my wife is delusional
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trying to live normal

Huntington, WV

#1 Jan 23, 2012
does anybody know or have ever livied with some one who is delusional.i am and its geting worse shes not so bad she cant drive or function in public but she is completely convinced that im cheating and it is completly not true it has effected every one around us even my family and hers my kids also are slowly being afected .i do the best i can but it is hard she is realy convinced and it is embaresing for me to see her like this i cant see it getting better she wont admit it but it is clear to all around us .she will find people who dont know me and try to convince them that im a cheater this has be going on for some time now it was the reason we divorced .i found and counselling page on internet and there was a man who had said the same thing was happening to him .how do i get her help?
Ummmm

Addison, NY

#2 Jan 23, 2012
If you are already divorced then how can you be cheating on her? Did you two get back together? Just curious. If you aren't together then I don't see how it could be a problem really. If you are still together then here is my thoughts... I have a VERY honest, devoted, affectionate, and loving husband. I know this. I know with every fiber of my being that he would NEVER cheat on me. Do I worry about it anyway, YES! I am a very insecure person with a very low self esteem and sometimes I convince myself that I don't deserve him and he will realize that and leave me or cheat, even though deep down i know it isn't true. He doesn't absolutely nothing to make me worry, it just happens because of my insecurities and that could be her problem as well. If this is the case you cant make her nit worry but you may be able to convince her you aren't cheating right now by always letting her know where you are, being very affectionate, tell her you love her many many times a day, always be honest with her and then explain to her that her insecurities are effecting your relationship. Explain that while you are not cheating that her accusations are not only worrying you but also driving you away from her and because of that if she continues you may have to end the relationship for your own sanity but assure her that is the last thing you want but you need her trust just as she needs yours. To me it sounds like she may suffer from depression and if so it is common to worry about things like that. I would strongly suggest that she see a doctor regarding her paranoia, anxiety, and possible depression and that you both seek counseling together. Explain that it would mean a lot for her to go to counseling with you to help her gain the ability to trust you and strengthen your relationship. If all of this isn't true then unfortunately the only other reason she would be that sure you cheated when you haven't is because she has cheated and she is transferring her feelings of guilt and the fact ahe was unfaithful onto you. The "if I would do it to him he has to be doing it to me" idea. But while that is a possible explanation it sounds more to me like scenario one with the insecurities and depression. Show her this post. I used to be much worse about worrying about my husband than i am now and I can honestly say it is so freeing the more i trust him and the more secure I become with our relationship and it has stregthened our relationship ten fold. I am sure that letting go of those thoughts and trusting you would do the same for him. She can't expect to let go of those feelings over night but with proper counseling and possibly the proper medication she can get better with it and will be a much happier person and you will have a better relationship.
Ummmm

Addison, NY

#3 Jan 23, 2012
Also, if you are divorced but still together in a committed relationship the one very good way to prove to her you love her and aren't cheating would be remarrying her. If you were married but aren't now you are just together, that may be a major source of her fears. If you would ne willing to remarry I am sure that would help tremendously and mean a lot! But that is up to you!
jerold

United States

#4 Jan 24, 2012
trying to live normal wrote:
does anybody know or have ever livied with some one who is delusional.i am and its geting worse shes not so bad she cant drive or function in public but she is completely convinced that im cheating and it is completly not true it has effected every one around us even my family and hers my kids also are slowly being afected .i do the best i can but it is hard she is realy convinced and it is embaresing for me to see her like this i cant see it getting better she wont admit it but it is clear to all around us .she will find people who dont know me and try to convince them that im a cheater this has be going on for some time now it was the reason we divorced .i found and counselling page on internet and there was a man who had said the same thing was happening to him .how do i get her help?
most women i know have mental problems...seriously. I am not gay or anything but honestly most of them are far more trouble than they are worth.
Hehe to you

Boynton Beach, FL

#5 Jan 24, 2012
Yes someone can have a delusional disorder. She needs to see a psychiatrist.
Rita

Clay, WV

#6 Jan 24, 2012
jerold wrote:
<quoted text>
most women i know have mental problems...seriously. I am not gay or anything but honestly most of them are far more trouble than they are worth.
you are correct.but most of the time it's the men in our lives that make us so damn crazy.
wow

United States

#7 Jan 24, 2012
She is propably cheating!
Observer

Blacklick, OH

#8 Jan 24, 2012
I used to date a woman with multiple personalities and it was like having sex with a different lady every night! WIN!

