How do I deal with witnessing a suicide?

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Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#1 Oct 22, 2010
I saw a person very close to me shoot their self and they passed. It happed 5 years ago and im still having problems dealing with it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Since: Oct 10

Fort Campbell, TN

#2 Oct 22, 2010
I think that u should talk to a counsler or someone like that. I can't even imagine what u are going through, but I do know that it must be hard for u. U will be in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that u find some way to deal with this better and I'm sorry that u had to go through something like that.
greystone girl

Fort Campbell, TN

#3 Oct 22, 2010
Definitely seek out a counselor who can help you deal with this type of trauma. This is a horrible thing to witness and there is probably guilt and grief that can be processed. I know a good christian counselor in Morristown if that is they way you would want to go....wellspring on Main street. Peace
Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#4 Oct 22, 2010
Sarah Johnson 1 wrote:
I think that u should talk to a counsler or someone like that. I can't even imagine what u are going through, but I do know that it must be hard for u. U will be in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that u find some way to deal with this better and I'm sorry that u had to go through something like that.
thank you for caring. i honestly thought about a counsler but i just dont know if they would try to get me on all kinds of meds that would make it worse in the long run.
it will help

Gallatin, TN

#5 Oct 22, 2010
In my job I have delt with a lot of death some i knew some I did not. I have held there hand as they passed. I have pulled there mangled body from there cars. Yes it will efect you in ways you can never imagine. You need to talk to someone and it may take more then one time. It does help to talk to someone that u do not know or that knowes you. you will talk more openly. no you do not need drugs you need to talk.
fallsboy

Franklin, TN

#6 Oct 22, 2010
i worked for the sheriffs dept in orlando fl as a 911 operator and had a call where a man said to me phone rings i answer he says right this down and i proceed to write down a phone number, then he says call my wife and tell her i love her then i hear a shot in the background and all is quiet, i keep trying to get the man on the phone but when deputies arrive they find him on the livingroom floor with a gun shot to the head. i know with all the training i have i did my best and he didnt give me anytime to talk before shooting himself, what you need to know is IT ISNT YOUR FAULT, just try and think about what you could do to help someone if the same situation occurs again and your around, talk to people about your experience and you will find it gets easier to cope with what you saw
Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#7 Oct 22, 2010
fallsboy wrote:
i worked for the sheriffs dept in orlando fl as a 911 operator and had a call where a man said to me phone rings i answer he says right this down and i proceed to write down a phone number, then he says call my wife and tell her i love her then i hear a shot in the background and all is quiet, i keep trying to get the man on the phone but when deputies arrive they find him on the livingroom floor with a gun shot to the head. i know with all the training i have i did my best and he didnt give me anytime to talk before shooting himself, what you need to know is IT ISNT YOUR FAULT, just try and think about what you could do to help someone if the same situation occurs again and your around, talk to people about your experience and you will find it gets easier to cope with what you saw
Sometimes i have some crazy nightmares also. I have did research and 30% of people that see a suicide commit suicide their self. 70% think about it. Im one who has thought about it but has come to realize that i know what it feels like so why would i put my family through that. I have so much resentment towards him for doing that in front of me. I loved him so much and he did that in front of my face. It keeps replaying in my head every day of my life. I used to turn to drugs for the answer and figured out it just made it worse. I have been clean for 2 years now. I am so glad for people like y'all. thanks for giving me advice. I just feel like i'm going crazy.
Hang in there

Knoxville, TN

#8 Oct 22, 2010
Seriously wrote:
<quoted text> Sometimes i have some crazy nightmares also. I have did research and 30% of people that see a suicide commit suicide their self. 70% think about it. Im one who has thought about it but has come to realize that i know what it feels like so why would i put my family through that. I have so much resentment towards him for doing that in front of me. I loved him so much and he did that in front of my face. It keeps replaying in my head every day of my life. I used to turn to drugs for the answer and figured out it just made it worse. I have been clean for 2 years now. I am so glad for people like y'all. thanks for giving me advice. I just feel like i'm going crazy.
Suicide is the single most selfish act that a person can commit. That person is thinking of no other person but themself at that moment. They show utter disregard for the feelings or the effect on those left behind. I can understand their feelings of despair, loneliness or sadness but I can't for a minute condone it because of what it does to loved ones. Resentment is a completely normal emotion to feel after this. With time, it will get somewhat better for you. Until then, go talk to a mental health professional or minister.
Help is out there

