How often do you take a dump?

[Health Nut]

Wow! Wow! Wow! What a wonderful question about a very important subject. This is a topic of interest that will sit the internet on fire and will contribute greatly to the medical library of knowledge. Thank you Dr. Schloninski, Dr. Salk has absolutely nothing on you. You will take your place among the pantheon of medical rearch deities. You are the greatest!!! Keep up the good work.

[Thor Peters]

This is great! Love it! A wonderful subject that is of interest to everyone and one that is material to everybody's life. Dr. Schloninski you are the greatest, you will be remembered with the same honor and respect that is afforded Louis Pasteur. Keep these "health subject" polls a coming...they're fantastic.

[Jack Meihoff]

OUTSTANDING!!! WONDERFUL!!! GREAT!!! This is the best thing I HAVE EVER SEEN posted on Topix!!! I am absolutely fascinated by this subject, I ask people this question all the time whether I'm standing line at Wal-Mart, getting my hair cut, washing my car, paying for groceries at Dillons, I mean all the time. The nice thing about this with an anonomyous poll, people will give a true answer instead of the standard, "Uh well, I guess once a day". Keep this up, finally we'll have an answer to a question that is burning in most people's minds. So great and so wonderful!!!

[Ima Strainun]

Does it get any better than this? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!!! This is a great web site. I love this question it really got me to thinking about my habits, especially how often I break off a chunk. I do have a suggestion however. Why didn't you also ask about wipeing technique. I go from front to back, some people go from back to front and I understand that some people just swirl it around. What is the correct way to wipe? Please let me know it's very important to me that I use the right technique. Again thanks Dr. Schlonginski for this poll, it's great.

[Native American]

As a Native American this poll addresses one of the core beliefs of our Native American faith. That is of course the belief that taking a dump is a gift given by the Great Spirit for the benefit of all people. The more often a person takes a dump the more gifts are given by the Great Spirit to this individual. Great topic, great poll, keep them coming. This is wonderful.

[daughter of a lesbian]

you know you are old if all you can talk about is your bowel habbits. Not gross to me, i am a RN. But why would anyone else need to know how often someone has a BM???

[Rocket Scientist]

As you can tell from my name, I am a world famous scientist. My life is based upon blazing the frontiers of human knowledge. This poll is assisting all who have an inquisitive mind in their quest to answer one of the deepest human questions, "How often do you take a dump?". A simple question yes but so was the theory of relativity. Please keep questions like this out there, they are needed and very important. I take a dump once a week.

[Medical Doctor]

daughter of a lesbian wrote:

you know you are old if all you can talk about is your bowel habbits. Not gross to me, i am a RN. But why would anyone else need to know how often someone has a BM???

Although you are a RN, that does not make you a DOCTOR like ME!!! As a doctor I know that more people should take the issue of making pooh pooh or taking a dump much more seriously than they do. I've known people who have live an otherwise healthy life style that ignored their dumping habits and shortened their life by about a jillion years!!! You should be advising your patients about the importance of taking a dump. Take it from me I've saved about a jillion million lives by talking to everybody I know about their dump habits and contents!!! Do not treat this subject lightly it could save your life and the lives of countless others!!!

[Homopath]

Medical Doctor wrote:

<quoted text>
Although you are a RN, that does not make you a DOCTOR like ME!!! As a doctor I know that more people should take the issue of making pooh pooh or taking a dump much more seriously than they do. I've known people who have live an otherwise healthy life style that ignored their dumping habits and shortened their life by about a jillion years!!! You should be advising your patients about the importance of taking a dump. Take it from me I've saved about a jillion million lives by talking to everybody I know about their dump habits and contents!!! Do not treat this subject lightly it could save your life and the lives of countless others!!!

I get so tired MDs like you who think that they have all the answers. However I'm glad to see that the "Official" medical community has finally realized the importance of taking a dump. As a homopath I've spent my entire professional life preaching the importance of regular "dumping". Finally you in the "Official" medical community are paying attention. It's about time!!!!!

[Finney Co Native]

Dear Dr. Schlonginski; Thanks for this wonderful poll subject. I have been fortunate to be your patient for many years here in Finney Co. Your skills in the area of dumpology have brought fame and prosperity to the Schlonginski School of Dumping and also to our community. Garden City is now a mecca of healing for those with problems in the area of "dumping", "breaking off a chunk" and of course "pinching a loaf". Thanks so much for all that you've done and congratulations for bring "dumping" out of the closet and into the bright light of medical science. You are a genius.

[True American]

Thank you Dr. Schlonginski for posting this poll. Thanks to modern technology I am taking a dump as I am responding to this poll. In fact I'm dropping a huge bomb right now. Boy that felt good. Okay, as I was saying thanks for putting this out for everyone to read. Wow, I just broke off another huge chunk, I feel better now. Anyway keep it going and fellow readers keep responding to this poll, it's great.