Level 5

Since: Oct 11

United States

#9 Jan 24, 2012
jerold wrote:
<quoted text>
most women i know have mental problems...seriously. I am not gay or anything but honestly most of them are far more trouble than they are worth.
Agreed.

Oh, and you will never be able to do anything to gain her trust. So, either leave her, or have fun and cheat, lol!
Waiting for Internet

Huntington, WV

#10 Jan 24, 2012
I'm a woman, and I've got to say....most women are crazy. Flat out nuts.

I hate to say that....I think maybe one out of ten men are nutty enough to behave in ways that really hurt their life (reckless driving, bad money management, etc.) but MOST are sensible enough to take care of money, hold onto a home....

Most women? uh-uh. You can give them a beautiful home, a nice car, lovely furniture, pretty clothes....and 8 out of 10 will find a way to screw it up for themselves. Most...honestly....never really get past the reasoning ability of a ten year old girl.

Want proof? How many men do you know who are still playing with glitter glue and stickers? Look how many GROWN WOMEN spend hours on things like that.

Most of'em ARE delusional.
Rita

Clay, WV

#11 Jan 24, 2012
Waiting for Internet wrote:
I'm a woman, and I've got to say....most women are crazy. Flat out nuts.
I hate to say that....I think maybe one out of ten men are nutty enough to behave in ways that really hurt their life (reckless driving, bad money management, etc.) but MOST are sensible enough to take care of money, hold onto a home....
Most women? uh-uh. You can give them a beautiful home, a nice car, lovely furniture, pretty clothes....and 8 out of 10 will find a way to screw it up for themselves. Most...honestly....never really get past the reasoning ability of a ten year old girl.
Want proof? How many men do you know who are still playing with glitter glue and stickers? Look how many GROWN WOMEN spend hours on things like that.
Most of'em ARE delusional.
I agree with every ward.but I don't play with glitter.lol but yes I feel so crazy sometimes I don't know if I'm coming or going.
Hmmmmm

Fincastle, VA

#12 Jan 24, 2012
My son is dating a woman like that, and he is crazy about the girl and basically kisses her rear end to make her happy 24/7. It is driving him nuts to be constantly accused of cheating when he is not. He had wanted to marry her, but then that behavior started, and now he just wants out of the relationship even though he loves her.

I personally think anyone who does that is either cheating themselves and projecting their own behavior, is mentally ill, is pathologically insecure, or is just trying to control and manipulate the other person. None of those things are okay.

Either way, it may be common behavior, but it certainly is not normal behavior. Do NOT marry her again unless she undergoes therapy and stops, because she will only make you miserable.
1 post removed
Waiting for Internet

Huntington, WV

#14 Jan 24, 2012
As a kindness...to the young men....listen to an old woman....

If u are in a relationship with a young woman and she is constantly "checking up" on you, "tracking you down", grilling you, hanging on you, quizzing you about her friends, tweeting, FB'ing about you...drop her. Just cut it off and leave it alone.

She will NEVER get better. Only older. That sort of personality is formed young, and it only gets worse. It really isn't your fault she is like that. It's born into some. Listen carefully...it MAKES NO DIFFERENCE if her suspicions are well-founded. It DOES NOT MATTER if you ARE "cheating",(even tho personally I believe you can only actually CHEAT if you are engaged with an actual ring or legitimately married, all the rest is just playtime, really) for both men & women.

It makes no dif if the girl is beautiful or plain. A woman that acts like that because of suspicions...is a woman you will NEVER REALLY RESPECT. She will sense this...and it will make her crazier and she will make you more and more miserable and turn your hair grey and and torment you til you die.

A woman who honestly suspects you are cheating (and isn't a nut, like I described) will find out the truth in ways that you will never know. She will NEVER LET ON that she suspects, because she respects herself and ALSO (just in case she's wrong) she will keep it quiet because she wants to KEEP YOUR RESPECT. If she finds out she was wrong...you'll never know what happened, and one day you'll come home and she'll be EXTRA nice for no reason. "I made you a sandwich. Isn't your game about to start?" Lucky you.

