Women paying child surport

[Good father]

Does anyone know why the child surport office will go after a man,but want go after a woman,since time has changed and there is alot of deadbeat women in dyersburg,more and more father are getting there children,but the child surport office will not try as hard to get a woman to pay,but they will put a man in jail,can someone tell me why it's like this

[jenn]

WE have custody of my husbands autistic 5 year old, we have had legal custody since feb 4th '08. The first 6 months we had him the child support office refused to stop taking $125 a week out of my husbands check so she basically got a free $500 bucks a month for 6 months from us, we finally had to get our lawyer to threaten the child support workers with throwing them in jail for contempt cause we had a judges order to stop payment. When they did stop it they said we would have to take her to small claims court if we wanted our money back, I think that is a crock!! We applied for child support from her in Oct '08 and they just now sent a garnishment order to her work because shes only been there 2 months, they have been telling us for 2 months that they are gonna send her a letter for contempt of court and for non payment and they will most likely remove her liscence, who cares, she doesnt have a liscence, she still drives. Shes a crackhead, she does not care about any of that! She is over $3,000 behind in child support and we cant get them to move their asses. We found out in May '09 that she had also been drawing a disability check on him of $600 a month the whole time he has lived here & her son & ourselves have never seen a dime from her. She has never bought him so much as a pack of diapers, so now they have her for fraud but the state is not even doing anything! All they did was send her a letter telling her she had to pay them back so they could give the money to the proper guardian. My ex husband called me 2 days ago freaking out because the child support place sent him a letter telling him he is $105 behind and has to catch it up immediatly! He draws unemployment right now but I still get my child support every week. I was so furious because they wont do anything to the deadbeat druggies in this state regardless of their gender but when someone who is trying as hard as they can gets 1 payment behind they wanna throw them in jail. Its ridiculous. I wish there was a higher authority to go through because I would much rather see my step sons mom sit in jail than have her run around the streets scoring drugs and not taking care of her responsibilities. She doesnt even have visitation rights as of right now. IF THERES ANY DEADBEAT PARENTS READING THIS, GET FIXED!! DONT HAVE KIDS THAT YOU DONT WANT TO TAKE CARE OF OR PROVIDE FOR!!

[GOOD MOTHER]

well let me tell you this they will go after a woman because i had to pay. if the mother has a job buddy they will make you pay. and i did'nt loose my child. my child wanted to go live with his father. and they will offset your taxes to.

[jenn]

This is the first job my step sons mom has ever had, She is 33 years old!! Her and her husband dont file taxes because he owes thousands in back child support for an older son he has that he NEVER sees. They also have a 3 year old that they dont take of, they put her off on grandma. Thats what i was implying, It doesnt matter what gender you are, its like the child support office can detect the ones that they know are good people and that cant afford to go to jail for missing one payment. They go after the good ones because they know they are just wasting their own time with the deadbeats who don't work. And just for the record, my husband and myself have custody of all our kids which is a total of 4 and they all live with us. I have 2 from my previous marriage and he has 1 from his previous relationship. We only get 92.00 a week on my 2 kids and so far nothing on his son so I have been there in every aspect of the child support system. Even before we got custody of my step son when my husband was paying it and not getting his visitation rights enforced. We ended up having to pay a lawyer $2,000 to represent us in everything. Custody, child support, visitation, ect. I know some people feel hopeless out there but I promise if you write everything down that they do wrong with dates, record voicemails they leave, get police reports and just save a little money every payday eventually you will come out on top. I had to tell my husband this for 3 years while we paid her $125 a week and didnt know where they were because she would move and run off for months at a time. In the end he thanked me for keeping him positive & sticking by him through it all. I swear if we can do it with 4 kids and 1 income then anyone can do it.

[Jen]

to the other jenn- kudos to you and your husband for being such supportive parents to all your children.

To the OP- I don't know why there seems to be a double standard. Any parent, regardless of gender, is just as accountable as another for the care of their child.

To the "GOOD MOTHER:" Your wording says it all. "I had to pay?" What is that? You're his mother. Of course you "had to" pay. Nobody should have to force anyone to help support their own kid. The fact that they had to withhold your taxes for it means you didn't keep up on your monthly payments. Sending them to the other parents house does not mean you're free of that obligation.

People really need to stop complaining about how they "have to" take care of their own kids. If you treat them like burdens, they'll feel like burdens and then you're in for a lot more hurt later on.

They're blessings. Be glad that you "get to" pay child support. That means they have needs, which means they're alive.

[Guest]

They do go after the women to

[tell me]

my mom went to JAIL did not pass go did not collect 200 lol she ran off and started a new family and forgot all about her other two kids serves her right too

[dad]

Good father wrote:

Does anyone know why the child surport office will go after a man,but want go after a woman,since time has changed and there is alot of deadbeat women in dyersburg,more and more father are getting there children,but the child surport office will not try as hard to get a woman to pay,but they will put a man in jail,can someone tell me why it's like this

hell yea thats the truth

[dad]

GOOD MOTHER wrote:

well let me tell you this they will go after a woman because i had to pay. if the mother has a job buddy they will make you pay. and i did'nt loose my child. my child wanted to go live with his father. and they will offset your taxes to.

i am in the same situation,the child support offices of dyer county suck they have some sorry , lazy bitches there.they all need to be fired!!!!! they need both male and female workers there.

