Deadbeat owners abandon pets as well ...

Deadbeat owners abandon pets as well as their homes

There are 73 comments on the Chicago Tribune story from Aug 9, 2008, titled Deadbeat owners abandon pets as well as their homes. In it, Chicago Tribune reports that:

DEAR ABBY: I work for a major lending company and have cleaned out foreclosed homes.

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LAS

Arlington Heights, IL

#1 Aug 9, 2008
Didn't Ask Amy recently have a letter about placing money in someone's hand vs. on the counter, and the LW suspected that it was a regional thing; like she had recently moved to a new area and had a couple of cashiers give her money in a way she didn't like or vice versa...was it ever determined whether or not this is a geographical thing?
EMV

Palatine, IL

#2 Aug 9, 2008
I think it is rude when a cashier extends their hand for payment and instead of handing the moeies to the cashier the customer places the payment on the counter. The customer may have felt that the cashier was beneath her and did not want to make physical contact with a strangers hand, albeit she would eat dinner prepared by a stranger. On the other spectrum, the cashier could have felt that the customer believed she was above her which is why she didn't make contact.
moosh

United States

#3 Aug 10, 2008
Dumb cashier. This person was doing herself and her a favor. She had exact change. Sometimes coming to the correct amount of exact change requires counting it. The easiest way to do that is to count it out onto the counter, and then the cashier picks it up from there. It also makes it easier for the cashier to see the exact change is correct. I would say report this incident to the manager, or just don't go back there again.
TTFN

Lombard, IL

#4 Aug 10, 2008
moosh wrote:
Dumb cashier. This person was doing herself and her a favor. She had exact change. Sometimes coming to the correct amount of exact change requires counting it. The easiest way to do that is to count it out onto the counter, and then the cashier picks it up from there. It also makes it easier for the cashier to see the exact change is correct. I would say report this incident to the manager, or just don't go back there again.
I had the same thought. I've done this myself for the reason you specify. However, usually once I'm done counting it, unless my hands are full, I try to pick up the money to hand it to the person.

When receiving change back, I prefer that the cashier place the coin in my hand and then the bills, which is the opposite of what usually happens. When the coin is placed on top of the bills, I've had the coins slide off and out of my hand too many times.(Ok, perhaps I'm not the most graceful person.) However, I've never made a rude comment to a cashier about it.

Angelique--orange pekoe this morning with fresh squeezed lime. You?
Mia

Chicago, IL

#5 Aug 10, 2008
LW3, that sounds like a Southern thing. My in-laws are from Mississippi and they can invent an impropriety and the ad hoc rule of ettiquette to fix it at the drop of a hat. My favorite cashier at my local market is also from Mississippi and she has chastized me for my rudeness in buying to much alcohol at one time, not switching one item for another on her say so, counting my change (which was automatically dispensed) in front of her, and paying more attention to the bag boy than to her.
KIZ

Naperville, IL

#6 Aug 10, 2008
Mia wrote:
LW3, that sounds like a Southern thing. My in-laws are from Mississippi and they can invent an impropriety and the ad hoc rule of ettiquette to fix it at the drop of a hat. My favorite cashier at my local market is also from Mississippi and she has chastized me for my rudeness in buying to much alcohol at one time, not switching one item for another on her say so, counting my change (which was automatically dispensed) in front of her, and paying more attention to the bag boy than to her.
You should tell the cashier that the reason you prefer the bag boy is because he doesn't comment on your purchases, he just keeps his mouth shut and bags it. She sounds like a nightmare.

I'd be curious to hear the opinions on this issue of people who work in retail. I used to work retail back in high school and college and never really cared if people handed me the money vs. putting it on the counter. However, since I've heard that some cashiers are offended by having to pick the money up off the counter, I always hand it to them.

I agree with the earlier poster, though, regarding the way change is returned. I also dislike having coins placed on top of bills, where they can easily slip off and bounce all over the floor. What is the rationale for putting coins on top? Is it so that you can see right away if your change is correct?
JJR60616

Chicago, IL

#7 Aug 10, 2008
I don't know about the vagaries of ordering fast food and putting money on the counter versus in their hands...

What I do know is I would have picked the money back up, said simply "I don't wish to offend you any further" and walked out and down the street to another fast food place.

And if I was the manager of that store, I'd give the cashier a small tutorial on customer service. And thereafter put her on the drive-in window where she won't be conflicted as she collects the money out of the tray.

I guess this could sound condescending...don't mean it to.

I've been a waiter, bartender, and have held many positions in the services industry while working my way through college.

But I have to say while I am a big proponent of treating servers (and other positions)as I would any other customer interaction at any level, the bottom line is some customers are not as you wish them to be.

And you need to provide service with a smile unless they're much further over the lane than just putting the money on the counter.
Daria

Dearborn, MI

#8 Aug 10, 2008
LW2--Give your early bird friend a job to do. She can finish the salad, vacuum the living room, sweep the walk. You might say, "Oh, you're so early, I haven't had time to -----, maybe you could give me a hand." Either that or hand her a magazine and go do your thing.

LW3--The worker was confrontational and rude. And her manager should have been informed. I do think it is much more polite to place the money in the cashier's hand, however.
Daria

Dearborn, MI

#9 Aug 10, 2008
KIZ wrote:
<quoted text>

I'd be curious to hear the opinions on this issue of people who work in retail. I used to work retail back in high school and college and never really cared if people handed me the money vs. putting it on the counter. However, since I've heard that some cashiers are offended by having to pick the money up off the counter, I always hand it to them.
I agree with the earlier poster, though, regarding the way change is returned. I also dislike having coins placed on top of bills, where they can easily slip off and bounce all over the floor. What is the rationale for putting coins on top? Is it so that you can see right away if your change is correct?
As a former cashier, I can tell you that I much preferred having the money handed directly to me. This saves me from scraping up coins from the slippery counter.

