Help me please I am Cheating with CoWorker

Posted in the Huntington Forum

First Prev
of 6
Next Last
Sandra

Blairsville, PA

#3 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
I am lost.
I am having an affair with a woman who is much younger than me. I work with her. I have been married for a long time (20+years).
My wife has not really done anything to cause me to stray, but there is a lack of passion between us. I want to cut it off with the younger woman but I feel so alive when we are together. It is crazy. The conversations, the touching. It is so passionate but on the other hand, I do not want to hurt my wife.
Idk why I am on here venting, but I can't tell anyone I know about this.
How can I get rid of these feelings of excitement I have for my co-worker? I want my marriage to feel like this again. Grrr. I hate this.
I won't judge you. You're a guy so you get a free pass in a weird way. Don't tell yiur wife a thing BUT break it off with your affair partner. What your wife doesn't know won't hurt her but ur gonna get ccaught if you don't stop.
exmistress

Proctorville, OH

#4 Aug 28, 2013
I am not going to berate you...tell you you're a pig for cheating on your wife. We work 40+ hours a week with our co-workers and things happen.

I had a 5 year long affair with a former boss of mine. I can tell you that you're mistress knows deep down that you will never leave your wife. It just doesn't happen. I knew going into the affair that he would never leave her. I did fall in love with him, as he did me, but too much at stake for both of us to leave (his marriage, my relationship). I am not proud of what I did, but it happened all the same. My advice to you is that if you are for sure never going to leave your marriage, end it now with your co-worker before you are in WAY too deep. Yes, she will be hurt, angry, feel betrayed, but you need to do it. End it before your wife finds out about it and makes the decision for you. Good luck!
realitycheck

Huntington, WV

#5 Aug 28, 2013
If you def want to save your marriage then I would cut it off with the coworker and just tell her you need time to think about things as there are a lot of people's feelings involved and you would like to take things slow without jumping into any kind of another relationship until you are out of the one you are in, therefore you are buying yourself some time to try to gather your thoughts and see what you really want... On another note I would do that fairly quickly tho before your wife finds out and your marriage is over because she can probably tell that something is up, so go get you one last piece of ass and go back to your wife for the time being until you figure YOU out..
1 post removed
no username

Hurricane, WV

#7 Aug 28, 2013
where ya work at? I think my hubby has been stepping out on me with someone bout 15 years younger than me. sounds like you could be him...hmm???
co-worker

Waynesboro, VA

#8 Aug 28, 2013
Its too late i found out today im pregnant and your gonna pay for all of this. i told you if you werent serious in the beginning not to get this started but you said you were very serious..... im going to give you 1 day to tell her or i will........
Dumbwhitty

Huntington, WV

#9 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
I am lost.
I am having an affair with a woman who is much younger than me. I work with her. I have been married for a long time (20+years).
My wife has not really done anything to cause me to stray, but there is a lack of passion between us. I want to cut it off with the younger woman but I feel so alive when we are together. It is crazy. The conversations, the touching. It is so passionate but on the other hand, I do not want to hurt my wife.
Idk why I am on here venting, but I can't tell anyone I know about this.
How can I get rid of these feelings of excitement I have for my co-worker? I want my marriage to feel like this again. Grrr. I hate this.
Do not cut it off you might bleed to death.
Psycho

Mars, PA

#10 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
Thank you people for not judging me. I was not looking forward to being bashed. I want to "bash" my feelings for the one I work along side of.
I wish I would have never done this. With any luck, I can make a clean break and my wife will never find out.
I will have to deal with my feelings of loss and that is going to really stink but it will be nothing compared to my wife's feelings of hurt should she find out.
If u want the feelings back with your wife, than u need to start the romance!! Trust me she probably wants it too, she is just waiting for u to make the first move!!

Wouldn't hurt to at least try!!
rescare

Charleston, WV

#11 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
I am lost.

I am having an affair with a woman who is much younger than me. I work with her. I have been married for a long time (20+years).

My wife has not really done anything to cause me to stray, but there is a lack of passion between us. I want to cut it off with the younger woman but I feel so alive when we are together. It is crazy. The conversations, the touching. It is so passionate but on the other hand, I do not want to hurt my wife.

Idk why I am on here venting, but I can't tell anyone I know about this.

How can I get rid of these feelings of excitement I have for my co-worker? I want my marriage to feel like this again. Grrr. I hate this.
U must work for rescare lol
huh

Lancaster, OH

#12 Aug 28, 2013
No, my vote is that he works for Amazon.
3 posts removed
been in your shoes

Saint Louis, MO

#16 Aug 28, 2013
what you r feeling isn't love. it is a dopamine rush, almost like drugs. come to think of it dopamine might be a drug..who knows. at any rate, your hooked right now and need to stop it cause it aint gonna work. you say u been married over 20 years so u must be in your 40s. u know the younger chick aint going to want you in another 10 years. think about it u might be throwing everything away for someone who aint going to want you down the road man.
PDX Dave

Portland, OR

#17 Aug 28, 2013
Well dude (if you really are dude) either enjoy what you're doing, or stop it. I don't see the problem here!
Lawless

Columbus, OH

#18 Aug 28, 2013
Is it possible that you are not in love with the co-worker, but in lust?

OK, you didn't invent cheating but you know your moral compass and in grading your own paper you see this is not right. But you can't unring a bell, so how to go forward, right?

Of course it is exciting to taste the forbidden fruit. What you have with your wife is a more mature love that replaces that giddy new feeling you may be having with your co-worker.

