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281 - 300 of 330 Comments Last updated Thursday Aug 7
Themmomoftheyear

Edenton, NC

#301 Nov 13, 2013
I have a son from a previous relationship and I got married. I get child support of just alittle over 200 that my sons father pays to me. His father doesn't pay no Heath insurance on our son. But he now has 2 other kids and I live in North Carolina. That 200 dollars helps me pay for 1/4 of what our child need. I work a full time job so I'm normally the one who pays most of what he needs. I don't ever ask his father for nothing other than to pay the 200 dollars. But since he has got 2 more kids with his current relationship will that drop his child support in North Carolina.
Mike

United States

#304 Nov 17, 2013
bssouth2008 wrote:
<quoted text>So you are saying that your obligation to your child should lower because you decided to add another obligation. I don't think it works like that and if it does it shouldn't. What does how much the mother makes have to do with your obligation to the child in the first place??? That logic does not even remotely compute. If that were the case then you could have 300 children and lower your payment to almost nothing.
Your logic doesn't compute. The person moved on from a shitty relationship and found love in a new one. And they still want to live their life. Get married and have children. They should (and will) get a child support deduction because the courts take that into account. Why should the new children suffer financial distress when the first child gets a lot of money. It should absolutely and will be cut and fair. All the children count. Not just one. Douche
i totally agree

Louisville, KY

#306 Nov 24, 2013
Mike wrote:
<quoted text>
Your logic doesn't compute. The person moved on from a shitty relationship and found love in a new one. And they still want to live their life. Get married and have children. They should (and will) get a child support deduction because the courts take that into account. Why should the new children suffer financial distress when the first child gets a lot of money. It should absolutely and will be cut and fair. All the children count. Not just one. Douche
THANK YOU! Most people on here obviously don't have common sense. I bet most the pissy people on here are women who are ass hurt over the conversation, but they just don't get it. Well im a woman and I get it! My husband pays an absurd amount of child support to his ex for one child. He pays it on time and he pays it willingly on his own, but it makes us both sick when she's sending texts saying she needs it early because she can't feed her other kids by different men (whom she also receives child support from) as well or when she has a new hair color every week or hair extensions. Its absolutely true that the women want the money to take care of themselves as well. And shocker...she is unemployed, married to a military man who lives on base, so free housing, no bills, an enormous amount coming to her in child support, and can't feed her kids??? And after all that, my husband is only allowed to see his daughter only every other weekend. And she comes here with clothes that are too small or have holes in them. So where's that money going? Maybe to the new car you just bought? so I agree whole heartedly that when our child is born, that child support should be lowered because he's going to have another child to take care of. Women out there who have a problem with that, get a job, reevaluate your current situations and ask yourself, "am I just doing this to be a bitch?"
Cnnbr

Euless, TX

#307 Nov 25, 2013
just me wrote:
Your child support will only lower if your income does. The judge will tell you if you can't support another child on what you have coming in don't have one. Thats what he told my x anyways.
Wouldn't all moms receiving child support want their ex's to never have a family with anyone else? It doesn't work like that no judge can tell you not to make a family of your own that's not the governments position to say. If anything it'll benefit society and economy if they grow up to be productive citizens. Anyways, heck yes! Your payments should decrease that is if your income hasn't suddenly skyrocketed! Child support is determined on how much of your income would essentially be spent on raising your child or children wether or not residing in your home!
anna

Atlanta, GA

#308 Nov 26, 2013
nunya wrote:
<quoted text>
Typical money hungry women wanting the child support to stay the same. How about the courts provide proof of spending the child support money on the child rather than on manicures and make-up!
I agree. If a man has child with another woman, the child support for the first one should be lowered. I'm sorry, but the second child deserves a dad and not someone who is enslaved to some woman his dad was never married to in the first place. It's not fair to the child at all. Second of all, the first woman should get off the couch and start contributing money towards her own child - 50% of the costs!!! That would be a fair thing to do. I know a real life story where that particualar woman delibertery deceived a guy and told him she was on birth control when she wasn't and later she said "I forgot to take it." She also was very bitter about keeping the child and made sure to destroy the guys life by taking him to court and making him pay for her deceit for 18 years. She was pretty much a stranger to him. OH, yes, her rich parents bough her a house, a $24K car, remodeled her home, give her $4000 for Christmas and Birthday gifts, etc. Now, the father, has $70 K in school loans that he just can even start to pay off,$330 in car loan, etc., and has a second child on the way with a woman who is working. This is called support out mothers who are lazy and not innocent children. These outdated laws need to be changed, because most of these woman just take advantage of men for their own selfish profits. We live in a society where 50% of workforce is women so there is no reason to have this type of sexicim in our society. Take a look at Sweden! Parents who split up have automatic split custody. All of the dads have even weeks and all of the moms have odd weeks. No body goes to the court to fight these issues because everyone is treted the same and fairly. Only Department of Child Services has an authority to make changes if one of the parents is not fit to be a parent. This whole thing about giving so much money to a woman so she can have an extra income for herself is a disgrace. Shame!!!
dad

