Whiney Crime Victums in Rullerferd Cownty
Posted in the Forest City Forum
#1 Oct 4, 2008
Over hyer in Rullerferd Cownty. We want yuns to know that as the high clerk ever knee shall bow to us and the many scowling wimmen whose sorryful drujery it is to hassle the public and pick yore pockits when ther not filin ther fangernails or making a pile of worthless photocopies to charge you for, or we'll sic Debbity Dufus Dee on you. So don't get uppity in our exclusive privity proppity, the Rullerferd Cownty corthouse.
Now heres yore repowart backed under force of arms and ammonishun by our high sherrif Jowls Conners. Whenever we have a crime victum hyer who proppity has been stole and the sheriff and the theeves and various fences and pone shops our friends and contribewters have collected ther share, then the judge Laura Snuffdipt Powell makes shore we git paid into our bags and purses first by the felluns. The victums don't count much. That's ther falt they had no bussines becoming victums or having proppity to be stole in the first place. They should shut ther mouths and not whine an be glad we dont take the rest of ther proppity or have our hafwit Debbidy Dee bust ther head. This hyer is our pollisy. So the first moneys go to the jail, then the prohibition oficers, then the sherrif, then the jail fees, then the fines and if theys anythang left over, then the whiny old victums can have them crums. If you don't like it go to Rolly and complane.
To the local meedia: Pleeze see Mizzres Hodge for the order of restatooshun and distribooshun in file number 07 CR 052260 state verses Robert Paul Waters and state verses Ricky Darryl Fisher for deetales. She gards it like a hen over her biddies. It will give you the formuler and explane the reason why out of about twinty thousan dollers damages done them newsance victums (some of which is outsiders at Lake Loor and the airport) we have collected thousans of dollers but have accounted to the whiny victums about 200 dollers sense goin on a year ago when our two homeboy crackheads Waters and Fisher loafered back to work. They oaut to thank us for even letting them have that much.
Any more whining and we'll have our judge Laura Snuffdipt Powell jaol you whiners for comtempt at Jack Conners cockroach hotel. And then Debbity Dufus Dee will zapp yer worthless azz with ol sparky his taser
/sined and selled/ His Honor High Clerk Jerry Brewer, ex off fishal judge of probait and Unamerced Grand Klutz of Party and Fackshun and Keeper of the Office Full of Countless Angry Indolent Wimmen
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