Remember that you've not seen your co-worker sick with flu at home in sweats. You don't have to pay bills with your co-worker. It's just a play time that you have with her, so naturally it will be different with your wife of 20+ years.

Best to break it off with the co-worker starting yesterday! Focus energy into your marriage to help revive it. Sometimes people forget what they did when they were dating and attracting a mate is what needs to be done to keep a mate. We get comfortable and caught up in the day to day stuff of life. If you want to keep your marriage this is what I would recommend.
Army Chick

Lavalette, WV

#19 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
I am lost.
I am having an affair with a woman who is much younger than me. I work with her. I have been married for a long time (20+years).
My wife has not really done anything to cause me to stray, but there is a lack of passion between us. I want to cut it off with the younger woman but I feel so alive when we are together. It is crazy. The conversations, the touching. It is so passionate but on the other hand, I do not want to hurt my wife.
Idk why I am on here venting, but I can't tell anyone I know about this.
How can I get rid of these feelings of excitement I have for my co-worker? I want my marriage to feel like this again. Grrr. I hate this.
You are disgusting! You are full of bs, typical man having a mid life crisis.
its not love

Proctorville, OH

#20 Aug 28, 2013
Npoe your not in love, its the fact that your able to sneak and have a private life without anyone knowing, it's the excitement of being sneaky that makes it interesting not your co-worker, but let me say this..if you get caught it wont be fun anymore and by that time you may already have blown things with your wife, like the above post said try for some romance in your marriage, you have become comfortable in your marriage, therefore, everyday is rountine for you guys, you need to change that in some sort of way, step out of the box but not with another woman, and if possible try to keep your distance away from the co-worker just explain to her and if she's any kind of a woman she will understand.. Good Luck
Sam Adams

Charleston, WV

#21 Aug 28, 2013
Why do you thing your wife isn't intimate with you anymore? Maybe She is getting it elsewhere too.
its not love

Proctorville, OH

#22 Aug 28, 2013
its not love wrote:
Nope your not in love, its the fact that your able to sneak and have a private life without anyone knowing, it's the excitement of being sneaky that makes it interesting not your co-worker, but let me say this..if you get caught it wont be fun anymore and by that time you may already have blown things with your wife, like the above post said try for some romance in your marriage, you have become comfortable in your marriage, therefore, everyday is rountine for you guys, you need to change that in some sort of way, step out of the box but not with another woman, and if possible try to keep your distance away from the co-worker just explain to her and if she's any kind of a woman she will understand.. Good Luck
edited by me
been there too

Conway, SC

#23 Aug 28, 2013
It's remarkable how many people have been in this same situation, including myself. Its easy to become close with a coworker. But trust me when she says she knows you won't leave home or she understands why you "can't" leave deep down she is hoping that will change. You are going to have to distance yourself from her, no texts, no calls, or visits. Someone may even have to transfer jobs. Take what this relationship has taught you home and make things right with your wife. Eventually the pain will ease and your home life will become much better. Remember there may be some anger at first with the g/f but it will get easier. Good luck to you!
1 post removed
Hammie Downs

Richmond, VA

#25 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
I suppose I will tell her tomorrow. I am depressed about telling her we have to stop seeing each other. Kinda nervous and sick about it honestly.
You need to find her someone else to love (shouldn't be hard, sounds like she has low standards). Give someone a hundred bucks to buy her dinner and a second date movie. He will get some for free and she will dump you. Tell her you just got ED also.

Done.
butch

Alexandria, VA

#26 Aug 28, 2013
its not love wrote:
Npoe your not in love, its the fact that your able to sneak and have a private life without anyone knowing, it's the excitement of being sneaky that makes it interesting not your co-worker, but let me say this..if you get caught it wont be fun anymore and by that time you may already have blown things with your wife, like the above post said try for some romance in your marriage, you have become comfortable in your marriage, therefore, everyday is rountine for you guys, you need to change that in some sort of way, step out of the box but not with another woman, and if possible try to keep your distance away from the co-worker just explain to her and if she's any kind of a woman she will understand.. Good Luck
Gf bh
Wish u luck

Greenville, VA

#27 Aug 28, 2013
Husband who strayed wrote:
I suppose I will tell her tomorrow. I am depressed about telling her we have to stop seeing each other. Kinda nervous and sick about it honestly.
if I was you I would be hoping she doesn't tell your wife. Also you may have to find another job, you really think it will be easy seeing her everyday? Plus if your wife does find out, the fact that u changed jobs would be proof you don't want to lose her and realize u did an awful thing. Maybe u and the wife can find some new ways to spice it up at home... And I agree with previous posters, it's not love. It's infatuation, and the sneaking around part that is creating a high for you. It's not the girl. What u have at home is real. Real life. Real problems. Real relationship. What u have with the other girl is all the fun and good with none of the bad. Good luck to you.

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker
First Prev
of 6
Next Last

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Huntington Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
WV Who do you support for U.S. Senate in West Virg... (Oct '10) 39 min Mgtn Res 58,338
HIMG what is up with the place lately 1 hr ace ventura 44
MacKenize Rush (Aug '13) 2 hr I know 11
Religion is BS 3 hr Namu Myoho Renge Kyo 2
Huntington Ink (Jan '13) 4 hr htownchica89 28
Eldonna Pennington. Courtney Hardy 4 hr CLH 8
Kenny Brown 6 hr questioning 1
•••
•••
•••

Huntington Jobs

•••
•••
•••

Huntington People Search

Addresses and phone numbers for FREE

•••

Huntington News, Events & Info

Click for news, events and info in Huntington
•••

Personal Finance

Mortgages [ See current mortgage rates ]
•••