I think it's time we apply Special High Intensity Training........<quoted text>
We are getting much closer. Here at F.A.R.T (Further Aviary Research Thread) we spend numerous hours discussing the endless hypothetical scenarios on this matter. Please check in regularly for updates. Thanks for visiting FART
TO: All bird threaders
Subject: Special High Intensity Training
In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from bird threaders, it will be our policy to keep all bird threaders well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give bird threaders more S.H.I.T. than anyone else.
If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the thread, please see Miss E. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.
Bird threaders who donít take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Since our managers took S.H.I.T. before they were promoted, they donít have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T. already.
If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in a job training others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST.(B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T.). Those who are full of B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T. will get the S.H.I.T. jobs, and can apply for promotion to DIRECTOR OF INTENSITY PROGRAMMING (D.I.P.S.H.I.T.).
If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.).
BOSS IN GENERAL
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)