Dad's persistence shines light on cyb...

Dad's persistence shines light on cyber-bullying

There are 75 comments on the Beacon News story from Apr 2, 2011, titled Dad's persistence shines light on cyber-bullying. In it, Beacon News reports that:

Naperville Detective Rich Wistocki checks a phone used in his undercover operations as a Child Exploitation Detective at his inside the Naperville Police Department on Wednesday, February 9, 2011.

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Since: Apr 11

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#1 Apr 5, 2011
This article is about me and my fight. To date the school has done nothing to punish the kids. 5 have been positivly identified and there is a potential 6th. A criminal investigation against another is ongoing. The school has done nothing. Tomorrow will be day 20. They are trying to sweep it under the rug but I will not go away. Feel free to call the school and ask why they are taking so long. This is putting my family through hell.

Peter...
Concerned

Montgomery, IL

#2 Apr 5, 2011
Which
n/a

Montgomery, IL

#3 Apr 5, 2011
Which high school is it?
tisha

United States

#4 Apr 5, 2011
The parents won't discipline the little bullying a-holes because their little angels would never be so cruel AND they are happy their kid isn't the one getting picked on. The schools won't discipline the little bullying a-holes because it's the parent's responsibility. And the cops won't discipline the little bullying a-holes...until someone ends up physically injured or dead.

And the kids being bullied have NO escape, what with cell phones, Facebook, the internet, etc. The mean kids follow them everywhere.
Peter

Naperville, IL

#5 Apr 5, 2011
Naperville North
Peter

Naperville, IL

#6 Apr 5, 2011
No punsihments to the kids at all. It's been 20 days. There is way more to this story that will soon come out. All I want to know is will they punish the kids? What infractions did they find and what are the punishments. Below is an email I sent last night to Kevin Pobst the principle, Mark Mitrovich The superintendent and Mike Jaensch the Dist 203 Pres. They had just sent me a wishy-washy letter stalling for more time. They have has enough time.
Please help with my fight - it's for all the kids safety.
Kevin,
Thank you very much for getting back to me. Please keep me in the loop ASAP with what you decide. There is a Polo game Wed night that I am working concessions at and I was hoping to know who I should expect to see playing. I'm not saying I want to see ... playing more. I'm saying that seeing these boys continue to play in games is very frustrating to me. Especially since your coaches have told all of us parents, as well as the students, that if you commit one infraction you are off the team. I have sat in 4 meetings in two years where that was clearly the message. I am still looking for clarification on that. This is my 3rd request.
You mentioned that you,“have consequenced the boy who admitted to posting crude comments on my son's Face book account". I hope that was not just the 3 game athletic suspension that he got for bullying my son in the school. He should certainly face a harsher punishment than the other boy who only committed an infraction in the school. You mentioned to me before, that you cannot punish him anymore because you have already punished him. Well that was your fault for disciplining him without investigating all of the facts that I provided to you the day before. You pushed it off on the AD and you didn't even look at the pages in question. I had to remind you of the incident and then you told me that you had to check the file. You said that my son didn't mention it and I had to tell you that I spent an hour with your dean and liaison officer the day before going through the infractions. It was like you didn't even talk to her about my case. I'm sure you remember the conversation. I have the time and date logged in my narrative if you need a refresher. I'd swear you were trying to give me the 5 minute brush off. I've heard several stories from parents lately about Naperville North's 5 minute brush off policy, especially when athletics are involved. I’m sure you know the immediate case that I’m referring to. Perhaps you should fill the Superintendent in on that one too. I spoke with one of the parents involved this morning and she is fuming about the 5 minute brush off she got. I know her well, you think I’m rough – look out. Bottom line is; ALL kids involved should be promptly punished properly. It's going on 3 weeks.
Please consider this my second request. See below. I realize that you might not be able to give me the names but I deserve to know in writing, what infraction you found and what you decided the punishments to be. The infractions are clearly stated in the Dist 203 handbook and so are the punishments. Look them up and tell me what they are and then tell me what "consequence" you have applied. It's not that hard, enough of the weak language. The longer we sit and wait for an answer the more "Emotional Distress" YOU ARE CAUSING my family and me to go through. If the school would have been responsive in the 1st place this would never have got to this level. It’s time that all of you step up to the plate and make some “Big Boy” decisions about this. I think that all along everyone has thought that I was just going to get tired and go away. Obviously I’m not.
Peter

Naperville, IL

#7 Apr 5, 2011
the rest of the letter.

