Karen

Ladys Island, SC

#512 May 2, 2012
I understand what both sides are saying. I am a single Mom with a fifteen year old son whose father waited until now to become a part of his life and he only pays $150.00 a week. My son plays football and basketball, I live on an island in South Carolina. My son takes the bus to school off of the island and I work off of the island some thirty two miles away. My son stays after school for practice and when it is spring practice I have to leave the island go and take him to practice and pick him up. When we were divorced the judge told him to keep health insurance on him and he does not do that. I had to apply for state health insurance for my son. My son is almost six feet tall I have to order his clothing, and shoes most of the time. There has not been any increase in child support since 2002, so I am going to ask all of you why should I not go back to court to increase child support and when I do go how much should I ask for? My rent just went up thirty dollars, gas as we all know is now high, and clothing is gone up. So now I am asking you all to give me the answer. His father makes three times the amount I make and just bought another home, he and his new wife both have new cars I am driving a 1997 van that I keep patching up because of the cost of new cars. So now you all tell me what am I to do?
DJW

Fort Benning, GA

#513 May 7, 2012
CAPTAIN_JACK SPARR0W wrote:
child support laws are ridiculous If your paying child support then chances are you know what I mean .
No one is saying don't be responsible for your child , It's about changing the outrageous amounts awarded in most cases for the non-custodial parent to pay .
you should be responsible for your children , but you shouldn't have to live below a normal standard of living to do it .
leaving your spouse is not a crime yet your treated like a common criminal if you do and they get the kids .
It's almost like being placed on probation for a crime your expected to pay a set fee for the next set amount of years until the child or children turn 18 sometimes even longer lose your job or get behind the court will either force you to come up with the money and tack on a penalty fee as well or jail you until you come up with the money or serve out your jail sentence for which you get no credit for or against your err ages .
anything else you go to jail for that time counts it's timed served !
the time you serve for child support counts as nothing !
The state of South Carolina violates it's own law by stating that no amount shall be ordered that causes a parent to live below an acceptable standard which creates a hardship on the paying parent.
This is a lie!
A judge will tell you he does not care about your rent or problems,and will throw you in jail .
Yet you don't see them going to jail or being charged for breaking this law .
Child support is a scam used by the courts and the state and federal government to make money under the guise of another law the courts make money off the handling fees and court cost , the states makes money in the way of funds to house, cloth and feed the inmates .
It's a viscous circle !
So, why in the hell does SC charge 5% court costs which adds up to quite a bit of money. Where does our SC Taxes go?? Im Military so I'm just gonna change my state of residence!! Dumbasses. I like GA better anyway. Less taxes to support the courts that take my money anyway!!! Finally get some justice!
depressed father

United States

#515 May 27, 2012
DJW wrote:
<quoted text>
So, why in the hell does SC charge 5% court costs which adds up to quite a bit of money. Where does our SC Taxes go?? Im Military so I'm just gonna change my state of residence!! Dumbasses. I like GA better anyway. Less taxes to support the courts that take my money anyway!!! Finally get some justice!
I have been reading these posts and all of you should really just forget how good you got it. Here let me explain why. I was unemployed when sc ordered me to pay 250 a month. The mother was loving with her boyfriend and they had two new cars, her childsupport goes to her mothers house along woth her foodstamp card and every other state funded help she can swindle. Her boyfreind makes alot of money. Is this my issue, no it isnt. In fact i am happy for her. My issue is that she wont even let me speak to my kids, not even via phone. I would give up my paycheck every week to get what some of you ungrateful people have on both sides. It makes me sick that the main argument here is the money. My girls are priceless to me. Their mother sees them as a paycheck. But unless i have hard evidence that she is a bad mother there is mothing i can do. Like i said i cant even call my girls, and i dont even have a criminal record, i just live out of state.
IMO

