Living in Columbia
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“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#1 Oct 24, 2012
I'm new to Topix and I know many of the posts that I'm reading are old but I read one in the Redbud forum and basically it was a lot of people bashing their town and a few trying hard to stand up for where they call home.
I wanted to post on this thread because I lived there before moving to Columbia and I was sad to see some of the posts. I am posting here as well because I would like to compliment Columbia as well. Thank you for allowing me to voice my opinion.
***Redbud is a nice small town. I moved there 5 years ago from a much bigger town to be with my partner. I never met any rude or unfriendly people, was never judged or treated unfairly. My son went to RBHS & wasn't treated as an outsider ever and the teachers there were awesome. Our family rented 3 different places and had awesome landlords 2/3 times, the only bad experience was from an owner wanting to rent to someone who would pay more than our lease was for but that's ok, no hard feelings. Our doctor is at Redbud Regional and she and her staff are wonderful. We attended church there and were never shunned because we are a gay couple. The town is absolutely beautiful during the holidays and the local businesses all were very nice.
We moved to Columbia because it is much closer to work for my partner and we have found pretty much the same attitudes & acceptance here that we did in Redbud and Columbia is also a very pretty town. We still come to Redbud to see the doctor or visit friends. I'm sure there are "negative" things that happen in both towns as some have mentioned here but in comparison to bigger towns/cities it really isn't a huge problem. Every town has issues and trouble makers but you have to overlook them as best you can and worry about your own business and lives. Those that name call and tell lies about others are usually just unhappy with their own life and try to bring other people down as well. If you want to post a truth about something then sure post it, but make sure you have the facts and/or can someway back up what your saying as the truth.
My point is basically, support your town, treat others as you'd hope to be treated and be the best YOU that you can be. Life is way to short to hate, discriminate those who are different than you or disrespect someone just because they have a different opinion on something than you do. And remember, it is not up to us to ever judge another person for any reason.
If you are unhappy where you live, move if you can. If you don't like something someone does, don't join them and if your unhappy in your life make every effort you can to find happiness and better yourself when the opportunity arises.
I am originally from MO and love my hometown but I very much like where I call home now and plan on staying here for quite a while. IL may have its problems but Redbud & Columbia really aren't one of them.
(Waterloo isn't too bad either and I have only had one issue there in the 5 years I have currently lived in IL).
So thank you small town Illinois and those of you that have been so nice and friendly. God bless you.
Welcome wagon

Columbia, IL

#2 Oct 24, 2012
Before all the standard negative posts by trolls start...

Welcome to the town! We're glad to have another family that likes places that are nice to live. We also hope the family enjoys your time here!
purplehed

Alton, IL

#3 Oct 24, 2012
I am glad that you found acceptance as a gay couple.

This is important to me because I am a gay man.
618 Always

Waterloo, IL

#4 Oct 24, 2012
Yay!! I love seeing a positive thread started!!

Thanks for sharing your story, it was very refreshing.:)

Welcome to Columbia, Best wishes!!

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#5 Oct 24, 2012
Welcome wagon wrote:
Before all the standard negative posts by trolls start...

Welcome to the town! We're glad to have another family that likes places that are nice to live. We also hope the family enjoys your time here!
Thank you Welcome Wagon!! She and I have been here almost 3 years already and we do enjoy life here and my son really likes it here when he comes to visit as well. He's 21 so he's already "flown the coop" so to speak. Lol

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#6 Oct 24, 2012
purplehed wrote:
I am glad that you found acceptance as a gay couple.