You see, as I have taught my kids. The teachers and the government work for us - the tax payers. Just because they have fancy titles and lots of degrees, it doesn’t make them any better or smarter than us. Plain and simple, public employees work for us. I guess that makes me your boss, whether you like it or not. I have lots of experience being a boss. I am a successful business man, I started college at 16 and graduated with 2 degrees by the time I was 20. I was running a 50 million dollar/year downtown Chicago computer superstore with over 90 employees by the time I was 25. Prior to my current job, I was president of a global print management company. I could have solved this day 1. Permanently kick the kids out of athletics and suspend them from school for 3 days. Easy enough, something that has some teeth in it but doesn’t ruin them academically for college. I told Dean Cooke that when I met with her. Not my demands, just my suggestion. No one listened. Now this I feel like this is an out of control freight train. It seems to me like you are trying to play chicken with me. I can most assure you that I won’t be the 1st one who blinks. If you think I won’t take you to court because it will cost a fortune, you’re wrong. My father was a successful business man too, it’s in my blood. He sold his business for several million dollars. My family has very deep pockets.
I hate that this has got to the point where I have to threaten a lawsuit. I love North H.S. I am a “Huskie” through and through. My daughter is going there next year. We want to enjoy our experience. Like I told Kevin,“I don’t want to have to piss in my own pool” Please don’t make me.
Figure it out, it’s not that hard.
Peter…
Peter

Naperville, IL

#8 Apr 5, 2011
Sorry the 1st part didn't get posted.

This letter I sent last night to The principle, Kevin Pobst, Superintendent Kark Mitrovich and school board pres. Mike Jaensch. They has just sent me a wishy washy email stalling for time. They have had enough time. I need your help - it's for the kids.

Kevin,

Thank you very much for getting back to me. Please keep me in the loop ASAP with what you decide. There is a Polo game Wed night that I am working concessions at and I was hoping to know who I should expect to see playing. I'm not saying I want to see my son playing more. I'm saying that seeing these boys continue to play in games is very frustrating to me. Especially since your coaches have told all of us parents, as well as the students, that if you commit one infraction you are off the team. I have sat in 4 meetings in two years where that was clearly the message. I am still looking for clarification on that. This is my 3rd request.



You mentioned that you,“have consequenced the boy who admitted to posting crude comments on my son's Face book account". I hope that was not just the 3 game athletic suspension that he got for bullying my son in the school. He should certainly face a harsher punishment than the other boy who only committed an infraction in the school. You mentioned to me before, that you cannot punish him anymore because you have already punished him. Well that was your fault for disciplining him without investigating all of the facts that I provided to you the day before. You pushed it off on the AD and you didn't even look at the pages in question. I had to remind you of the incident and then you told me that you had to check the file. You said that my son didn't mention it and I had to tell you that I spent an hour with your dean and liaison officer the day before going through the infractions. It was like you didn't even talk to her about my case. I'm sure you remember the conversation. I have the time and date logged in my narrative if you need a refresher. I'd swear you were trying to give me the 5 minute brush off. I've heard several stories from parents lately about Naperville North's 5 minute brush off policy, especially when athletics are involved. I’m sure you know the immediate case that I’m referring to. Perhaps you should fill the Superintendent in on that one too. I spoke with one of the parents involved this morning and she is fuming about the 5 minute brush off she got. I know her well, you think I’m rough – look out. Bottom line is; ALL kids involved should be promptly punished properly. It's going on 3 weeks.

Please consider this my second request. See below. I realize that you might not be able to give me the names but I deserve to know in writing, what infraction you found and what you decided the punishments to be. The infractions are clearly stated in the Dist 203 handbook and so are the punishments. Look them up and tell me what they are and then tell me what "consequence" you have applied. It's not that hard, enough of the weak language. The longer we sit and wait for an answer the more "Emotional Distress" YOU ARE CAUSING my family and me to go through. If the school would have been responsive in the 1st place this would never have got to this level. It’s time that all of you step up to the plate and make some “Big Boy” decisions about this. I think that all along everyone has thought that I was just going to get tired and go away. Obviously I’m not.

george

Chicago, IL

#9 Apr 7, 2011
What exactly did these boys do? I know that this bullying hurt ur family but now that your going to sue 5 families you are tearing tthem apartt now. I just think your taking it to far. Please just don't sue that's horrible to see
Ken

Naperville, IL

#10 Apr 7, 2011
I agree with George, this seems to have gone too far. These are high school boys with a joke that has gone too far. They should be punished, just not as harsh as you say and keep their family out of this
lauren

Chicago, IL

#11 Apr 7, 2011
I also agree with george and ken. They are just high school boys just messing around. Sueing is not the right answer. Your son also must have a reason why these kids are making fun of him. nobody just blatenly goes out of their way to make fun of a kid without them having something done to themselves. I think you should try and get the full story of both sides before you even think about sueing
Rob

Chicago, IL

#12 Apr 7, 2011
Sounds like you just want your son to play more in this sport. Sounds like the starters play a lot but your son isn't one of them. And if you are so rich why don't you send your son to a private school
Jennifer

