Parents of Asperger's Children

Parents of Asperger's Children

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Lisa

Uvalde, TX

#1 Mar 11, 2008
My son was recently diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. He is 6 years old and in Kindergarten. In fact, he was diagnosed twice--once by a private practice psychologist and again confirmed by a school psychologist. I'm looking for other parents with children that have Asperger's. To me, he seems pretty much like any other child just with a few little quirks.

I need advice from other parents on what they do with their children. Do you all keep taking them to psychologists or do you just raise them as "normal" children and go on with life? I refuse to put my son on medication because I doubt that it is going to solve anything. I don't see a point in taking him to the psychologist because he doesn't seem to help anything either. I'm pretty much just looking for what other parents do in hopes that I'm doing the right thing with my child.
Carol

San Antonio, TX

#2 Mar 12, 2008
I live in south Texas and we are raising our 8 year old grandson who was diagnosed first with Aspergers when he was 2. We did not want to go the drug route either so gave him colloidial gold instead. He has been re-diagnosed now with Autism Spectrum Disorder, which is an even higher functioning level than Aspergers. We have been commended for having always raised him as a "normal" child. We don't use the excuse that he has ASD nor do we let him use it. He knows that we expect him to behave and preform just like all the other kids. This has made him "exercise" his brain in that he has been TAUGHT to think before he acts. The school system however, would not accept the diagnosis because we weren't medicating him. They removed all his special services which caused him to really fall behind and he ended up repeating K. We are now medicating him and WOW the change in him is astounding. Everyone who meets him for the first time now is astounded to find that he has ASD. Finding the right meds is always a challenge and ASD is no exception. He has been on this one now for about a year and there is a huge change in his behavior and comprehension. He has been seeing the same developmental specialist for 5 or 6 years and we wouldn't be without him. A good therapist can be your most useful tool for ways to deal with all the different problems that arise. He/she can also be a very valuable assistant for getting the schools to provide services. There are organizations and support groups you can explore also. The bottom line, I think, is that you know your child better than anyone and only you can decide what is the best for him.
Lisa

Uvalde, TX

#3 Mar 12, 2008
Carol wrote:
I live in south Texas and we are raising our 8 year old grandson who was diagnosed first with Aspergers when he was 2. We did not want to go the drug route either so gave him colloidial gold instead. He has been re-diagnosed now with Autism Spectrum Disorder, which is an even higher functioning level than Aspergers. We have been commended for having always raised him as a "normal" child. We don't use the excuse that he has ASD nor do we let him use it. He knows that we expect him to behave and preform just like all the other kids. This has made him "exercise" his brain in that he has been TAUGHT to think before he acts. The school system however, would not accept the diagnosis because we weren't medicating him. They removed all his special services which caused him to really fall behind and he ended up repeating K. We are now medicating him and WOW the change in him is astounding. Everyone who meets him for the first time now is astounded to find that he has ASD. Finding the right meds is always a challenge and ASD is no exception. He has been on this one now for about a year and there is a huge change in his behavior and comprehension. He has been seeing the same developmental specialist for 5 or 6 years and we wouldn't be without him. A good therapist can be your most useful tool for ways to deal with all the different problems that arise. He/she can also be a very valuable assistant for getting the schools to provide services. There are organizations and support groups you can explore also. The bottom line, I think, is that you know your child better than anyone and only you can decide what is the best for him.
You mention that you live in S. Tx. is it in San Antonio? I live in Del Rio and I find myself pretty much at a loss in finding information to help us. Please let me know where you take your grandson--clinic, dr. etc. I am not happy with our psychologist. He does not help at all. All he complains about is my lack of desire to put him on medication. Even the school disagrees on having him put on medication.

He is a little artist. He draws and paints beautifully. We all feel that the medicines will ruin his creativity. He is also excellent at math. He does all of the problems in his head. The only problem we are having is letters. He doesn't care much for those. He doesn't recognized them by themselves really. He seems to have memorized the alphabet line and he goes does the line in his head thinking about it and tells us the letter. I'm worried that he will never learn to read. When the doctor mentions medicine, I don't see how that will help. But then again, I could be wrong.

