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1 - 14 of 14 Comments Last updated Feb 13, 2014
Front Desk Girl

Yukon, OK

#1 Jan 29, 2012
The other day a friend of mine was cashing his check at Wal-Mart in El Reno. The lady at the customer service desk was probably in her mid 60's and was complaining that she had to work customer service. She hated her job, they always moved her around, changed her schedule on her, made her work long hours...etc. Anyways so she counts the money back to my friend and tells them to enjoy his day. Instead of walking away he lays the money out on the counter and takes the counterfeit marker that was laying beside her register. He proceeds to draw a line of every bill, pausing between each one to give her a suspicious glare. This made the old woman's day and we all laughed hysterically about it.

If anything funny has happened to you recently post your stories here.
Front Desk Girl

Yukon, OK

#2 Jan 30, 2012
Guess no one else had any funny stories? Okay I will share another one of mine! My son (4) learned fire safety today at school. When he got home he told me all about how we had to run out of the house if it was on fire and we could not go back inside for any of our things. He then proceeded to gather all of his prized possessions and place them on the dining room table. This way he would be able to gather them in a hurry.
66six

Murrieta, CA

#3 Jan 30, 2012
Front Desk Girl wrote:
Guess no one else had any funny stories? Okay I will share another one of mine! My son (4) learned fire safety today at school. When he got home he told me all about how we had to run out of the house if it was on fire and we could not go back inside for any of our things. He then proceeded to gather all of his prized possessions and place them on the dining room table. This way he would be able to gather them in a hurry.
ROFL

Since: Nov 12

North Baltimore, OH

#5 Nov 26, 2012
I know the government is really out to protect us; whatever. Why else did we have drills in school where we curled up under our desks to protect us from a nuclear attack? I was the best tucker. If I had only known that it was just a way to get you into a nice little pile of ash so sweeping you up into a garbage bag was more cost effective, I would have lay spread-eagle on the floor and flipped a couple birds for the cleanup crew.
Standing in line for a lice check was the best. Laughing at the kids on public display as dirty scumbags, It wasn't so funny when I had to go through the line three times. Look nurse, you are a nurse right? I live on a ranch in the middle of nowhere. I've got a tick on my sac named Fred that's the size of a white grape. Wanna see it?
Robert, did you do your homework, No. Well, I'm sending home a note with you to show to your parents, have them sign it and return it tomorrow. My Dad writes back saying to paddle me whenever I didn't have my homework done. My teacher, Mrs.Gill would ask everyone to pass their homework up and after shuffling through the papers she would ask where mine was. Didn't get it done. She would open a side drawer and get a paddle out. More of a paint stirrer really. Into the hall and I grabbed my ankles. Three swats later and I was consoling her. Really, Mrs. Gill, please don't cry. You didn't even break the skin on the welts from where my Dad laid into me from your note.
Disheartened, she gave the privilege over to the Vice-Principal. Now she would call on the intercom for him every morning. Whooptie doo. That turned into a bit of a problem for yours truly when we saw the shop teacher from the High school walking past the Baseball fields swinging something. That something was a four foot paddle with rows of holes in it that turned seniors into sniveling 2 year olds.The Vice-Principal took a weekend aero-dynamics class to get that just right fit on my sweet spot. He also started his mornings with a cup of coffee and waited for me at the door to the classroom.