Smyrna, TN

#9 Oct 22, 2010
There are many churches out there, of all denominations and faiths, that can help you with counseling. Depending on your finances, Frontier Mental Health might be able to help you. If you have insurance definitely check with your insurance provider to see who their listed providers are that can help with mental health counseling.

Post again if you do not have insurance and cannot find someone to help you from the suggestions above. I will be glad to research contacts and get you the help you need and deserve! Keep your chin up and remember that this was not your fault. Your loved one needed help and you got caught up in their unfortunate choice of dealing with their problem. It will be ok. Hang in there and know there are people who want to help you!:)
Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#10 Oct 22, 2010
Hang in there wrote:
<quoted text>Suicide is the single most selfish act that a person can commit. That person is thinking of no other person but themself at that moment. They show utter disregard for the feelings or the effect on those left behind. I can understand their feelings of despair, loneliness or sadness but I can't for a minute condone it because of what it does to loved ones. Resentment is a completely normal emotion to feel after this. With time, it will get somewhat better for you. Until then, go talk to a mental health professional or minister.
You are exactly right about it being the most selfish thing to do, but it has been Five years and it still feels like it happened yesterday. I think im going to take the advice and seek medical help. I just am nervous about it. Thank you to everybody on this thread. y'all have made me feel a little better for the moment.
Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#11 Oct 22, 2010
Help is out there wrote:
There are many churches out there, of all denominations and faiths, that can help you with counseling. Depending on your finances, Frontier Mental Health might be able to help you. If you have insurance definitely check with your insurance provider to see who their listed providers are that can help with mental health counseling.
Post again if you do not have insurance and cannot find someone to help you from the suggestions above. I will be glad to research contacts and get you the help you need and deserve! Keep your chin up and remember that this was not your fault. Your loved one needed help and you got caught up in their unfortunate choice of dealing with their problem. It will be ok. Hang in there and know there are people who want to help you!:)
I do have tenncare but idk if it is covered by mental health. thank you very much for the advice and god bless. I used to help my father with ems and saw a lot of traumatic events, but none of it compares to seeing a loved one here one min. then gone the next.
melissa

United States

#12 Oct 22, 2010
A lot of jobs have counselors thru the company. Maybe it is thru their insurance, not exactly sure, but you could try that route too. Good luck with getting help, and I am glad you realized that drugs was not the answer.
Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#13 Oct 22, 2010
melissa wrote:
A lot of jobs have counselors thru the company. Maybe it is thru their insurance, not exactly sure, but you could try that route too. Good luck with getting help, and I am glad you realized that drugs was not the answer.
Thank you.
TheRealOne

Winnsboro, SC

#14 Oct 22, 2010
Don't let it get u down in the dumps cause I bet u had no idea it was going 2 happen. Do u have a close friend or boyfriend u can talk to about it ? A good support system or someone to help u get ur mind off things ? Have u moved on ?
Seriously wrote:
<quoted text> Sometimes i have some crazy nightmares also. I have did research and 30% of people that see a suicide commit suicide their self. 70% think about it. Im one who has thought about it but has come to realize that i know what it feels like so why would i put my family through that. I have so much resentment towards him for doing that in front of me. I loved him so much and he did that in front of my face. It keeps replaying in my head every day of my life. I used to turn to drugs for the answer and figured out it just made it worse. I have been clean for 2 years now. I am so glad for people like y'all. thanks for giving me advice. I just feel like i'm going crazy.
A cop with a caring heart

