Should I tell my Husband about affair??

Should I tell my Husband about affair??

Posted in the Elizabethton Forum

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Stupid

Johnson City, TN

#1 Jul 3, 2012
About a year ago I cheated on my husband with his brother. A lot of what happened between us was emotional rather than physical, although we did sleep together on 2 occasions.

I think I did it because I wanted the excitement and as a reflex reaction to being married and suddenly feeling that my freedom had gone, although I still cannot be sure of the reasons myself. The whole thing seems totally crazy now, and I can't believe that I was so stupid.(Although I have to say that my relationship with my husband is now more amazing than ever.)

The problem really is whether or not to tell my husband. Whether I tell him or not, I am 95% sure he would stay with me although clearly if I did tell him he would be devastated and his relationship with his brother would be ruined, although they are not particularly close. Is it better to be honest in this situation, or is it better not to tell him and save his feelings and his relationship with his brother (although it may seem rather cowardly on my part)?
Amos Beemus

Frankfort, KY

#2 Jul 3, 2012
no,no,no....hell no. Tell him and ruin 3 lives and your marriage. Nothing positive will be accomplished. Forget it.
guest

Cleveland, TN

#3 Jul 3, 2012
He has the right to know! If he stays he stays if not then your marriage won't be a lie.
Nobody

Kaneohe, HI

#4 Jul 3, 2012
Ho
Stupid wrote:
About a year ago I cheated on my husband with his brother. A lot of what happened between us was emotional rather than physical, although we did sleep together on 2 occasions.
I think I did it because I wanted the excitement and as a reflex reaction to being married and suddenly feeling that my freedom had gone, although I still cannot be sure of the reasons myself. The whole thing seems totally crazy now, and I can't believe that I was so stupid.(Although I have to say that my relationship with my husband is now more amazing than ever.)
The problem really is whether or not to tell my husband. Whether I tell him or not, I am 95% sure he would stay with me although clearly if I did tell him he would be devastated and his relationship with his brother would be ruined, although they are not particularly close. Is it better to be honest in this situation, or is it better not to tell him and save his feelings and his relationship with his brother (although it may seem rather cowardly on my part)?
Sad

Johnson City, TN

#5 Jul 3, 2012
If the situation were reversed, would you want to know? You can be sure, at some point he will find out, better to come from you, even if he leaves you, than to find out some other way.
Unknown II

Linville, NC

#6 Jul 3, 2012
Live with the consequences of your actions. Tell him.
Don

Nashville, TN

#7 Jul 4, 2012
you are a ho. he should dump your ass.
done dirty

Kingsport, TN

#8 Jul 4, 2012
Stupid wrote:
About a year ago I cheated on my husband with his brother. A lot of what happened between us was emotional rather than physical, although we did sleep together on 2 occasions.
I think I did it because I wanted the excitement and as a reflex reaction to being married and suddenly feeling that my freedom had gone, although I still cannot be sure of the reasons myself. The whole thing seems totally crazy now, and I can't believe that I was so stupid.(Although I have to say that my relationship with my husband is now more amazing than ever.)
The problem really is whether or not to tell my husband. Whether I tell him or not, I am 95% sure he would stay with me although clearly if I did tell him he would be devastated and his relationship with his brother would be ruined, although they are not particularly close. Is it better to be honest in this situation, or is it better not to tell him and save his feelings and his relationship with his brother (although it may seem rather cowardly on my part)?
You didnt have a problem doing" the nasty" with his brother so why worry about your husband now ? you know what should be done .So do it.
ClueLessMuch

Blountville, TN

#10 Jul 4, 2012
Do not tell. The only reason you want to confess is to clear your conscious . Live with it. Don't hurt him...
hmmm

Murfreesboro, TN

#11 Jul 4, 2012
WWJD
been there done that

Johnson City, TN

#12 Jul 4, 2012
Do not tell him, it would ruin to many lives. Six years ago I had a brief affair with a husband of a family member and trust me, I know now it was a HUGE mistake. Just because you made one mistake doesn't mean you don't love him, it means you are human and we all get at a point and time that we think that the grass is greener on the other side. Spare him the hurt and yourself of the agony of doing it. Just learn from it and make sure it don't happen again. Let sleeping dogs lie.
Sad

Johnson City, TN

#13 Jul 5, 2012
been there done that wrote:
Do not tell him, it would ruin to many lives. Six years ago I had a brief affair with a husband of a family member and trust me, I know now it was a HUGE mistake. Just because you made one mistake doesn't mean you don't love him, it means you are human and we all get at a point and time that we think that the grass is greener on the other side. Spare him the hurt and yourself of the agony of doing it. Just learn from it and make sure it don't happen again. Let sleeping dogs lie.
"we all get at a point and time that we think that the grass is greener on the other side."
NO we all don't!
KKim

