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HELP

Milan, TN

#1 Jan 31, 2012
Im so tired of living. I wish I was dead. Would any one cry for me? Would any one miss me? Would any one care? I have done everything I know to do to change my life and nothing works. I am just a total loser, in everything I do.
HELP

Milan, TN

#2 Jan 31, 2012
and please dont say give it to the Lord, I did and he gave it back.
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#3 Jan 31, 2012
I too have felt like this for over 3 yrs now! I've worked my whole until 2008 when I had a work accident that left me with a plate and screws in my neck and bad back and alot of other things! The main thing that hurts ne the most is I can't play with my grandkids like I did before my accident! At least the 2 oldest one can remember some good times with me but my last grandson is only a few months old and he will never know the nana they did! And that's just almost unbearable! And my depression is so bad at times I want to just give up! But then I think how much it would hurt them! And I don't want that! I look at their pics and videos when I'm at my breaking point and their smiles and laughter brings me back! And yes I do pray to God alot too! He might not answer them when we want him to but he will if you just pray! I think that's y he puts family friends or even strangers to talk to in our lives! I see a phyciatrious and it doesn't near as much as seeing my beautiful grankids faces! Do you have family or friends you can talk to? I promise it does help! I know some of my family they don't understand my depression and it's pushing us apart! I hate that! It's tearing me apart! But if I didn't have God or my grandkids or my true friends to talk to I dont know! But even now it still gets so bad I think about crazy stuff but then I think what would God and my grandkids would think about me giving up? But the main one I got in my corner is me! You have to believe that you are worth something no matter what others may think! Stand and believe in yourself! Cause if u don't u can all kinds if people around you but when it comes down to it you have to be the one to pull yourself up! With all I've been through and still go through if I can do it you can! It's just a daily struggle but you have to say Thank God I'm alive thank you for giving me another everytime you wake up! I hope it gets better for you! No I'm not trying to preach to you! Just telling you there are others worse off than I am! God bless you! I don't know who you are but I'm here if you want to talk!
Help

Milan, TN

#4 Jan 31, 2012
thanks for all you said. but am not worth it. my family dont understand. and that sucks am always alone. i have no money or way to go anywhere but work and i dont get paid for that. My friends are always tooo busy to talk so i dont bother. I thanks you tho.
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#5 Jan 31, 2012
Well I'm here anytime u need to talk! I'm not a weirdo or anything I'm a grandmother! So I know how to listen! I know we don't know each other but it's good to know you can talk to someone!
i know

Jackson, TN

#6 Jan 31, 2012
It's not that you're not worth it. You just quit trying. You we're never alone. You had your family around you, they asked you if you were ok. You said yes. They saw the pain and hurt in your eyes but just didn't care enough to try to help you. I know they had to see the hurt. If a perfect stanger can look in your eyes and ask you why are so sad then don't tell me your family can't see it there.
i know

Jackson, TN

#7 Jan 31, 2012
You slide down further into the depression every day. Everyone you care about slips out of your life. You pray to God to help you. So many days and nights you pray to find your way back. Then so simply it dawns on you. There is no God. You were told about God when you were a child, just like Santa and The Easter Bunny. All lies, no real tangible proof.
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#8 Jan 31, 2012
I don't think it's that your family don't care I think if they are like my family they can't help you! They think just by telling you to snap out of it then it will be ok! But I think they are as frustrated as we are cause they don't know what else to do! So that's why I think it helps to talk to someone that can relate to what you are going through! I think we all have depression in us but it only comes out when we go through something traumatic! I'm almost 50 and mine came out when I had a work accident in 2008 and can't work anymore! Lost alot of weight before but after accident gained it all back and alot more! Can't walk on trails or hike or anything to long anymore! Sometimes I resent my husband and blame him for getting out doing things and having a life and if I do too much I hurt so bad I'm in bed for days! Alot of times I hate myself and have pity parties and ask why me? When all my life I gave to others and done without! But I do thank God every morning for letting me wake up! and on my many bad days I tell the devil to get out of my head with those crazy thoughts! And thank God he does! I don't have to know your situation or even have to know who you are to tell you I am here anytime! You don't have to be alone! Just write me on here anytime you feel like no one cares! Or just write anytime you want to! Please don't feel one! Like I said you are not! Hope you have a goodnight!
i know