Lisle, IL

#13 Apr 7, 2011
Adding upon what Ken and Lauren previously wrote, this seems like a little situation that has gotten completely blown out of proportion that doesn't require anybody being sued.
annnon

Aurora, IL

#14 Apr 7, 2011
I think that in order to clear this problem up you should sit down with the 5 people involved and talk to them about what you would like to see changed and how you can resolve this without going to court.Its time to put your big boy pants on and realize going to court will do nothing but make your childs life worse. You are going to wreck a kids life by doing this. Yelling at the principal will do nothing but blow up in your face.
not announced

Addison, IL

#15 Apr 7, 2011
Why don’t you give some respect to the principal of Naperville North? Telling him to make “Big Boy Decisions” and saying the district has no discipline, when clearly their doing something , to the man that’s trying to help you and don’t tell me he’s not, you have complete disregard and disrespect for them. Don’t say he’s causing “Emotional Distress” to your family either, is he harassing your child? I’m sure there’s a reason why some players are being played more than others, coaches wouldn’t be coaches at this level if they left out an entire team and why would you expect the principal to play the players? Did you talk to the coach about it? And why did you say there’s been no consequence and then later in the paragraph right after it says they had a three game suspension? Are you even allowed to say what sport this athlete is in? Just because you pay taxes doesn’t mean you pay someone’s salary or for any matter be their boss, do they answer to you? You can’t kick the kicks off the team “day 1” if your such a great boss you would know that, there’s things they have to go through and how is kicking the kids off the team and suspending them for three days going to fix anything? Don’t bring families into this saying you’re going to sue, what is this going to accomplish, especially in a climate as this when many families barely make through. And how does your son feel about all of this? Have you talked to him about it, and how do you know he’s telling the complete truth? Step down from your high chair with all your degrees and achievements and money, that has nothing to do with your son being bullied, and realize your wrong for harassing the district and throwing all your “mightiness around.”
Harold

Chicago, IL

#16 Apr 7, 2011
Not announced says everything that needs to be said. Sueing is pointless and your son probably doesn't want to go to court. It will make the kids dislike him more. Think before you act cause once you make the wrong decision your sons life will be completely changed in a bad way and the 5 families will be wreaked. And what would you gain from this? 6 wreaked families and a sense of feeling that you accomplished something that turned out to be much worse than what this started out to be. Let your son fight his own battles
Brian

Naperville, IL

#17 Apr 7, 2011
Sir, i understand that your boy may have been going through some bullying. Yes kids wont always be the nicest people, that's why they are kids. As an adult though you set the example. You must show your kids that you can't always push things to far. You just have to man up and accept the punishment that the district sees fit. I am sure that these men get paid because they do something about this kind of stuff. The remark earlier in the comments about sueing five kids is absolutely horrible. What in your right mind would make you think that taking money from these families will improve your son's social life? You mentioned being a prestigious man with many qualities. It's time to start thinking about the affects of this decision instead of just yourself. When you are successful that is great, but that doesn't make you top dog everywhere else just because you are a higher rank than anyone else. It's time to make a Big-Boy Decision here Peter.
Ashley

Aurora, IL

#18 Apr 7, 2011
Help me? Its for the kids? Are you serious! Your going to sue 5 families and kick their children off the team to "help the kids" there is absolutely nothing there that should help the kids. You clearly dont understand what being a parent is all about peter. You dont take control of your sons fight you let him fight his own and guide him along the way. Later on in life when he is grown up an have a job and someone bullies him are you going to sue him and his family? I dont think so. That is what a kid is being about to learn things to become more succesful in life. These kids were obviously just messing around and im sure they didnt mean everything they said. And how do you know that everything your son said was true? There are alot of flaws that are in your story and you dont go bashing the school naperville north saying that the principal and superintendent dont know how to punish kids because that is what they are payed to do! To run the school and keep kids within the boudaries of the schools codes. You say your a huskie when you are bashing the school. And when you say to help the kids... Maybe this is to help your son an yourself. Dont take this far because once you do you and your sons lives will be ruined. Parents wont respect you for sueing 5 families which some might not be able to pay for and your sons life because everyone will know what you did and will think your son will do the same thing to them and steer clear of your son. Think before you do anything drastic
Ryan

Aurora, IL

#19 Apr 7, 2011
This situation is an out of control freight train because you have turned it into one. And kicking them out of athletics is dumb cause you ruin their chances for future sports and scholarships. Just because you have a lot of money doesnt mean you can pik on lower class people peter. Suspending them because they said something mean to your kid has nothing to do with bullying. Learn to make a big boy decision peter and look at this from other peoples perspectives first before you get so caight up in yours
Scott

Naperville, IL

#20 Apr 8, 2011
You've taken this too far, your actions are going to ruin your son's social life if people outside of the team hear about this. But on the team you and your son will be known as the people who bullied the school district and the court system into ruining multiple kids lives

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