Program Helps Unemployed Dads Pay Child Support

Full story: Fox 8 WGHP

A group in Alamance County is helping unemployed fathers make child support payments through a program called the Responsible Fatherhood Program.
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Mom of 2

Burlington, NC

#1 Oct 5, 2010
This is a great thing! Not all dads are deadbeats and I'm happy to see someone realized that and started this. I wish there were more resources and rights for dads that "do the right thing".
janine

Sunnyvale, CA

#2 Oct 5, 2010
Then you have the dads that are deadbeats. My ex husband is close to $20,000 behind in court ordered child support. Yet he makes over 120k a year. He knows just how to work the system and waits until he is just about to go to court/jail and gets caught up just enough to prevent that from happening, then is right back at it the next month. He is only hurting his four children and he doesnt care.
Sad situation, sad for my kids and for all the other children of deadbeat parents.
Deadbeat Daddy

High Point, NC

#3 Oct 5, 2010
janine wrote:
Then you have the dads that are deadbeats. My ex husband is close to $20,000 behind in court ordered child support. Yet he makes over 120k a year. He knows just how to work the system and waits until he is just about to go to court/jail and gets caught up just enough to prevent that from happening, then is right back at it the next month. He is only hurting his four children and he doesnt care.
Sad situation, sad for my kids and for all the other children of deadbeat parents.
So you mean to tell me that when your X pays the 20,000 in arrears then that will total 40,000 spent on the childrens behalf after we add the 20,000 you spent? I am sick of these women who always claim equality, but hides behind feminism to try and keep a competitive edge over men. I say joint custody for all children whose parents can't stay together. Then the world would see how much men can be real men and cover that 6 months of custody with their children better than most women. But oh noooo!!!! Can't do that because he might just show that woman out. Now go out and speak the truth.
sick of the system

Wallburg, NC

#4 Oct 5, 2010
go fig the system helps out those who play the system dead beat dads r getting off once again the gov and systems stink they just don't want to put them in jail to up keep them it will never work and my ex owes 10,000 back child support so give my child the back money any donations please just aksing lololol
George1McCasland

Kansas City, MO

#5 Oct 5, 2010
Notice they don't tell them that they get free legal representation to get their child support modified, through the office of child support enforcement? Also, they don't give them the Federal Child Support Enforcement Handbook for Non-Custodial Parents, which explains their rights, which include free help to enforce access rights.
http://www.pueblo.gsa.gov/cic_text/family/chi...
http://Child_Support_Quiz.dads -house.org
George1McCasland

Kansas City, MO

#6 Oct 5, 2010
Mom of 2 wrote:
This is a great thing! Not all dads are deadbeats and I'm happy to see someone realized that and started this. I wish there were more resources and rights for dads that "do the right thing".
Notice they don't tell them that they get free legal representation to get their child support modified, through the office of child support enforcement? Also, they don't give them the Federal Child Support Enforcement Handbook for Non-Custodial Parents, which explains their rights, which include free help to enforce access rights.
http://www.pueblo.gsa.gov/cic_text/family/chi...
http://Child_Support_Quiz.dads -house.org
Wills

Kernersville, NC

#7 Oct 5, 2010
janine wrote:
Then you have the dads that are deadbeats. My ex husband is close to $20,000 behind in court ordered child support. Yet he makes over 120k a year. He knows just how to work the system and waits until he is just about to go to court/jail and gets caught up just enough to prevent that from happening, then is right back at it the next month. He is only hurting his four children and he doesnt care.
Sad situation, sad for my kids and for all the other children of deadbeat parents.
You're posting in the wrong forum.

My first wife owes me 60k in child support. I'd suggest you go back to California and find someone who cares. Over here on the right coast, we're doing our best to live our lives and not whine.

“Dads House Educational Center ”

Since: Apr 10

Overland Park, KS

#8 Oct 5, 2010
sick of the system wrote:
go fig the system helps out those who play the system dead beat dads r getting off once again the gov and systems stink they just don't want to put them in jail to up keep them it will never work and my ex owes 10,000 back child support so give my child the back money any donations please just aksing lololol
Play the system? Have you been watching the news? Over 80% of layoffs have been men. Over 40% of careers men worked in are GONE, forever. And, the system turns their back on them, not telling them that legal representation is free to get a modification. But, if they do file a modification, it takes a year to get a hearing, by which time they get arrested for being in arrears.
http://ch11-child_support-layo ffs_put_some_dads_in_jail.dads -house.org

Spend 12 hours a day, 7 days a week on this like I do and you have something to talk about.
Jules

High Point, NC

#9 Oct 5, 2010
Hey, where is the program to help me get my deadbeat ex busted for working under the table and claiming to be unemployed?
Anonymous

Montgomery, AL

#10 Oct 6, 2010
Jules wrote:
Hey, where is the program to help me get my deadbeat ex busted for working under the table and claiming to be unemployed?
Go earn your own money you dolt.
Marty

Thomasville, NC

#11 Oct 6, 2010
How's this. We pay the support. We should get receipts for what our support money was spent on. We should have the right to know exactly what our money was spent on. It's only FAIR! Am I wrong?

Since: Jan 10

Lincolnshire, IL

#12 Oct 6, 2010
Wow - there are a lot of angry women out there. This is a program that will help both the men and the children of divorce. Except for anger, bitterness, and vindictiveness - why wouldn't women support such a program?

