Where is Dave going?

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Dave P

Morehead, KY

#1 Jul 2, 2014
I have to tell where I've been to know where I am going.
After I resigned last February, I learned my wife committed adultery. I forgave her, we moved and tries to make it work.
She committed adultery with anorher man, left, and wants a divorce. I will oblige that. She also financially ruined me. The kids are with her.
Friends, I am homeless. I sleep in a car many nights.
When I announced my resignation, I told the church I would finish the month. They saw fit to give me an immediate exit.
Now as I have bottomed out, my coc parents have told me that seeing my kids isn't important and that sleeping in a car is fulfilling family tradition. I cannot bring my kids to their house on Saturday because, and I quote, "all we do is geared toward Sunday. Can't interfere with the ministry".
I am told that I will be prayed for, to be warmed and Dilled, then told to GO SEE THE METHODISTS AND CATHOLICS about finding shelter. Filled not Dilled.
I try to discuss my beliefs with those of my background. There's no listening or back and forth. Its me being shouted down and yelled at. No communication. True Sommerites.
Randy

Martinsville, VA

#2 Jul 2, 2014
Wow. This was unexpected and difficult to read. I cannot imagine how it must be for you right now. I have traveled a similar road and can relate somewhat with you, although I never became homeless. Is there any family/friends that will help you?

Since: May 10

Location hidden

#3 Jul 2, 2014
Dave P wrote:
I have to tell where I've been to know where I am going.
After I resigned last February, I learned my wife committed adultery. I forgave her, we moved and tries to make it work.
She committed adultery with anorher man, left, and wants a divorce. I will oblige that. She also financially ruined me. The kids are with her.
Friends, I am homeless. I sleep in a car many nights.
When I announced my resignation, I told the church I would finish the month. They saw fit to give me an immediate exit.
Now as I have bottomed out, my coc parents have told me that seeing my kids isn't important and that sleeping in a car is fulfilling family tradition. I cannot bring my kids to their house on Saturday because, and I quote, "all we do is geared toward Sunday. Can't interfere with the ministry".
I am told that I will be prayed for, to be warmed and Dilled, then told to GO SEE THE METHODISTS AND CATHOLICS about finding shelter. Filled not Dilled.
I try to discuss my beliefs with those of my background. There's no listening or back and forth. Its me being shouted down and yelled at. No communication. True Sommerites.
sorry for you issues with both your wife and family and church. I have no words of comfort but Paul wrote these words 16 At my first defence no one took my part, but all forsook me: may it not be laid to their account.

17 But the Lord stood by me, and strengthened me; that through me the message might me fully proclaimed, and that all the Gentiles might hear: and I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion.

18 The Lord will deliver me from every evil work, and will save me unto his heavenly kingdom: to whom be the glory forever and ever. Amen.
Dave P

Morehead, KY

#4 Jul 2, 2014
Thank you both. JC the one great comfort I receive is from our Bible characters who had no home or were suffering greatly. I have finally learned that with food raiment and shelter to be content. It took getting to this place to learn this lesson.

I have one true friend where I work who helps me tremendously. My parents live 40 miles from my work so I cannot travel back and forth every day.

Now that mentally I am getting back where I need to, I am going to return to church SOMEWHERE. I need it and if I am not in church my kids won't be either.

Its the where I am working on.

Since: Sep 13

Location hidden

#5 Jul 2, 2014
Not sure where you live, but I am sure there should be Catholic ressources in your area just for these circumstances.
If you are jobless and need a some time to get settled, 2 months ago I had to place my wife who has early onset dementia into a assisted living home.
I now have 2 spare bedrooms. I have already notified the Church here that they are available for those in need through the Church.
The problem is Miss,, but at least for the weekends you can get some good food and rest.
Let me know.