Caruthersville, MO

#310 Dec 1, 2013
its very easy. get a lawyer
Kelly

Sacramento, CA

#311 Dec 18, 2013
Blah wrote:
I said something about his mothers wages because the amount paid is based on both parents income. If she made a million dollars and I made $100 a week, they take that into consideration. I want to support my children, but I also have to be able to eat and drive to work to be able to do so. I am in no way trying to get out of paying for any of my children. I was just told that if you have more dependants it lowers it.
You would still pay alot, but having 2 children wouldn't double to amount you pay it would only increase it some- making the amount I pay less. I'm just trying to find a way to make ends meet.
I don't know where you live but in California It WILL lower your support. I read someone wrote that it is illogical to think your obligation to the first child would lower because you had a second.....umm hello! If both kids lived in your home the obligation would now have to be split between the two kids, it is illogical to think any other way. Ask for a review, you will get a lower amount.
Sara

Sterling Heights, MI

#312 Dec 26, 2013
Some of these comments are really ridiculous on both ends. If a man cannot afford his support obligation to a child already in the world he should wrap it up until he has his finances are in order. Same for a woman who gets pregnant with another man and is struggling even while receiving support from her first relationship for a child already born. Why people cannot just learn from their past experiences ....
sarah

San Pablo, CA

#313 Jan 5, 2014
bssouth2008 wrote:
<quoted text>So you are saying that your obligation to your child should lower because you decided to add another obligation. I don't think it works like that and if it does it shouldn't. What does how much the mother makes have to do with your obligation to the child in the first place??? That logic does not even remotely compute. If that were the case then you could have 300 children and lower your payment to almost nothing.
WOW very good point...i totaly agree.
okay

United States

#314 Jan 10, 2014
I understand this is an old post but to all of you women out there that are complaining about how a man needs to do this or that, what about you? So many people in this area, mainly women, complain and say well he needs to pay more, I can't live off of what I'm getting, guess what, the money is not meant to support your whole household. The child support is for the child, that is why it's called child support, not ex and new boyfriend support, or your sister, cousin, and whoever else you let shack up with you. Get off of your butt or back and help provide too. I paid close to 600 monthly for my daughter and still received calls that she needed more. Really? I have custody of her now and didn't ask for a dime from my ex so the judge ordered that she be responsible for half of her medical bills and she still won't pay. But when it came to her getting her money she was blowing my phone up everyday.
okay

United States

#315 Jan 10, 2014
Also to the rest of you women that say he shouldn't have had another kid if he couldn't pay for the first one, you all really have some nerve. How many of you women have 2, 3, 4, or even more different children all by different men. Close your legs and raise one before you pop out a new one every other year or each year. The system is so one-sided that it's pathetic. You women know that you can get WIC, food stamps, a free home, and just about anything else from the state and a man can't get jack****. So stop complaining and provide something yourself. About the child support, yes it will be lowered if you have more kids. They can only take a certain percentage of your income and they do take into consideration that if you have more than one to support, that you can't keep paying the same amount for one plus support the other one or how many ever, so it's basically divided up. So if you were paying 500 for one, now you have two, then one will get 250 and the other will get 250. So sorry to ruin your bumming lifestyle but it's the truth. You lazy tramps need to help out too, bottom line.
OMG

United States

#316 Jan 10, 2014
sarah wrote:
<quoted text>WOW very good point...i totaly agree.
To you and the original poster, are you serious? Why does it matter what the mom makes? Since you can't figure that out on your own let me explain. If the mother is an attorney and makes, let's just say 100,000 a year but the dad works at McDonald's and makes 15,000 a year, then why in anyone's mind would you think it would be fair to take the majority of his wages away while she makes 6,7 times as much as him. He didn't make the kid on his own so why shouldn't she have to help. I don't remember the name of the form but it basically puts the man's income side by side with the woman's. After they figure up how much each person makes, that determines the child support amount. In a case like I described above, the guy might pay 50 monthly if that. Where do you get in your mind that it's solely the man's responsibility to provide financially or even ask the question why does it matter what the woman makes. Just a bunch of freeloaders.
MLR