Deadbeat Daddy makes an excellent point. Except where the child is at risk of physical danger, the courts should grant equal 50/50 custody to both parents. A week with each parent or a month - it doesn't matter. This way there's no child support, so money is taken out of the scheming of both so-called adults. It also provides the child(ren) with two parents. I'll bet that divorce rates would drop if no one could make money off of using their kids that way.

Marty,
Good point. A responsible person should be willing to provide receipts for support given.

I really like this program. Fathers always seem to get the short end of the stick on this sort of thing. There are dozens of agencies and programs for single moms. Why in the world wouldn't we want to support single dads that want to do the right thing?
Deadbeat Daddy

High Point, NC

#13 Oct 6, 2010
Marty wrote:
How's this. We pay the support. We should get receipts for what our support money was spent on. We should have the right to know exactly what our money was spent on. It's only FAIR! Am I wrong?
No Marty that's really not your business what the custodial parent spends the support money on. Things like beer, cigarettes, weed if they smoke it, the latest fashion adult clothing, the latest air jordans, car payments, car insurance, mortgage, rent, tithes, hair weave, manicures, pedicures, cover charge at bars, hotel rooms, adult plane tickets, cell phone, internet, cable or satellite tv, gambling, and jewelry are examples of what ADULTS should be able to provide for their own grown butts first, before any child is involved. So I believe that if any money from child support payments is spent on things like these then it's total bull manure, and your grown butt is stealing from your children. So maybe that's why you don't get that type of transparency as to what the money is being used for.

Since: Jan 10

Lincolnshire, IL

#14 Oct 6, 2010
Deadbeat Daddy,
I'm guessing your post is using sarcasm to make your point. Evidently there are bitter divorced men here as well.

...and the children are the only ones that really get hurt by all this squabbling.
man2man

Burlington, NC

#15 Oct 6, 2010
George,

Specifically, how do you know what's been told to these men? Do you have any idea of what the 13 week program entails? I'm not sure if you recognized this or not but what you saw was about a 2 minute overview/clip. I'm not sure what your issue is but I believe the program will EDUCATE the men about the child support system. You come off as an angry man. Anger won't help these men meet their obligations, only caring, dedicated people who sacrifice themselves to see something positive happen in the lives of the CHILDREN involved in these issues. If you have something that you think will benefit the org., how about sending it to them?

Since: Jan 10

Lincolnshire, IL

#16 Oct 6, 2010
janine wrote:
Then you have the dads that are deadbeats. My ex husband is close to $20,000 behind in court ordered child support. Yet he makes over 120k a year. He knows just how to work the system and waits until he is just about to go to court/jail and gets caught up just enough to prevent that from happening, then is right back at it the next month. He is only hurting his four children and he doesnt care.
Sad situation, sad for my kids and for all the other children of deadbeat parents.
Let's do the math, shall we?$120M per year is gross pay. Minus 35% for taxes leaves $78 take home. Let's assume that he's got a really good benefits package at work that takes care of insurance for the 4 kids for 5%. That leaves him with $74M take home assuming no 401k, savings, or life insurance (which would be stupid). Now if you're getting $20M a year (I'll bet it's a lot more) then you're getting almost 30% of his livable income before he gets to rent an apartment, eat, drive a car, or any other necessities. And you say "HE" is only hurting his children. Really??? Got a mirror?

....and the children are the ones that suffer through the squabbling.
Ashleigh

High Point, NC

#17 Oct 6, 2010
I think this is a good idea. They're not just getting the money from donations, they are having to prove they're willing to work by going through that program. My father never paid child support, so I know how tough things can get sometimes for single parents.
Now on the other side of that, some of these women receive way too much money and hardly any of it go towards the children.
speakup2

Dobson, NC

#18 Oct 6, 2010
BUCK JOHNSTON wrote:
<quoted text>
Go earn your own money you dolt.
Don't be a dolt..The money is for HIS children as well as HERS...
speakup2

Dobson, NC

#19 Oct 6, 2010
Blue Dog Dem wrote:
Deadbeat Daddy,
I'm guessing your post is using sarcasm to make your point. Evidently there are bitter divorced men here as well.
...and the children are the only ones that really get hurt by all this squabbling.
Ditto...and I agree with Most of your post on this subject. Except for the one that says that woman most likely gets More than 20K per year...I need to check it again but I thought that she said that he was 20K behind, NOT that he paid 20K per year.

Anyhow as far as the women and men being equal, this may start happening since most of the predominantly men jobs are disappearing. ALL of us are about to see what living in poverty really is. Most people nowadays have no clue what really being poor is. Personally I think that it will be Good for Them.

Since: Jan 10

Lincolnshire, IL

#20 Oct 6, 2010
speakup2 wrote:
<quoted text>Ditto...and I agree with Most of your post on this subject. Except for the one that says that woman most likely gets More than 20K per year...I need to check it again but I thought that she said that he was 20K behind, NOT that he paid 20K per year.
Anyhow as far as the women and men being equal, this may start happening since most of the predominantly men jobs are disappearing. ALL of us are about to see what living in poverty really is. Most people nowadays have no clue what really being poor is. Personally I think that it will be Good for Them.
I agree. The 20K was an assumption, but with 4 kids it's a pretty good guess, I think.
You're right - people in America don't even begin to understand what poverty is. I've been to Honduras, Costa Rica, and the Darrien Jungles of Panama on missionary trips. What we call poverty in America are riches there. Child support? Alimony? Not there. It's every man, woman, and child for themselves over there. Although, there's a lot less divorce and unwed mothers as well. The at least understand the long-term responsibilities associated with bringing a child into this world. I wish everyone had the opportunity to live that way for a time. They'd appreciate what they have then.

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