Water Park??!!!
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rawtruth

Harlan, KY

#1 Jan 21, 2010
Just imagine your lying in the pool on a float soaking up the sun, enjoying the finer things Harlan has to offer. "AHHH" you think "How long we have waited on something nice like this in Harlan"? When you notice that you are no longer lying in the beautiful sunlight, but things have gone unexpectedly dark. You open one eye fully expecting to see some dreaded rain clouds blocking the precious rays of sunlight you've been basking in. But what you see is something huge standing at the edge of the pool. You cant make it out at first then as your eyes slowly adjust to the sunlight you realize that you are staring at the living proof that Sasquatch does exist. At least in the female variety. You never believed in such things. But there it is right before your eyes! Your just about ready to run screaming for your life! But as she steps forward you realize that it isn't Ms Sasquatch at all, its only one of Harlan's mysterious "Holler" dwellers. You've heard of them and caught a few fleeting glimpses of them, especially around the first of the month but you've never actually been this close to one. And now here it is in the flesh. Standing there with three teeth (two on top, one on the bottom) and six kids. And outlining each tooth is the remainder of her last three meals. And judging by the different colors it must have consisted of, eggs for breakfast (over easy of course), tuna salad for lunch and more than likely "Tater salad" was the main course for supper. She and sticks one crusty toe in the water to test the temperature and gives a shrill little excited laugh. And it amazes you to hear such a petite laugh expelled from something so huge!

NOT DONE YET HANG ON!
rawtruth

Harlan, KY

#2 Jan 21, 2010
as she slowly starts down the steps with her tribe of "Young'uns" with each one displaying little trickles of green snot oozing from each nostril. You feel your self slowly rise, due to all the water she displaces. And as she gets closer the sun reveals a host of little red bumps on her chest, and a head of hair that has been dyed so many times it now has taken on the color of gutter rust. Here she comes giggling like a school girl! With skin so white and a bikini so small she looks like a big ole busted can of biscuits! As she wades out past you, you notice that she has more Hair under her arms than most men have on their heads. And down below, separated by G string she so proudly struts by in, It looks like she has George Jefferson in a scissor hold. And ever once in a while due to the bikini being about two sizes too big.(And you never dreamed that they ever even made 'em so big) You get the full view. And it sorta resembles a big black cat with a cherry in its mouth! And even more disgusting as she passes headed out for deeper waters you notice that she also has a ample supply of hair on her back! And in amongst all the hair is a variety of different sized pimples. They sorta look like a bunch little bald headed men hiding in some bushes! Finally her and her screaming snot dripping "Young'uns" head on to the opposite side of the pool! Ah safe you think! The you notice that things are washing off of them and slowly floating in your direction. Things like green snot, dirt, cheap hairspray, and some stuff that can even swim. And of course one of the "Youg'uns" takes in a little too much water and vomits in the pool. And your swimming in it!!

STILL WANT A WATER PARK???

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#3 Jan 21, 2010
Rawtruth, you crack me up!!! This was a good one.
really

Macon, GA

#4 Jan 21, 2010
Although your story is quite funny, we still need something in our town. If you have ever been to a water park any where, there is always a few that make you not want to go into the water, but that is every where. They put enough chlorine in a pool to just about kill anything. And although it isn't always a pretty site, less fortunate people should get to enjoy as much as well groomed people. Why not bring something here that will be a small bit of fun for our kids. We have nothing. The kids would have something to do besides drugs, at least through the summer. Oh but than again we could give the money to the police or the magistrates. Then the police would have more money to arrest people, and keep bad guys in court or jail. The magistrates could get it and build more car washes, or pay for their kids attorney fees. That will really benefit our town. Not knocking all the magistrates.
knn

Somerset, KY

#5 Jan 21, 2010
good idea for a waterpark like so many people in harlan sounds like rawtruth wants nothing for the kids
sweet memories

Winchester, KY

#6 Jan 21, 2010
you forgot the Baby Ruth bars that used to float by at the old pool.
rawtruth

Harlan, KY

#7 Jan 21, 2010
knn wrote:
good idea for a waterpark like so many people in harlan sounds like rawtruth wants nothing for the kids
You folks are just way too serious! Its called humor people, you know a Joke? However I wouldn't want to swim in some of he stuff you can find in a public pool!

“Truth be known...”

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#8 Jan 21, 2010
I have to agree with you Raw. I have a pool at home with diving board, slide, the works, but my kids kept bugging to go to one of the many water parks in the area back in the summer. I finally gave in. We went at opening time (10:00 a.m.) and stayed until about 3:00 p.m. When the park first opened the water was nice and clear and you could smell the chlorine, but by time we left the water was dingy and you could not smell the chlorine. We don't have "Holler Dwellers" here, but we do have some ghetto people with poor grooming standards. Needless to say, the kids will not be returning to the water park next year.

“Truth be known...”