This is important to me because I am a gay man.
Yes purplehed we really have and it is very nice to be allowed to be who we are. Honestly in our almost 6 years as a couple we have never been looked at as anything but just who we are and gratefully we have never had a mean or rude comment or look when we are out in town. I truly believe that this has a lot to do with the fact that we don't flaunt ourselves or demonstrate overly aggressive PDA. We do hold hands when we want to or give each other a hug when in public but we don't force our relationship on others and are very aware when in a situation or place where it may be inappropriate to be affectionate. This just seems like common sense for any couple straight or gay.
I really hope that you are as lucky in your life as us and experience as much acceptance and support as we have found. Everyone regardless of their sexual orientation and/or beliefs deserves to be treated fairly and equally. I wish you much happiness and love. God bless you!
miss manners

Columbia, IL

#7 Oct 24, 2012
if you have been accepted here in columbia then you must live in the new housing areas. Its sad, but there are two columbias, the new areas with modern thinking and acceptance of different races and lifestyles, and OLD columbia. If you are not born and bred white/straight/catholic/german ...well you should just move on. The really sad part is that these people don't want to admit, even to themselves, that they are now in the minority here and thier numbers shrink more every day. Hopefully we can start voting in newcommers for office, people that want to build a future for ALL columbians and not just keep running the good-ole-boy network we have now.

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#8 Oct 24, 2012
618 Always wrote:
Yay!! I love seeing a positive thread started!!

Thanks for sharing your story, it was very refreshing.:)

Welcome to Columbia, Best wishes!!
Thank you very much 618 Always! I honestly started this thread because of all the hate and meanness I had seen in my hometown forums. I was ashamed of what i read. And just to clarify, I'm referring to mean & hateful posts in general, not discriminatory ones. And then I read some of the same kind of posts in local threads as well, although not nearly as terrible.
I just wanted to be able make a post showing how not all people are mean spirited and actually love and accept their fellow man, or woman as in my case, lol. I wish that my hometown could take a lesson from Columbia and start to realize how much happier everyone could be if they all just tried acceptance, loving their neighbors & basically just treating people with respect.
Thank you very much for your well wishes, I hope that you have a very wonderful week!'
boom

Millstadt, IL

#9 Oct 24, 2012
i'm glad you're making yourself at home here. i happen to think it's a great place to live! i've lived here all my life, and contrary to what miss manners said i don't think "old columbia" and "new columbia" exist. i am german and catholic and columbian, but not as close-minded as some would assume. if you were a native you'd know that we don't care what your sexual orientation as long as you like to drink beer at community events.

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#10 Oct 25, 2012
miss manners wrote:
if you have been accepted here in columbia then you must live in the new housing areas. Its sad, but there are two columbias, the new areas with modern thinking and acceptance of different races and lifestyles, and OLD columbia. If you are not born and bred white/straight/catholic/german ...well you should just move on. The really sad part is that these people don't want to admit, even to themselves, that they are now in the minority here and thier numbers shrink more every day. Hopefully we can start voting in newcommers for office, people that want to build a future for ALL columbians and not just keep running the good-ole-boy network we have now.
Hi Miss Manners!! I don't know where old & new Columbia are, didn't actually realize there were two parts. I live in the Columbia Lakes Area, I'm guessing that's new Columbia?
As far as being accepted, I haven't seen or felt a difference in any part of town. Of course what I call acceptance may very well be seen as just tolerance by others but either way I haven't felt unwelcome anywhere. I hope that this continues to be my experience here as well as for others.
I would guess that what is considered "old" Columbia is probably similar to the "old" areas of most towns and probably the residents of those areas are primarily the older population of people who are just from a different era as well. Their views are usually not as open minded or acceptant of modern ways of life as the younger population. This doesn't make them bad people or even wrong, they just have different ideas and views and they have that right. You are probably right that these folks are now the minority and that's basically because as they pass away their numbers decrease.
I believe that it's only to be expected that as the newer generations age they will inevitably be the ones voted into office so hopefully Columbia will evolve into a community for everyone regardless of who they are.
There will ultimately be some form of the good-ole-boy network in every town, not just Columbia, but hopefully in time the caring, accepting, tolerant and fair population will be the ones in control.
I do realize that my hopes & views are probably not based in reality but I think that in time change is inevitable and with any luck our society will grow and become one based on reality and facts. There will always be haters & negativity but with any luck there will also be equal rights and laws based on reality and truth.
Sorry this was so long but the subject you brought up was a very important one and couldn't be addressed in just a few sentences.:-)
And just to let people know, I am very much a Christian and believe in a loving and forgiving God and go to a wonderful church who is accepting of ALL people. I believe in separation of church and state and feel that religion should not be used to make laws because not everyone believes the same way or are the same religion and they have that right. Government is there to make the laws and to protect each and every citizens constitutional rights and that includes the right to believe however you want. It's not up to me to judge anyone or tell you what to do.
Hope this didn't bore anyone to sleep, lol.
Have a great week!!

