just pooped so hard it broke my toilet

just pooped so hard it broke my toilet

Posted in the Huntington Forum

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poopin all day

Huntington, WV

#1 Jun 8, 2012
I recently dropped off a loaf of poop into my toilet from the cozy confines of my butthole. then when I got up and tried to flush it got clogged then something exploded and the poop blew out of the toilet onto my head and all over the wall. now my toilet is broke and I have been poopin in the bath tub and handling my logs by picking them up with my bear hands and walking them all the way outside to my neighbor's garbage can. then yesterday some kid on a bike caught me with a hand full of poop and asked what it was. I told him it was a candy bar. he asked if he could take a bite and I said no because I sneezed on it and he might get a cold if he eats it. however he insisted that he wasn't afraid of a miniscule cold if he would get the reward of a sweet treat before supper. then I came clean and told him it was my poop. he then shook his head from side to side slowly as if to show dissapointment for what I had done. I then walked away with my head lowered in shame.
wow

Charleston, WV

#2 Jun 8, 2012
thats a crappy story
poopin all day

Huntington, WV

#3 Jun 8, 2012
wow wrote:
thats a crappy story
BWAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHAhahah ah brilliant
Level 2

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#4 Jun 8, 2012
That's sick get a life and stfu
1 post removed

Level 4

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#6 Jun 8, 2012
poopin all day wrote:
I recently dropped off a loaf of poop into my toilet from the cozy confines of my butthole. then when I got up and tried to flush it got clogged then something exploded and the poop blew out of the toilet onto my head and all over the wall. now my toilet is broke and I have been poopin in the bath tub and handling my logs by picking them up with my bear hands and walking them all the way outside to my neighbor's garbage can. then yesterday some kid on a bike caught me with a hand full of poop and asked what it was. I told him it was a candy bar. he asked if he could take a bite and I said no because I sneezed on it and he might get a cold if he eats it. however he insisted that he wasn't afraid of a miniscule cold if he would get the reward of a sweet treat before supper. then I came clean and told him it was my poop. he then shook his head from side to side slowly as if to show dissapointment for what I had done. I then walked away with my head lowered in shame.
That's impressive. I've always heard those toilets at the Special Ed schools are tough to break.
me too

Bluefield, WV

#7 Jun 8, 2012
I had to buy a new one
eek

Huntington, WV

#8 Jun 8, 2012
When I was young I was working, going to school, and hanging out with friends. Not posting idiotic stuff on the Internet. Try to get a life that doesn't consist of posting on topix all the time. Your life will be a lot happier

Level 4

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#9 Jun 8, 2012
eek wrote:
When I was young I was working, going to school, and hanging out with friends. Not posting idiotic stuff on the Internet. Try to get a life that doesn't consist of posting on topix all the time. Your life will be a lot happier
And yet, here you sit, on the internet, responding to a thread that was conceivably written by a 10 year old (at least I hope he's that young), and you apparently had enough time to review enough idiotic threads and comments to come to the conclusion that they're "posting all day." With that said, good luck on getting your life lesson across.
JP

Ardsley, NY

#10 Jun 8, 2012
Says the person that has posted 662 comments. Guess you're one of them too!
Outta left field wrote:
<quoted text>And yet, here you sit, on the internet, responding to a thread that was conceivably written by a 10 year old (at least I hope he's that young), and you apparently had enough time to review enough idiotic threads and comments to come to the conclusion that they're "posting all day." With that said, good luck on getting your life lesson across.

Level 4

Since: May 12

Location hidden

#11 Jun 8, 2012
JP wrote:
Says the person that has posted 662 comments. Guess you're one of them too!
<quoted text>
Yes, but I'm also not the one criticizing others who do, or telling them to get a life. Huge difference.
poop king

Lerona, WV

#12 Jun 8, 2012
Im the poop King Bow Down
ha ha

Richmond, VA

#13 Jun 8, 2012
hide it from spleencage i read on here that shes the citys turd burglar
terry

Huntington, WV

#14 Jun 8, 2012
eek wrote:
When I was young I was working, going to school, and hanging out with friends. Not posting idiotic stuff on the Internet. Try to get a life that doesn't consist of posting on topix all the time. Your life will be a lot happier
well your not young anymore are you? your old and decrepid. angry at strangers on the internet because they post threads that you don't think are valid. newsflash loser, it's not 1960 anymore you dirtbag, kids don't have to play in the mud anymore like you animals from back then did.
ilovepeps