Knoxville, TN

#15 Oct 22, 2010
This is what I deal with on a regular basis. People wonder why Cops are such assholes. How many people have you watched flop around on the floor with a small bullet in the head. The body is trying to die and the heart won't stop beating. They look at you and realize who you are and that you might be able to help but there is nothing you can do. The face of near death never goes away. You have to learn where to store it. I understand the way you feel. I can help you. If you are serious about this i will talk to you. In advance I will tell you, it is not your fault and you can't stop others from doing what they do. You will never forget this but you can overcome the pain. I think I know who you are but not sure. Let me know if you want my help.
A cop with a caring heart

Knoxville, TN

#16 Oct 22, 2010
Hang in there wrote:
<quoted text>Suicide is the single most selfish act that a person can commit. That person is thinking of no other person but themself at that moment. They show utter disregard for the feelings or the effect on those left behind. I can understand their feelings of despair, loneliness or sadness but I can't for a minute condone it because of what it does to loved ones. Resentment is a completely normal emotion to feel after this. With time, it will get somewhat better for you. Until then, go talk to a mental health professional or minister.
It makes me mad when people say that suicide is selfish. You have never been there. You don't understand that a person in this state of mind has no realization of what matters. therefore, how can they be selfish? They are reacting to what is happening inside of the mind. In this state nothing is as it once was. Everything they once thought has went away and they are excaping the pain. It is a pain that you have never felt before. So please, don't call it selfish. It is a relief of pain just as you yourself have taken pain medication for the worst pain you have ever felt. In this case, the thought of medication is not something they consider because they are not comprehending life or death.
Hang in there

Knoxville, TN

#17 Oct 23, 2010
A cop with a caring heart wrote:
<quoted text>
It makes me mad when people say that suicide is selfish. You have never been there. You don't understand that a person in this state of mind has no realization of what matters. therefore, how can they be selfish? They are reacting to what is happening inside of the mind. In this state nothing is as it once was. Everything they once thought has went away and they are excaping the pain. It is a pain that you have never felt before. So please, don't call it selfish. It is a relief of pain just as you yourself have taken pain medication for the worst pain you have ever felt. In this case, the thought of medication is not something they consider because they are not comprehending life or death.
I have felt it. I've been to the brink. That's why I said what I said.
Hiding for no one

Smyrna, TN

#18 Oct 23, 2010
Seriously wrote:
<quoted text> I do have tenncare but idk if it is covered by mental health. thank you very much for the advice and god bless. I used to help my father with ems and saw a lot of traumatic events, but none of it compares to seeing a loved one here one min. then gone the next.
YESS, you can go to mental health and TennCare covers it, Ive been off an on for 4 yrs now,hope you get the help that you need,in my thoughts an prayers!
Seriously

Fort Campbell, TN

#19 Oct 23, 2010
TheRealOne wrote:
Don't let it get u down in the dumps cause I bet u had no idea it was going 2 happen. Do u have a close friend or boyfriend u can talk to about it ? A good support system or someone to help u get ur mind off things ? Have u moved on ?<quoted text>
Its kinda weird. Some days are fine and others are bad. I guess I'm not over it. It's just a messed up situation.
Butterflies

Macon, GA

#20 Oct 23, 2010
Just remember that ugly slimey caterpillars go into a cocoon for a long long time. It takes them forever to be who they are & then one day they hatch out very bright & beautiful . Do you see where I am going? You have been through this horrible life experience in order 2 make u the person that God planned before you were even born. He knew YOU before you were born. What an awesome God we have & if u put ur faith & love in him good things happen. you too will have HIM by ur side when you re having bad days. You can turn it over to him and will be blessed 10 fold. I hope you are right with Jesus because he is the only friend u will have in the end & he loves you no matter what you have done. Hoping u see a bright free loving butterfly today & think that you are here for a purpose. You have to get past this experience.
Seriously wrote:
<quoted text> Its kinda weird. Some days are fine and others are bad. I guess I'm not over it. It's just a messed up situation.

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