Jackson, TN

#9 Jan 31, 2012
So you are left with an empty faithless shell of yourself. Time goes on, you get worse. You are now beyond help. It's to late for talk and the pills no longer work. Every thought is of death. I have my death planned. It's like a small movie clip running through my mind many times a day. I will drive to Paris Landing Bridge and park on top the bridge. I will stand on the railing. I want it to be the perfect day. Not to hot and not to cold and with a nice breeze blowing. I will close my eyes and feel the wind blow against me. Then i will just step off and fall. Such beauty, force, and freedom.
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#10 Jan 31, 2012
Hey I Know! Why would you tell help there is no God? Just cause you can't see something or someone doesn't mean they are not there! And when someone is crying out for Help you don't add to it! You try to help them! I think God put others in our lives cause our family and sometimes our friends are to close to us to really help us! They think we will just snap back like a rubber band! But sometimes we can't and there are people that can help us! You just have to be willing to let them help! To be honest I rather talk to someone other than family about how I'm feeling! That's y I see a shrink once a month or every 2 weeks! She will see me anytime I need to talk! And I write things down when I'm feeling bad like she told me to keep a journal and I do and it does help! So please don't listen to negativity cause that will just bring you down more! Try to keep away from negative people! If u have to put on ear phones and tune them out with music! That's what I do now! I'm not saying I think everything is rosy all the time Im just saying you are in control of how your life will turn out! So make the best of it and pray! And like I said don't let others bring you down!
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#11 Jan 31, 2012
Can I ask how old y'all are? It doesn't really matter! I was just wondering! I just want y'all to know you have to find the right people to talk to! That can be family or friends or someone else that can see outside the box! There's nothing wrong with Trying until you find someone that can help you! There are people that can! Please try to do that!
Help

Milan, TN

#12 Feb 1, 2012
I cant tell you how old I am cause then people would start pointing figures. I have fought with depression for 18 years now. Yes am on meds but it just keeps me from yelling and hurting someone. I have lots of hateded inside, but the one I hate most is me. I cant even attempt to die. I have been throught sooo much and now facing more, I cant go on like this. I dont want to get up in the morning or do anything I just want to hide in my house. WHY ME GOD. OH GOD PLEASE HELP ME.
1234abcd

Jackson, TN

#13 Feb 1, 2012
God said in his word that he would not put more on us than we could bear. Turn to him. Read the Bible and go and do one nice thing for someone today and just see what a difference it will make. God put you here for a reason. He has a purpose for you life. Sometime it is hard to find that purpose but you do have a purpose. Involve yourself in something to that will not allow yourself to have these negative thoughts. God doesn't make a mistake. He has you here in this world for a reason!
Help wrote:
I cant tell you how old I am cause then people would start pointing figures. I have fought with depression for 18 years now. Yes am on meds but it just keeps me from yelling and hurting someone. I have lots of hateded inside, but the one I hate most is me. I cant even attempt to die. I have been throught sooo much and now facing more, I cant go on like this. I dont want to get up in the morning or do anything I just want to hide in my house. WHY ME GOD. OH GOD PLEASE HELP ME.
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#14 Feb 1, 2012
Canute send a private message to just one person on here? Either way I will be glad to give you my email and we can talk privately! I would really like you to know you can talk to me anytime! And yes I too think you are here for a reason! Please hang in there!
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#15 Feb 1, 2012
This is for help and I know! I'm here if you want to talk or just vent to!
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#16 Feb 1, 2012
Also I'm from Nashville I don't live here! I'm visiting family here in Gleason that's y I put Gleason for the location! I never heard of this site until a couple it so months ago when my ster told me about it! But like I said we can talk by email if u want to!
Help

Milan, TN

#17 Feb 1, 2012
1234abcd wrote:
God said in his word that he would not put more on us than we could bear. Turn to him. Read the Bible and go and do one nice thing for someone today and just see what a difference it will make. God put you here for a reason. He has a purpose for you life. Sometime it is hard to find that purpose but you do have a purpose. Involve yourself in something to that will not allow yourself to have these negative thoughts. God doesn't make a mistake. He has you here in this world for a reason!
<quoted text>
Now I believe in God. but that of more than we can bear is bull cause of the sudiced rate. so lets leave that alone.
new poster

Martin, TN

#18 Feb 1, 2012
http://suicidehotlines.com/tennessee.html

To anyone on this thread that needs help.......get in touch with some professionals by checking out the above link

GET HELP!!!!
Mojo

Philadelphia, PA

#19 Feb 1, 2012
New poster! I think that's a great ideal you posting that help hotline! I hope they do get help! It is there if they will just take it! I know it can get better if they take the help that is offered to them! I swore I would never go to a shrink but I'm glad I did! I still have some bad days with pain and in bed for days the depression really gets to me but I have my shrinks number and she will talk to me anytime I need her! She's great! I'm so thankful I found her! And I just hope these people on here will reach out and take that help! My heart is heavy with worry for them that's y I said I will talk to them anytime they want and they are worth something! Again so glad u posted the help link!
Help

Milan, TN

#20 Feb 11, 2012
You try and try to make things right. To help with your kids, and parents only to be slapped in the face with words. Why have i even tried.... The world is getting colder and colder. am so ready to leave it. and not have thesse worries anymore.

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