Since: Sep 13

Location hidden

#6 Jul 2, 2014
I forgot to say , if you need help with housing along with what you can get from Catholic resources in your area, I would gladly be able to provide 2 to 3 months rent to help.
Bobby

Mansfield, TX

#7 Jul 2, 2014
I wish we lived near each other Dave, but I feel handicapped and unable to help. I am praying that God will bring you through this and that those around you will show compassion by being the literal hands and feet of Jesus.
Dave P

Morehead, KY

#8 Jul 2, 2014
This thread is why I enjoy our conversations. We all go to battle over churches and doctrines, but deep down I can see Christ in everyone here except for that Prophet of Jesus Christ guy.

Bobby, Mike, thanks for your offers. Guys, NO ONE beats the Catholic church in terms of helping those in need. Its not even debateable. Mike, to have put your wife in a place for assistance, to offer bedrooms for those in need, that my friend is what our lives should be. If I wasn't in KY I would accept your gracious offer.

Bobby, you can pray my friend. Please do.

Its these instances where I can say that Jesus does live in us. I see it here.

State agencies here do not care. The IRS does not care-i have a sizeable 401 K but I don't qualify for hardship!?!?!?

I do have employment still. Great help. Without them I would be in real trouble.

Spiritually I am bouncing back, and honestly is my greatest concern. My kids are being cared for, I provide for them and keep them all weekends wherever I can.
Randy

Martinsville, VA

#9 Jul 2, 2014
I hate that your own parents/family are not more involved in helping you get on your feet. In my ordeal, luckily, my parents have been there for me. I know the pain of not being with your kids each night. I know the pain of being forsaken by a wife for another man. I know the pain of divorce. In these, I can relate. Being homeless, I canít begin to relate and my heart goes out to you. Likewise, I also understand your concern about raising your kids with the Church.
xxx

Nashville, TN

#10 Jul 2, 2014
Dave P wrote:
I have to tell where I've been to know where I am going.
After I resigned last February, I learned my wife committed adultery. I forgave her, we moved and tries to make it work.
She committed adultery with anorher man, left, and wants a divorce. I will oblige that. She also financially ruined me. The kids are with her.
Friends, I am homeless. I sleep in a car many nights.
When I announced my resignation, I told the church I would finish the month. They saw fit to give me an immediate exit.
Now as I have bottomed out, my coc parents have told me that seeing my kids isn't important and that sleeping in a car is fulfilling family tradition. I cannot bring my kids to their house on Saturday because, and I quote, "all we do is geared toward Sunday. Can't interfere with the ministry".
I am told that I will be prayed for, to be warmed and Dilled, then told to GO SEE THE METHODISTS AND CATHOLICS about finding shelter. Filled not Dilled.
I try to discuss my beliefs with those of my background. There's no listening or back and forth. Its me being shouted down and yelled at. No communication. True Sommerites.
There is nothing that I can really say except this:

You should remind your parents that God established the family in Eden before He established the church. Your parents are doing things backwards by putting the church/ministry in front of the family.
Randy

Martinsville, VA

#11 Jul 2, 2014
Good point, xxx. I recall as a youth my dad would never consider missing Wed night Church and God forbid missing Sunday. Now in his 70ís, he has expressed regret for having things backwards in the past.
xxx

Nashville, TN

#12 Jul 2, 2014
One more thing actually:

I hope Proverbs 21:9 provides you with a degree of humor while you are in your present state.
Dave P

Morehead, KY

#13 Jul 4, 2014
Hey XXX: ol Solomon was absolutely right. Dealing with an adulterous wife who was acting childishly in other ways was worse than a leaky roof. I do much better without any "leaks" lol.
Dave P

Morehead, KY

#14 Jul 4, 2014
This past Wednesday I attempted to have a conversation with my dad. He is a coc preacher, and closer to hardliner than he realizes.
I told him I was no longer a "coc guy" and that all groups we know are wrong on some things. I told him that I didn't see Acts 2:38 as teaching that baptism is FOR remission of sins but Rather into or toward.
He disagreed-but forgot he had agreed with that very position before. He said I was following those awful denoms. I then asked how could they be a division if they were never in the body.
He then proceeded to grab his Greek word study to "show me" that eis meansFOR OR REASON. Heard this a million times. But as he read, for and reason were the LAST meanings fgiven for eis and said I was picking and choosing what I wanted. My response-what about those meanings you just skipped over?
Basically it was yelling and dogmatic statements. He was not LISTENING but telling me his beliefs and telling me what I believed.
Dave P