What medicines has your grandson tried?
Carol

San Antonio, TX

#4 Mar 13, 2008
I live in Pipe Creek which is near Bandera, about 35 miles from San Antonio. I take my grandson to a wonderful psychologist in S.A. He was very open to using the gold. He was also very angry when the school insisted he needed medication. This didn't happen until the 3rd year he was in school. He started in PPCD when he was 3 because we had an early diagnosis. We don't really have much in the way of support groups here either. My grandson is also a very good artist and loves math. He also loves to play instruments. He is also having problems with letters and reading. He is reading at a kinder level right now but at least he is reading! He has problems recognizing his letters and numerals even though he can do the actual math and recite the alphabet. I came up with a letter chart for him that the teacher uses in class and has even asked if she can reproduce it for other students because it has been so helpful for him. If you would like to email me I would be glad to give you my email and even send you the letter chart. I know how hard it is to find anyone else who understands. Especially because they seem so "normal". We have tried adderall, which didn't really work at all, and he is on resperitol now, which seems to be working pretty well. There are some side effects with it though that you might not be willing to deal with.
Lisa

Uvalde, TX

#5 Mar 13, 2008
Carol wrote:
I live in Pipe Creek which is near Bandera, about 35 miles from San Antonio. I take my grandson to a wonderful psychologist in S.A. He was very open to using the gold. He was also very angry when the school insisted he needed medication. This didn't happen until the 3rd year he was in school. He started in PPCD when he was 3 because we had an early diagnosis. We don't really have much in the way of support groups here either. My grandson is also a very good artist and loves math. He also loves to play instruments. He is also having problems with letters and reading. He is reading at a kinder level right now but at least he is reading! He has problems recognizing his letters and numerals even though he can do the actual math and recite the alphabet. I came up with a letter chart for him that the teacher uses in class and has even asked if she can reproduce it for other students because it has been so helpful for him. If you would like to email me I would be glad to give you my email and even send you the letter chart. I know how hard it is to find anyone else who understands. Especially because they seem so "normal". We have tried adderall, which didn't really work at all, and he is on resperitol now, which seems to be working pretty well. There are some side effects with it though that you might not be willing to deal with.
Hello Carol:

I would love to correspond by email with you. My email address is dsulaica@stx.rr.com. Any information that you can help me with will be extremely appreciated.

I know what you mean about them looking so normal. My son is a beautiful little boy. In fact, everywhere we go people compliment him on how handsome he is. My husband likes the fact that everyone points out he is his little clone. But it bothers me that people that don't know him think that he is spoiled, that we need to spank him or something. The school psychologist told me that wouldn't it be nice if that fixed the problem. But people out there are too quick to judge without even knowing anything.

I really hope that other people that read this will try to inform themselves on Autism Spectrum Disorders. Just because a child isn't obviously disabled, doesn't mean that there is not a problem. The school wasn't doing anything to assist my son. They kept telling me that we would worry about it next year. And I did mention to them, what if he was obviously down syndrome or in a wheel chair or something, would they take the same position. That's when they got an evaluation with a school psychologist, speech pathologist, and a diagnostician. They already had a private psychologist's diagnosis but wanted their own.

I love my little boy so much. He is the baby out of four kids, all the others girls. At home, he is the funniest, sweetest child. Out of the house, things get wild. Too bad that I can't shelter him forever in his little comfort zone, which is why I try so much to find information anywhere I can.

Thank you so much for all of your information. You have really been helpful. I hope to hear from you.
Carol

San Antonio, TX

#6 Mar 13, 2008
I sent you and email. It will be from lotsoflights.
Jerry

United States

#7 Mar 24, 2008
Is there a support group of Adults anywhere?
My friend is a very high functioning Asberger type and would benefit from meeting with other adults and discovering techniques to sort out the world that work with adults.
Becky

San Antonio, TX

#8 Mar 25, 2008
Suggestions anyone?? I have a 14 year son diagnosed with ADD and Aspergers Syndrome. He struggles with socialization daily and has few friends. He takes Concerta and Prozac daily and this helps some. He would be open to group therapy, but not individual therapy. Any suggestions of anyone local that might help?
Monica

United States

#9 Mar 26, 2008
Becky wrote:
Suggestions anyone?? I have a 14 year son diagnosed with ADD and Aspergers Syndrome. He struggles with socialization daily and has few friends. He takes Concerta and Prozac daily and this helps some. He would be open to group therapy, but not individual therapy. Any suggestions of anyone local that might help?
Brent Evans in San Antonio has a good reputation for group therapy of kids with poor socialization skills. My 17 year old son with ADD and Aspergers has been at the Achievers Center for Education located at University Methodist Church for 4 years and the improvement in his social and academic skills has been nothing short of miraculous. When he first enrolled his academic and social skills were poor and he had no friends.The enrollment is only 23 students from 6-12th grade and the student/teacher ratio is low, so lots of one-on-one instruction is given. They also have a ZERO tolerance policy for bullying.
Becky

San Antonio, TX

#10 Mar 27, 2008
Thanks Monica. I'll look into this. I'm so happy that your son has found success! It is so hard watching them struggle with things that come so naturally to others.
victoria

