Is my mom an abusive mom?

Posted in the Alberta Forum


Sterling, VA

#1 Nov 5, 2013
Is my mom an abusive mom?I'm curious what other people think, based on the things my mom has done to me over the years. I personally think she's an abusive mom, but she'd deny it and most people would think I'm crazy because she comes across as sweet and innocent on first impressions (but so do I, and I have a dark side lol). For starters, she let my dad beat me up from the time I was a young child until I was around 20 years old. I even had to call the police on him because the beatings got so bad, but when the police came, she claimed to have seen nothing and I was "lying" because I take anti-depressant medications. She thought boys need discipline, and was totally justified in letting him give me black eyes. When I was in elementary school/middle school, she'd schedule her work hours so she'd be home while I was in school while she'd be at work when I was at home. Shouldn't things be the other way around? Whenever I needed help with anything, even something as simple as $7 for a protractor for Geometry class, the automatic reaction was "no", and World War III would erupt if I ever questioned her lazy parenting. College was really difficult for me. I'm gay, and people were really mean to me because of my sexuality. I was even raped on campus, but my mom could care less. "Go to the health center. What am I supposed to do about it?" she said. I developed a severe anxiety disorder and was having constant panic attacks, but again, she refused to take me to a psychiatrist, and just told me to "be a man" and "cut that out." My father wants nothing to do with me, so he refused to drive down to the college to pick me up for breaks like Thanksgiving and Christmas, and she wouldn't care. She'd just leave me down there to suffer with no food because the dining hall was closed. After I graduated college, it was my parents' idea for me to move 6 hours away to a big city. I moved, and I was miserable there. I couldn't get a job with the bullsh!t degree I had so I worked several cashier and fast food jobs, all of which I got fired from. I'm a total loser. With no income, I was forced to prostitute myself, and when she found out that I was having unprotected sex with hundreds of guys, she still could care less, and told me to "get a job that has health insurance", and all my problems will be solved. Well, I couldn't get a job that has health insurance, and I was hospitalized with no insurance for having kidney failure. The hospital bills were $50,000, and I couldn't get on Medicaid because, ironically, the amount of money I was paying in rent on a monthly basis disqualified me for it. So now I have a $50,000 debt on my credit report that I'll never be able to pay off. I had an abusive boyfriend at the time, and he was always telling me how stupid/ugly I am. But again, my mom could care less that I was being abused, and refused to help me get away from him. Frankly, I believe she loves her dogs a lot more than she loves me. What do you guys think? Is this an abusive mother?

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