It is just the perpetual life and death struggle and we have to take the good with the bad and it all ends for everyone sooner or later. It was not a sudden loss. She spent 2 years being paralyzed by a stroke, so there was a bit of time to prepare for the inevitable. I don't know if a sudden loss is worse or not, but certainly the shock of a sudden loss seems worse.I'm sorry to hear about you guys losing your wives. That is really sad. My dad died a long long time ago (when him and mom were in their thirties). Mom never did remarry. I know it has got to be hard but hope you are doing okay.
I sometimes think that Divorces are harder for people to deal with. With death the deceased has no options and we miss them, but with divorces one has all that rejection to deal with. Maybe a toss up.