Cletus' Forum: Candid interactions wi...

Cletus' Forum: Candid interactions with Cletus Kettle

Posted in the Bandera Forum

Cletus Kettle

United States

#1 Jun 25, 2012
How yer doin day? Cmon git yer ass whooped.
devil anse

United States

#2 Jul 14, 2012
Try to whoop my ass boy. I'll climb you like a ladder and on the way down kick out every rung!
devil anse

United States

#4 Jul 14, 2012
Where you at boy?
devil anse

United States

#5 Jul 14, 2012
Still sleeping with yo sis, I reckon!
Cletus Kettle

Dallas, TX

#6 Jul 14, 2012
I be sleeping with yer mama. She dun like being porked in her ass. Make me a lil creampie for yer to lick up when I leave. How yer doin?
devil anse

United States

#7 Jul 14, 2012
If yo be a sleepin with my mama yer be a sleepin with yer there aunt Sadie son. Why fer yer be a doin that? Can't yer fine no one else to poke?
devil anse

United States

#8 Jul 15, 2012
I herd say some folks tell me Cracker Barrel be yorn favor rite place to eat vittles cuzzin Cletus. Them there folks at that there Cracker Barrel tells me yorn favor rite vittles be possum stuffed with coontang and pickeled gopher pecker topped off with granny gravy. How yer doin cuz?
devil anse

United States

#9 Jul 15, 2012
Where you be boy? Reckon that gopher done bit off yer tongue. Don't yer know yer sposed to kill that there gopher yer found yonder fore yer put that rascal down yer gizzard cuz? Ma told me yer were dummer than a stump but I done told her, ma cuzzin Cletus he ain't dum he just done gone and got ignernt 'cause his memaw be his ma and his pa be his brother.
devil anse

San Antonio, TX

#10 Oct 19, 2013
I ben waitin fer yer boy! Whur yer ben? Corn holin yer granpa?
Devil anse

San Antonio, TX

#13 Apr 19, 2014
What be wrong you lil possum face? You be to busy in them thar hills makin moonshine? Rise and shine valentine that ther shine aught be bout ready by now!
Cletus Kettle

San Antonio, TX

#15 Apr 19, 2014
Devil anse wrote:
What be wrong you lil possum face? You be to busy in them thar hills makin moonshine? Rise and shine valentine that ther shine aught be bout ready by now!
I dun be missin fer a while. Dun felled inside yer meemah's hole when I be porking her. I dun forgot to tye a rope round my waist. I dun felled in. I keep yellin.... help, help, help, help.... it dun echo in her big pork ass How yer doin?
Devil anse

San Antonio, TX

#16 Apr 19, 2014
Cletus Kettle wrote:
<quoted text>
I dun be missin fer a while. Dun felled inside yer meemah's hole when I be porking her. I dun forgot to tye a rope round my waist. I dun felled in. I keep yellin.... help, help, help, help.... it dun echo in her big pork ass How yer doin?
I told yer before don't be mesin round with your aunt Sadie we don't need no more inbred kinfolk. We be needin new blood in the family line else everone goin trn out like you!
Cletus Kettle

San Antonio, TX

#17 Apr 19, 2014
Devil anse wrote:
<quoted text>
I told yer before don't be mesin round with your aunt Sadie we don't need no more inbred kinfolk. We be needin new blood in the family line else everone goin trn out like you!
I dun call yer meemah Sadie and dun broked up. Us white folk don't breed outside the family. Wats wrong wit you boi?
Devil anse

San Antonio, TX

#18 Apr 19, 2014
Cletus Kettle wrote:
<quoted text>
I dun call yer meemah Sadie and dun broked up. Us white folk don't breed outside the family. Wats wrong wit you boi?
Dang nab it cuzzin Cletus you be a heartbreaker to! If in you ain't careful weez gonna have us a family feud a going! Jus let you know ma says to in vite you to the Easter egg hunt weez gonna have in da mornin. Come on over an bring the chillin she ain't seen her kids in a month of Sundays. I swear I gets my kids mixed up with yorns cause they all looks the same!
Cletus Kettle

San Antonio, TX

#19 Apr 20, 2014
Devil anse wrote:
<quoted text>
Dang nab it cuzzin Cletus you be a heartbreaker to! If in you ain't careful weez gonna have us a family feud a going! Jus let you know ma says to in vite you to the Easter egg hunt weez gonna have in da mornin. Come on over an bring the chillin she ain't seen her kids in a month of Sundays. I swear I gets my kids mixed up with yorns cause they all looks the same!
Cuz us folk all look da same. Yer kids be the ones wit big ass foreheads and no smarts. We all be dumb to. How yer doin?
Devil anse

San Antonio, TX

#20 Apr 20, 2014
Don't forget and bring tha shine when you gets here fer the Easter egg hunt! By the way we done caut that Easter bunny and we be cooking him for dinner. He gonna make sum damn fine virttles. Ma says to give you the fur frum the bunny so you can start making yur coat of many colors!
Cletus Kettle

San Antonio, TX

#21 Apr 20, 2014
I dun feel da connekchun. I think we be brudders? Who's yer daddy?
Devil anse

San Antonio, TX

#22 Apr 20, 2014
Cletus Kettle wrote:
I dun feel da connekchun. I think we be brudders? Who's yer daddy?
I be thinking you might be my daddy. Not sure tho that family tree done gots too many branches I be all confused.

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