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#9 Jan 21, 2010
Don’t get me wrong. I think it would be a great thing for Harlan. I’m sure it would be a thriving business the first couple years, but I don’t think it would last very long because of the maintenance required and the pure fact that many people (those with acceptable hygiene/grooming habits) will only visit one time. It will end up just like the bowling alley or the skating rink. Kind of like a kid with a new toy. It will be played with for a while, but then it gets old and kind of set aside and forgot about until it is gone.
doctor

Harlan, KY

#10 Jan 21, 2010
how about another pharmacy
loved it

Frankfort, KY

#11 Jan 21, 2010
Rawtruth, I absolutely cracked up reading your story! That was great. I was at work in my office and was laughing so hard I had several coworkers come in and read it to them. We see people like that every day and that's why it was so funny!!! That was a very good read, and you could probably write a book about the people of harlan county.... And people, don't be so serious, it was a joke and I tell you what, it sure brought a smile to my face today!
rawtruth

Harlan, KY

#12 Jan 21, 2010
doctor wrote:
how about another pharmacy
Ha thats a good one! All jokes aside we might need a pharmacy to get rid of some of the stuff a person may catch swimming in a public pool around here!
lapdog

Harlan, KY

#13 Jan 21, 2010
A water park? Come on. Look at the road up toward Closesplint. The cliffs hang over the roads and are about to fall, the ditches are never cleaned out which leads to water on the road, and remember that big snow, the fallen trees lay in the road for a week. We need to focus on the more important things rather than a water park. I can't believe that Alred would even consider such a thing.
big jon

Anderson, SC

#14 Jan 21, 2010
I think the way they should decide what we get is by letting the ones getting it decide the should let every kid in harlan write what they want then take the five best answers and let the kids choose from them i mean if it's for the kids shouldn't they have a say so what they want no let the politcians have a say so
Hmm

Harlan, KY

#15 Jan 21, 2010
Raw, you never fail to crack me up.

And honestly, you're right. As is Infidel.
We need something that would actually be able to stay around for quite a while and keep revenue coming in. Besides, a water park would only bring in money for one season for maybe a year or two here.
Honestly, I LOVE the idea of having an arcade here. there's not much maintenance, it would bring in LOADS of revenue, and it's a great place for kids and young adults to hang out.
Have you ever gone to Middlesboro Mall on a Saturday night? That arcade is PACKED.

“Truth be known...”

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#16 Jan 21, 2010
Say, what ever happened to that big theme park that Loretta Lynn was always going to build up around the Cumberland area??? I remember those rumors floating around when I was a youngster. Guess she changed her mind huh… I think a theme park would be ideal. It would at least give folks within a few hours of Harlan a reason to go there. Not too many people living a few hours away would drive that just to hit up a water park, but you could have “wet” rides in a theme park that would surely be a splash!

If you think about it, people travel from all over the world to visit the Disney theme parks. If Harlan had something similar, and it wouldn’t have to be nearly to scale as a Disney or Six Flags park, it would definitely bring in the tourists or at least folks who live within a few hours of Harlan in either direction.
why Not

Macon, GA

#17 Jan 21, 2010
A skating Rink or a bowling alley, yes a water park would be nice. But most of our teeny boppers go all the way to harrogate just to bowl, or tazewell tn. to skate. Why not bring that money to harlan their spending. Why not all three, would be a variety of activities for our kids. How many parents out there would love to have their children close to home. I know i would feel a lot safer for them. Look around in our lil town, we've got so many teeny boppers with nothin to do but go to the movies. A water park would only be good for the summer. I'm not disagreeing with the park, i'm just voicing my opinion. I would be happy with anything for the kids to do. With all three, that would bring more jobs and in turn help out our economy. In turn harlan would be a better place for our kids...
an idea

Macon, GA

#18 Jan 21, 2010
An idea is only good when it becomes reality. The kids deciding would be a good idea, but the kids are not the ones paying for it when it is built. We had an arcade in the mall, not there anymore. We had a bowling alley, now its a furniture store. We had a skating rink, now its a thrift shop and building materials store. It doesn't matter what we bring, it has to be run correctly. Cheap enough for everyone to enjoy. Although we do have working people in Harlan, we still have fixed income households. After paying bills for anyone, there is not a whole lot left to spend on recreations. And if you think about a water park, we have visitors all summer that come for the four wheeling park, who also would be spending their money at the water park. And who says all the money has to be spent on one project. If it is being matched by the state, then you could get two things up and going.
seriously

Bolivar, TN

#19 Jan 21, 2010
How about something like the "Y", that offers a variety of things for all ages, and is not just seasonal. Cause after that descripition I don't think I'll ever go to a water park.
luv

Middlesboro, KY

#20 Jan 21, 2010
to all of u ppl saying it could go to other things sure it could..but were u a kid that grew up here? A kid that had anything to do on a Saturday? Most of u were around back when they had the skating rink and the bowling alley and have no idea wat its like.. Did u ever stop to think that maybe if we give our youth something else to do besides hanging out at Walmart or cruising the movies it may help the drug problem? Older kids will go there too.. I'm an adult and I would like to go.. u ppl need to thing of our youth their our future! And if we give them something to do besides partying on the weekends and drugs we just might help them :)

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