Charlotte, NC

#517 Jun 26, 2012
I'm a woman and it's the truth...SC is hard on some fathers. But,if you're a black woman and your kid's father does not work, they order them to pay pennies every month, while a white man may be told to get a job. Our kids or forced to continue to live in poverty. Also, they do get a fee, whether it's $1 or .50 it adds up when you consider all the payments they receive every month from paying non-custodial parents.
Kelly wrote:
I believe some tall tales are being told here but anyway I do have some advice. If you can't afford an attorney, find one that will work for you pro bono, or represent yourself. You don't have to be an attorney to approach the courts, you can act pro se. All you need to do is study up on what is court protocol. It is not HARD, Trust me, been there, and done that, successfully. All it cost me was the filing fee with the court and the expenses I incurred mailing the copies to my spouse. I faced the judge and things were worked out.
Also, SC does NOT make money off of child support payments. They charge a small fee for their administration costs to disburse the money and that is hardly income for them. If anything, it is a loss to the state. If you paid directly on time, there would be no need to go through the courts, now, would there? Maybe some of you see yourself in this post.
Truth hurts sometime.
MBN

North, SC

#518 Jun 29, 2012
Just aggrivated wrote:
The problem comes in when people have kids and one parent pushes everything off on the other one.. yes people pay child support. big waah. The custodial parent is putting a roof over their head, driving them around, missing work bc they r sick or have an appt. Its so easy to make a baby but so completely different to raise one. Saying your the parent means nothing if u are writing a check just to complain about it. Money doesnt do whatcha think. If you lived with the child you would pay it all! The thing people forget about is they use water, electricity, gas, the start driving, they get braces,get teeth cleaned, xrays, they need their hair done, they need check ups and shots, schooling, activities.. it is so easy to talk crap bc u shell out money when you are not the one waking up at 6am to get them off to school or trying to get to daycare before it closed bc u got hung up at work. trying to get their prescriptions while the pharmacy is still open. Cleaning up puke bc they did not make it to the bathroom or fumbling around for a thermometer in the middle of the night bc they r burning up with fever. Dont complain about being a spouse to someone paying child support bc u knew they had kids before u got with them. Better yet dont complain that u have to go with out bc u think ur needs are more important then your childs. There is this well known thing called birthcontrol. If you do not wanna support them then dont have them. Get fixed. Their are so many deadbeat parents out there. Sign your rights away to the parent/step parent who really wants them. People dont understand how it affects kids when they hear you or your partner complaining bc u have to support them. When they hear that they feel like they are not worth it. I get support and when they r in highschool you have never ending stuff u pay for. They need to feel worthy of high school rings, yearbooks, lunch money, cap and gowns,class pics, new book bags. To be able to play sports or join a club/ Support doesnt cover a car, college, emergencies. Or funerals if such a terrible thing occurs. Everyday things do not show up on the porch alone. nor does tooth paste, deodorant, soap, toilet paper. Really people need to stop putting money before kids needs. I also adopted a child who never recieved anthing from his birth mom. My girls never see their dad and I promise you the hurt and tears they shed is nothing on what he pays. Not even close. When u make the parent doing all the work sound like a golddigger it only hurts the kids. Guidelines are set up for a reason. mom or dad if you cant make it paying support then dont live high on the hog. Kids are only young once. If you rather not pay so you can support your new love interest and what ever children yall produce or they already have then that is really sad bc no matter what the kids did not ask to be born and were here before who u may be with now was ever thought of..Sc may need to change some laws but some people need to change their selves more... Kids are a gift not a burden. Stop looking at it that way!
I feel as though I wrote this post... GREAT JOB!!
Angry mom

United States

#519 Jul 2, 2012
I dont understand how a father can walk away from his kids for almost half their lives and then one day just pop up out of no where wanting to start getting them. I go to the family court to ask do I have to let him see them even tho he his almost $45,000 behind. They say that if its court ordered I have to let him get them.(They hardle even know him.) JUST MAD AS HELL!!!
kane

Anniston, AL

#520 Jul 12, 2012
I have some question for anyone who can help? If you ordered to pay child support and carry your kids on your ins, shouldn't u be allowed to file your kids everyother yr for taxes??? Also my ex was awarded retroactive cs for 2 yrs due to the fact she lied an said we wasn't living together which we were. I was paying her under the table but I do hve sme receipts frm time to time were I did pay her with moneyorders an she also lied about gettin government assistance while we were together is there any way they can pull this info up an I can use it to show she's lying bout the retro an use it in court?????? Also Im payin for ins daycare and cs an the mom is workin as a waitress barely makin it wuts my chances of gettin full custody..
Ray Ray Houston

