Teens sleeping over with their boyfri...

Teens sleeping over with their boyfriend/girlfriend

Posted in the Cape Girardeau Forum

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Shocke Mom

Jackson, MO

#1 Sep 6, 2010
My 15-year-old daughter recently had an argument with her (ex-)boyfriend. Apparently there are teenage girls in Cape and Jackson who are allowed to spend the night with their boyfriends. He has friends who do this and wanted to know when they could start having their sleepovers. My daughter was stunned and didn't know how to reply to this. Apparently the trend is the girls spend the night in their own homes and the boyfriend sleeps in the girls' room with her WITH parental knowledge. My daughter told her boyfriend that this would never be allowed in our home and broke up with him. After hearing this, I started asking some of these parents questions about it. One Mom from Jackson told me, "We love "Bobby" and figure they will have sex anyway. This way they are in our home and we know they are safe." I had to pick my jaw up off the floor. Another girl has been friends with my son for years and told him her new boyfriend has been sleeping over. She is 17. My daughter told me about four others and the puzzle is coming together. I am most shocked about who is allowing this to go on. I know this is 2010 and times have changed but this is beyond crazy. Is this a new fad or something because I cannot think of anything else that could ruin a girl's reputation faster. And aren't all the parents worried there will be a pregnancy or are the parents putting these kids on birth control also.
Tighty

Kansas City, MO

#2 Sep 6, 2010
Safer having sex at home? Uhhh, your daughter will get an STD or a baby whether she's at home or not. What idiots. Call me old fashioned,(I'm 28) but my daughter will NOT be having any co-ed sleepovers until she's out on her own. I also think your daughter's boyfriend may be a liar if he's claiming "everyone" is doing it, because I know A LOT of parents would never have this in their home.
elphaba

Lake Saint Louis, MO

#3 Sep 6, 2010
i know of parents that are letting this happen, but the one's that i know of are the boy's parents letting the girls spend the night, probably because the girl's parents don't know about it.
my husband even ok'd it for my step-son's girlfriend to sleepover, i live in a dictatorship and there wasn't a damn thing that i could do about it, except leave, which is a whole other story. anyway, she ended up pregnant and that is a whole other mess that we have to deal with. i know that teenagers are going to do whatever they want. it is the parents job to teach them right from wrong, start in the early years by setting a good example.
my husband now wants to know when i plan on putting my 13 yr old daughter on the pill!!! never!!!! all that does is just ok it for her to be little whore.
Tighty

Kansas City, MO

#4 Sep 6, 2010
Yeah, teenagers will most likely do what they want, but their parents should NOT be enablers.
YesWeCant

Fort Huachuca, AZ

#5 Sep 6, 2010
Elphaba I'm sorry to hear you married a retard. Sounds like you need to get yourself and your daughter away from this perverted guy and his johnny appleseed son. First because your daughter is seeing a dysfunctional "dictatorship" family life, and second, it wouldn't suprise me if someone in that house isn't a negative influence by encouraging your daughter to do whatever she wants. Personally, I think these parents should be put on a sex registry if they allow their underage kids to have co-ed sleepovers. Just sayin...
Really

Saint Louis, MO

#6 Sep 6, 2010
My son is 21 and living at home and goes to college. I know he and his girlfriend are probably having sex , but until he is out on his own there will be no sleepovers. agaive me a break. Parents who allow this are playing with firw. You never know who these girls are or their true age.
It is true and sad

United States

#7 Sep 6, 2010
My daughter has two 17 year old friends that do this. One of the girls shares her bed with boyfriend every night. Dad works out of town and mom allows this. I'm not sure how much dad knows. To top it all off the boyfriend openly cheats on her with other girls. The second girl lies to her parents and says she is sleeping over at another girlfriends house. She actually stays with her boyfriend. his parents know what is going on. He is 16. These parents should be charged with child endangerment in my opinion. These are prominent families and both would be offended if someone called their daughter a bad name. This has been driving me crazy for months.
Really

United States

#8 Sep 6, 2010
Yes kids will find a way to sneak around and have sex. Why make it easier for them to have sex??? I'd rather my daughter be a sneaky shit and find a way to have sex once a week vs letting her have sex every night. Of course, I'd rather my daughter or son be honest w me about it and not sneak around. I sure wouldn't be letting someone shack up with them. People are fuckin idiots.
2012theend

Saint Louis, MO

#9 Sep 6, 2010
When are you all gonna wake up and smell the fucking roses. The more you keep them from doing it the more they are going to want to do it. No point in trying to avoid the inevitable. Teach them about protection and you shouldn't have a problem. When i was 16 I did this and I think I'm now one of the few out of my graduating class that doesn't have a baby. This is 2010, not 1910. It's just like the underage drinking problem. Funny how USA is the only country with a 21 year old drinking age, but has one of the biggest problems with underage drinking. Europeans have 16/18 drinking ages or no drinking age at all in some countries, funny how they do not have the same problems we do.
guest