Milford, MA

#317 Jan 20, 2014
bssouth2008 wrote:
<quoted text>So you are saying that your obligation to your child should lower because you decided to add another obligation. I don't think it works like that and if it does it shouldn't. What does how much the mother makes have to do with your obligation to the child in the first place??? That logic does not even remotely compute. If that were the case then you could have 300 children and lower your payment to almost nothing.
Actually it has everything to do with it... Stop being so politically correct bc in situations like this there are ALWAYS other circumstances involved. If you haven't been through it then take your opinion and gtfo bc you don't know what your talking about. I'm with a man who takes EXCELLENT care of his children. He pays his child support timely, and it's quite a bit. But also, there is more than meets the eye. His ex wife has a boyfriend who makes quite a bit of money and can also provide a roof over her and their head at nearly no cost in a house owned by his family. Yet somehow his children always come over with dirty/shabby clothes that are too small.... But they always have a new iPod/iPad/iPhone/xbox/wii etc. no lie. Not only do we fund there expenses there... We fund there expenses HERE, and we send them home in new clothes constantly bc we feel bad knowing they have to wear these clothes to school... But somehow they always get "lost in the abyss" because they aren't taught to take care of their things. We are by no means made of money and this man is clearly not trying to dodge a CPP or not take care of his children. But at what point is one child more important than another just because it came first? I have two children with my husband and am unable to work because we can't afford a 500$ daycare payment for two children. This question is not unreasonable to ask, in fact I came here in search of the same answers but it doesn't mean myself, my husband, or the man asking this question is a bad person. Get all the facts before you piss out your politically correct opinion. That's all I have to say.
Just Me

United States

#318 Jan 20, 2014
MLR, I agree. We go through the exact same thing. My husband pays monthly, just one kid, the amount seems ridiculous to me but he pays it. His ex always leaves the child with her mother and is out at bars, getting her hair done, nails done, buys herself American Eagle, Hollister, and all of the expensive clothes, yet dresses my stepson in goodwill clothes. She has a huge T.V., a home that the state pays for, every gaming system that's out, just everything but my stepson doesn't get crap. In the winter she sends him to either our home or my husband's side of the family with shorts and t-shirts because she knows none of us are gonna let him freeze so we or they go and buy more clothes. In the summer, it's the same thing, she sends jeans, hoodies that have holes in them, so guess what, then we or they have to take him to get something to wear for the summer. So can anyone guess where his child support is going? She doesn't work that way every time we go to court she has no income to put down so my husband gets screwed over. The last time the judge even asked her if she was disabled and if not why isn't she working. So these exes really are sticking it to the men and I believe that they should have to keep receipts or something just to show that the money is going towards that child and not her needs or her boyfriend's needs. It's a flawed legal system and I don't see it getting better any time soon.
lea

Aurora, MO

#319 Jan 21, 2014
My husbands ex quit her job during their divorce all just to raise the amount of child support she would be getting. Even though my husband had been on working part time for yrs he was still forced to pay on full time wages. Right after the divorce was finalized she went back to work full time. I myself am a mom with a child from a previous marriage and it makes me sick to see woman trying to live off of child support only. I believe the mothers should have to live to to some standard and also be accountable for things. if my ex husband wanted to better his life and make more money to support his now family I wouldnt take it as my opportunity to make more money off of him.
lea

Aurora, MO

#320 Jan 21, 2014
Just Me wrote:
MLR, I agree. We go through the exact same thing. My husband pays monthly, just one kid, the amount seems ridiculous to me but he pays it. His ex always leaves the child with her mother and is out at bars, getting her hair done, nails done, buys herself American Eagle, Hollister, and all of the expensive clothes, yet dresses my stepson in goodwill clothes. She has a huge T.V., a home that the state pays for, every gaming system that's out, just everything but my stepson doesn't get crap. In the winter she sends him to either our home or my husband's side of the family with shorts and t-shirts because she knows none of us are gonna let him freeze so we or they go and buy more clothes. In the summer, it's the same thing, she sends jeans, hoodies that have holes in them, so guess what, then we or they have to take him to get something to wear for the summer. So can anyone guess where his child support is going? She doesn't work that way every time we go to court she has no income to put down so my husband gets screwed over. The last time the judge even asked her if she was disabled and if not why isn't she working. So these exes really are sticking it to the men and I believe that they should have to keep receipts or something just to show that the money is going towards that child and not her needs or her boyfriend's needs. It's a flawed legal system and I don't see it getting better any time soon.
my husband and I are in the same situation. He pays a ridiculous amount of money and yet their mother says she can't afford to take my step son to the dentist when half his tooth is broken off and his nerve is exposed causing him a tremendous amount of pain but yet she can afford trips with friends (not with children), new clothes, hair done and new IPhones. My husband is now having to travel for work just so that we can pay our bills and take care of our new child but she takes it as another way to make more money off of him.
lea