Euless, TX

#521 Jul 17, 2012
I'm in agreement with you 100% too! The ex's are so busy trying to make it seems like the hard working child support payer is such a bad Dad. They are most likely telling the children that we are not doing anything foto them! Instead, they take care of the men , with your support, while the sorry so called man lays around and help watch for the mail man. That is income that cannot be captured during year end taxes either. The state has never given us an opportunity to willingly take care of our outside children , its always based on what the custodial parent want. When they want more they get it even though we never miss payments .
Allen J

United States

#522 Jul 22, 2012
I'm a mad as hell father, I take damn good care of my son. Im order to pay child support and 5% court cost for my son and to the state when every weekend I get my son and for the entire summer. I also buy everything he needs, well I try to because I barly have enough money to pay my bills. While his mother says " I can'tafford to buy him nothing cause I have bills ". Which she pays for using his check. I mean thats crazy as hell. I think the state should use that court cost to see where the money actually goes instead of pocketing that money. Because, if they did they would see that his money is not bein used on him at all.
scott

United States

#523 Aug 3, 2012
not true, i paysupport and they get very little
Mark

West Columbia, SC

#524 Aug 4, 2012
South Carolina Does make money off of child support. A money order costs .60 to 1.10 to process. Child support is about $15 a payment alot more than the bank would charge. The office does exactly nothing.
Kelly wrote:
I believe some tall tales are being told here but anyway I do have some advice. If you can't afford an attorney, find one that will work for you pro bono, or represent yourself. You don't have to be an attorney to approach the courts, you can act pro se. All you need to do is study up on what is court protocol. It is not HARD, Trust me, been there, and done that, successfully. All it cost me was the filing fee with the court and the expenses I incurred mailing the copies to my spouse. I faced the judge and things were worked out.
Also, SC does NOT make money off of child support payments. They charge a small fee for their administration costs to disburse the money and that is hardly income for them. If anything, it is a loss to the state. If you paid directly on time, there would be no need to go through the courts, now, would there? Maybe some of you see yourself in this post.
Truth hurts sometime.
DRSealey

Lexington, SC

#525 Aug 8, 2012
Eric Knight wrote:
I am a newly married father of 2 beautiful children. I work very hard for my money as well as my new wife. I get my children every other weekend just like the law allows. I have a huge problem with this!!!! I pay 300 dollars a week in child support and hardly can even get by. My ex-wife won't even meet me 1/2 way to pick up and drop off the kids. I live in Columbia, SC and she lives in Lancaster, SC. That is about 100 dollars a month extra in gasoline alone. Not to mention by the time I get off of work and get to my kids its about 8 oclock and then they are sleeping so I don't even get any time with them on Friday evenings. I have battled this over and over and everyones answer is the bi "get an attorney" How am I suppose to get an attorney when I pay all of my money to her??? If it wasn't for my wife I would probably be homeless!!
Its not even fair to my new wife to have to support me that way, but thats the situation I am in. She is a great wife and Loves me and my children and treats them as if she had given birth to them herself. I really would like to some how overcome some of these SC laws some way or another. If there was some way that all of us child support paying fathers that try to do the right thing could all come together like all the other groups in the world and do some good old fashion hell raising at the steps of the state house maybe we would all get somewhere. If there are any of you out there that are sick of being screwed around with email me at guns_n_wrenches@yahoo.com
I don't want to get out of paying support but I think all of us hard working fathers deserve a little more than the state gives.
I'm working on a solution that the custodial parent(male or female,it would not matter) provides initial receipts of child expenses,and through the use of a mediator (provided by CPS at a fee from both parents)and would receive a refund of 50 per cent of the expenses total expenses from the non-custodial parent provided the expenses can be validated. This would be the child support payment. If receipts are not proven or provided credit will not be given. This method will insure child receives credit and not the custodial spouse. This method will lower child support payments to an affordable rate (which married couple actually pays $700.00 a month on their child every month??). The mediator will insure payments are made and visitation rights are faithfully administered. If either parent fails in their duties above the mediator could apply Child neglect to the parent at fault since receipts or expenses are directed for the child. The above plan is still in its infant stage,but I think it is fare and puts the money on the child.(The reason Custodial Parent gets 50 per cent is simple-It took both parents to produce the child, the child was not at fault for the devorce. Therefore, the support for the child should be equally responsibilty for both parents.)
Tammy