And I always handed them their change directly, coins first. You can bet that if I'd dumped it on the counter in front of them, THEY would have considered it rude.
Wyndie

Meadville, PA

#10 Aug 10, 2008
Giving money to the cashier: It's a cultural thing. At many Japanese supermarkets, there is a tray about four by six inches attached to the cash register. The customer places the money there. Either a bill or exact change is okay. The cashier then picks up the money from the tray and proceeds with the transaction. I presume that this is to make sure no actual hand-to-hand touching takes place. Most Japanese people don't like to be touched by strangers.

At McDonald's I sometimes put bills down on the tray before the food arrives, so the cashier knows there won't be any delay about the payment.
Mia

Chicago, IL

#12 Aug 10, 2008
KIZ wrote:
<quoted text>
You should tell the cashier that the reason you prefer the bag boy is because he doesn't comment on your purchases, he just keeps his mouth shut and bags it. She sounds like a nightmare.
I'd be curious to hear the opinions on this issue of people who work in retail. I used to work retail back in high school and college and never really cared if people handed me the money vs. putting it on the counter. However, since I've heard that some cashiers are offended by having to pick the money up off the counter, I always hand it to them.
I agree with the earlier poster, though, regarding the way change is returned. I also dislike having coins placed on top of bills, where they can easily slip off and bounce all over the floor. What is the rationale for putting coins on top? Is it so that you can see right away if your change is correct?
I like coins on top because sometimes my fingernails are too short to pick them up off a flat surface and they aren't always placed where they can be scooped into the hand. But if they're on top of the bills, I can just pick up the whole kaboodle by the edges.

I don't mind my cashier's comments and she doesn't seem to mind my smart-ass replies. People should be complex and they should be able to show their complexities. It makes for a more interesting dialogue than "How are you?" "I'm fine, thank you."

If I had been confronted the way the LW was, I would have held my hand out and said: "I'm so sorry. Give it back to me so I can do it the right way." and I would have pocketed the money and left.
iconoclast59

Batavia, IL

#13 Aug 10, 2008
Re: LW3, I wonder if the cashier was African-American. In the days of segregation, many white folks were horrified at the thought of touching a black person, and would thus place their money on the counter instead of in the black person's hand, and insist that their change be returned to them in the same manner. Since segregation was more prevalent in the American South, I can see why other posters mistakenly chalked up the practice as being some quaint regional etiquette.

Those memories still bubble under the surface for many blacks. The cashier may have felt she was being demeaned not only because of her status, but also because of her race.
debout

AOL

#14 Aug 10, 2008
Come on!! It's rude to ignore the outstretched hand of the cashier and toss the money on the counter. Or maybe you believe that, as the exalted McDonald's patron, you are equally justified in tossing your bills and change on the floor for the cashier to chase. After all, wherever you put the money, you are still paying. When you extend your hand to receive change, do you mind if the cashier tosses your money onto the counter and turns to the next customer?
LAS

Arlington Heights, IL

#15 Aug 10, 2008
Come to think of it, I have been to restaurants, ones where you pay at the front counter, that have a little mat on the counter, usually made out of an astroturf-esque material that people can set their change down and it's easier for the cashier to pick up the change. It's a good idea- more places should do it.
EEE

Hinsdale, IL

#16 Aug 10, 2008
I've been on both sides of monetary transactions - get your mind out of the gutter, Tex - and I'll say that while it is definitely easier when the money is placed in my HAND, I would not call it "rude" to place the money on the counter.

And when handing money to someone (on either side of the counter) I give coins first, directly into the hand and then bills.

But there are times - working the late shift at the Kum & Go (Yes, I really worked at a store called "Kum & Go" - they're HUGE in Iowa) when I just wanted to hurl the money straight at the customer's face.
EEE

Hinsdale, IL

#17 Aug 10, 2008
WERE

There WERE times.

I was about 16 at the time.
J-Kat

United States

#18 Aug 10, 2008
Who uses cash anymore, anyway? I use my check card for just about everything now. All that change is annoying to deal with.

The most important part of the column hasn't really been commented on--unfortunately, a letter to an on-line columnist won't stop the problem of irresponsible pet owners. It's hard to believe people would just abandon their pets in a vacant home, when there are animal shelters that will take them. But, <sigh> I know it happens all the time.
EEE

Hinsdale, IL

#19 Aug 10, 2008
J-Kat wrote:
...The most important part of the column hasn't really been commented on--...
Hi J-Kat.

My guess is that people haven't commented on it because there isn't much to say that LW1 and Abby didn't already say.

It's irresponsible and indescribably sad.
Hmm

Sparks, NV

#20 Aug 10, 2008
The transfer of money is culture specific. When I worked in retail for NIKE we had a lot of international customers. We were simply taught to handle money in the same manner that the customer did. For example, many Asian cultures do not pass cash hand-to-hand. Money is viewed as "dirty," and it really is full of pathogenic microorganisms.
I'm certain any company, big or small, would object to their employees scolding a customer for handing money over in any fashion.
marie s

Chicago, IL

#21 Aug 10, 2008
to force someone into tears, you are rude, disrespectful, and, i'd say, an a*** hole.
Joey wrote:
Re: LW#3
When I've had similar situations, I ask the clerk to invite the manager over and repeat the smartass remarks in front of him.
They either:
(1) Shut up and/or
(2) Walk away and/or
(3) Apologize and/or
(4) Break into tears (female only).
Any or all of these reactions are acceptable.

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