Anyone have any good jokes that won't get deleted?

[Canadagirl]

Let's not be to racist remember this is all in fun.

[Canadagirl]

Any takers?

[Heres one]

HINDU DOTS...
FINALLY, SOMEONE HAS CLEARED THIS UP FOR ME...
For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads. Most of us have naively thought this was connected with m arriage or religion, but the Indian Embassy in Washington , D .C. Has recently revealed the true story. When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop or a motel in the United States . If nothing is there, he must take a job in India answering telephones giving technical advice.

[Diggs]

Heres one wrote:

HINDU DOTS...
FINALLY, SOMEONE HAS CLEARED THIS UP FOR ME...
For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads. Most of us have naively thought this was connected with m arriage or religion, but the Indian Embassy in Washington , D .C. Has recently revealed the true story. When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop or a motel in the United States . If nothing is there, he must take a job in India answering telephones giving technical advice.

Oh, that's not at all racist!:) Twelve Hail Mary's and 200 hundred push-ups for you!!

[micky]

Canadagirl wrote:

Any takers?

Did you hear that Victoria Secret and Smith and Wesson merged today?? The name of the new company is " Titti Titti/Bang Bang

[Canadagirl]

What do you call a hooker with braces? A Black and Decker pecker wreaker.

[Canadagirl]

That should have a black hooker

[Hanging CHAD]

Canadagirl wrote:

What do you call a hooker with braces? A Black and Decker pecker wreaker.

I forgot all about that one! Classic!

[Union All The Way]

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, "What's on TV?"

I said, "Dust."

And then the fight started ...

[Union All The Way]

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive ...

So, I took her to a gas station ...

And then the fight started ...

[Union All The Way]

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security . The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said,'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said,'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said,'you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten Disability, too.'

And then the fight started ...

[mama knows]

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender scowls at him and says, "Is that a steering wheel in your pants?"
The pirate scowls back and says "Arrr, it drives me nuts!"

[tom]

Rosey Odonel's got more chins than
a chinese phonebook!

[mama knows]

A bear and a squirrel are taking a poo in the woods. The bear looks down at the squirrel and says"Hey, little guy, do you ever have trouble with @#$# sticking to your fur?"
"Why, no, " said the little squirrel, looking up at the bear.
"Good", said the bear, and picked up the squirrel and wiped his @SS with it.

[mama knows]

Seal walks into a club...
I know, I know, not funny.

[tom]

Canadagirl wrote:

What do you call a hooker with braces? A Black and Decker pecker wreaker.

dumb.

[mama knows]

Heres one wrote:

HINDU DOTS...
FINALLY, SOMEONE HAS CLEARED THIS UP FOR ME...
For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads. Most of us have naively thought this was connected with m arriage or religion, but the Indian Embassy in Washington , D .C. Has recently revealed the true story. When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop or a motel in the United States . If nothing is there, he must take a job in India answering telephones giving technical advice.

LMAO!! Good one!

[Bill Clinton]

2 lesbian nuns walk into a bar.........

[Seriously]

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, the trick is getting them in there. hardy hardy har.

[MIbowhunter]

Q-what's the difference between a pity and a shame?
A- A pity is when a busload of Muslim extremists falls over the edge of a cliff, a shame is that there were 3 empty seats.

Q- What do fat women and mopeds have in common?
A- They are both fun to ride, until a friend sees you on one.