The Vice-Type Guy took a vacation for a week that year and for some reason we had a male substitute teacher as well. The first day he had me stand in front of the class by his desk and told the sheep, I mean students, to put their heads down on their desks. Anyone one caught looking would get paddled as well. He swung the paddle and smacked the side of the desk. The kids jerked at the sound in unison. He gave me a look that said, "Tell anyone and you get it for real". "Man", I thought, "How do you do that with your eyebrows"? Apparently he saw this as ridiculous as I did.
This turned into a D.Y.I project after a phone call to the old man. Now the plan was to send home a Photostat copy of a slip that read, "Was homework completed_______" then the teacher would put a checkmark on it to show that it was done. Come on people, I'm almost 10 years old. It was no time before I was putting a checkmark on it myself. This little glitch was soon discovered and solved by Pops. Now they had to write in the words, CHECK or NO CHECK. Man just choke my dumbass and get it over with.
This went on for the rest of the year until someone noticed I was squinting all the time. I wasn't able to see the chalkboard and was not taking full advantage of our Educational System. Hell, I thought I was seeing what everyone else was. I was a kid for crying out loud.
My 5th grade teacher Mr.. Riddle was an ex-marine and figured out my inability to adjust to the Status Quo. After a brilliant speech I had given on how our economy could be run without a monetary system, explaining in detail how we could all be given the things we need for free and all of mankind could live in peace and harmony, he reared back in his chair and shouted, "OH MY GOD, you're a commie". That's o.k. The next day he called me the next Ronald McDonald. That hurt.
a guy

Oklahoma City, OK

#6 Nov 26, 2012
I miss Front Desk Girl.:"(

Since: Jul 11

Oklahoma City, OK

#7 Nov 27, 2012
Forgewright wrote:
I know the government is really out to protect us; whatever. Why else did we have drills in school where we curled up under our desks to protect us from a nuclear attack? I was the best tucker. If I had only known that it was just a way to get you into a nice little pile of ash so sweeping you up into a garbage bag was more cost effective, I would have lay spread-eagle on the floor and flipped a couple birds for the cleanup crew.
Standing in line for a lice check was the best. Laughing at the kids on public display as dirty scumbags, It wasn't so funny when I had to go through the line three times. Look nurse, you are a nurse right? I live on a ranch in the middle of nowhere. I've got a tick on my sac named Fred that's the size of a white grape. Wanna see it?
Robert, did you do your homework, No. Well, I'm sending home a note with you to show to your parents, have them sign it and return it tomorrow. My Dad writes back saying to paddle me whenever I didn't have my homework done. My teacher, Mrs.Gill would ask everyone to pass their homework up and after shuffling through the papers she would ask where mine was. Didn't get it done. She would open a side drawer and get a paddle out. More of a paint stirrer really. Into the hall and I grabbed my ankles. Three swats later and I was consoling her. Really, Mrs. Gill, please don't cry. You didn't even break the skin on the welts from where my Dad laid into me from your note.
Disheartened, she gave the privilege over to the Vice-Principal. Now she would call on the intercom for him every morning. Whooptie doo. That turned into a bit of a problem for yours truly when we saw the shop teacher from the High school walking past the Baseball fields swinging something. That something was a four foot paddle with rows of holes in it that turned seniors into sniveling 2 year olds.The Vice-Principal took a weekend aero-dynamics class to get that just right fit on my sweet spot. He also started his mornings with a cup of coffee and waited for me at the door to the classroom.

The Vice-Type Guy took a vacation for a week that year and for some reason we had a male substitute teacher as well. The first day he had me stand in front of the class by his desk and told the sheep, I mean students, to put their heads down on their desks. Anyone one caught looking would get paddled as well. He swung the paddle and smacked the side of the desk. The kids jerked at the sound in unison. He gave me a look that said, "Tell anyone and you get it for real". "Man", I thought, "How do you do that with your eyebrows"? Apparently he saw this as ridiculous as I did.
This turned into a D.Y.I project after a phone call to the old man. Now the plan was to send home a Photostat copy of a slip that read, "Was homework completed_______" then the teacher would put a checkmark on it to show that it was done. Come on people, I'm almost 10 years old. It was no time before I was putting a checkmark on it myself. This little glitch was soon discovered and solved by Pops. Now they had to write in the words, CHECK or NO CHECK. Man just choke my dumbass and get it over with.
This went on for the rest of the year until someone noticed I was squinting all the time. I wasn't able to see the chalkboard and was not taking full advantage of our Educational System. Hell, I thought I was seeing what everyone else was. I was a kid for crying out loud.
My 5th grade teacher Mr.. Riddle was an ex-marine and figured out my inability to adjust to the Status Quo. After a brilliant speech I had given on how our economy could be run without a monetary system, explaining in detail how we could all be given the things we need for free and all of mankind could live in peace and harmony, he reared back in his chair and shouted, "OH MY GOD, you're a commie". That's o.k. The next day he called me the next Ronald McDonald. That hurt.
Geez!
DTM

Edmond, OK

#8 Nov 27, 2012
.

