Who is the guy in all black that walks the streets in crossville

[Gatekeeper]

Who is this guy, looks like an old heavy metal groupie went bad.. Always wears trench coat and black duds, whats his story

[Minus]

Gatekeeper wrote:

Who is this guy, looks like an old heavy metal groupie went bad.. Always wears trench coat and black duds, whats his story

He used to be a stunt double for Alice Cooper during the Welcome to my Nightmare tour. One night, while prepping for his big stunt in I Love The Dead, his codpiece came unglued and snapped up towards his eyes at lightning speed. Try as he might, he could not react in time and the leather cock protector punctured his right cornea.

This unfortunate incident severely inhibited his depth perception which cause him to accidentally lick Alice's dong one night during a prank in which he was only supposed to LOOK like he was licking Alice's dong.

The dong licking ostracized him from his fellow metal tourmates, eventually resulting in his dismissal from the entourage.

That night in 1975 he left the bus at approximately 3am and began a decade-long staggered walk towards Crossville, Tennessee. It has taken him years to get here but now he calls this place home. He has forgotten his past completely due to a self-imposed mental block but his story is tattooed in italics down the entire length of his spine.

I read it one night after I gave him a pack of cigarettes to strip for me.

Boy, was I surprised.

[Happy]

Johnny Cash? The man in black..HE'S ALIVE!!!

[Spurrier Suxs]

Minus wrote:

<quoted text>
He used to be a stunt double for Alice Cooper during the Welcome to my Nightmare tour. One night, while prepping for his big stunt in I Love The Dead, his codpiece came unglued and snapped up towards his eyes at lightning speed. Try as he might, he could not react in time and the leather cock protector punctured his right cornea.
This unfortunate incident severely inhibited his depth perception which cause him to accidentally lick Alice's dong one night during a prank in which he was only supposed to LOOK like he was licking Alice's dong.
The dong licking ostracized him from his fellow metal tourmates, eventually resulting in his dismissal from the entourage.
That night in 1975 he left the bus at approximately 3am and began a decade-long staggered walk towards Crossville, Tennessee. It has taken him years to get here but now he calls this place home. He has forgotten his past completely due to a self-imposed mental block but his story is tattooed in italics down the entire length of his spine.
I read it one night after I gave him a pack of cigarettes to strip for me.
Boy, was I surprised.

Seriously man; that is the funniest crap I have ever read on here! Kudos to Minus!!!

[Minus]

Spurrier Suxs wrote:

<quoted text>
Seriously man; that is the funniest crap I have ever read on here! Kudos to Minus!!!

Thank you.

But...

There are those on this website that will take me seriously and give me crap for this post. Trust me. It happens all the time.

Wait for it.

[sleepless at home]

most people call him Jeepers Creepers

[wondering]

Gatekeeper wrote:

Who is this guy, looks like an old heavy metal groupie went bad.. Always wears trench coat and black duds, whats his story

his name is charly hoover he spent 30 years in prison for killing 2 men back in the late 70s

[Sal]

Minus wrote:

<quoted text>
He used to be a stunt double for Alice Cooper during the Welcome to my Nightmare tour. One night, while prepping for his big stunt in I Love The Dead, his codpiece came unglued and snapped up towards his eyes at lightning speed. Try as he might, he could not react in time and the leather cock protector punctured his right cornea.
This unfortunate incident severely inhibited his depth perception which cause him to accidentally lick Alice's dong one night during a prank in which he was only supposed to LOOK like he was licking Alice's dong.
The dong licking ostracized him from his fellow metal tourmates, eventually resulting in his dismissal from the entourage.
That night in 1975 he left the bus at approximately 3am and began a decade-long staggered walk towards Crossville, Tennessee. It has taken him years to get here but now he calls this place home. He has forgotten his past completely due to a self-imposed mental block but his story is tattooed in italics down the entire length of his spine.
I read it one night after I gave him a pack of cigarettes to strip for me.
Boy, was I surprised.

that was very funny !

ive wondered who he is as well , i saw him when i was on my way home from work a few times sitting in downtown ...

[happo]

It is Bimbo from Monterey!

