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help

United States

#1 Dec 19, 2012
how does one make the first move to contact your family for the first time in three years?
Advisor

Greeneville, TN

#2 Dec 19, 2012
Make a call. Leave a message. Send an e-mail. Send a note by snail-mail. Ring the doorbell. Any of these seem feasible to you?
Depends

United States

#3 Dec 19, 2012
It depends on why there was a 3 yr gap. I would try a phone call to start with and see where it goes.
mending

Gallatin, TN

#4 Dec 19, 2012
Man there ain't nothing better than mending them fences. I mended fences just months before my Dad died. I believe it would have eat me alive if I hadn't cause it is still eaten me alive cause it took so long. Goddness all the times missed.
your future x wife

United States

#5 Dec 19, 2012
Open your Bible and read the story of the Prodigal Son. Then, go! Run along now.
well

United States

#6 Dec 20, 2012
Depends wrote:
It depends on why there was a 3 yr gap. I would try a phone call to start with and see where it goes.
my mother in law & husband(his mom) got into a stupid arguement over a trivial topic.now so much time has went by that when i ran into a family friend,they said his mom said things would never be the same!it kills me to see my hubby suffer during every xmas holiday
dies alone

Bristol, TN

#7 Dec 20, 2012
I work in a hospital and I have seen so much. People who have been mean in their life time and I would say especially to their families, usually die alone or with very few people around. You can always tell what kind of life they have led. You have the person with their family grieving for their loss. You have the person with their family around looking like they can't wait for their family member to pass. You have the person with no one except maybe a lone preacher to say a word or two. Bottom line the mean pretty much die alone with no one really grieving over them. When you do what I do for a leaving the dying can be pretty sad. I have seen parents dying and their children will talk about what they are going to get right in the room. Even laughing. It's a sad sad job I have at times.
help

Greeneville, TN

#8 Dec 20, 2012
i been in prison for some bad stuff but i changed and found jesus. my family cut me off but i'd like to get back in good with them so they can help me out.
Seriously

Gallatin, TN

#9 Dec 20, 2012
help wrote:
i been in prison for some bad stuff but i changed and found jesus. my family cut me off but i'd like to get back in good with them so they can help me out.
Help you out emotionally? Have you been out long enough to prove you have changed? To start building trust? Are your actions speaking louder than your words? Hope it works out for ya if you are really serious about changing.
I have to ask, is the only reason you want back in with your family is to help you out?
help

Greeneville, TN

#10 Dec 20, 2012
they turned me in so I want to forgive them. i found jesus and i'm no danger to them anymore. i could use their help and they owe me for turning me in. like i say, i found jesus.
Seriously

Gallatin, TN

#11 Dec 20, 2012
help wrote:
they turned me in so I want to forgive them. i found jesus and i'm no danger to them anymore. i could use their help and they owe me for turning me in. like i say, i found jesus.
help wrote:
i been in prison for some bad stuff but i changed and found jesus. my family cut me off but i'd like to get back in good with them so they can help me out.
I believe you admitted to doing bad stuff. I don't think that your family owes you. By your own admission, you put yourself in prison.
It appears that you are playing this site or your family. Both?
so sad

Elizabethton, TN

#12 Dec 20, 2012
dies alone wrote:
I work in a hospital and I have seen so much. People who have been mean in their life time and I would say especially to their families, usually die alone or with very few people around. You can always tell what kind of life they have led. You have the person with their family grieving for their loss. You have the person with their family around looking like they can't wait for their family member to pass. You have the person with no one except maybe a lone preacher to say a word or two. Bottom line the mean pretty much die alone with no one really grieving over them. When you do what I do for a leaving the dying can be pretty sad. I have seen parents dying and their children will talk about what they are going to get right in the room. Even laughing. It's a sad sad job I have at times.
Greed does terrible things to people. To think a child would throw away a mama or a daddy (if they've been good parents) for what they can get when they're gone. You can't get those times you could have spent together back EVER....Wonder how many children have broken their parents heart this way? It would probably shock us. I've never understood that kids would think their parents owed them anything anyway. Parents ought to spend every penney and sell everything they have so they can have a easier life themselves while they're here and so their children can't abuse them trying to get it. This goes on in this country all the time. No respect for our elders. I've also seen people who are greedy this way go crazy because they've lied so much they start to beleive their own lies and become a totally different person. I guess that's God's way of judging them for that.
So my advice to the person starting this thread is try to start the healing in your family. You can't make someone forgive you but you can at least make the effort. Especially if it's your mama or daddy. They won't always be around. When they're gone it will be too late. Then you will have to live with that guilt the rest of your life. I can't imagine not talking to my mama and daddy or any of my family members for any length of time. Nothing is worth that! The legacy we leave behind will be what we've invested in people, not things. I think the Bible says something like that. So good luck. It's a start you're wanting to find a way to fix it.
so sad