Holy shit!!!! You just explained my fourth grade year to a "T".... Also I think your dad and my dad are related.
DTM

Edmond, OK

#9 Nov 27, 2012
Ok here's one. I'm at Victoria Secrets with my wife cause she needed to do some shopping. Anyways I ended up wandering away from her and after a bit I walked up behind this woman that I thought was my wife, and lets keep in mind its Victoria Secrets here, so I wasn't thinking with the right head, not to mention I was still ogling over everything. So I said to her "hey, hurry up this place is making me horny and I'm wanting to lick you like a snow cone"Imagine my surprise when this lady turns around, smiles and says "yeah this place will do that to ya, but I don't really like snow cones that much.... A big loud holy shit ran across my lips and I ran out of the store. About 5 minutes later my wife came out and asked where I went and I proceeded to tell her the story. She laughed and said so your the one all the ladies were talking about at the register?? Man I wanted to crawl under a rock. Haven't been in that store since!!!
outspoken

Ballwin, MO

#10 Nov 27, 2012
DTM wrote:
Ok here's one. I'm at Victoria Secrets with my wife cause she needed to do some shopping. Anyways I ended up wandering away from her and after a bit I walked up behind this woman that I thought was my wife, and lets keep in mind its Victoria Secrets here, so I wasn't thinking with the right head, not to mention I was still ogling over everything. So I said to her "hey, hurry up this place is making me horny and I'm wanting to lick you like a snow cone"Imagine my surprise when this lady turns around, smiles and says "yeah this place will do that to ya, but I don't really like snow cones that much.... A big loud holy shit ran across my lips and I ran out of the store. About 5 minutes later my wife came out and asked where I went and I proceeded to tell her the story. She laughed and said so your the one all the ladies were talking about at the register?? Man I wanted to crawl under a rock. Haven't been in that store since!!!
Wow!!!! That is hilarious!!!

Since: Nov 12

North Baltimore, OH

#11 Dec 13, 2012
outspoken wrote:
<quoted text>
Wow!!!! That is hilarious!!!


This had me laughing outloud! I love the fact that the woman had a great sense of humor and responded the way she did. Life is great isn't it?
Anonymous

Elk City, OK

#12 Dec 21, 2012
During a luncheon at the police department last week, I ate 3 plates of beans (which I know I shouldn't). When I got home, my wife seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Sweetie, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." She then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as she was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. She made me promise not to touch the blindfold until she returned and went to answer the call. The beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming unbearable, so while my wife was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a garbage dump! It was AWFUL! I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other leg, I ripped off three more. I just about crapped my pants. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage and I'm pretty sure I singed a few nose hairs! Keeping my ears carefully tuned to my wife's telephone conversation in the other room, I went on releasing dirty bombs like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable! Eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, so I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with my "tactical release." My face must have been the picture of innocence, when my wife returned, apologizing for taking so long. She asked me if I had peaked through the blindfold, and I assured her I had not. At this point, she removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated standing around the table, with their hands to their noses, chorused: "Happy Birthday Robert!"..
Spanky

Oklahoma City, OK

#13 Dec 21, 2012
Sooo... Anonymous Robert... This sounds like the joke about the girl who farts while her boyfriend is walking around the car only to have him introduce her to the couple in the backseat...
lost

Fairview, OK

#14 Jan 12, 2013
Funny
Cathy98

Royal Oak, MI

#15 Feb 13, 2014
So today, my aunt came over and she was all like, "I can't wait for V-day tomorrow!" and my little brother, who's 8, said "Tomorrow's vagina day?" I never laughed so hard!

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