[mythreesons]

I call him Devil Man but some people call him Hamburglar, I also heard he was in prison for murder. He used to drive a all black SUV type truck and live at the Apts. on Stanley St. I think he is homeless now. I seen him around Ivy Ave and also on on Stanley Street past the high school. I wonder what he is carrying in that black backpack?

[wondering]

Bimbo from monterey wrote:

NO HE KILLED A MAN IN THE WALMART PARKIN LOT FOR SCREWING HIS WIFE he did his time now leave him ALONE

he didnt kill anyone at walmart.he is from midway he killed one at vandaver at the guys house.while he was out on bond waiting trial on his first killing he killed another one at the old rocky top in big lick.i know i know him and his brother which is doing time for murder.get your shit straight.

[Minus]

Bimbo from monterey wrote:

NO HE KILLED A MAN IN THE WALMART PARKIN LOT FOR SCREWING HIS WIFE he did his time now leave him ALONE

Leave him alone? If (and I stress the word "IF") he killed someone, the last thing people should do is leave him alone. He should be harrassed endlessly until he can no longer take it and he moves his worthless, homeless ass out of this town.

You are okay with a murderer walking these streets of your hometown? That is strange.

I have a feeling you would not be saying this is he was a convicted child molester. This town would be calling for his blood.

News flash: murderers are worse than child molesters.

[Kneel b4 Zod]

Minus wrote:

<quoted text>
News flash: murderers are worse than child molesters.

Actually, both should be executed.

Vlad the Impaler, boy do we need him not.

[Cheeba]

Minus wrote:

<quoted text>
He used to be a stunt double for Alice Cooper during the Welcome to my Nightmare tour. One night, while prepping for his big stunt in I Love The Dead, his codpiece came unglued and snapped up towards his eyes at lightning speed. Try as he might, he could not react in time and the leather cock protector punctured his right cornea.
This unfortunate incident severely inhibited his depth perception which cause him to accidentally lick Alice's dong one night during a prank in which he was only supposed to LOOK like he was licking Alice's dong.
The dong licking ostracized him from his fellow metal tourmates, eventually resulting in his dismissal from the entourage.
That night in 1975 he left the bus at approximately 3am and began a decade-long staggered walk towards Crossville, Tennessee. It has taken him years to get here but now he calls this place home. He has forgotten his past completely due to a self-imposed mental block but his story is tattooed in italics down the entire length of his spine.
I read it one night after I gave him a pack of cigarettes to strip for me.
Boy, was I surprised.

And all this time I was hoping you were the Jeepers Creepers dude!!! Can you at least hook me up???

[Kneel b4 Zod]

My other post should say "now"

[wellwell]

he is kind of a scary guy and would prefer to be left alone. OBVIOUSLY. He did spend time in prison for murdering tow men. IT WAS NOT IN WALMART parking lot. By the way, nothing is worse than a f*cking child molester dumb ass. But I don't feel either should be allowed to live

[wildfire]

wellwell wrote:

he is kind of a scary guy and would prefer to be left alone. OBVIOUSLY. He did spend time in prison for murdering tow men. IT WAS NOT IN WALMART parking lot. By the way, nothing is worse than a f*cking child molester dumb ass. But I don't feel either should be allowed to live

yes he did kill 2 men so did his brother ronnie hoover his name is charly.but he is no child molester he is just a mean sob dont mess with him or they will find you some where.

[wellwell]

don't misundertand, I know he is not a child molester just making comment to the dumbass that thinks murderes are worse.... so true they are meaner than a damn rattlesnake

wildfire wrote:

<quoted text>yes he did kill 2 men so did his brother ronnie hoover his name is charly.but he is no child molester he is just a mean sob dont mess with him or they will find you some where.

[Meldan]

Inside sources say....The murders are true, with him and his brother, he's also very controlling at home with his mother...(She has ended up in CMC a few times, if you get what I mean) And his father was "offed" because of the same crap.....

[Meldan]

Minus wrote:

<quoted text>
He used to be a stunt double for Alice Cooper during the Welcome to my Nightmare tour.....surprised.

Your funny.....where do you come up with this crap? You should be a writer, if not already one...lol