need help!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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lost

United States

#1 Mar 26, 2013
What would you do if the love of your life after 8 years and gave everything up for and I'm the mother of his child and took on the responsibles at when you where only 16 to care for there child. Wants to call it quites bc you tell him if he don't stop doing the illegal stuff he does or he's losing a great girlfriend and mother and his youngest child. What would you do. Don't get me wrong he's a good dad and has a good job. But he doesn't put his family first and always makes it out that I'm the bad person.

“Loving husband of Mrs cowface”

Since: Jan 12

Chillicothe OH

#2 Mar 26, 2013
Take a breath, be at peace, and go to bed and get some sleep. When you wake up take a look at it all over again. Think & pray about it. You made a demand. Try approaching it more domestically. Tread lightly if the relationship is important to you.... "baby steps"

Since: Jan 13

Lexington, KY

#3 Mar 26, 2013
lost wrote:
What would you do if the love of your life after 8 years and gave everything up for and I'm the mother of his child and took on the responsibles at when you where only 16 to care for there child. Wants to call it quites bc you tell him if he don't stop doing the illegal stuff he does or he's losing a great girlfriend and mother and his youngest child. What would you do. Don't get me wrong he's a good dad and has a good job. But he doesn't put his family first and always makes it out that I'm the bad person.
He isnt putting his family first when he engages in illegal activities.It is putting you and the children at risk.If he has such a good job why is he jeopordizing that to do illlegal things?
Wtf

United States

#4 Mar 26, 2013
Walk away before your child follows in his footsteps. It's not about you when there is a child involved. Trust me....I made the mistake of stayin in a bad relationship with a selfish ass and I still pay the price with the disrespect I am shown on occasion from my child that I had with that guy. It's better now but, he has been out of our lives for almost 10 years and it still affects us. Think about what is best for your child. You are the parent first and girlfriend second! Be responsible and ensure your child grows up knowing that they are first no matter what!

“Loving husband of Mrs cowface”

Since: Jan 12

Chillicothe OH

#5 Mar 26, 2013
Well first you said he is the "love of your life" and you've got a good bit of time and a child invested together. It is always best to sleep on it. I am not condoning his illegal activity, but "love the sinner, hate the sin". Take it slow and see what results. You may have already done this for some time. You alone can judge this.
lost

Chillicothe, OH

#6 Mar 26, 2013
cowface wrote:
Take a breath, be at peace, and go to bed and get some sleep. When you wake up take a look at it all over again. Think & pray about it. You made a demand. Try approaching it more domestically. Tread lightly if the relationship is important to you.... "baby steps"
I did approach it domestically I told him he had till Monday to see if its worth loosing his family and well he pretty much told me tonight that its worth loosing his family over. So by rights in the state of ohio does a father have any rights to a child even thought there name is on the birth certificet and we are not married. I have been trying my hardest for the past 3 years to make it work bc I love him more then anything in the world besides our child and his other child. I try to make it work bc I love him and I don't want my child to grow up without mommy and daddy being together me and him both went through it and well I thought that's what we both wanted I know I do but I don't think he does anymore. He thinks he's unstoppable and nothing he does is wrong. In the worst thing about is if I do leave I don't have any place to go I gave everything up for him I don't have friends and I don't live close to any family and I don't have an l's to be able to just up and go.

“Loving husband of Mrs cowface”

Since: Jan 12

Chillicothe OH

#7 Mar 26, 2013
Illegal stuff is a broad term... how illegal is it? Is he driving 60 in a 55 mi zone... or running a Meth Lab? The severity of the crime warrants the severity of your actions.
lost

Chillicothe, OH

#8 Mar 26, 2013
I always think what's best for my child. I think about it all the time. I think what if I do leave she will think that mommys the one that left daddy and don't want her to hate me for it later. I think about both kids first bc I know I can't take the oldest one with me and I wish I could bc the very first time I met her she called me mommy. Yea her mom is in her life but only when her mom wants to. She thinks of me as her mom more then her own mom. In I know if I do leave it will crush her as well.
lost

