It Is 10:00! Do you know where your s...

It Is 10:00! Do you know where your socks are?

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“Bringing You The News”

Since: Dec 11

In new and different ways.

#1 Dec 8, 2011
Good evening sports fans, I am Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones, bringing you the news from around Topix. No, not the Topix news! Members news.

Today has been quite busy on the Internet Troll forums, where the sweet and almost never combative Cincinnati Cutie has finally had enough from evil, and even more importantly, trampy and less than truthful Trashmouth Granny. Yes my adoring fans, it is true, the gloves are off and Donkey Kong is being played with fierce vengeance!

Arriving on the scene on behalf of the Cutie were many admirers who have all stated that she is a tough cookie, despite her laid back and happy go lucky demeanor. Most notably of these fans are Fast Gun II and his trusty sidekick Trash Man McGilicutty. Showing for the Trashmouth were...hold a moment, let me see if I have this straight. Ah yes. No one. Word around the Troll Forum is there is an angry chihuahua running loose barking madly at passersby and a confused obese man flinging the “c” word around like a drunken monkey. Arriving late on the scene was a teary eyed retired KFC manager going by the alias DeVil Woman. And man is she upset! She devoured a bad boy, who in turn blasted her in the face with a tremendous kick he gleefully referred to as his power legs.

On the scene accusations fly as DeVil Woman points her bony finger, which appears to have a boogie on the end of it, madly accusing all of being socks. Wait, is this right? Yes, that is what she said, socks!

What kind of news story do you jokesters have me doing anyway? I am going to need a raise...

Ahem...Apparently DeVil Woman has so many socks of her own, she believes the entire world to be nothing but a giant drawer full of un-laundered foot ware. Amazingly this psychotic ailment is contagious as the earlier mentioned Chunky Monkey also believes the world is a laundry hamper full of stinky tube socks. This illness is fast becoming an epidemic, as news has just come in that Drunkity The Clown is in fact Aunt Florence Introvert. Where will it end?

Coming up next.

A Magenta Pegasus will be joining us to speak about lavender candle sets near your computer, and how it can reduce the stress of verbally eviscerating your online nemesis.

“I'M YOUR TIGER”

Since: Mar 11

That one over there

#2 Dec 8, 2011
My socks are in the drawer.

Since: Sep 11

Virginville, PA

#3 Dec 8, 2011
LMAO

Great thread.

Mine are on my feet.

It's coooold tonight.

“Bringing You The News”

Since: Dec 11

In new and different ways.

#4 Dec 8, 2011
This just in! A hit has been put out on Swan Lake Lilly! You heard it here first folks. Apparently Lilly has been fingered as a Denver terrorist sympathizer, and an all around bad dancer. Witnesses on the scene describe the event as a turbulent and terrifying encounter with a giant blob known as Mama Trashmouth. Mama has ordered the hit, but denies it stating a fuzzy cell signal and that she was in the woman's toilet at the Mini Mart, causing an echo making the call undecipherable.

We will return after this short message. Though we are not really sure what that message is.

&fe ature=related

“Its Eaiser to fool people than”

Since: Sep 11

convince them they are a fool

#5 Dec 9, 2011
Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones wrote:
This just in! A hit has been put out on Swan Lake Lilly! You heard it here first folks. Apparently Lilly has been fingered as a Denver terrorist sympathizer, and an all around bad dancer. Witnesses on the scene describe the event as a turbulent and terrifying encounter with a giant blob known as Mama Trashmouth. Mama has ordered the hit, but denies it stating a fuzzy cell signal and that she was in the woman's toilet at the Mini Mart, causing an echo making the call undecipherable.
We will return after this short message. Though we are not really sure what that message is.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =jtjW78IUgOQXX&feature=rel ated
LOLOLOLOLOLOMAO..

“Let's talk to each other:”

Since: Apr 10

NOT about each other!

#7 Dec 9, 2011
TIGERBLOOD wrote:
My socks are in the drawer.
My drawers are on my socks. Y'all have a good'n.

“Your Troll is My Goal”

Since: Oct 11

How Do You Like Me Now

#8 Dec 9, 2011
Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones wrote:
This just in! A hit has been put out on Swan Lake Lilly! You heard it here first folks. Apparently Lilly has been fingered as a Denver terrorist sympathizer, and an all around bad dancer. Witnesses on the scene describe the event as a turbulent and terrifying encounter with a giant blob known as Mama Trashmouth. Mama has ordered the hit, but denies it stating a fuzzy cell signal and that she was in the woman's toilet at the Mini Mart, causing an echo making the call undecipherable.
We will return after this short message. Though we are not really sure what that message is.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =jtjW78IUgOQXX&feature=rel ated
Thats funny...ha ha ha ha ha ha[ squeak] Opps, ha ha ha ha..snifff..Oh man..

“Fight Like A Girl”

Since: Jul 10

Boston, MA

#9 Dec 9, 2011
I love this.......more please!!!!!!!!

