*the power of death*

Posted in the Greeneville Forum

heart broken

Indian Trail, NC

#1 Oct 17, 2013
How does someone learn to live & love again after losing their: lover,best friend, & soul mate to death?
Stuck

Colorado Springs, CO

#2 Oct 17, 2013
heart broken wrote:
How does someone learn to live & love again after losing their: lover,best friend, & soul mate to death?
I'm in the same place so I'd love for someone to give an answer or opinion that's different or unique from the usual advice about time, closure and moving on. It's not that simple...
heart broken

Charlotte, NC

#3 Oct 18, 2013
Stuck wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm in the same place so I'd love for someone to give an answer or opinion that's different or unique from the usual advice about time, closure and moving on. It's not that simple...
you got that right ! Just when i think. i can't cry anymore the tears keep coming! & I also feel so alone!

Since: Jan 11

Greeneville TN

#4 Oct 18, 2013
We can't change what happened. We can only survive....or not...
counter critter

Greeneville, TN

#5 Oct 18, 2013
heart broken wrote:
How does someone learn to live & love again after losing their: lover,best friend, & soul mate to death?
You can't loose someone! you never actually had them in the first place, all you ever had was a memory of them and that you still have no mater what. The happiness the love the joys and the pains are just memories even one second after they happen, just memories. You will always have them. Your lost love one will always have them . What they shared with you is different from what you shared with them, the sharing is what you miss and pine for. To move beyond this pain you must keep sharing your life with others and don't forget to share your life with your lost love one even if it only in your own mind . Sorry I could not be more precise, think on it for a while, PS: I talk to all my friends who have left the party, I imagine their at another party wondering where I am .

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#6 Oct 18, 2013
counter critter wrote:
<quoted text>You can't loose someone! you never actually had them in the first place, all you ever had was a memory of them and that you still have no mater what. The happiness the love the joys and the pains are just memories even one second after they happen, just memories. You will always have them. Your lost love one will always have them . What they shared with you is different from what you shared with them, the sharing is what you miss and pine for. To move beyond this pain you must keep sharing your life with others and don't forget to share your life with your lost love one even if it only in your own mind . Sorry I could not be more precise, think on it for a while, PS: I talk to all my friends who have left the party, I imagine their at another party wondering where I am .
I like that... and I find myself doing the same...
Stuck

Saint Louis, MO

#7 Oct 18, 2013
But you'll only have one TRUE soulmate in life, if you're lucky, so when something tragic happens to them it makes you question everything in your life. Everyone sees things differently and some people can move right along to the next person as easily as changing their shoes while others simply can't. And it's more than just a bunch of memories, I can still feel their vibes and 'presence' just as strong as in life. That's not a bad thing, I hope I always do...
Poison Ivy

Chicago, IL

#8 Oct 19, 2013
Stay single and you don't go through it.

“Read all about it!”

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#9 Oct 19, 2013
heart broken wrote:
How does someone learn to live & love again after losing their: lover,best friend, & soul mate to death?
I don't know. I think one probably just takes one day at a time and hopes, prays like heck that someday, somehow you will feel like you want to go on. I really wish I knew the answer to this question myself. I think if you have faith and believe in the afterlife, perhaps that can bring a small measure of comfort. And, maybe somehow, honoring their passing by trying to go on and do something for someone that needs it might bring some comfort too. And, you may not ever love again or even want to find someone else. I think that probably depends on your age. A younger widow or widower has a lot of life ahead of them- it makes sense to hopefully find love again some day. For the older person, I'm not sure.

“Read all about it!”

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#10 Oct 19, 2013
Poison Ivy wrote:
Stay single and you don't go through it.
That's sad and I hope you are just kidding around.