Chillicothe, OH

#10 Mar 26, 2013
I would rather not say what he does just in case he does get on here and sees this but he don't run a meth lab. I know I don't know any of you but thanks for telling me what you think bc I don't have anyone to talk to about anything bc I don't have any friends to talk to bc the friends we do have he makes them think I'm the bad person bc I b**ch at him all the time for what he does and never wants to do anything with his family. Its always about what his friends want and need before his family and they here me sometimes b**ching at him. I know I shouldn't do that but I have to stand up for what I want right?
lost

Chillicothe, OH

#11 Mar 26, 2013
joanna50 wrote:
<quoted text>He isnt putting his family first when he engages in illegal activities.It is putting you and the children at risk.If he has such a good job why is he jeopordizing that to do illlegal things?
He says bc he's not happy and its not me that doesn't make him that way he says he's happy with me but not with his life and I told him if that's the case only he can change it not anyone else
jeff

Columbus, OH

#12 Mar 26, 2013
Leave him for me I work at arena email me [email protected]
jeff

Columbus, OH

#13 Mar 26, 2013
Arena sorry
lost

Chillicothe, OH

#15 Mar 26, 2013
Jeff where's that at. In sorry I wouldn't be able to leave this one and get right into a different one I have put 8 years into this one and engaged and a child. In it seems to me meeting ppl off the internet don't reallly work out to well for me..

Since: Jan 13

Lexington, KY

#16 Mar 26, 2013
lost wrote:
I would rather not say what he does just in case he does get on here and sees this but he don't run a meth lab. I know I don't know any of you but thanks for telling me what you think bc I don't have anyone to talk to about anything bc I don't have any friends to talk to bc the friends we do have he makes them think I'm the bad person bc I b**ch at him all the time for what he does and never wants to do anything with his family. Its always about what his friends want and need before his family and they here me sometimes b**ching at him. I know I shouldn't do that but I have to stand up for what I want right?
If the illegal activity is drug related in any way you are putting your kids and yourself at risk in case of arrest as you can be arrested as well then what would happen to your kid?It sounds as if you have already decided since you said you have no money and no place to go in any case i wish you the best and encourage you to seek other avenues of frienship,church,social groups like a book club volunteer some where and pray he stops this activity.
jeff

Columbus, OH

#18 Mar 26, 2013
Come live with me
jeff

Columbus, OH

#19 Mar 26, 2013
Email me lets make it work.. adena hospital

Since: Jan 13

Lexington, KY

#20 Mar 26, 2013
lost wrote:
<quoted text>
He says bc he's not happy and its not me that doesn't make him that way he says he's happy with me but not with his life and I told him if that's the case only he can change it not anyone else
Sounds like he needs a different hobby if he is bored with his life there are other exciting things to do than illegal activities.
jeff

Columbus, OH

#21 Mar 26, 2013
Come live with me will you email me make us a forever

“Loving husband of Mrs cowface”

Since: Jan 12

Chillicothe OH

#22 Mar 26, 2013
lost wrote:
<quoted text>
I did approach it domestically I told him he had till Monday to see if its worth loosing his family and well he pretty much told me tonight that its worth loosing his family over. So by rights in the state of ohio does a father have any rights to a child even thought there name is on the birth certificet and we are not married. I have been trying my hardest for the past 3 years to make it work bc I love him more then anything in the world besides our child and his other child. I try to make it work bc I love him and I don't want my child to grow up without mommy and daddy being together me and him both went through it and well I thought that's what we both wanted I know I do but I don't think he does anymore. He thinks he's unstoppable and nothing he does is wrong. In the worst thing about is if I do leave I don't have any place to go I gave everything up for him I don't have friends and I don't live close to any family and I don't have an l's to be able to just up and go.
You gave him till Monday... that is an ultimatum. It is also on you as an ultimatum. If you must separate, put it on him, not yourself. Kick him out, keep your place, and your child, and require him to pay child support. He has a good job, he can pay. Get legal counsel ASAP.

“Loving husband of Mrs cowface”

Since: Jan 12

Chillicothe OH

#23 Mar 26, 2013
Here is the reality of this kind of situation- common to thousands of women like yourself & their children.
1.)You & your child have financial supportive rightsÂ… even if you are the one leaving.(with your child)
2.)You must seek professional legal counsel to obtain your financial rights from the father.
3.)Expect this will take some time, and you will need the support of family, friends, church, & community resources to survive while in transition- it will be rough without help.

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