Should I find out if I am a father?.. And they are twins..
Posted in the Beaverton Forum
Since: Apr 13
#1 Apr 28, 2013
I moved here 6 years ago and met a girl upon arrival, I had only lived here for about 3 weeks at the time when this girl told me she was pregnant. I guess I did not want to believe it because I had only known her for a few weeks. I was not as cool, romantic, and nice as I envisioned myself being, we argued, I repeatedly requested to speak to her OBGYN so I could verify the date of conception.. I did not feel that was an unreasonable request...(I did see her take a pregnancy test which was positive) she called me a few months later and said she was having twins. We argued. We stopped talking, I just pretty much figured that it was a lie.(that it was mine) I figured she would have tried calling me again after they were born if that were the case.
(5-6 years later) I was looking at old pictures the other day, it prompted me to search her on FB. I saw a picture of her with 2 twin girls.. annnnnd they might look a bit like me,(eyes/chin) it's hard to tell.
So what should I do? Go on living my life? or go out of my way to contact her, have a DNA test done.. and then what...? I would enjoy some different perspectives and advice. There are a lot of things to consider... What do you think?
Since: Apr 13
#2 Apr 28, 2013
A bit more detail.. Mid thirties, no kids, never married. I have spent my life traveling the world, driving across country, skiing/snowboarding, experiencing culture.. I have done a lot in life, but feel like I still want to do so much more (ski Antarctica, eat spaghetti in Italy, drink rum in the Caribbean and so on) In my mind, I was not ready to have children... it is a tad selfish yes, but I want to live a big life, and do what I want to do.
On the flip side, I'm in my mid 30's, no kids, I have kind of grown up on my own, At the moment I have no mom/dad/brothers/sisters etc.. so I thought... it would be nice to start to build my circle. So I do not end up alone with no one to visit me in my 70's etc. I finally dated someone with a daughter and discovered that I would be a GREAT dad... I believe I have a lot of love to give and a lot to teach a child about the world and can help turn them into a future good well informed person... but.. I always envisioned my own movie-like romantic story... in short, I always wanted it to be the perfect situation....
I doubt she even knows my last name to find me... so I could remain oblivious.. but I would hate for kids to find me later in life, then I had no chance to raise them (as in shape their minds in youth to "know" things, I would want intelligent offspring) or if i do make an appearance, I will be the villian to friends/family and i potentially make myself liable. Now that I am starting to think about it.. It's a mess.
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