[Dyersburg resident]

I have to agree with the double standard. My kids mother refuses to pay. Hell, it is a job just getting into court for CS when it is the mother who you are trying to make pay.

[Lizard]

I hear ya... You can't get past the people at the front desk to get anything done. She(the so called Mommie)probably owes us about 15,000. Never paid a penny. Has not even seen the kids since Jan. No phone call nothing.I believe that is called Abandonment. I do not care if she never sees them again but its the point. She must not care anything about them to go that long with no contact. How can a mother do that to her children... Oh Im sorry I forgot who I was talking about. Some MOMMIE!!?? Im the Momma! Would love to get her rights taken away. I think we may be able to. Sigh your rights away and keep the dang money. Know any good lawyers?

[How about this one]

My ex has 2 sons, the oldest with me and the younger with another girl. I am currently getting child support although he is not a father. He is working and child support office takes child support directly out of his paycheck or I wouldn't get one red cent. His younger son's mother just recently went to file for child support, hasn't even ask him for any money the whole time the child has been in the world and he is now 5. The child support office told her they couldn't locate him! How can they not locate him when they are taking money from his check every two weeks to send to me? A few weeks later, they sent me a copy of his wage assignment proving they know where he is and I went to the child support office with her and took the paper. Showed it to them and then told them to now say they can't locate him! He told her yesterday that he would move to Canada before he paid her any child support. Now that is a DEADBEAT! Child support office didn't do anything for me either though until I hired Vanedda Webb, she is great and knows the child support laws.

[i know]

i have not gotten a payment from my ex in 3 years and he aint seen her either and they cant find him to serve him papers its who u know in this town

[MOTHER]

Dyersburg resident wrote:

I have to agree with the double standard. My kids mother refuses to pay. Hell, it is a job just getting into court for CS when it is the mother who you are trying to make pay.

How come these men come in and take the kids and then they NEED cs to make it. If u man enough to take the kid thn man up and leave the mom alone!!! she is hurting enough, she failed as a mom, dont u think that is payment enough for them.....u think

[Dyersburg resident]

MOTHER wrote:

<quoted text>How come these men come in and take the kids and then they NEED cs to make it. If u man enough to take the kid thn man up and leave the mom alone!!! she is hurting enough, she failed as a mom, dont u think that is payment enough for them.....u think

I won't get upset at your response because I KNOW you have to be kidding, but I do have a question for you. Would you ever say what you said about a father having to pay child support?

[woman]

i have to pay child support!!! my son live's with his aunt temp. case of his daddy beat him when my son went to stay a few nights with his daddy... the child support office got me in court a few day's later and hit me up for child support but not the daddy and come to think about it the daddy has not spent 1 second in jail for what he did, and hasn't paid 1 red cent out of 6 years for child support... the child support office didn't tell him that he had to pay while my son was staying with his aunt for temp....

[MOTHER]

Dyersburg resident wrote:

<quoted text>
I won't get upset at your response because I KNOW you have to be kidding, but I do have a question for you. Would you ever say what you said about a father having to pay child support?

i have a 7 yr old girl and her dad doesnt pay support but its not my daughters fault so i dont keep her away, however i have a 15 yr old son that lives at his dads and they keep him from me b/c of money, soooo yes i would say that about a dad too...i now have 3 other kids tht me and my husband take care of. we dont worry bout the money all we worry bout is him being there when she needs him

[good father]

this is not about father's paying child support,this is about the women that are order to pay and don't,the chils support office in dyersburg will not go after them,i've been dealing with them for years and still to this day don't get anything,but i have one child i always pay on and if i miss a payment on her they are quick to get me,so we father need to band together and get a good laywer out of town to sue them down there and just maybe they will start doing there jobs

[stiles]

MOTHER wrote:

<quoted text>How come these men come in and take the kids and then they NEED cs to make it. If u man enough to take the kid thn man up and leave the mom alone!!! she is hurting enough, she failed as a mom, dont u think that is payment enough for them.....u think

You are exactly right. The courts usually do not enforce child support orders on women: only on men. Additionally, most men, if they're lucky enough to gain custody, will gladly relinquish child support from the mother. They do not mooch off of mothers to take care of their children. Why can't mothers do the same?

[tater]

Men see women looking at them for a meal ticket, a free ride (child support.) Stir up that baby fast, then tear him up. Watch out, men! Danger Ahead! Your life as you know it is about to be over! You will be a slave to her forever!

Court costs, attorney fees, child support payments approaching 100% of your net income, time off work for court appearances. Go to court, my friend, and observe "Daddy Day" in juvenile court or motion day in Chancery. It's brutal.

Don't go there!

This danger is very real. Mark my words.