Scott City, MO

#10 Sep 6, 2010
This goes on in every town and what is the most shocking is that mother's of teen age girls allow their daughter's boyfriends to stay the night.Guess they really want more grandkids then they already have,only diffrence is the mother will be raising another baby too since her daughter is still in high school.
2012theend

Saint Louis, MO

#11 Sep 6, 2010
Get protection. Wear condom, get on the pill, etc. Is it really that hard to do? If all else fails there is always the option of abortion. But not everybody agrees with it.
Wow

Jackson, MO

#12 Sep 6, 2010
2012theend wrote:
When are you all gonna wake up and smell the fucking roses. The more you keep them from doing it the more they are going to want to do it. No point in trying to avoid the inevitable. Teach them about protection and you shouldn't have a problem. When i was 16 I did this and I think I'm now one of the few out of my graduating class that doesn't have a baby. This is 2010, not 1910. It's just like the underage drinking problem. Funny how USA is the only country with a 21 year old drinking age, but has one of the biggest problems with underage drinking. Europeans have 16/18 drinking ages or no drinking age at all in some countries, funny how they do not have the same problems we do.
My parents did not allow me to do it in the 1980s and guess what, I did not have to deal with an unwanted pregnancy or an STD either. You got lucky I guess. I also did not have a bad reputation and people did not consider me a whore. I guess it was inevitable that someone would defend this and you seem to be from our younger generation. Big surprise.
It is true and sad

United States

#13 Sep 6, 2010
Years ago it was rare for a young lady in high school to have a baby and if they did the family was mortified. Today there are tons of teenage pregnancies with girls even getting pregnant on purpose. I personally think in this case the old fashioned attitude is better. If I have to put my teenage daughter on birth control and allow her boyfriend to sleepover, I do not consider that progress and never will. I am conservative but have always considered myself a liberal conservative LOL. If we close our eyes and ignore this, I am afraid that eventually everyone will actually be doing this.
2012theend

Saint Louis, MO

#14 Sep 6, 2010
Yeah I'm 25 so think want you want. One way to put an end to it would be no government aid for those pregnant under the age of 18. But I highly doubt in this day and age of "Have more babies, cash in via tax refund money" that is what is going to happen. If you aren't part of the solution you are part of the problem in my eyes.
Guest

Jackson, MO

#16 Sep 6, 2010
2012theend wrote:
Get protection. Wear condom, get on the pill, etc. Is it really that hard to do? If all else fails there is always the option of abortion. But not everybody agrees with it.
Murder is not an option to me. Of course, there are still teenagers that are going to sneak around but does that mean the parents should condone it. Nooooo! I don't. Hopefully, you will understand when you have your own children, hopefully for their sake.
2012theend

Saint Louis, MO

#17 Sep 6, 2010
I can't have kids because I had a vasectomy performed. Nothing about kids appeals to me. No way I can get a girl pregnant. And don't tell me I'll regret it because I know I won't.
Interested

United States

#18 Sep 6, 2010
2012theend wrote:
I can't have kids because I had a vasectomy performed. Nothing about kids appeals to me. No way I can get a girl pregnant. And don't tell me I'll regret it because I know I won't.
I'm not judging you at all but I am wondering if sleeping w your girlfriend as a teen made your life better or set you up to be promiscuous the rest of your life in your opinion. I mean did you go on to college or get married. I you got married is this your first marriage or multiple? I know you don't want children. I guess I'm just wondering if you think being allowed to sleep over as a teen made your life better or if it set you up for heartache later on. I think allowing my child to dk this would hurt her self esteem and take away her self respect. Just wondering what your take is from someone who has been there.
Guest

Cape Girardeau, MO

#19 Sep 6, 2010
The more you try to prevent it the harder they try...... I don't buy that shit. That just means YOUR child is rebellious and you need some parenting classes. Don't put all teens in that group. There are smart kids out there and parents who put their foot down.
True Blue

United States

#21 Oct 21, 2011
My son has presented this idea to me. In a nutshell, my response , The Holiday Inn is a couple of miles away, you have to pay for a room. Wait a minute, you don't have a job! Focus on graduating high school, so you can go off to college if you choose to do so. Until then, I pay the bills, rent, food, and everything else around here! Last I checked, you do not have any responsibilities of this kind. Kindly take your head out of your ass or move out! Become a responsible, ethical man first!
Hannah Gruen

Cape Girardeau, MO

#22 Oct 21, 2011
The thought that "they're gonna have sex anyway" is grossly untrue. By assuming all kids are having sex, you promote it to become true. My parents were somewhat strict, but had they not been and had I not been raised with respect for myself, I probably could have fallen victim to the whole "teen looooove" the "we're gonna be together forever" BS. It's NOT true that if you prohibit something it'll end up hurting them more. I'm 22, in a healthy, stable relationship with my fiance and I never did anything while I was in highschool.

My future children will NEVER have co-ed sleepovers like that!

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