[Sid Goldstein]

True American wrote:

Thank you Dr. Schlonginski for posting this poll. Thanks to modern technology I am taking a dump as I am responding to this poll. In fact I'm dropping a huge bomb right now. Boy that felt good. Okay, as I was saying thanks for putting this out for everyone to read. Wow, I just broke off another huge chunk, I feel better now. Anyway keep it going and fellow readers keep responding to this poll, it's great.

Hey man, thanks for writing in, I thought I was the only dude who surfed while taking a dump. I mean isn't this wonderful. I'm taking a dump right now too. Ohhh, wow I just dropped one about the size of a potato. Wow, that felt good. Hold on a minute.....thanks for waiting...man I pinched off about three in a row that had to be watermelon size. You know there is nothing I love better than sitting on the hopper and dropping bombs!!! This is so great!!! Thanks for posting this poll, it's great!!!

[Mountain Man]

Thanks for posting this poll. This morning I looked to the east and watched the sun rise over the plains. As I watched I saw the ghosts of mammonth, buffalo and the indegenous people of ten thousand years in the past as they marched across the sunlit horizon. I paused in wonder then broke off a huge chunk and imagined what it must have been for a mammoth or a buffalo to have pinched off a loaf just as I was doing and marveled at the circle of life. I then let go of a low growling fart and thought of how much that must have sounded like the saber tooth cats that stalked the huge buffalo in their quest for a meal. How wonderous, how beautiful, how typical of this great plains region. Thanks again and thanks for posting this poll, it's wonderful.

[Garden City Dude]

Dr. Schlonginski; Thanks so much for posting this poll and starting this discussion group. I hope that I'm not out of line and if I am my deepest apologizes but why wasn't the subject of farting and fart sniffing omitted from this poll? I know that you can't make room for everything but I view farting when taking a dump as analogous to the "bubbles in the champagne". Farting is what makes taking a good old dump worth the time spent on the hopper. Not only do I love to fart but I also am a fart sniffing connisseur. There is nothing, outside of smelling my own farts, that I enjoy more than taking a deep whiff of someone elses farts. I am particularly fond of smelling the fart of someone who has overloaded on egg salad or cabbage and beef. It is wonderful to fill ones sinuses with the wonderful odor of one of those babies. Anyway please keep up the good work. I would also love to hear from other fart sniffers in the Garden City area. Thanks

[True American]

Hey Dr. Schlonginski - Thanks for posting this poll it's great. To "Garden City Dude" I appreciate the fact that you love to sniff farts. I do too, however there is a poll for that. Let's don't confuse the issue. Please keep your comments to dumping, breaking off a chunk, pinching a loaf, etc. This poll could really degenerate if we don't all play by the rules. Thanks.

[Regge Holle]

As a dumpologist I am very pleased to see that the subject of taking a dump is finally recognized for what it is, a natural fun thing to do that is worthy of discussion. Most people that I know secretly value their dump time and view it as the high light of their day. I know that I do and so do all of my friends. In fact communal dumping has became very popular in my hometown, (Kalvesta) and is extensively practiced in the community that I live in (Chaleston). Again thanks for this discussion, it's wonderful.

[Dump Fanatic]

"To fart is to try, to fart over and over again is a prelude to pinching off a loaf which is an accomplishment." ~~Marilyn Van Sant~~ I thought I would pass this along, this is a wonderful quote and one which will make you really think. Thanks for this poll and discussion group, it's really a great public service.

[Garden City Dude]

True American wrote:

Hey Dr. Schlonginski - Thanks for posting this poll it's great. To "Garden City Dude" I appreciate the fact that you love to sniff farts. I do too, however there is a poll for that. Let's don't confuse the issue. Please keep your comments to dumping, breaking off a chunk, pinching a loaf, etc. This poll could really degenerate if we don't all play by the rules. Thanks.

True American, thanks for getting me straight. Also thanks for pointing out the "fart sniffing" discussion. It's exactly what I'm looking for. I realize that this poll is for dumping purist. I respect that and will keep all discussion confined to taking a dump, breaking off a chunk or pinching a loaf. Great topic, please keep it up.

[Garden City Dude]

daughter of a lesbian wrote:

you know you are old if all you can talk about is your bowel habbits. Not gross to me, i am a RN. But why would anyone else need to know how often someone has a BM???

Hey, I respect you for being an RN. Why don't you show the same respect to dumpophiles? You have your interests, I as a dumpophile am interesting in one thing and one thing only; that is taking a dump. That is my hobby and when my friends and I get together we really enjoy chatting about it. Please respect me as I respect you.

[Chunkster]

I've seen a couple of quotes out here that I really like. Here's another one that I thought was really neat. "If you are like farting and you strain and then you feel something warm and gooey in your pants and it sorta stinks, you probably took a dump in your pants" ~~ Albert Einsten ~~. Isn't that neat? I thought I would share that with the world. Great poll, keep it up!!!