San Francisco, CA

#11 Apr 10, 2008
My son has also been diagnosed with Asperger. He is 5 years old. But I dont believe it. He meets the criteria but it seems to me the positive characteristic outweight the negative ones. I have the same dilema, he seem normal and above in many areas. I will put him in a social skill group; there is where the problems are.
Lisa wrote:
My son was recently diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. He is 6 years old and in Kindergarten. In fact, he was diagnosed twice--once by a private practice psychologist and again confirmed by a school psychologist. I'm looking for other parents with children that have Asperger's. To me, he seems pretty much like any other child just with a few little quirks.
I need advice from other parents on what they do with their children. Do you all keep taking them to psychologists or do you just raise them as "normal" children and go on with life? I refuse to put my son on medication because I doubt that it is going to solve anything. I don't see a point in taking him to the psychologist because he doesn't seem to help anything either. I'm pretty much just looking for what other parents do in hopes that I'm doing the right thing with my child.
jennifer

New Braunfels, TX

#12 May 9, 2008
Lisa wrote:
My son was recently diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. He is 6 years old and in Kindergarten. In fact, he was diagnosed twice--once by a private practice psychologist and again confirmed by a school psychologist. I'm looking for other parents with children that have Asperger's. To me, he seems pretty much like any other child just with a few little quirks.
I need advice from other parents on what they do with their children. Do you all keep taking them to psychologists or do you just raise them as "normal" children and go on with life? I refuse to put my son on medication because I doubt that it is going to solve anything. I don't see a point in taking him to the psychologist because he doesn't seem to help anything either. I'm pretty much just looking for what other parents do in hopes that I'm doing the right thing with my child.
Dear Lisa, my son has been diagnosed with aspergers also. I had always known that he was "quirky", but being a first time mom, I didn't have a lot to compare him to. He was extremely verbal and could discuss interesting topics by the time he was two. especially the topics he was interested in, as you know, aspies can become fixated on a topic of interest for a long time. I was just a proud mommy with an exceptionally bright child- so I thought. Things didn't get tricky until he became school aged. Even then, I shrugged it off as social imaturaty. I did have the sense to keep an open dialogue with his pediatritian, He said that we should watch him, and as long as he grew socially and academically , we should just monitor development. Things were OK until second grade. By OK, I am speaking relately. We live and continue to live our lives with limitations. His two siblings, his father, and I have been accomodating his needs for a long time. Again, his diagnosis is recent. I still don't know if we helped or harmed his situation by adusting our lives so much around him. I am only now understanding how much we as a family have given up for him. I don't know how extreme your child's diagnosis is, but we have had to do a lot for my son. Because of the extreme structured livestyle we provided in terms of controlling anything and everything that could offend his senses, and keeping things as predictable and structured as possible, we delayed the inavitable. I knew he needed structure, familiarness, and routine to be happy and well behaved, but I didn't know our world would come tumbling down without it. Aspergers children are not any normal child, they are extremely unique and with every turning corner in their lives, they will need the skills to move forward. Medication won't help Aspies, but medication can help other conditions that can come hand in hand with it. Please learn as much as you can, you are going to be your child's strongest advocate for the long road ahead of him. My son must begin behavior modication therapy for extreme anxiety that he developed because of an abrupt change in our lives(relocation to another country-we are back home now) He will also have social skills instruction- as Aspies suffer greatly in this aspect of their lives, and we as a family must begin therapy in order to learn how to support his needs without keeping us all in a glass bubble. Good luck--educating yourself is key. PS, I am originally from Del Rio.
Stacy

Lockhart, TX

#13 Aug 30, 2008
Do you have contact info for Brent Evans? My son really needs something like this!
Monica wrote:
<quoted text>
Brent Evans in San Antonio has a good reputation for group therapy of kids with poor socialization skills. My 17 year old son with ADD and Aspergers has been at the Achievers Center for Education located at University Methodist Church for 4 years and the improvement in his social and academic skills has been nothing short of miraculous. When he first enrolled his academic and social skills were poor and he had no friends.The enrollment is only 23 students from 6-12th grade and the student/teacher ratio is low, so lots of one-on-one instruction is given. They also have a ZERO tolerance policy for bullying.
John

Farmington, MI

#14 Sep 29, 2008
I hope that all of you mightbe able to help me and my friend who has an 11 year old son with AS. He frequently has trouble taking his medications, and then gets so frustrated and angry that he lashes out, hitting or shoving his mother. She has had to go to the hospital recently for the injuries. I am concerned that this will escalate as he gets older and stronger. His physical abuse is starting to be aimed at his siblings as well. Obviously, my friend does not want to have her child taken away from her, but she is at a loss to find an alternative. Does anyone else know if there are any other options for her? I don't want her to be living in fear of being pushed down the stairs or experiencing any other bad outcomes. Thanks for your ideas and thoughts.