Los Angeles, CA

#14 Dec 16, 2012
I had a six year affair with a 13 year old younger guy than me and I must say it was the best thing that could of happened to me. I still question why I cheated on my husband because I thought I was happily married. I was 43 years old and he was 30. I'm known to be a B and stuck up because I do get tired of men hitting on me, but with this guy I put my guard down. I did so many wild sexual things with him that I never did with my husband. I reflect on it and believe that that may have been the reason why I had a long term affair with him. My husband would have never approved of the way I dressed when I went out with this youngster. I wore mini skirts with and without panties and I liked the attention I got. I liked banging in public and out in the open. I discovered all of these things with this youngster. I would and still get wet thinking of our sexual encounters. He convinced me to have a threesome with him and one of his friends and it was hot. I actually felt for him. Why? We don't see each other anymore and I went through a bad depression because I feel and felt guilty for cheating on my husband. This happened over seven years ago and I still think about those hot experiences.
OldTennGranny

Johnson City, TN

#15 Dec 16, 2012
Honesty is always the best policy!

U may as well tell him, sooner or later he will find out. Everything is revealed within time.

Youre still cheat him for as long as u dont tell him the truth! He has the right to know!

The point is do u respect him or not? TELL HIM!
Mr easy 2

Johnson City, TN

#16 Dec 16, 2012
KKim wrote:
I had a six year affair with a 13 year old younger guy than me and I must say it was the best thing that could of happened to me. I still question why I cheated on my husband because I thought I was happily married. I was 43 years old and he was 30. I'm known to be a B and stuck up because I do get tired of men hitting on me, but with this guy I put my guard down. I did so many wild sexual things with him that I never did with my husband. I reflect on it and believe that that may have been the reason why I had a long term affair with him. My husband would have never approved of the way I dressed when I went out with this youngster. I wore mini skirts with and without panties and I liked the attention I got. I liked banging in public and out in the open. I discovered all of these things with this youngster. I would and still get wet thinking of our sexual encounters. He convinced me to have a threesome with him and one of his friends and it was hot. I actually felt for him. Why? We don't see each other anymore and I went through a bad depression because I feel and felt guilty for cheating on my husband. This happened over seven years ago and I still think about those hot experiences.
if u ever want to hook up let me know I like older women I don't care for theses young girls
Mr easy 2

Johnson City, TN

#17 Dec 16, 2012
Stupid wrote:
About a year ago I cheated on my husband with his brother. A lot of what happened between us was emotional rather than physical, although we did sleep together on 2 occasions.
I think I did it because I wanted the excitement and as a reflex reaction to being married and suddenly feeling that my freedom had gone, although I still cannot be sure of the reasons myself. The whole thing seems totally crazy now, and I can't believe that I was so stupid.(Although I have to say that my relationship with my husband is now more amazing than ever.)
The problem really is whether or not to tell my husband. Whether I tell him or not, I am 95% sure he would stay with me although clearly if I did tell him he would be devastated and his relationship with his brother would be ruined, although they are not particularly close. Is it better to be honest in this situation, or is it better not to tell him and save his feelings and his relationship with his brother (although it may seem rather cowardly on my part)?
no don't tell him what he don't know want hurt him don't feel bad every body does it now days
cunune

Masontown, PA

#18 Dec 16, 2012
APG

Mount Juliet, TN

#19 Dec 16, 2012
Stupid wrote:
About a year ago I cheated on my husband with his brother. A lot of what happened between us was emotional rather than physical, although we did sleep together on 2 occasions.
I think I did it because I wanted the excitement and as a reflex reaction to being married and suddenly feeling that my freedom had gone, although I still cannot be sure of the reasons myself. The whole thing seems totally crazy now, and I can't believe that I was so stupid.(Although I have to say that my relationship with my husband is now more amazing than ever.)
The problem really is whether or not to tell my husband. Whether I tell him or not, I am 95% sure he would stay with me although clearly if I did tell him he would be devastated and his relationship with his brother would be ruined, although they are not particularly close. Is it better to be honest in this situation, or is it better not to tell him and save his feelings and his relationship with his brother (although it may seem rather cowardly on my part)?
You didnt care about his feelings when you were boinking his brother, why care about them now? Go ahead tell him, screw up his self esteem, his marriage, and his relationship with his brother all in one fell swoop. Poor man, married to a heartless tramp like you. Tell him, so he can move on and find himself a real woman, with a heart that's not black and cold like yours obviously is.
Hoss

Johnson City, TN

#20 Dec 16, 2012
Every body putting her down how about his brother sounds like he he's low life to he ain't much of a brother
not surprised

Harrisburg, NC

#21 Dec 16, 2012
I have no clue how your conscience has kept you from telling him if you love or ever loved him! How would you take the news of him and your sister? Sounds like you're awfully confident, WAY TO CONFIDENT, he won't leave you! Obviously your vows meant no more than a pile of shitty to you....since a. you cant forsake all others, b. truthful, c. Putting him before yourself! Why DONT you do this man a hide favor, tell him the truth, see where he stands, but maybe you CAN give him a chance at someone's truthful unwavering honest love.....yours sounds far from it!

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