is there life after divorce, when doe...

is there life after divorce, when does the hurt go away?

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LIFE AFTER DIVORCE

Williston, SC

#1 Sep 15, 2008
I would like to know this and when does the hurt go away if you still are in love with the other person?
People say

Williston, SC

#2 Sep 15, 2008
that getting a divorce is worse than your husband/wife dying. I don't understand that, but again you would have to see you ex with others and that would hurt real bad if you still cared. And if your spouse passed away then you know where they would be. (I'm not trying to be mean whatsoever) That's just what some say.
Been there done that

Neenah, WI

#3 Sep 15, 2008
The hurt stays in your heart a long time if you still love the otheer person, but it does get easier as time goes on. Then someday you will find that You didn't love this person as much as you thought you did when another love comes into your life. I had this to happen to me, I so dearly love my second husband with all my heart and soul, he is my life now and I hardly ever think back to my exhusband of whom I thought I was truly in love with. Yes it hurt when I lost my first husband in a divorce, but to think of the pain I would have if I should lose my husband now would break my heart and shatter my life and I don't even wont to think of the pian, my life would be over. I will soon be married 25 winderful years and nothing or no one could ever take my husbands place or tear us apart. Thats what you call True Love.
So if you are hurting from a divorce, hang in there, you will find your true love and be happy once again. Don't cry over the past to long, life is short at times and no one knows when it will end, so cry now but tomorrow look for a brighter day. Good luck.
Amanda

Lewisport, KY

#4 Sep 15, 2008
I went through a divorce, but I knew well before we made the decision to divorce, sp it really didn't take me long to get over it. It sounds like you were realy in love with this person, and all I can tell you is to keep your head up and realize that life goes on. I wish you the best of luck in getting you life back on track.

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
Thanks

Williston, SC

#5 Sep 16, 2008
Been there done that wrote:
The hurt stays in your heart a long time if you still love the otheer person, but it does get easier as time goes on. Then someday you will find that You didn't love this person as much as you thought you did when another love comes into your life. I had this to happen to me, I so dearly love my second husband with all my heart and soul, he is my life now and I hardly ever think back to my exhusband of whom I thought I was truly in love with. Yes it hurt when I lost my first husband in a divorce, but to think of the pain I would have if I should lose my husband now would break my heart and shatter my life and I don't even wont to think of the pian, my life would be over. I will soon be married 25 winderful years and nothing or no one could ever take my husbands place or tear us apart. Thats what you call True Love.
So if you are hurting from a divorce, hang in there, you will find your true love and be happy once again. Don't cry over the past to long, life is short at times and no one knows when it will end, so cry now but tomorrow look for a brighter day. Good luck.
You must can read minds. But thank you maybe there is hope afterall. I sure hope so. It's just been a short time and I hurt so bad. I can't seem to get past it. But maybe I will end up like you and find my true mate. I sure hope so. I don't know how to explain this hurt, I pray about it, I can't seem to cry yet and that's something that I do often. I've often wondered just why I can't cry about it. But thank you so much for what you have just said. You have helped me so much. I think that I might be able to get some sleep tonight finally. I haven't been sleeping, eating, really just doing anything at all. I will beat it, I hope. Thanks for the advice!
again thank you

Williston, SC

#6 Sep 16, 2008
Amanda wrote:
I went through a divorce, but I knew well before we made the decision to divorce, sp it really didn't take me long to get over it. It sounds like you were realy in love with this person, and all I can tell you is to keep your head up and realize that life goes on. I wish you the best of luck in getting you life back on track.
When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
Yes, I was and still am in love with him. I don't know how to deal with it. I want to thank you. If I were a bad woman then I could go on and say the he** with it, but the Love still has my heart and soul. But thank you so much for you advice. There are some good people in this town afterall. I might be speaking to early because someone will get on here and trash me and they wont even know who I am. But again, thank you all for saying just what I needed to hear. God Bless
friend

United States

#7 Sep 16, 2008
LIFE AFTER DIVORCE wrote:
I would like to know this and when does the hurt go away if you still are in love with the other person?
You are a real person,not a flake. To me you are true and brave to make so sincere a statement as you do in public and for that we feel your greivance and pain.
GOD moves in mysteriouse ways, so keep your eyes open and heart pure,something good is with you dear.
Try something new,always activities and hobbies can be very rewarding !
unknown

Williston, SC

#8 Sep 16, 2008
the hurt never goes away when a grandchild is involved,and the grandparents never get to see the child,thats not fair.the divorce was not our fault.
only imagine