“light always defeats darkness”

Since: Jul 13

nowhere

#11 Oct 19, 2013
When you lose your wife, you lose your reason for living. Every day you get up and look for a reason to go on. You talk to her daily, and can almost hear her answer. You laugh and, when no one is around, cry. I do not know if it will ever get easier, but I do know she would kick my butt if I just gave up. That is just my case.
heart broken

Boiling Springs, SC

#12 Oct 19, 2013
FriendofDog wrote:
<quoted text>
I don't know. I think one probably just takes one day at a time and hopes, prays like heck that someday, somehow you will feel like you want to go on. I really wish I knew the answer to this question myself. I think if you have faith and believe in the afterlife, perhaps that can bring a small measure of comfort. And, maybe somehow, honoring their passing by trying to go on and do something for someone that needs it might bring some comfort too. And, you may not ever love again or even want to find someone else. I think that probably depends on your age. A younger widow or widower has a lot of life ahead of them- it makes sense to hopefully find love again some day. For the older person, I'm not sure.
we are both in our early 30' s so when i lost the love of my life this young it hurts even more knowing we were going to spend the rest of our lives together! Plus we shared a very young child which makes it all the more painful:(

“Read all about it!”

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#13 Oct 19, 2013
heart broken wrote:
<quoted text>we are both in our early 30' s so when i lost the love of my life this young it hurts even more knowing we were going to spend the rest of our lives together! Plus we shared a very young child which makes it all the more painful:(
You have my condolences. I can only imagine how tough that is and how much it must also hurt you for your child. You have to go on for your child as you know. You have to honor her/his Dad and let your child know about their Father through you. But, just don't shut the door on what might occur in the future. Maybe you'll never be able to love anyone else again, but sometimes, life has a wonderful surprise in store for you. I found the love of my life at 37. Wasn't looking for it, never expected it, but just got real lucky. I wish you the best of luck and hope that you are able to go on with your life and are able to find some peace for your soul.

“Read all about it!”

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#14 Oct 19, 2013
I Am The Magician wrote:
When you lose your wife, you lose your reason for living. Every day you get up and look for a reason to go on. You talk to her daily, and can almost hear her answer. You laugh and, when no one is around, cry. I do not know if it will ever get easier, but I do know she would kick my butt if I just gave up. That is just my case.
The instinct is to just sit in the corner and howl... I certainly understand that. The tricky part IS to make yourself get up and go on each day. I truly don't know how people do that except they just find inner strength one day at a time. I'm sorry for your loss to Magic. It must be awful.
Poison Ivy

United States

#15 Oct 19, 2013
Sorry. Ok some people say it's better to love and lose than to never love at all. I ( personally ) think never loving at all would be less painful.
little smoke

Murfreesboro, TN

#16 Oct 19, 2013
I think that Carlos Castenada's idea that Death is a Being that sits on your shoulder and whispers His presence to you with every action that you take in your life.

Death tells you, in a quiet whisper that He is coming for you. And that you better make every action Count. Because this may be your Last action.
Is this *Right Now* what you want to count in your life?
It must be. You're doing it!

“Read all about it!”

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#17 Oct 20, 2013
Poison Ivy wrote:
Sorry. Ok some people say it's better to love and lose than to never love at all. I ( personally ) think never loving at all would be less painful.
That's okay, you are right, it would be nice to just skip all of the pain, but you would miss so much in life. There really is no middle ground.. to love deeply you set yourself up for indescribable pain at some point, but to miss all of the love and living and happiness and life experiences... you just can't live in a vacuum and let all of those wonderful experiences pass you by..

“light always defeats darkness”

Since: Jul 13

nowhere

#18 Oct 20, 2013
Poison Ivy wrote:
Sorry. Ok some people say it's better to love and lose than to never love at all. I ( personally ) think never loving at all would be less painful.
I have to disagree. I will accept all the pain just to remember her smile and the sparkle in her eyes.
heart broken

Charlotte, NC

#19 Oct 20, 2013
FriendofDog wrote:
<quoted text>
You have my condolences. I can only imagine how tough that is and how much it must also hurt you for your child. You have to go on for your child as you know. You have to honor her/his Dad and let your child know about their Father through you. But, just don't shut the door on what might occur in the future. Maybe you'll never be able to love anyone else again, but sometimes, life has a wonderful surprise in store for you. I found the love of my life at 37. Wasn't looking for it, never expected it, but just got real lucky. I wish you the best of luck and hope that you are able to go on with your life and are able to find some peace for your soul.
thank u for your compassion & understanding ! I tell the lord each day not to take me from a broken heart so i can live on & raise our child :)

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