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#11 Oct 25, 2012
boom wrote:
i'm glad you're making yourself at home here. i happen to think it's a great place to live! i've lived here all my life, and contrary to what miss manners said i don't think "old columbia" and "new columbia" exist. i am german and catholic and columbian, but not as close-minded as some would assume. if you were a native you'd know that we don't care what your sexual orientation as long as you like to drink beer at community events.
Hi Boom! I really don't know about there being an "old" and "new" Columbia, I do however respect the opinion that there could be. As my long winded response to Miss Manners stated I haven't ever really seen or felt a difference anywhere in town. I think the demographics of Columbia are probable very similar to a lot of small towns but that's just my thoughts, I have no facts to base that opinion on. I love that your a life long Columbian and open minded as well, just proves what I have experienced so far here in town.
And I guess I'm gonna have to start drinking beer!!!
Thanks for your post and kind words.

whoknows

Fenton, MO

#12 Oct 25, 2012
Unfortunately there is a bit of a divide between the two "Columbias".
As a transplant myself, I find neither side of town to be in a position to speak negatively of the other - they *BOTH* have serious issues.
Regarding the older part, yes, it is mostly Columbia natives but they have aged. They will be gone in their own time.
Fortunately, many of those (at least the ones I've met) moving into those parts of old Columbia, do not share the same values as the generations from before and tend to be more open minded than even those in "New Columbia".
Unfortunately, a majority of the "New Columbians" I have dealt with are of the 'entitled' sort, and expect such treatment from their community too. Like the world needs more snooty people?
I also suffer from a situation where many know me, but I am unaware of them. This rather complicates things a bit, for me.

However, overall, aside from some insane thinking coming from City Hall once in a while (can we say "widen Main Street?"), the community is a really nice one (even with grossly exagerated property values).

Please do not let most of the other posts here on Topix mislead you - those are [fortunately] from a minority in town who tend to spread their misery in their wake.

Columbia *IS* a beautiful town, with some equally beautiful people in it. There are some rather wonderful ammenities, and a community feel that I have not found anywhere else in the area (in spite of undesirables - that _every_ community has).

It takes a community to raise children. All-in-all, I am not quite certain my family and I could have done better anywhere else on the East side of the Mississippi (in Illinois). I was born and raised in Illinois, and am extremely familiar with at least a dozen counties east of the river.
Considering the distance to downtown St. Louis (20 minutes), there is nowhere better to have chosen to live, for me and my family.

Welcome to Columbia and may your family enjoy it as much as mine does.
Ballwin speaks

Waterloo, IL

#13 Oct 25, 2012
whoknows wrote:
Unfortunately there is a bit of a divide between the two "Columbias", fostered mostly by people like me who want rampant development through the use of TIF to change this town.
As a transplant myself, I find neither side of town to be in a position to speak negatively of the other - they *BOTH* have serious issues.
Regarding the older part, yes, it is mostly Columbia natives but they have aged. I hopethey will be gone in their own time.
Fortunately, many of those (at least the ones I've met) moving into those parts of old Columbia, do not share the same values as the generations from before and tend to be more greedy and care to work less than the old German types..
Unfortunately, a majority of the "New Columbians" I have dealt with are of the 'entitled' sort, and expect such treatment from their community too. Like the world needs more snooty people?
I also suffer from a situation where many know me, but I am an idiot. This rather complicates things a bit, for me.
However, overall, aside from some insane thinking coming from City Hall once in a while (can we say "widen Main Street?"), the community is a really nice one .
Considering the distance to downtown St. Louis (20 minutes), there is nowhere better to have chosen to live, for me and my family.
Welcome to Columbia and may you two lezboes live happily ever after.
BALLWIN your such a liar. Your a carpetbagger profit monger.
whoknows

Fenton, MO

#14 Oct 25, 2012
Funny, I'm not from, nor in, Ballwin.

