We all need to laugh, post jokes here
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United States

#27 Apr 24, 2013
What's the difference between a rooster and a blonde? A rooster says "cock a doodle doo" and a blonde says "any cock will do."

Sioux City, IA

#28 Apr 25, 2013
I was out shopping the other day when I saw six women beating my MIL up. As I stood there and watched, her neighbor, who knew me, said, "Well, aren't you going to help?" I replied, "No. Six of them is enough".

Sioux City, IA

#29 Apr 25, 2013
A patient says, "Doctor, last night I made a Freudian slip. I was having dinner with my MIL, and I wanted to say, "Could you please pass the butter?" "But instead I said, "You silly cow, you have completely ruined my life."

Nashville, TN

#30 Apr 25, 2013
The Pope, a Catholic Priest, an Alter boy and Obama were on a boat fishing of the coast of Italy. Obama snags a huge swordfish and its fighting and fighting. Just as it gets to the boat, it punctures the bow and the boat starts to sink. The Pope begins to pray and the boy begins to cry screaming "I can't swim!" The Catholic priest looks at Obama and says he can't swim what should I do. Obama says save yourself and screw the boy! The priest goes "you think I have time?"
mystery guest

Little Rock, AR

#31 Apr 25, 2013
How do you tell a male chromosome from a female chromosome?

Pull down it's genes......
mystery guest

Little Rock, AR

#32 Apr 25, 2013
Why not, lol....

How can you tell boy pancake from a girl pancake?

By the way they're stacked.....
mystery guest

Little Rock, AR

#34 Apr 25, 2013
Sorry, LBF but I haven't seen where anyone on this thread made fun of God, or demonstrated any hate for God!

I also believe in a kindlier God with a sense of humor. I mean, really, look at all the "jokes" He has created right here on earth. I am SURE that He, in his infinite wisdom, approves of laughter.

Sioux City, IA

#36 Apr 25, 2013
I just ignore LBF. Quoting scripture out of context with a sanctimonious and smug and self riteous attitude are the kind of self proclaimed "Christians" that God doesn't want in the kingdom of heaven. God is not all hell and damnation. God is love and comfort and the promise of everlasting life. The devil must really have a tight hold on someone for that much anger and fear and doubt in God's love and mercy to be vented in such a hurtful way. Definitely not what God wants. I feel sorry for them that this is how they view their relationship with God.

And now for jokes...

A hunter is out hunting bear in the woods. He sees one, lines up his sights, takes a shot, and misses. The bear sees the hunter and charges towards him. The hunter tries to take another shot, but finds he's out of ammo. He throws down the gun and starts running away, but he realizes that the bear is going to catch up to him.
The hunter falls to his knees and starts praying. He says, "Dear Lord, I ask that you let this bear find some religion before he does me in."
He turns around, and the bear stops, falls to its knees, and starts praying. The bear says, "Dear Lord, for this food I am about to receive, I am truly gratefulů"
mystery guest

Little Rock, AR

#37 Apr 25, 2013
Wow Guest....someone will for sure have an appropriate scripture quote for you with that joke! However.....it was pretty cute :) Yep even God would appreciate the humor.

Sioux City, IA

#38 Apr 25, 2013
One day, a farmer was tending to his livestock when he noticed that one of his cows was completely cross-eyed. He called up a veterinarian friend of his who told him to bring in his cow. The vet took one look at the cow, stuck a tube up the cow's butt, and blew into the tube until the cow's eyes straightened out. The vet charged the farmer a hundred bucks, and the farmer went home happy. About a week later, the cow's eyes were cross-eyed again, but this time the farmer figured he could probably take care of it himself. So he called his hired hand over, and together they put a tube up the cow's butt. The farmer put his lips to the tube and started to blow. Strangely, nothing happened, so he asked his hired hand to give it a try. The hired hand removed the tube, turned it around, put it in the cow's butt and started to blow.
"What are you doing?" asked the farmer, horrified.
"Well, I wasn't gonna use the side that YOU had put your lips on."

Sioux City, IA

#39 Apr 25, 2013

Q: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a dog have in common?

A: Wet noses.

Henderson, TN

#40 Apr 26, 2013
laughter is good for the soul.

Tucker, GA

#41 Apr 26, 2013
What does a condom and a coffin have In common?

Tucker, GA

#42 Apr 26, 2013
They both carry stiffs! One coming and ones going!

United States

#45 Apr 28, 2013
Living by faith wrote:
Jude 17-18
(17)But, beloved, remenber ye the words which were spoken before of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ;
(18)How that they told you there should be MOCKERS in the last time, WHO SHOULD WALK AFTER THEIR OWN UNGODLY LUSTS.
The COMMODIANS all over America make fun of, laugh at and MOCK God, His Word, and His people!
Filth is not Funny!
Have you heard this one?
Repent or Perish!!!
There may be some later, I dont know, but would you please show us from this point back to the orginial post by that young man where anyone has made fun of God?
I say you can't. Because there aren't any. I think you're just trying to hijack this thread.
I got a suggestion. Start your own thread, then rant all you want.

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