, and that includes hetrosexuals as well.
Also, not everyone wants/or is suitable for marriage, witness the large # of divorces in this country, the spousal/child abuse within marriages, let alnoe additional problems because of drug/alcohol abuse. yes, I think polyamorous relationships are sometimes the best; or at least open relationships.
Dave Seattle Wa

Seattle, WA

#11 Aug 13, 2006
god wrote:
Dave Seattle WA --hope going well for you....wink !:-)
Rob in you too !:-)
ENJOY Boi !
You, also, God. And 'Human Bless'!!!
Dave Seattle Wa

Seattle, WA

#12 Aug 13, 2006
Rob in NY wrote:
Hey wait a minute! I want in on this...
The definition of "ascension" gonna have to change after this one!!!!!! lol
Rob in NY

Shoreham, NY

#13 Aug 13, 2006
Dave Seattle Wa wrote:
<quoted text>
The definition of "ascension" gonna have to change after this one!!!!!! lol
LOL... you got that one right, Dave..
Dave Seattle Wa

Seattle, WA

#14 Aug 14, 2006
Well, Rob another thing in common we appreciate the same type of humor: wry, satirical, and ironic, correct?
Yobyag

Bryn Mawr, PA

#15 Aug 15, 2006
Inquisitarian wrote:
Small wonder we have the reputation we do.
I've never gone cruising for sex anywhere - I just don't see the attraction.
:sigh: To each their own I guess, but I don't want to hear any of you whining the next time someone accuses our community of being promiscuous and hedonistic.
Cruising is not limited to Gays. Heteros just have more bars and clubs available to do their cruising.

When I was in college, all any of the guys AND girls ever talked about on Friday night is how much they wanted to go find some anonymous sex.

just Google for "find sex tonight" and you'll get thousands of results mostly geared towards heteros. Let's not pretend Gays are the only ones who do it.
Inquisitarian

Ann Arbor, MI

#16 Aug 15, 2006
Yobyag wrote:
<quoted text>
Cruising is not limited to Gays. Heteros just have more bars and clubs available to do their cruising.
When I was in college, all any of the guys AND girls ever talked about on Friday night is how much they wanted to go find some anonymous sex.
just Google for "find sex tonight" and you'll get thousands of results mostly geared towards heteros. Let's not pretend Gays are the only ones who do it.
What's more important - temporary pleasures, or our basic civil rights?

I'm not denying that heterosexuals are also cruising for anonymous sex. But are they cruising AND acting on those encounters in public parks and rest areas?'Cuz I don't here about such places being shut down because of heterosexual activity, whereas I have seen it happen to curb homosexual activity.

Are we that incapable of acting with a sense of responsibility and in that much of a hurry that we can't at least take it somewhere private? I see a big difference between simple displays of public affection versus sexual romps in public places.

Is that really the kind of world you want - one where anything goes, anytime, anywhere?

If so, then maybe we deserve the reputation we have. I'm not fighting for anyone to have a right to engage in sexual activity in public. That subset of the community will have to form their own lobby, as far as I'm concerned.
Rob in AZ

Santa Clara, CA

#17 Aug 15, 2006
Well - having sex in public places is simply extremely inconsiderate. If you want to go at it you should either go to a private club or have fun in your own home or a hotel or whatever.

Although I consider it as extremely bad taste and these cruising parks should be suppressed if they are anything more then meeting places ......... as long as nobody is harmed I would consider it a misdemeanor punishable with a fine like a parking ticket.... certainly not a felony like in some states.
Inquisitarian

Philadelphia, PA

#18 Aug 15, 2006
Their definitely being used as more than meeting places.

I recognize that monogamy isn't for everyone, but I also don't have a lot of respect for the 'if it feels good, do it' crowd. It's not that I begrudge anyone having fun. It's that I feel there's a lot more of life via interpersonal relationships to be experienced - good and bad - than just the endless pursuit of one's next orgasm.

Long term commitment - monogamous or not - takes a lot of work and a certain amount of maturity. I just don't see anything mature, or any potential for growth as a person being linked to anonymous sex.