Nor am I the poster you think I am ;-)
whoknows

Fenton, MO

#15 Oct 25, 2012
Nicely done, however, editing the original post.

Too bad you are so very clueless.
Ballwin speaks

Waterloo, IL

#16 Oct 25, 2012
Bally why the class warfare schtick , kinda taken a page from the Obama the rich are our enemy and from you a big republican, shame on you.
Ballwin speaks

Waterloo, IL

#17 Oct 25, 2012
Bally why the class warfare tactic, kinda like Obama strategy to scapegoat the rich.And from such a well bred republican. Tell the people how you would do the Midas touch TIF to develop and destroy all that Columbia Is in the name of progress, and to blame the old Germans and to say you hope they die off. Shame on you Bally.
Terry

United States

#18 Oct 25, 2012
miss manners wrote:
if you have been accepted here in columbia then you must live in the new housing areas. Its sad, but there are two columbias, the new areas with modern thinking and acceptance of different races and lifestyles, and OLD columbia. If you are not born and bred white/straight/catholic/german ...well you should just move on. The really sad part is that these people don't want to admit, even to themselves, that they are now in the minority here and thier numbers shrink more every day. Hopefully we can start voting in newcommers for office, people that want to build a future for ALL columbians and not just keep running the good-ole-boy network we have now.
Not all of us.....I am white,American of German descent,heterosexual,and Catholic, and by you standards would probably be considered a good ole boy.I have friends that live lifestyles alternative to mine and fully support them. Welcome to town "Love my Life"

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#19 Oct 25, 2012
whoknows wrote:
Unfortunately there is a bit of a divide between the two "Columbias".
As a transplant myself, I find neither side of town to be in a position to speak negatively of the other - they *BOTH* have serious issues.
Regarding the older part, yes, it is mostly Columbia natives but they have aged. They will be gone in their own time.
Fortunately, many of those (at least the ones I've met) moving into those parts of old Columbia, do not share the same values as the generations from before and tend to be more open minded than even those in "New Columbia".
Unfortunately, a majority of the "New Columbians" I have dealt with are of the 'entitled' sort, and expect such treatment from their community too. Like the world needs more snooty people?
I also suffer from a situation where many know me, but I am unaware of them. This rather complicates things a bit, for me.

However, overall, aside from some insane thinking coming from City Hall once in a while (can we say "widen Main Street?"), the community is a really nice one (even with grossly exagerated property values).

Please do not let most of the other posts here on Topix mislead you - those are [fortunately] from a minority in town who tend to spread their misery in their wake.

Columbia *IS* a beautiful town, with some equally beautiful people in it. There are some rather wonderful ammenities, and a community feel that I have not found anywhere else in the area (in spite of undesirables - that _every_ community has).

It takes a community to raise children. All-in-all, I am not quite certain my family and I could have done better anywhere else on the East side of the Mississippi (in Illinois). I was born and raised in Illinois, and am extremely familiar with at least a dozen counties east of the river.
Considering the distance to downtown St. Louis (20 minutes), there is nowhere better to have chosen to live, for me and my family.

Welcome to Columbia and may your family enjoy it as much as mine does.
Thank you for the welcome whoknows! I am glad that for the most part you have found Columbia as pleasant as we have.

“God loves you!”

Since: Oct 12

Cape Girardeau/Jackson

#20 Oct 25, 2012
Terry wrote:
<quoted text>Not all of us.....I am white,American of German descent,heterosexual,and Catholic, and by you standards would probably be considered a good ole boy.I have friends that live lifestyles alternative to mine and fully support them. Welcome to town "Love my Life"
Hi Terry! It's very awesome that you support your friends even though they're "different" than you, and I'm sure that their respecting and supporting you as well is just as awesome. Loving and supporting others is how we're all meant to be. And really if we were all exactly the same life would be quite dull.
Thanks for the welcome, have a beautiful day!

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