Saint Albans, WV

#15 Jun 8, 2012
poopin all day wrote:
I recently dropped off a loaf of poop into my toilet from the cozy confines of my butthole. then when I got up and tried to flush it got clogged then something exploded and the poop blew out of the toilet onto my head and all over the wall. now my toilet is broke and I have been poopin in the bath tub and handling my logs by picking them up with my bear hands and walking them all the way outside to my neighbor's garbage can. then yesterday some kid on a bike caught me with a
hand full of poop and asked what it was. I told
him it was a candy bar. he asked if he could take
a bite and I said no because I sneezed on it and he might get a cold if he eats it. however he
insisted that he wasn't afraid of a miniscule cold if he would get the reward of a sweet treat before supper. then I came clean and told him it was my poop. he then shook his head from side to side
slowly as if to show dissapointment for what I had done. I then walked away with my head
lowered in shame.
keep your head up brother! nevermind these judgemental self righteous morons, I applaud your honesty only a real man drops a deuce powerful enough to blow up a commode and for that I salute you! Just promise me you'll never stop pooping OK?
Crack Licker

Ona, WV

#16 Jun 9, 2012
You guys are all so shitty!

“Often copied, never duplicated”

Level 8

Since: Nov 11

BelAir, CA

#17 Jun 9, 2012
So how did it feel when you actually shi* your brains out. I'm surprised you had enough remaining grey matter to make even the smallest of thuds.
Frank Weber-Select

Charleston, WV

#18 Jun 9, 2012
You must have just shiit me!! Did I fu€k your wife? I [email protected] all but my own!
Mark Szymanski

Buffalo, NY

#19 Dec 3, 2012
I just needed to bump this thread to the top of the list! <:D
2 posts removed
Shaktasta

United States

#22 Jun 13, 2016
One time I pooped so hard, it shot through the Earth all the way to China! My Asian cousin called me after, saying a poop exploded out of his floor. I guiltily admitted that was me. He asked what I ate, I told him Chinese. We haven't spoken for 10 years.
Dub

Virginia Beach, VA

#23 Jun 13, 2016
poopin all day wrote:
I recently dropped off a loaf of poop into my toilet from the cozy confines of my butthole. then when I got up and tried to flush it got clogged then something exploded and the poop blew out of the toilet onto my head and all over the wall. now my toilet is broke and I have been poopin in the bath tub and handling my logs by picking them up with my bear hands and walking them all the way outside to my neighbor's garbage can. then yesterday some kid on a bike caught me with a hand full of poop and asked what it was. I told him it was a candy bar. he asked if he could take a bite and I said no because I sneezed on it and he might get a cold if he eats it. however he insisted that he wasn't afraid of a miniscule cold if he would get the reward of a sweet treat before supper. then I came clean and told him it was my poop. he then shook his head from side to side slowly as if to show dissapointment for what I had done. I then walked away with my head lowered in shame.
Yesterday I had lunch with my friends from WV... Soon after lunch I began to feel a poop was coming on, so I was off to the pooper with hand on stomach, in full stride. I made it to the bathroom and clutched the doorhandle and flung it open with a thunderous boom! I entered the first stall only to find that some other pooper had used all of the TP. I was in a frenzy at this point. I considered pooping with no TP and duck-walking to the next stall, but then I began to worry about other poopers coming into the equation, so I made my move. I took several strides towards the other stall and just as I made it in, I looked at the dispenser and there it was, like a white wedding dress, a brand new roll! I quickly hunched over my target and began to let it all go...Keep in mind that I never sit on the throne completly, unless I am at home. I pushed a few times, but nothing would come out. It then occurred to me that I had a Problem.. I pushed and pushed until I had beads of sweat dripping down my brow... yes, this one was a true log. At last the turd was exposed to the fresh air and I peeked between my legs -- only to frighten myself. Gentlemen, this one was a record breaker for me. It was the largest turd ever. I soon realized that I was in for a huge splash from the massive thing falling to the water. I quickly came up with a plan. I was going to leap forward to escape the poop bomb's blast. But I knew this was going to take perfect timing so I gave a final push and felt the it break free. I leaped forward as far as could only to become ghostly afraid -- I never heard a splash.. I knew something was not right. There was no way this log could have been streamlined enough to not splash. The suspense grew and I knew I had to do it. I slowly, so slowly looked in my underwear that was down to my feet... to my amazement, there was nothing there! I quickly looked in the throat of the toilet. Still no signs..What has happened to my poop, I wondered. I was a bit disappointed because I wanted to tell some of my carp buddies to go look at my freshly made trophy. I wiped and to even more surprise there was nothing there. At this point I was truly disturbed. What the heck was going on in this stall? Was there a taking place? Was there a lurking turd burglar? I flushed the toilet paper and turned to leave out of the stall... and there it was! This thing was across the stall against the wall in front of the toilet. We are not talking about a small stall here, the wall was a good eight feet from the throne toilet bowl. Somehow, without me seeing, the turd was flung between my legs (missing the ol' jewels and other parts). Never again will I eat Carpfish, navy beans, with onions with hot sauce..

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