Aurora, MO

#321 Jan 21, 2014
MLR wrote:
<quoted text>
Actually it has everything to do with it... Stop being so politically correct bc in situations like this there are ALWAYS other circumstances involved. If you haven't been through it then take your opinion and gtfo bc you don't know what your talking about. I'm with a man who takes EXCELLENT care of his children. He pays his child support timely, and it's quite a bit. But also, there is more than meets the eye. His ex wife has a boyfriend who makes quite a bit of money and can also provide a roof over her and their head at nearly no cost in a house owned by his family. Yet somehow his children always come over with dirty/shabby clothes that are too small.... But they always have a new iPod/iPad/iPhone/xbox/wii etc. no lie. Not only do we fund there expenses there... We fund there expenses HERE, and we send them home in new clothes constantly bc we feel bad knowing they have to wear these clothes to school... But somehow they always get "lost in the abyss" because they aren't taught to take care of their things. We are by no means made of money and this man is clearly not trying to dodge a CPP or not take care of his children. But at what point is one child more important than another just because it came first? I have two children with my husband and am unable to work because we can't afford a 500$ daycare payment for two children. This question is not unreasonable to ask, in fact I came here in search of the same answers but it doesn't mean myself, my husband, or the man asking this question is a bad person. Get all the facts before you piss out your politically correct opinion. That's all I have to say.
You are exactly right. Everyone has the right to move on with their lives. When the divorce is final the father should only have to take care of the children involved and it really only takes so much money to support 2 children a month and once you get past that amount you are only paying to support the ex as well. The one who pays child support shouldn't get punished for the other being too lazy to get a job all because its easier to just sit back and let the money roll in.
Julie

United States

#322 Jan 27, 2014
All of the dead-beat dads and new girlfriends/wives on here have no problem complaining about the money they are RESPONSIBLE to pay for the child that was willingly created and it disgusts me. If you had a baby in a past relationship, think about your child and the heartbreak and pain he/she feels because of the split. Are you really so selfish that you can't do the right thing and pay a reasonable amount for your kid? If you're irresponsible enough to leave your own flesh and blood without properly caring for them, give their responsible parent enough money because at least HE/SHE is doing it. All i notice on this thread is the complaints toward the mother for this and that when the main concern should always be the real victim: the baby.

So no, do the right thing and pay the money your child needs without being a selfish ass trying to pay as little as possible. If you found your true love, good for you! But your baby still exists and needs to be cared for without feeling like they are meaningless.

Common sense people, stop thinking of yourself and think of your child.

Sincerely, a woman with no children but surrounded by PLENTY of these disgusting cases.
OMG

United States

#323 Jan 27, 2014
Julie wrote:
All of the dead-beat dads and new girlfriends/wives on here have no problem complaining about the money they are RESPONSIBLE to pay for the child that was willingly created and it disgusts me. If you had a baby in a past relationship, think about your child and the heartbreak and pain he/she feels because of the split. Are you really so selfish that you can't do the right thing and pay a reasonable amount for your kid? If you're irresponsible enough to leave your own flesh and blood without properly caring for them, give their responsible parent enough money because at least HE/SHE is doing it. All i notice on this thread is the complaints toward the mother for this and that when the main concern should always be the real victim: the baby.
So no, do the right thing and pay the money your child needs without being a selfish ass trying to pay as little as possible. If you found your true love, good for you! But your baby still exists and needs to be cared for without feeling like they are meaningless.
Common sense people, stop thinking of yourself and think of your child.
Sincerely, a woman with no children but surrounded by PLENTY of these disgusting cases.
Disgusting is right, but you are pointing the finger at the wrong person. If you are truly surrounded by these cases as you say, do you not see anything wrong with a woman that doesn't work and just tries to support herself, a new boyfriend, all off of the CHILD SUPPORT, that's supposed to be for raising the child. It has nothing to do with being greedy or selfish. It's common sense and you may want to reconsider your career choice if you are automatically taking the woman's side. I hope one day you get a chance to experience being with someone that has a child and get to see that person get screwed over by a low life greedy slut.
cam in trub

United States

#324 Jan 30, 2014
My daughter was adopted 2 years ago yet childsupport is still coming after me. I got a lawyer but she says my daughters ADOPTION file is sealed... dhs says they have no proof for her e ever being adopted. The court in Virginia keeps throwing out my request of yes or no on the adoption. If she has an adoption file would that mean she is adopted!!. Gezzz total fed up with dhs... im ex SF military and held complications on my divorce with my ex. Alot of people think im stupid for this but I have seen my daughter twice she is 6 years old now and the mother does everything she can to keep her from me... main reason I agreed to her soon to be ex hubby #2. To adopt her. E is a good man with great family.. she is the devils back hand sooo that's were im stuck... I have no idea where to start... lawyer says can't do anything with out a review. Or an address of my ex wife... she has a new man every week so its hard tracking her down state to state. Dhs won't review me due to a supposed adoption..

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