Frustrated Medina parents seeking hel...

Frustrated Medina parents seeking help for daughter

There are 60 comments on the Akron Beacon Journal story from Aug 23, 2008, titled Frustrated Medina parents seeking help for daughter. In it, Akron Beacon Journal reports that:

Frustration with a county agency led a Medina couple to take their 19-year-old mentally disabled daughter to the police station Friday in hopes of having her declared homeless and placed in a group home.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Akron Beacon Journal.

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John Hawthorne

United States

#1 Aug 23, 2008
Are you kidding me?!? Take care of your daughter. This is a horrible story of "just let someone else care for her." My nephew lives in an apartment for handicapped individuals, and you should see the number of people "dumped" there. These parents need to be strung up...no excuse for turning your back on family....
TakeCareOfOurOwn

Orrville, OH

#3 Aug 23, 2008
These parents should be applauded for taking care of their daughter for 19 years but the time has come where she is a physical threat to their other child and something must be done before that child is taken from them. All the women who are sitting on their butts collecting welfare can get help so why can't these people? My son started 19 fires in my home while everyone was sleeping. I discovered the aftermath when I woke up the next morning. I called everyone I could think of, no help. I took him to Children's Hospital to the ER. They told me he wasn't physically ill so there was nothing they could do. I told them to call Children's Services because I was NOT taking him back to the house and risking the lives of everyone there. They refused, I started to walk out without him. They told me I'd be arrested, I said fine, I'd rather do time for one count of abandoning a child than live with the fact that I didn't stop him from killing 3 other people. Suddenly they found someone to admit him to the psych unit!
I just dont get it

San Francisco, CA

#4 Aug 23, 2008
How do you just dump your daughter off in a home? That is horrible...maybe she has issues because of the way her parents have treated her. I have 4 daughters, and I am pretty sure one of them along the way has suffered from a "welt"...or two. Kids fight, that's life, take care of your daughter, show her some love. Then again, maybe she would be better off somewhere else, then living with those fine parents

“Watch out, I might be angry...”

Since: Sep 07

North Ghetto Hill

#5 Aug 23, 2008
i think the parents need to take some responsibility for their daughter's actions....they seem like they want to get rid of her...i feel bad for the girl...
Jules

Canton, OH

#6 Aug 23, 2008
I just dont get it wrote:
How do you just dump your daughter off in a home? That is horrible...maybe she has issues because of the way her parents have treated her. I have 4 daughters, and I am pretty sure one of them along the way has suffered from a "welt"...or two. Kids fight, that's life, take care of your daughter, show her some love. Then again, maybe she would be better off somewhere else, then living with those fine parents
Did you read the story? This isn't as simple as two sisters fighting. The older daughter is mentally challenged, and cannot simply be reasoned with or disciplined in the same way you'd typically do with kids. I can't say I know the right answer because I have never been in this situation, but if the parents are at a point where they feel they cannot continue to keep the girl at home because she is unmanageable, then someone needs to step in and help them. Maybe the correct thing for this family is somewhere in between -- some help for the parents in how to deal with their daughter as she gets older, so that she can continue to live with them, and some additional services for the girl. If she is functional enough to hold a job, there is hopefully some way she can get help in how to control her outbursts.
Tom Action Jackson

New Philadelphia, OH

#7 Aug 23, 2008
put her in summit county jail they handle these things
GRANDMA D

AOL

#8 Aug 23, 2008
I hate to say this, but someone has to be severely injured or killed before action will be taken.....and this sounds like an escalation to the latter. My feelings are with the parents.
steph

Ashtabula, OH

#9 Aug 23, 2008
How can you people judge this family?...She said herself she wants to be out from her parents wing, a home would be great for her she would feel independent and probably meet friends who understand her.This family needs help.
May Fong

Sheffield Lake, OH

#10 Aug 23, 2008
Anyone that questions the parents have obviously never had to deal with someone like this on a constant basis.

For example. My friends brother stabbed his dad with a steak knife. Because he dropped some meat on the floor.

He didnt want his dad mad at him for dropping the meat. So he created a diversion by stabbing his father with a steak knife .

When you have limited mental capacity sometimes you dont think or act normal...

These people sometimes are very hard to deal with.

24 hours a day 7 days a week.

In a group home situation. You have shifts of people. That get a break and can get away from them to relax and come back with a different frame of mind...

Something that helps maintain a caretakers own Sanity.

Also i am sure she is much stronger than other kids in the house. If she is 9 yrs older than her sister. That wouldn't be so in an adult group home.

Some people with mental limitations have vastly unproportional physical strength... That people need to be aware of and trained to compensate for if they are to safely look after them.

Since: Mar 07

Tulsa, OK

#11 Aug 23, 2008
This is the problem most parents with mentally handicapped children face. They have a child that is out of control, so they want them out of the house, so they can be out of control sum-place else. Sort of, out of sight out of mind, so to speak.