Augusta, GA

#526 Aug 23, 2012
I think child support should have a debit card that can only be used for the child kinda like the food stamp card. so they can't use child support money for there own use not sure how you would be able to eliminate certain things being bought but somethings got to work.
Mookas

Huntsville, AL

#527 Sep 30, 2012
IMO wrote:
I'm a woman and it's the truth...SC is hard on some fathers. But,if you're a black woman and your kid's father does not work, they order them to pay pennies every month, while a white man may be told to get a job. Our kids or forced to continue to live in poverty. Also, they do get a fee, whether it's $1 or .50 it adds up when you consider all the payments they receive every month from paying non-custodial parents.
<quoted text>
That's not true, my son pays $$150.00 a week for 1 son. Before she went to DSS to have the child support order, he paid his daycare at $140.00 a week (has the child on his Insurance), and we, myself, as the grandmother bought all of his clothing, Pamper, and watched him quite often. When he went to Dss,with all of the receipts, the woman asked, the mother why are you here, her comment was, I work part-time, and i think that he should be paying more. Her(DSS) comment was, you are able body you can work full-time. So he was ordered the $150.00 per week through direct deposit. The child was 1 at the time. He's almost 5. She stated the other day as soon as he turns 5 she will go back to ask for an increase, by no means do I not want my son to take care of his child, but this young lady gets food stamps, subsidized housing, free daycare, and still works part-time. I asked her to text me a picture of him at the beach, she made a comment, I don't have my i-phone yet. But in the mean time the child's clothing is 2 size to small, she wears coach sneakers and nice clothing, and asking me to buy his school clothes.
Hurting beyond Words

United States

#528 Oct 21, 2012
I am in the same boat as most men....I get only get every other weekend & a few 3hr visit during the week with my 4 year old baby girl. I will have to lose my home to pay the $700 a month child support. We have a no-fault divorce & I didn't ask for this she wants to get as much as $900 a month child support & alimony & left me with $36k of unsecured debt.I am totally shocked how much BS our greedy lawyers feed us & how the court systems railroads us into paying so much money we will never get out the hole again. I could understand if I didn't want to play a major role in my baby's life. I want to see my daughter 50/50. I can work those hrs to make it happen. I am told the court still don't care. I see now why so many people just give up because they r overwhelmed with not only the lose of their family but the financial hardship that follows.
Yvonne SC

Clover, SC

#529 Oct 26, 2012
Thank goodness for the strict laws here in this state. Finally after 13 years of on and off child support payments in MA, a state that did absolutely nothing to find this NCP (non-custodial parent)and allowed it to accrue to an arrearage of just over $22,000 ($100 per week ordered child support) I searched and found him in SC--I had the case relocated to this state because I found out that I have advanced 4B cancer and realized my son deserves to receive some funds should his mother pass away in the near future--cost me 10 months of my time, a whole lot of stress when I should have been focused on my own health and therapy and my own money to show up at the two hearings because here in SC you have to go to court in the county of the NCP but thankfully a SC judge looked at the facts that this NCP has eluded and manipulated the system for far too long. When asked if he had any money to pay for at least 10% of the arrears he stated he didn't and when asked why he said he had his sick animal to take care of--disgusting that a parent could even say that to a judge, the judge was flabbergasted and ordered him to 6 months jail sentence. Within hours the NCP was able to convince his boss to pay it for him--so incredibly sad that I even had a child with this pathetic individual and just happy now that my son will start getting money consistently hopefully from now on, unless the NCP jumps to another state hoping not to be found once again like so many times before. To all parents do what is right for the babies you chose to bring into this world-be an example to your child/children.
NOT happy with SC

Rock Hill, SC

#530 Nov 27, 2012
what the hell, SC does NOT look at your bills, they look at both incomes and come up with a payment, SC forget if you where together you would NOT have seperate bills, 2-house payment, 2-cars, ext..each parent pays...so the man pays full payment with 1/2 the money..the mom pays her payment with the extra child support money..if you where together you would have both icomes to pay only one house payment..ext.So its ok that i work 3 jobs to keep me out of jail, when she only works when she wants to...why not she get extra money!!! and SC does not care how much is going to the childs needs, the mom drops her off at the baby sitter and off to the beach..So i pay for my daughter $700, and i have no money to raise my son with..if the mother and father where together they would not spend as much money together as they spend as single person would. a single mother wants money to pay for her house car..ext..WHY? she was not living in a tent when i met her WHY do i have to pay for her living expense!!!
I have a son at my home and it does NOT take $700 a month to support my son at my house, why does it take $700 at her house????
Stacey