If she finds out you ARE cheating...pity on you brother...because it won't be constant whining to her friends and texting you 87 times a day. I do not know WHY women do that, and they wear me out talking about it all the time.

You heard it from a woman.
Opinion

Reedy, WV

#15 Jan 24, 2012
Waiting for Internet wrote:
I'm a woman, and I've got to say....most women are crazy. Flat out nuts.
I hate to say that....I think maybe one out of ten men are nutty enough to behave in ways that really hurt their life (reckless driving, bad money management, etc.) but MOST are sensible enough to take care of money, hold onto a home....
Most women? uh-uh. You can give them a beautiful home, a nice car, lovely furniture, pretty clothes....and 8 out of 10 will find a way to screw it up for themselves. Most...honestly....never really get past the reasoning ability of a ten year old girl.
Want proof? How many men do you know who are still playing with glitter glue and stickers? Look how many GROWN WOMEN spend hours on things like that.
Most of'em ARE delusional.
I think women are more emotional than men but men can be just as delusional as women. Want proof? Speedos. Nuff said. lol
Waiting for Internet

Huntington, WV

#16 Jan 24, 2012
Touché! Ha! Can't argue with that...lol
What

United States

#17 Jan 24, 2012
What about "crazy women" who flat out caught the bastard? Hundreds of phone calls, text messages, etc...and he says "nothing happened"
Screw his whining about being asked what he's doing! If he doesnt like it, he can get the hell out. And has been told this, in EXACTLY those words. Your definition of "cheating" may be off a little bit.
Waiting for Internet

Huntington, WV

#18 Jan 24, 2012
What wrote:
What about "crazy women" who flat out caught the bastard? Hundreds of phone calls, text messages, etc...and he says "nothing happened"
Screw his whining about being asked what he's doing! If he doesnt like it, he can get the hell out. And has been told this, in EXACTLY those words. Your definition of "cheating" may be off a little bit.
If you meant my def, it's just my opinion that you can only cheat on someone that you are married to or engaged with an actual ring and a wedding date in mind, and not just putting a wedding off for years and years. That's just my own personal belief. To me, dating is dating. People should respect each other, and be kind...but they don't OWN the other one. An actual commitment is different.

I realize...believe me, I do, that almost no one agrees with me on that point. Most people think three dates equals a license to tattoo your name on someone. I just don't feel that way.

I'm sorry someone treated you badly. Just wipe'em off your shoe and hold your head up, and good luck next time! There's plenty of fish in the sea.
hidden dragon

Saint Albans, WV

#19 Jan 24, 2012
Rita wrote:
<quoted text>you are correct.but most of the time it's the men in our lives that make us so damn crazy.
Amen. It is the men that so very often make us women "crazy". I'm very lucky to have the husband I do. He is my lover, my support and my very best friend. I couldn't have asked for anything better but even he can make me crazy sometimes. Must be the "Y" chromosome.
jerry vernon

Boynton Beach, FL

#20 Jan 24, 2012
i flat out quit dating. Two years ago i decided enough was enough. I work long hours - 16 hours per day. I am a clean, honest, non smoker, non drinker 33 years old. i keep a clean home and car. i respect and treat women well.

I have went through so many dates that were everything from just habitual liars, pill addicted women, alcoholics, lazy with no job, kids by several different men, you name it i have seen it. I can honestly say I have not ever had one decent girl around here that has goals.
I quit. when i certain needs get the best of me i take care of it myself.
1 post removed
Roofman

Huntington, WV

#22 Jan 24, 2012
trying to live normal wrote:
does anybody know or have ever livied with some one who is delusional.i am and its geting worse shes not so bad she cant drive or function in public but she is completely convinced that im cheating and it is completly not true it has effected every one around us even my family and hers my kids also are slowly being afected .i do the best i can but it is hard she is realy convinced and it is embaresing for me to see her like this i cant see it getting better she wont admit it but it is clear to all around us .she will find people who dont know me and try to convince them that im a cheater this has be going on for some time now it was the reason we divorced .i found and counselling page on internet and there was a man who had said the same thing was happening to him .how do i get her help?
Steve Estep u are a sociopath and need major help. Amy u gonna let him deny u like this?

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