United States

#9 Sep 16, 2008
what it would be like if they was kids involved..that would hurt even worse!
who knows

Williston, SC

#10 Sep 16, 2008
if 2 people are in love when do they call it quits? NEVER
loving it

Williston, SC

#11 Sep 16, 2008
LIFE AFTER DIVORCE wrote:
I would like to know this and when does the hurt go away if you still are in love with the other person?
its gets better the minute the piece of sh** walks out the door. believe me.
The Hurt Remains

Williston, SC

#12 Sep 21, 2008
for quite some time. I have been divorced for several years and I am just finding that I am healing. I did just like you; couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't smile or laugh; but, I got up each day and faced the new day. My biggest help was close friends, family, and my church. I tried a few dates but you will know when you are ready. Don't rush the dating because you need time to heal so that you do not tarnish a new relationship with your past. I still care for my Ex but I can honestly say that I think about him less each day; the way he left bothers me more; no concern for my well-being...during the divorce I was too distraught to fight for myself; I just wanted it over so that I could face tomorrow. Believe me if you know Christ you will come through stronger than before...Trust is not easy after a divorce especially with infidelity but remember that there are good people out there. I prefer to be alone right now. You will know what you need. Spend time on your knees with your sorrow. The crying will come; I experienced wailing and consuming grief. I went through the stages of grief. I aged myself quite a bit, too. Don't grieve too long. Find joy around you and keep yourself busy. There is a light beyond your grief and I am starting to experience that now. I will pray for you because I do know your feelings and you do sound like a good person. Keep your head up and SMILE...Frown lines aren't so pretty... I know... Oh, and by the way... my Ex tried to get me back...and, I said NO.
look

United States

#13 Sep 21, 2008
divorces get easyer ever time.ho ho i no for sure. ben thrue 2 the thing i ask myself was how can i care for someone that dont wont me.its just waste of your time. if th left you you beter than th are anyways you didnt need them before you met them .and you still dont.get out forget the past live for today.ha i no everything is beter down the road.lot beter you will se.you wont be fooled again.i bet.....
yeah

Hyden, KY

#14 Sep 22, 2008
I wish you luck.
Divorced

Netherlands

#15 Sep 22, 2008
It was more horrable than I imagened at first , but things are great now and i dont even miss them at all not one bit.Im much happyer with who im with now

“Trouble in the flesh”

Since: Jan 08

Hazard

#16 Sep 22, 2008
I goes away. My advice is to ho around a bit, and it'll fade.
grace

Plano, TX

#17 Sep 23, 2008
I've heard it said it takes women 7-10 years to get over a divorce. And men about 1 year. Mostly because women invest more emotionally than men do. It took me close to 10 years. And that was even after I remarried. It was not about missing the ex or even loving him, it was more about how I felt like I was a failure as a person. I think a lot of how you will feel is closely tied to your values and whether or not you are living up to your values. Then one day, I decided to tell myself that I forgive myself for whatever mistakes I made. Also, I thought if this was another person would I constantly punish them like I was doing to myself (mentally)? The answer was definitely not. I would still love that person. I decided to treat myself like I would a good friend, with compassion. And that was the best thing I ever did for myself. Hope this helps you
happy

Williston, SC

#18 Sep 23, 2008
it really does make you feel like a failure,or it did me,and it's alot harder when there are little kids....For a long time i thought i was a complete failure,my kids didn't have their daddy,then i seen it was his fault also and he knew where they were if he wanted to see them...it's been almost 8 years and i've been i single mother until about 2 yrs ago...i hope you the best of luck.....and there is good men out there just have fun and enjoy life he'll come to you
hey there

United States

#19 Sep 26, 2008
ive been there...i was so scared of being alone but each day tht he was gone i kept gettn over it and i met another man and i thot he loved me and then now we broke up...im going thrue it again...yes ur frnds are very important to have wen u go thru this but really GOD is these best frnd and comforter you could have...i learned one thing dont go looking for love it will come to u when its ur time...but i have to be honest i hate being alone...but i dont wont to make another bad choice nad get hurt again so get out enjoy life...also get the song by angela hacker its called total loss tht will help u it has me...u may have to download it i did u will love it...so take time for urself and be careful there are alot of fake men outthere...good luck
now

United States

#20 Sep 26, 2008
the hurt will go away when you figure out that what you had in the first place wasnt worth having.

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