Elizabethton, TN

#13 Dec 20, 2012
help wrote:
they turned me in so I want to forgive them. i found jesus and i'm no danger to them anymore. i could use their help and they owe me for turning me in. like i say, i found jesus.
It sounds like they did you a favor. They don't owe you, sounds like you owe them since you found Jesus. That's the most important decision you will ever make. If prison made you seek your salvation while you are in there, Praise the Lord! Sounds like you're saying you were a danger to them before prison. It will take time for them to trust you again and see if you've really changed. Be patient and show them you've changed. No one owes us anything in this world. We have to stand on our own two feet. We can hope that people would help us if we are truly in need. But, thinking people "owe us" is a big part of the problem in this country. I rejoice with you in your salvation.
help

Greeneville, TN

#14 Dec 20, 2012
Seriously wrote:
<quoted text>
<quoted text>
I believe you admitted to doing bad stuff. I don't think that your family owes you. By your own admission, you put yourself in prison.
It appears that you are playing this site or your family. Both?
i was asking for help and you judge me. see what i have to put up with. my family does the same thing.
Seriously

Gallatin, TN

#15 Dec 20, 2012
help wrote:
<quoted text>
i was asking for help and you judge me. see what i have to put up with. my family does the same thing.
I did not judge you. I asked questions. I didn't read any answers. Those were your own words. I hope it works out for you and your family.
period

Gallatin, TN

#16 Dec 21, 2012
so sad wrote:
<quoted text>Greed does terrible things to people. To think a child would throw away a mama or a daddy (if they've been good parents) for what they can get when they're gone. You can't get those times you could have spent together back EVER....Wonder how many children have broken their parents heart this way? It would probably shock us. I've never understood that kids would think their parents owed them anything anyway. Parents ought to spend every penney and sell everything they have so they can have a easier life themselves while they're here and so their children can't abuse them trying to get it. This goes on in this country all the time. No respect for our elders. I've also seen people who are greedy this way go crazy because they've lied so much they start to beleive their own lies and become a totally different person. I guess that's God's way of judging them for that.
So my advice to the person starting this thread is try to start the healing in your family. You can't make someone forgive you but you can at least make the effort. Especially if it's your mama or daddy. They won't always be around. When they're gone it will be too late. Then you will have to live with that guilt the rest of your life. I can't imagine not talking to my mama and daddy or any of my family members for any length of time. Nothing is worth that! The legacy we leave behind will be what we've invested in people, not things. I think the Bible says something like that. So good luck. It's a start you're wanting to find a way to fix it.
I agree with what you say but the Good Book doesn't say honor thy Father and Mother (if they are good to you). The Good Book just says to Honor your Father and Mother - period!
Scorned daughter

Shelby, NC

#18 Dec 21, 2012
help wrote:
they turned me in so I want to forgive them. i found jesus and i'm no danger to them anymore. i could use their help and they owe me for turning me in. like i say, i found jesus.
Your family don't owe you shit! You owe them. I hate how the ones who always do wrong scream that they're the victim and their families are the aholes. If you hadn't have been a POS then you wouldn't have gotten turned in. I will NEVER give my father the time of day because he will never admit his wrong doings and believes the world owes him something.
sad

Elizabethton, TN

#19 Dec 21, 2012
period wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree with what you say but the Good Book doesn't say honor thy Father and Mother (if they are good to you). The Good Book just says to Honor your Father and Mother - period!
You are right. Honor thy father and mother is the only commandment that has a promise with it....Exodus 20:12, "Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord they God giveth thee." I was trying to say especially if you have a good mom and dad, so there couldn't be an excuse if someone took advantage of them. A lot of people use the excuse of their parents being bad parents to take advantage of them. God doesn't say only if they are good parents, he just says to honor them.
help

Greeneville, TN

#20 Dec 21, 2012
I'm bored with your rambling posts to yourself dumbass. Y'all the morons and believe anything.
sad

Elizabethton, TN

#21 Dec 21, 2012
help wrote:
I'm bored with your rambling posts to yourself dumbass. Y'all the morons and believe anything.
So you didn't really want people to make suggetions to help? I was answering the other posters comment about honoring our parents. Doesn't sound like you've changed much then? I'll pray for you.

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