This story speaks volumes in support for us to have permanent facilities for these mentally handicapped folks to be housed and cared for, instead of either on the street, or in a group facility, where the caretakers rarely deal with the residents and dump them off on the hospitals via the local EMS.
Right on

Akron, OH

#12 Aug 23, 2008
Jules wrote:
<quoted text>
Maybe the correct thing for this family is somewhere in between -- some help for the parents in how to deal with their daughter as she gets older, so that she can continue to live with them, and some additional services for the girl.
Apparently, this girl has a history of problems, meaning that she should have been getting professional help (e.g. therapy and, if warranted, medication) to deal effectively with the issues affecting her. The parents would have also benefitted greatly from being engaged and involved in the process.

If the whole family wished to live together peacefully, then the whole family would have had to have been part of the problem-solving and reconciliation. That is, the girl isn't the only "problem" in this family.


Giggity

Shelby, OH

#13 Aug 23, 2008
Glad to see people are still finding new and innovative ways to waste the time of police officers.

Mom, you failed, now suffer the consequences.
Wake up

Louisville, KY

#17 Aug 23, 2008
Don't judge so quickly, you are not living in the house with this family therefore you have no idea what they go through. I have a daughter with severe special and medical needs and I could not imagine putting her in a home BUT there are days when I am at wits end and feel that we (my husband and two other children) are in this alone. You have NO IDEA so do not judge them. It could be you.
May Fong

Sheffield Lake, OH

#18 Aug 23, 2008
Betamax wrote:
This is the problem most parents with mentally handicapped children face. They have a child that is out of control, so they want them out of the house, so they can be out of control sum-place else. Sort of, out of sight out of mind, so to speak.
This story speaks volumes in support for us to have permanent facilities for these mentally handicapped folks to be housed and cared for, instead of either on the street, or in a group facility, where the caretakers rarely deal with the residents and dump them off on the hospitals via the local EMS.
Many times these kids - adults with the mentality of a child. React MUCH better for anyone else but thier parents.... Just like many young kids do...

Sometimes they have the same natural desire to be away from thier parents. But go about it in a much more obnoxious sometimes violent way.

With out the coping skills of many young adults to go ahead and move out and be on thier own. That isn't an option for some. So the best they can hope for is to be on thier own in a group setting.
Ohioflash

Medina, OH

#19 Aug 23, 2008
I know this family & both of their girls. For those of you commenting that are unaware of the situation, I can tell you this...the parents are wonderful people and have done everything for Ashley.

Ashley & her sister are adopted from Russia. As an adoptive parent myself I can tell you there are many issues with Eastern European adoptions, that no one can imagine unless they have been there. I too have experienced things with my own kids but not to this level.

Ashley is a wonderful girl and does have some issues, but I don't live with her. I know what these parents are going thru and wish them the best of luck in getting help for her.

A little more support would be nice rather than badmouthing the parents for abandoning her.
ben

UK

#20 Aug 23, 2008
why is this in the video games forums?

“Do what makes you happy”

Since: Jul 08

Akron, Ohio

#21 Aug 23, 2008
Wow. Nothin' says love like mom and dad treating you like a burden. Geez!

“Do what makes you happy”

Since: Jul 08

Akron, Ohio

#22 Aug 23, 2008
Ohioflash wrote:
I know this family & both of their girls. For those of you commenting that are unaware of the situation, I can tell you this...the parents are wonderful people and have done everything for Ashley.
Ashley & her sister are adopted from Russia. As an adoptive parent myself I can tell you there are many issues with Eastern European adoptions, that no one can imagine unless they have been there. I too have experienced things with my own kids but not to this level.
Ashley is a wonderful girl and does have some issues, but I don't live with her. I know what these parents are going thru and wish them the best of luck in getting help for her.
A little more support would be nice rather than badmouthing the parents for abandoning her.
If they weren't in it for the long haul, they should have never adopted. There are reasons why some people can't (and shouldn't) have children.
May Fong

Sheffield Lake, OH

#23 Aug 23, 2008
Js Brown eyed Girl wrote:
<quoted text>
If they weren't in it for the long haul, they should have never adopted. There are reasons why some people can't (and shouldn't) have children.
19 is the long haul in my opinion..... 18 is the legal time when your no longer responsible for kids and can kick them out of the nest...

Kids are like young eagles.. If they wont fly on their own. Sometimes you have to take em by the hair and physically toss em out of the nest... To fly or die...

Obviously they are doing much more than that. Trying to find a place that the daughter will be safe at. Instead of tossing her to the wolves out on the street....
Spock

Youngstown, OH

#25 Aug 23, 2008
Weak wrote:
<quoted text>
Any readers that think the above contains any hint of originality and/or humor, please respond.
. Yeah that was Funny.

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