By the way, she does not live in Texas, so if you know of any online resources, that would be the best for her. Thanks.
Jilly Jo from Texas

United States

#15 Sep 29, 2008
Becky wrote:
Suggestions anyone?? I have a 14 year son diagnosed with ADD and Aspergers Syndrome. He struggles with socialization daily and has few friends. He takes Concerta and Prozac daily and this helps some. He would be open to group therapy, but not individual therapy. Any suggestions of anyone local that might help?
I have worked for with mentally,pysically, AND psychologically challeged children from age 3-22 ,and acourse, the autistic for many years. I used to agree with the parents on the no medication side. As years passed, and working one on one with these beautiful people I decided in some cases medication is GOD SENT. Don't be scared to try it! Don't live miserably like that! I know you love them so much, but don't drive yourself into insanity over it. God wouldn't have you live like that.
Maree

Austin, TX

#16 Sep 30, 2008
My son is 16. He has always been different from the time he was born. Not just different, but extremely difficult. He has had a plethora of diagnosis and medications. Most of his life it has been bi-polar but the medications never helped very much. He will not go to school so we had to start home schooling. Recently his therapist said that he fit Asperger syndrome more than a mental illness. I brushed that off. I did not believe my son could be autistic, especially to be diagnosed at his age.
Then I started researching it and was surprised how much it did fit him. Last week my daughter brought up that same topic and she knew nothing about the conversation with his therapist. She has a friend that works with people with Aspergerís. She told me that he met my son and felt he had many of the same characterizes as those that he worked with. Is it possible that he could have been misdiagnosed all of these years? I feel so angry at his doctors. They have had him on so many drugs and could not see what was really wrong. I do not know where to turn or how to start making this right.

BTW, I am also in San Antonio.
Janet

San Antonio, TX

#18 Nov 18, 2008
Carol wrote:
I live in Pipe Creek which is near Bandera, about 35 miles from San Antonio. I take my grandson to a wonderful psychologist in S.A. He was very open to using the gold. He was also very angry when the school insisted he needed medication. This didn't happen until the 3rd year he was in school. He started in PPCD when he was 3 because we had an early diagnosis. We don't really have much in the way of support groups here either. My grandson is also a very good artist and loves math. He also loves to play instruments. He is also having problems with letters and reading. He is reading at a kinder level right now but at least he is reading! He has problems recognizing his letters and numerals even though he can do the actual math and recite the alphabet. I came up with a letter chart for him that the teacher uses in class and has even asked if she can reproduce it for other students because it has been so helpful for him. If you would like to email me I would be glad to give you my email and even send you the letter chart. I know how hard it is to find anyone else who understands. Especially because they seem so "normal". We have tried adderall, which didn't really work at all, and he is on resperitol now, which seems to be working pretty well. There are some side effects with it though that you might not be willing to deal with.
Can you please tell me the psychologist for Aspergers in San Antonio? Thanks!
Aspiemom

Glenmoore, PA

#19 Jun 28, 2009
Hello...I toally agree with you about the part that peolpe think we need to "discipline" our children...have you found anything that works. My son is 6, Aspergers, ADHD, ODD....has a terrible potty mouth..words we don't use in our home. And a very mean temper. Timeouts dont work...and he appreciate being sent to his room...any suggestions?
David

Austin, TX

#20 Oct 7, 2009
I wonder if anyone knows of programs to help adult age individuals diagnosed with Asperger's to find jobs or to do evaluations concerning appropriate career choices? Thanks, David
Debra San Antonio

New Braunfels, TX

#22 Oct 26, 2009
We adopted our son at age 5, he is 15 now. He was a child who sat in a corner and rocked back and forth, to a bright amusing young man. He was diagnosed with aspergers at age 6 and was given a small dose of Albilfy. This helped him focus at school where most of the problems occur. He loves writting, movies, and books and rock music. He can tell you anything you want to know about movies, ie characters, actors, date it was released, plot, etc. He gets good grades at school with a few program adjustments in math. He has few friends, and likes it that way. He becomes anxious in large crowds, and doesn't like strangers brushing up aganist him like in public transportion. So we allow him to do the things he likes and we dont push him into situations we know will not go well. We have always had discipline and he knows the house rules and school rules and follows them. We just moved to San Antonio and am looking for a doctor, counselor that will continue his medication. I have never been a pill pusher either, but found the difference in him with meds and without meds is extreme. The meds allow him to enjoy life without the constant worry about everything else. Does anyone have a doctor that they really would recommend?

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