men lying about being married

men lying about being married

Posted in the Huntington Forum

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dyno girl

United States

#1 Sep 21, 2011
Can someone please explain to me why do men lie about being married when they meet you?
been there

United States

#2 Sep 21, 2011
Because that's what most men do. Its simply the nature of the beast. And trust me, as a gay man I've been lied too, also, and still don't understand it myself.
dyno girl

United States

#3 Sep 21, 2011
Ok, here's the story i'm 48 he's 44 we met through work. He travels a lot with his job i can remember point blank asking him if he were married he said no. We start seeing each other i start really liking him than certain things don't start making sense. When he's out of town as in back home he doesn't answer his phone or txt back until he is on his way back. Once again i ask the? get the same answer, i even told him if he were i'd understand that sometimes people get into situations they can't get out of. Then i find out from friends at work that know him that he is.
Wow

Peach Creek, WV

#4 Sep 21, 2011
Maybe you are picking the wrong men.
dyno girl

United States

#5 Sep 21, 2011
I guess! And its not like i'm after his money. I
make as much as he does.
bAnonymous

New York, NY

#6 Sep 21, 2011
Yeah, but would you sleep with him if he were married?
dyno girl

United States

#7 Sep 21, 2011
If i'd known he were married no, i wouldn't have.
bAnonymous

Troy, VA

#8 Sep 21, 2011
Probably the reason he lied to you, then. Men are very simple. When they think they'll get into trouble or won't get something they want (from a woman, I mean), they will lie. It sucks, but it's true for the most part. Women aren't any better, although I've not met a woman who lied about her marital status.
A wife

Manakin Sabot, VA

#9 Sep 22, 2011
The real question is, now that you know....what are you going to do about it?
Will you be dumping him? If not then YOUR just as much in the wrong as he is. At this point your hands are clean, you did the right thing, you asked, and when things started looking funny, you inquired until you came to the truth, so you have done nothing wrong and should be commended, the problem is where you go from here, I know its hard but you have to break it off.
Men (And women) can be real dogs, the reason they lie is simple..........they know darn good and well that they are not going to get what they want if they are honest, so lying gets them what they want. Its a sign of weakness, insecurity, and mental issues. When one can not commit to the relationship they are currently in, they are NOT to be trusted. If he is cheating with YOU then he may very well be having relations with others as well, which could be prostitutes or any strange out on the road.........which puts YOU at risk of STD's.
Do yourself a favor, cut him off and set up a appointment with your doctor for a full STD panel. As for him, he is scum, and not worth your attention.
Jocelyn

United States

#10 Sep 22, 2011
A wife wrote:
The real question is, now that you know....what are you going to do about it?
Will you be dumping him? If not then YOUR just as much in the wrong as he is. At this point your hands are clean, you did the right thing, you asked, and when things started looking funny, you inquired until you came to the truth, so you have done nothing wrong and should be commended, the problem is where you go from here, I know its hard but you have to break it off.
Men (And women) can be real dogs, the reason they lie is simple..........they know darn good and well that they are not going to get what they want if they are honest, so lying gets them what they want. Its a sign of weakness, insecurity, and mental issues. When one can not commit to the relationship they are currently in, they are NOT to be trusted. If he is cheating with YOU then he may very well be having relations with others as well, which could be prostitutes or any strange out on the road.........which puts YOU at risk of STD's.
Do yourself a favor, cut him off and set up a appointment with your doctor for a full STD panel. As for him, he is scum, and not worth your attention.
Great reply and advice. You touched on all relative points and nailed it and strongly suggest anyone, male or female to take this very wise woman's outstanding advice.
Gross

United States

#11 Sep 22, 2011
been there wrote:
Because that's what most men do. Its simply the nature of the beast. And trust me, as a gay man I've been lied too, also, and still don't understand it myself.
please dont talk about how ur gay.thats nasty,gross,offensive, and makes me and every one else wanna vomit. U r sick and need help.
Mace Windu

Cincinnati, OH

#12 Sep 22, 2011
Gross wrote:
<quoted text>please dont talk about how ur gay.thats nasty,gross,offensive, and makes me and every one else wanna vomit. U r sick and need help.
Wow. What an awful thing to say. Gay people don't make me wanna vomit but hateful, ignorant, homophobic, narrow-minded, uneducated, redneck idiots do.
bAnonymous

Troy, VA

#13 Sep 22, 2011
Mace Windu wrote:
<quoted text>Wow. What an awful thing to say. Gay people don't make me wanna vomit but hateful, ignorant, homophobic, narrow-minded, uneducated, redneck idiots do.
^ This.
been there

United States

#14 Sep 22, 2011
Mace Windu wrote:
<quoted text>
Wow. What an awful thing to say. Gay people don't make me wanna vomit but hateful, ignorant, homophobic, narrow-minded, uneducated, redneck idiots do.
Thank you, Mace. I appreciate you but I don't pay any attention to people like that unless its being directed towards a young teen who is being bullied and finds themselves on the verge of committing suicide based on the venomous comments from others. I can only hope that some she loves who at some point in their lives that they're gay only to experience that same kind of hate. Thank you again, Mace, and I appreciate your kind words and support.
been there

United States

#15 Sep 22, 2011
I meant to thank banonymous. NOT Mace. Sorry b.
been there

United States

#16 Sep 22, 2011
THANK YOU MACE. Lol. Responding by phone kinda blows.
Straight

United States

#17 Sep 22, 2011
been there wrote:
THANK YOU MACE. Lol. Responding by phone kinda blows.
blows...eww...u r pathetic ..i bet thats the most frequent word outta yer pretty little mouth..
been there

United States

#18 Sep 22, 2011
To dyno girl, I apologize that YOUR post has been hijacked and that the focus is now on me and hope you find some resolution to your issue. I wish you well.
dyno girl

United States

#19 Sep 22, 2011
Don't worry about it and yes i made an appt and he's not worthy of my time.
FreeBird

Hurricane, WV

#20 Sep 23, 2011
dyno girl wrote:
Don't worry about it and yes i made an appt and he's not worthy of my time.
I know exactly what you have been through. I dated a guy 25yrs ago and out of the blue he contacted me. I didn't even know where he was or what ever happened to him until he contacted me. Told me that he wanted to see me, I asked if he was married..he replied back with I am getting a divorce. I assumed that the divorce was pending...when in fact..they had never filed and was currently married. I didn't find any of it out until we had been seeing one another for a few months. I was stupid and trusted this person more than I had ever trusted anyone in my life. Turns out..he is certainly NOT the man that I knew years ago, has turned into a money making monster, only cares about appearances and what he wanted. He has been married for 20yrs, he caught her cheating on him and pretty much decided to use me as payback. NICE...isn't it?? Totally broke my heart. In the end, the wife and I had a conversation, he had of course been lying like a dog to both of us, they decided to go to counseling and make their marriage work. Whatever..it just pisses me off that he dragged me into their mess with lies. I would have NEVER been with him if I had known the facts up front. I have NEVER been that kind of a person. Of course, he walks off without any explanations and acts like he did nothing wrong. Worse part..they go to church and hold positions in their church. I just don't know how people live with themselves knowing they are going to intentionally hurt others. Karma is a bitch. You and I both are better off finding out when we did and removing ourselves from the situation. If those men would cheat on their wives, lie to them and hurt them...they would have done it to us as well. Not to mention they are men without integrity!!! Like you..I asked repeatedly about his divorce and was always told I am getting divorce, believe that, it is true...LIARS!!

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