Sylacauga, AL

#532 Dec 15, 2012
I am a single mom myself. I worked with my childs father on the child support he could still live comfortably and pay child support. The only reason I did it was because i didnt make her on my own and shouldnt have to carry everything on my own. He pays 300 a month and carries her on his insurance. We were never married but he kicked us both out and told me he couldnt keep her a few days until i found a place because the neighbors said she cried too loudly. So we had to stay with my mom a few days until i got a place. He moved this other chick in two days after kicking us out. He wanted nothing to do with his daughter. NOTHING! Everytime his new gf which he married after three months ditched him then he wanted to see her. So i let him because it was the right thing to do. She would come back hungry terrified of everything and most of all so clingy to me that i thought she was being abused. I kept her away after that. Even had legal advice telling me he had no rights so dont make her go back so i did not. Now i am in court with him fighting like hell cause his life has gone to hell he got a divorce and has nothing and all of a sudden wants to be a father. Mind you he let his cousins son sexually assault her too. And there is not a damn thing i can do about it. So he gets visitation and im left with a tormented daughter. So men you arent the only ones who get the shit end of the stick so stop complaining and do the best you can with what you got. Because all of us women are not bad.
single mother

Myrtle Beach, SC

#533 Dec 26, 2012
My husband and I have been seperated for over a year now.. He left saying he would just sign the rights to his son away... He was leaving us for a cousin and her two kids of which he had been making my son talk to via the computer... He was dumped by her and lost his job because he was acting like a teenage boy at work.. He gets another job and says well I dont know if or when i can see him... I can not get him(the father) off my insurance til the first of the year so I have footed all bills, child care, medical, and all expenses for the last year.. He still will not pay me a dime.... So when we finally do go to court i hope that they stick it to him... My son has had to do without a lot of things he used to have because we dont have the money for it with no help... I work full time and pay 600.00 a month in health insurance alone.... Before you pass judgement on some of these woman think about the ones who have sacrificed and most always it is the children......
Grandmother

Florence, SC

#534 Dec 27, 2012
I am the grandmother of 2 beautiful little boys. They and their single mom live with me and my husband. The father of the boys has been useless in supporting them. Mom works and I watch kids. The dad works for friends and is paid cash to avoid paying $100 a week child support. We have provided for these kids their entire life. The dad has been given every opportunity to do the right thing. He is thousands of dollars behind and when it is time to go to court in Lancaster County they get him to pay 500.00 to stay out of jail and then he doesn't pay after that until mom forces court to do something and the cycle begins again. He talks with the kids sporatically but every time visitation is set he either curses mom out or gets high and disappears for days. He accepts no responsibility for them but wants to "show them off" as his boys to others. I am sick to death of men fathering children and thinking there is no responsibility to take care of them. They make sure their lives are comfortable but the care of the kids are left to anyone who will do it. Mom struggles to make a good home for her children but can't keep her head above water because the father doesn't do what he is suppose to do. The children suffer, the Mom suffers, we, the grandparents, suffer. He goes on with life as usual. It is time the Lancaster County, SC Courts do something about the useless fathers out their. Post them on line, in newspapers, on bullentin boards at Wal-Mart or anywhere else possible. Let the world see these men are nothing more than sperm donars when they don't take care of their kids. I'm fed up with them!!!!!!!!!

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Columbia Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
News Lexington County towns seek road repairs and mo... (Dec '13) Apr 23 Theresa 3
News Man Post Fliers With Explicit Photos of His Ex-... (Apr '07) Apr 22 sorry 6
Dr Martin Luther King Jr Died For Nothing!!!!! Apr 22 U a Yagami 4
News Lexington Poker Ring: Where "The Tape" Came From (Aug '12) Apr 20 snickering 96
Read about the 3 Hebrew Boys and CCG (Jun '07) Apr 19 Fax 2,530
Review: Auditory Disorders Center Apr 18 Esoteric 1
holy temple church of the lord jesus christ of ... (Mar '13) Apr 16 Jukebox 511
More from around the web

Columbia People Search

Addresses and phone numbers for FREE

Personal Finance

Mortgages [ See current mortgage rates ]