Since: Sep 11

Virginville, PA

#10 Dec 9, 2011
LOL

Me too!!!!

It's way better than actually reading the nonsense first hand.

Good Afternoon Girlfriend.

“Fight Like A Girl”

Since: Jul 10

Boston, MA

#11 Dec 9, 2011
Miss-Behavior wrote:
LOL
Me too!!!!
It's way better than actually reading the nonsense first hand.
Good Afternoon Girlfriend.
Hi sweetie...lol its still morning here We are a hour behind you... I hate all that fighting on the IT forum.... Lol I forgot you were everybody on here...Wow it must keep you busy.....How are you able to be every where posting all at the same time and you never sleep....Im in awe at your power...* wink**wink*

“Bringing You The News”

Since: Dec 11

In new and different ways.

#12 Dec 9, 2011
Good morning Denver, I am Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones reporting on the territorial unrest happening as we speak in Internet Troll. It appears that a notorious hairy blob monster known as Mama Trashmouth has thrown down the gauntlet and declared war on Fast Gun 2 and Drunkity The Clown stating irreconcilable differences, and that she now owns stock in Internet Troll. She claims Topix officials back her plan to take up permanent residency because it is the only place she is safe from prosecution by her peers.

When asked when this meeting took place she simply said it was no ones business and began calling visitors “poopoo heads”, and then ran into the swamp and consumed an alligator. Attentions then turned to Mama's partner DeVil Woman who had nothing to say, and ran from the scene sobbing uncontrollably. Witnesses report DeVil Woman was later spotted in a near by pet shop biting the heads off of kittens mumbling “Pounce this, fuzz ball! Why must you be so hateful?” No one is sure what she is talking about.

Topix officials could not be reached for comment.

Up next, we will have a visit with a man who claims his great grandmother is an ape and that is why he is so damn hairy.

Since: Feb 11

Location hidden

#13 Dec 9, 2011
Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones wrote:
Good morning Denver, I am Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones reporting on the territorial unrest happening as we speak in Internet Troll. It appears that a notorious hairy blob monster known as Mama Trashmouth has thrown down the gauntlet and declared war on Fast Gun 2 and Drunkity The Clown stating irreconcilable differences, and that she now owns stock in Internet Troll. She claims Topix officials back her plan to take up permanent residency because it is the only place she is safe from prosecution by her peers.
When asked when this meeting took place she simply said it was no ones business and began calling visitors “poopoo heads”, and then ran into the swamp and consumed an alligator. Attentions then turned to Mama's partner DeVil Woman who had nothing to say, and ran from the scene sobbing uncontrollably. Witnesses report DeVil Woman was later spotted in a near by pet shop biting the heads off of kittens mumbling “Pounce this, fuzz ball! Why must you be so hateful?” No one is sure what she is talking about.
Topix officials could not be reached for comment.
Up next, we will have a visit with a man who claims his great grandmother is an ape and that is why he is so damn hairy.
How do I sign up for automatic updates?

“Bringing You The News”

Since: Dec 11

In new and different ways.

#14 Dec 9, 2011
Coming up tonight:

It is eerily quiet and speculation is setting in as viewers are wondering where the heck everyone went. Could it be that a new network adopted by the Sonoftheevilone has literally emptied Topixland, or was everyone devoured by Mama and DeVil Woman?

Film at 11!

“Bringing You The News”

Since: Dec 11

In new and different ways.

#15 Dec 9, 2011
This just in! The eerie quiet that is Topix has been explained. The blob monster known as Mama Trashmouth has disrupted a wedding, and New York in general. Spectators are glued to their television sets as this story unfolds.

“Bringing You The News”

Since: Dec 11

In new and different ways.

#16 Dec 9, 2011
This just in! Even Kevin, is NOT Kevin.

What is the world coming to?

Join us tonight as we explore the wild world of online stalking. Our special guest will be Oliver Greezpig, who has been masquerading for years as a female lawn gnome.

“Its Eaiser to fool people than”

Since: Sep 11

convince them they are a fool

#17 Dec 10, 2011
I admit. I do not know where My socks are. Because I am a sock.

“Fight Like A Girl”

Since: Jul 10

Boston, MA

#18 Dec 10, 2011
Lelu Tia Carlatta Jones wrote:
This just in! Even Kevin, is NOT Kevin.
What is the world coming to?
Join us tonight as we explore the wild world of online stalking. Our special guest will be Oliver Greezpig, who has been masquerading for years as a female lawn gnome.
OMG.....I hadn't a clue about that whole Kevin thingy.......Great work Lelu.....

Since: Jun 11

Charlotte, NC

#19 Dec 10, 2011
I do believe you're imitating a news reporter.
I don't believe I like that.
There should be a law against this! ;)

Since: Nov 11

Charlotte, NC

#22 Dec 10, 2011
This can't be happening...
I thought I was the famous one...
*sniff sniff*

“I'm not a gynecologist,”

Since: Dec 10

But I'll take a look.

#23 Dec 10, 2011
I think it's obvious that somebody has issues...

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