OK Health Care Freedom Amendment, Sta...

OK Health Care Freedom Amendment, State Question 756

Created by CitizenTopix on Oct 11, 2010

1,568 votes

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Packing Heat

United States

#36983 Mar 22, 2013
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Marcus

United States

#36984 Mar 22, 2013
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
Donnie

United States

#36985 Mar 22, 2013
An elderly JAG approached a very beautiful young woman in Wal-Mart.

"Excuse me," he said, "I've lost my wife somehow.
Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"

The woman, feeling a bit of compassion for the old fellow, said, "Certainly, Sir, do you know where your wife might be?"

"I have no idea... but every time I talk to a woman with boobs like yours, my wife appears out of nowhere."
Donnie

United States

#36986 Mar 22, 2013
Jose and Carlos are panhandling at the freeway off ramp.

Jose drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage free
house and has a lot of money to spend.

Carlos only brings in 2 to 3 dollars a day.

Carlos asks Jose how he can take home a suitcase
full of $10 bills every day.

Jose says, "Look at your sign." It reads: "I have
no work, a wife & 6 kids to support"

Carlos looks at Jose's sign. It reads: "I only need another $10.00 to move back to Mexico"
Packing Heat

United States

#36987 Mar 22, 2013
Donnie wrote:
Jose and Carlos are panhandling at the freeway off ramp.
Jose drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage free
house and has a lot of money to spend.
Carlos only brings in 2 to 3 dollars a day.
Carlos asks Jose how he can take home a suitcase
full of $10 bills every day.
Jose says, "Look at your sign." It reads: "I have
no work, a wife & 6 kids to support"
Carlos looks at Jose's sign. It reads: "I only need another $10.00 to move back to Mexico"
This is the real donnie
Marcus

United States

#36988 Mar 22, 2013
Justaliar is the REAL liar!
Donnie

United States

#36989 Mar 22, 2013
Fake Packing Heat wrote:
<quoted text>
This is the real Fake donnie
All alone again justaliar?
Donnie

United States

#36990 Mar 23, 2013
Fake Donnie wrote:
<quoted text>

All alone again justaliar?
We is all fakes!!!!!!!!!! and alone!!!!!!!!!!
TAMARA

United States

#36991 Mar 23, 2013
HOW THE FIGHT STARTED

Marcus rear-ended a car this morning. So there they are alongside the road and slowly the driver gets out of the car. And, you know how you just get so stressed and then life seems to get funny?
Well, Marcus couldn't believe it, the other driver was a DWARF!
He storms over to Marcus"s car, looks up at him and says,'I AM NOT HAPPY!'

So, Marcus look down at him and say,'Okay. Well, which one are you then?'

...And that's when the fight started....
Jesse

United States

#36992 Mar 23, 2013
Donnie's forefather decided to march in the holy crusades. Concluding that his wife should wear a chastity belt while he is gone, he locks up her nether regions and gives the key to his best friend, Packing Heat's forefather. He tells him,“If I do not return within four years, unlock my wife and set her free to live a normal life.”
So, the husband leaves on horseback and about a half hour later, he sees a cloud of dust behind him. He waits for it to come closer and sees his best friend.“What's wrong?'” he asks.

“You gave me the wrong key!”
Zane

United States

#36993 Mar 23, 2013
Packing Heat,an American businessman is on a business trip in Japan and hires a hooker.

The whole night, this Japanese hooker keeps screaming: "Hoshimota! Hoshimota!" He can't quite remember what the word means, but he's sure he's pleased the hooker to best of his ability.

The next morning, he goes to play a game of golf with his Japanese business partner when he makes a hole-in-one. Everyone is congratulating him in Japanese and he can't think anything to say but "HOSHIMOTA!"

Concerned, his partner turns to him "What do you mean it's in the wrong hole?"
Donnie

United States

#36994 Mar 23, 2013
A married couple both lost their jobs at the broom factory, and were having a hard time finding new jobs.

Unfortunately, their mounting credit card debt required some immediate income.

Mandy, the wife, suggested that she could whore herself out, but her husband was a little less than thrilled about the prospect.

But financial necessities got the best of her, and she went behind her husband's back to go whoring.

She came back one night with a huge wad of cash, and fessed up to her hubby. He was upset, but asked how much she made.

"$398.10," she said.

"Who paid ten cents?" he asked.

"Everybody."
Bluebird

United States

#36995 Mar 23, 2013
A boy goes to the drug store with Donnie and sees the condom display.

Boy: "Dad, why do they do packs of one condom?"

Dad: "Those are for the high-schoolers for Friday nights."

Boy: "So, why do they make packs of three?"

Dad: "For the college guys for Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights."

Boy: "Then why do they make packs of 12?"

Dad: "Those are for married couples -- you know, January, February, March."
TAMARA

Edmond, OK

#36996 Mar 23, 2013
Wouldn't it be nice if the posting idiot would grow up and find something to do besides posting under every serious poster's name. Maybe they should go to work or donate their time to some worth while organization!
ElohimsOkie

Broken Bow, OK

#36997 Mar 23, 2013
Get ready for a second holacaust, how do I know? Obama said it would never happen again.
Donnie

United States

#36998 Mar 23, 2013
Read today where Obama has a lower approval rating than Bush had his last year in office with the M.E.

Ya know like with Egypt,Jordan,Palestine,Lybia,I raq,yadayada yada....blah,blah,blah....LOL, kinda hard to break Ol' Bush's record but Obama did!

15% approval rating!

*Pew Institute
Donnie

United States

#36999 Mar 23, 2013
Are all these stupid, ill-mannered, republicans and wantabee repigs in the 1% of the ultra rich or are they just surrogates for the 1%?

A mouthpiece for the rich and usually talking out their azz because their mouth knows better."""
Zane

United States

#37000 Mar 23, 2013
JAG took his blind date to the carnival. "What would you like to do first, TAMARA?" asked JAG.

I want to get weighed," she said. They ambled over to the weight guesser. He guessed 120 pounds. She got on the scale; it read 117 and she won a prize.

Next, the couple went on the Ferris Wheel. When the ride was over, JAG again asked TAMARA what she would like to do.

"I want to get weighed," she said.

Back to the weight guesser they went. Since they had been there before, he guessed her correct weight, and JAG lost his dollar.

The couple walked around the carnival and again he asked where to next. "I want to get weighed," she responded.

By this time, Joe figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her roommate, Laura, asked her about the blind date, "How'd it go?"

TAMARA responded, "Oh, Waura, it was wousy."
Jesse

United States

#37001 Mar 23, 2013
A married Packing Heat goes to confessional and tells the priest, "I almost had an affair with a woman."

The priest asks, "What do you mean, almost?"

"Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped."

The priest replies, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to go near that woman again. Now, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."

The man leaves confessional, says his prayers, and then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and then starts to leave.

The priest quickly runs over to him and says, "I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!"

"Well, Father, I rubbed up against it and you said it was the same as putting it in."
Bluebird

United States

#37002 Mar 23, 2013
Zane was in a bar all day and he had to use the bathroom. He was in there for a while, yelling, so the barmaid reluctantly went to the bathroom to check on him.

"Sir, what are you yelling about? You're scaring the customers."

"Every time I try to flush the toilet something keeps biting my balls!"

"Sir, please get off the mop bucket."

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