Morehead, KY

#15 Jul 4, 2014
We also speak the language of Ashdod like I have mentioned here before. Dad spoke of "obeying the gospel plan of salvation in His appointed way". Where in the blue hell is that at?
What most coc professionals never get is that this kind of stuff repels people, and then they take PRIDE in that because as Paden says, "truth repels".
I call bs.
What attracted people to Jesus? His LOVE for people. His compassion. Many people of His day were attracted by bothHis love AND His mmessage.
It was the power structure that repelled at the message.
If we are turning people off, perhaps its not because they don't like truth. Perhaps its because all they see is condemnation, pride and arrogance, etc.
Never ceases to amaze me

Chicago, IL

#16 Jul 4, 2014
Dave P wrote:
We also speak the language of Ashdod like I have mentioned here before. Dad spoke of "obeying the gospel plan of salvation in His appointed way". Where in the blue hell is that at?
What most coc professionals never get is that this kind of stuff repels people, and then they take PRIDE in that because as Paden says, "truth repels".
I call bs.
What attracted people to Jesus? His LOVE for people. His compassion. Many people of His day were attracted by bothHis love AND His mmessage.
It was the power structure that repelled at the message.
If we are turning people off, perhaps its not because they don't like truth. Perhaps its because all they see is condemnation, pride and arrogance, etc.
I would be cautious of the love teaching that has spread throughout our churches the past couple of decades. It is very popular today and the Pope plays it to the max. Elton John recently commended the Pope for his acceptance of gays and made the claim Jesus would approve of gay marriage if he were alive today. Someone should inform the Pope and Elton John that Jesus is alive today and has not changed regarding gay marriage, if God did change it then I have missed it somehow. Sorry to hear things have not worked out ideally for you and your family(past and present). I read this earlier today and like it "Past failure does not nullify a future purpose" It might apply or then it might not, you choose.
Never ceases to amaze me

Chicago, IL

#17 Jul 4, 2014
I should have said but forgot that I believe the "love" teaching of today is no more than an acceptance of sin and intended to include unsaved into the church. It will always be popular to feel right about your sin and still be in the church. Just stand back and take a look before you jump into the love teaching of today.
Dave P

Morehead, KY

#18 Jul 4, 2014
There is a difference in accepting sin and loving someone. I agree about the homosexual issue. We can love them but it has to be clear that it is sin and living as a homosexual, practicing isn't acceptable to God or the church.
I don't hold the "love teaching" you speak of. But in coc there is no room for love between dogmatism and making sure everyone else is "wrong".

Since: Jul 14

Location hidden

#19 Jul 15, 2014
Dave P wrote:
There is a difference in accepting sin and loving someone. I agree about the homosexual issue. We can love them but it has to be clear that it is sin and living as a homosexual, practicing isn't acceptable to God or the church.
I don't hold the "love teaching" you speak of. But in coc there is no room for love between dogmatism and making sure everyone else is "wrong".
You now have my attention. I can now see why Left-footers appeal to you. You was put down by the Church you once was part of and since your family turned a cheek to you.

Since: Jul 14

Location hidden

#20 Jul 15, 2014
Randy wrote:
I hate that your own parents/family are not more involved in helping you get on your feet. In my ordeal, luckily, my parents have been there for me. I know the pain of not being with your kids each night. I know the pain of being forsaken by a wife for another man. I know the pain of divorce. In these, I can relate. Being homeless, I canít begin to relate and my heart goes out to you. Likewise, I also understand your concern about raising your kids with the Church.
The Church is not an organization but an organism. I am up in age and can not relate to you on this but pray you find the path for which God has laid.

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