Having lived with a confessed sex addict, I can tell you there's more to that behavior than just having fun. Part of it's the thrill of danger - the adrenaline rush that comes from hooking up with a total stranger, often in circumstances that could lead to one's arrest if caught. It's the thrill of the unknown - not being sure what the other person will do next. It can become a psychological and unhealthy addiction for some people.
Yobyag

Bryn Mawr, PA

#19 Aug 15, 2006
It was not my intention to defend the behavior, in fact I find it to be juvenile, rude, and dangerous. My main point was that it is not exclusively a gay thing, it's a human thing.

To expect the Gay community to magically put themselves above normal, yet flawed, human behavior to remove a stereotype is like telling Southerners to lose their accents so they don't "Sound like a redneck" or telling blacks to stop using slang and "speak proper english".

Casual sex will never go away. Only how we look for it.

And please don't get on my case about the black and southerner things. I was using extreme examples to make a point. I don't actually feel that way.
Inquisitarian

Ann Arbor, MI

#20 Aug 16, 2006
Yobyag wrote:
It was not my intention to defend the behavior, in fact I find it to be juvenile, rude, and dangerous. My main point was that it is not exclusively a gay thing, it's a human thing.
To expect the Gay community to magically put themselves above normal, yet flawed, human behavior to remove a stereotype is like telling Southerners to lose their accents so they don't "Sound like a redneck" or telling blacks to stop using slang and "speak proper english".
I'm not asking anything of the kind. There are always going to be people who act irresponsibly. My criticism was aimed at the apparent support for it that started off this thread.

The root problem as I see it IS an attitude prevalent among a not so insignificant portion of our community that none of society's rules apply to them, since they're gay; that there should be no standards, no restrictions and no criticism of irresponsible behavior no matter the effect on society. It's not hard to see how they arrive at that attitude, either - since some of society's norms aren't terribly rational and do merit challenging.

This is part of what creeps out a lot of heterosexuals who might otherwise be more inclined to listen to arguments aimed at eliminating the double standards and establishing fair play for gay people - the attitude held by the more radical segments of our community that they're somehow exempt and that the collective values of our society are something to crap on.

What some would term progress (free love, no strings attached, no commitment or fidelity, etc.) are viewed by most of society as a regression to barbarity, making us no better than animals. I prefer a middle ground - one that allows people a reasonable amount of freedom to choose their lifestyle (and when I say lifestyle, I don't mean the idiotic idea that people choose their orientation, but rather the real meaning of lifestyle), but doesn't just give them a free pass to do anything and everything they want without any consideration for how it affects the rest of society or shields them from any criticism.

In short, while I value liberty, I'm no anarchist.
DC Gay

Arlington, VA

#21 Aug 16, 2006
Inquisitarian wrote:
<quoted text>
What's more important - temporary pleasures, or our basic civil rights?
I'm not denying that heterosexuals are also cruising for anonymous sex. But are they cruising AND acting on those encounters in public parks and rest areas?'Cuz I don't here about such places being shut down because of heterosexual activity, whereas I have seen it happen to curb homosexual activity.
Are we that incapable of acting with a sense of responsibility and in that much of a hurry that we can't at least take it somewhere private? I see a big difference between simple displays of public affection versus sexual romps in public places.
Is that really the kind of world you want - one where anything goes, anytime, anywhere?
If so, then maybe we deserve the reputation we have. I'm not fighting for anyone to have a right to engage in sexual activity in public. That subset of the community will have to form their own lobby, as far as I'm concerned.
Remember Lover's Lane?

American culture is full of locations and instances when/where public sex is condoned, and sometimes encouraged, for heterosexuals (define proper behavior at a bachelor's party). To point at news coverage and arrest statistics for gay men engaged in public sex, to characterize its prevalence is a poor way to go about it.

Likewise, heteros aren't out there arguing for public acceptance of their exhibitionism because our culture already condones and masks the promiscuous nature of that activity. the beach scene in From Here to Eternity would be a felony offence if acted out by two men.

I am in no way advocating a deviation from sexual norms for gay people. My comment is only that the "norm" gets redefined structurally when applied to gay men and women. Activity that is allowed for heteros is marginalized and pathologized in gay men.

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